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Today at the playground I witness the phenomena that I like to call the "Be careful" momma. Let me describe this momma to you and explain why she is my number one playground pet peeve.
She is the mom who thinks her little darlin is made of glass. Coming out of her mouth at 7 second intervals are the following phrases "Be careful Skyler!" "Not too fast, Skyler!" "Skyler, hold on, you might fall!" "Skyler, do NOT jump off of that!" Her face is tense as she watches her child play....if you can call his slow, controlled movements "playing".
I am not a "Be careful" momma. I am a "Have fun" momma.
At the playground you will find me trying to get my kids to jump off high spots...that is what high spots are for, right? You can hear me encouraging them to push the merry-go-round faster. When they fall, I generally say "That was an awesome wipe-out, can you show me another one?" I don't worry about them hurting themselves. What is a broken leg, in the scheme of things? I'd much rather they be adventurous and willing to risk a small injury for the sake of an awesome accomplishment than be too scared to ever do anything cool. But that's just me.
10:25 PM - Jul. 17, 2008 -
Reformed Be Careful Mama
I once was a BCM. We now have 3 boys with a 4th on the way and I have to admit I love all the stunts they pull and high flying tricks they preform. Our oldest used to be cautious, but now that I have lightened up, he is much more daring. I enjoyed reading your blog.
3bugs - 11:03 PM - Jul. 17, 2008
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My biggest pet peeve is when the BCM's decide they need to inform *me* of the dangerous antics my children are performing.
"Oh, be careful hon....I'm sure your momma doesn't want you way up there" said ever so sweetly as she looks over at me, waiting for me to go rescue my child. I used to get pushed into running over to my child and trying to appear the "good parent".
But not anymore. I just take a quick glance to make sure a fatal accident isn't about to take place, and then call out "You go girl ~ you're doing a *great* job" as I smile ever-so-sweetly to the BCM.
I know, I know....
~Lori
www.michiganmomma.blogspot.com
Anonymous - 2:34 AM - Jul. 18, 2008
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Hmmmmmmmm
Most first time mom's are BCM's.
The second one rolls around (especially if the second comes in less than 2 years) and BCM is now mellowing.
The third one rolls around and BCM is pretty relaxed.
There has to be balance.
Encouraging small kids to throw all caution to the wind and be 'adrenaline' junkies is extreme.
Wrapping them in bubble wrap before you send them out to play is the other extreme.
There is balance in the middle........
Proverbs are just chalked full of excellent child rearing skills!!
Laura
Dizzy - 7:06 AM - Jul. 18, 2008
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Great comments everyone. I love the abbreviation BCM.
You're right, there is a balance. I don't desire for my kids to be adrenalin junkies, not in the sense that they are always looking for the next thrill. But, a few of my boys are a bit fearful, so I try to push them past their limits and get them to do things that scare them.
And yes, the more kids you have, especially if they are boys, the more relaxed you become.
MotherJoy - 8:02 AM - Jul. 18, 2008
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I see myself as a balanced mom. but I do want my son to have some sense of fear that he could get hurt or else he'd try anything and not even be cautious at all. One day he will be behind the wheel of a vehicle and I want him to have some caution and sense of responsibility...if that makes sense.
after all he skateboards, does bmx tricks, and dives off the diving board ... and he won't turn 7 until the end of the month.
we had to care for a "wipe out" from doing what he calls an endo on his bike earlier this week...he didn't cry but boy was it a big wound on his shin....now he's running around like all is better and no more bruising.
I'd love to experience the mellowing that comes with more children. Prayers deeply appreciated that HE would bless us with more healthy arrows...and quickly.
noahsmom - 10:29 AM - Jul. 19, 2008
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Hi,
I was just checking out your blog and will be adding you to my friends list. I am not a careful mom either. When my oldest was about 3 (he is medically fragile) the doc asked if I let him jump and play. My son spoke up and said that he loved to jump and play and eat ants with dirt. LOL! All true I am afraid. The doctor said that was the best thing for him. LOL!
BLessings,
Dawn
4sweetums - 5:54 PM - Jul. 20, 2008
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