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Here's my promised birth story. There is also a photo montage on Youtube. Check it out, and leave a comment!
My VBA3C Story
After three cesareans, one of which was a failed vbac attempt, I was determined to have a VBA3C for this birth. The entire pregnancy was spent praying and seeking what God wanted for me. I sensed that He was leading toward a VBA3C, but everywhere I turned there were obstacles. Finally, in my 36th week, I switched to a doctor that was 2 hours away. I had so much going against me: three past cesareans, being over 300 lbs at birth, and being 2 hours from the doctor. In the last weeks, I almost gave up so many times. But I kept praying, and believing, and I threw out the doubts whenever they crept up.
Sunday was a busy day for us, with our normal activities of church in the morning and hubby’s afternoon praise band practice. I planned on going to my mom’s while hubby was at practice so I could use her big tub to take a bath and try to get the baby rotated into a better position.
Throughout the pregnancy, I obsessed about the baby’s position. My past three babies were posterior, and I knew that the malposition had played a part in the cesareans. For a few days prior to Sunday, I’d had some light prodromal labor, which I knew was my body’s way of trying to rotate the baby into a more favorable position.
The prodromal labor had been showing itself as contractions that I could only feel in my lower abdomen. It was such an intense feeling located near the incision that I called Dr.T the day before to make sure I wasn’t feeling anything that indicated rupture. Finally after doing some research on the internet using the term “false labor” instead of ‘prodromal labor’, I found that it often presents itself only in the lower abdomen.
The boys and I were dropping hubby off at practice when I began to feel contractions. It was around 3pm. They felt the same as the previous contractions, with tightness and minor pain only in my lower abdomen plus they had no pattern. I knew that if I wanted “real” labor to start that I should get the baby rotated.
When I got to mom’s house I took a great big bubble bath and tried to coax my stubborn baby into tuning anterior by getting on my hands and knees and letting my belly hang in the warm water. The bath was so relaxing, but the baby didn’t rotate. The contractions completely stopped after I got into the bath. But, I expected that, and tried to stop worrying about the baby’s position.
The boys and I went to pick up hubby and he automatically asked about the contractions. I told him they had stopped, and he knew I was disappointed. We went home, fixed dinner, bathed the boys, and got everyone off to bed. At some point, I went to the bathroom and noticed that I had lost my mucus plug. I was so excited.
I began feeling contractions again around 9 pm. They seemed more intense than the earlier contractions, but after timing for a bit, I could tell they had no pattern. The contractions started picking up, and I was considering calling Dr.T, but I was still uncertain. They were about 8 minutes apart, but they still weren’t completely reliable. I would have three or four at 8 minutes apart, and then have another at 2 minutes apart. I was sure it was prodromal labor again, and I didn’t want to waste a trip just to be wrong.
Hubby and I didn’t really know what to do, but we started to prepare like we would be going to the hospital that night. We straightened up the house and packed a few things. Around 11:30pm, the contractions were coming 5 minutes apart. They were slightly more intense, but I could talk and walk through them. At the peaks, I had to stop what I was doing. Finally, after a lot of discussion, we decided to call Dr.T.
Dr.T asked how long the contractions had been going and I told him 3 hours. When he found out they were five minutes apart, he told me to come to the hospital. I said “I don’t think this is real labor.” He told me to come anyway, even if it meant a wasted trip.
After I called and we made the decision to go ahead, it seemed like the contractions went into to super speed. I was waddling around trying to finish packing and my husband was trying to get the house ready. He called his dad to come stay with the kids, and he was moving way too slow for me. As the contractions started picking up, I kept saying “We’ve got to go. We’ve got to go.”
In a matter of a few minutes I had gone from wondering whether it was real labor to knowing it was real labor. Now I was really concerned that we might not make it to the hospital, which was an hour and a half away. As soon as we got onto the highway, I started shaking uncontrollably. In my mind I thought “Shaking means transition.” The contractions were now coming 3-4 minutes apart, and I didn’t feel like I was in transition, but I could feel a huge sense of urgency. I started praying and telling my body to slow down and not dilate until we were at the hospital.
I had made prayer cards for each stage of labor and hubby, the consummate worship leader, had planned a playlist of uplifting praise songs for my labor. I read and reread the prayers for early and active labor as he played the songs on the truck’s cd player. Both helped me to realize that I wasn’t alone and that I could rely on God through this, which was what I really wanted, to know that I had clung to God and not myself.
The shaking didn't let up. It really scared me and made it hard to relax. I would shake between contractions, but during a contraction it would stop. I didn’t know if I was relaxing enough to stop the shaking or if it was my body acknowledging the intensity of the contraction. Either way, I began to look forward to the contractions because they meant a break from shaking.
On the drive to the hospital I was able to really zone out. I watched the white lines pass by during contractions and it was almost hypnotic. The worship music filled the car and I would often stare at the moon during contractions to help me relax. As we finally passed the airport, I relaxed even more. I told my body to start dilating because we were close enough to be safe.
Around 2 am, we got parked in front of the ER and I found a wheelchair so I could ride up to the third floor. The wheelchair felt small and unable to hold my weight. I kept asking hubby if it was okay, and he reassured me that it was.
Once we got to the third floor we had to wait for all the administrative stuff. We weren’t used to that at our local hospital, and it was really kind of annoying. Finally, we made it to the triage room, where the nurse was very accommodating and allowed us to do whatever we needed. She checked my cervix, and I was only dilated 3cms. I had told myself that if I wasn’t at 5 cms, I would leave and go labor in a nearby hotel. But, I couldn’t bear the thought of walking. I told the nurse that we would probably leave. She told us to just hang out and see how it went, while she got her initial fetal heart strip. It took awhile to get comfortable and to get the monitors situated. The nurse was so pleasant and patient. She let me stand or sit or lie, whichever was the most comfortable.
When she told me that I was only dilated 3cms, I felt a surge of disappointment. I knew that that meant early labor, and I didn’t want to be admitted until active labor. However, the moment passed quickly when I logically assessed the situation. I had told my body to stop dilating, and I knew that had to account for something. My contractions were too intense and close together to be early labor.
My mom and dad showed up around 3 am, which was a surprise. We had called them to tell them we were on our way, but to wait until we knew more before they came. I am so glad my mom didn’t listen to me. As soon as she got there, I just wanted her to touch me. Her hands were so small and light, and they felt cool on my arms, shoulders and face. My hubby’s hands were big and heavy felt better massaging my feet or back.
I got into the shower for a little while, but it didn’t really help. I tried to get comfortable. I tried standing, leaning, and sitting. I finally got comfortable in the rocking chair. I felt a definite pop and it took me a few seconds to realize what it was. In a shaky voice, I said “I think my water broke.” I stood up, just to be sure. Yep. Water gushed down my legs.
At that point, we finally realized that we would be admitted. It was around 3:30 am. The nurse began to look at my veins for an IV. She looked for several minutes, but couldn’t find any, so she called the anathesiologist. By this time, I was curled up in bed, still shaking on and off. My husband would cover me with blankets to stop the shaking, then I’d get hot and throw them off.
My mom’s phone kept ringing, and she would take her hands off of me to answer. It was always my dad or my sister, checking my progress. I told my mom to stop taking calls, because I needed her to touch me. My sister was on the line at the time and said to my mom “She’s getting snappy, she must be in transition.”
The contractions were very intense now. I could feel them building and coming one after another. I told myself that I was in transition. I knew from my failed vbac attempt that my worst enemy was myself. I HAD to keep control of my thoughts. I would not allow myself to think thoughts like “This is horrible. I can’t do this. I’m going to die.” I told myself over and over, “Amy will be here soon. One more contraction. You can do this.”
The anathesiologist finally showed up around 4: 15. Dr.T also came by and told him that he’d be down the hall with another patient, and would check back after the IV was in. The doctor tried and tried to get a vein, but couldn’t find one. He was so sweet and gentle. I was able to relax and not let him get in my way. After more than five sticks (I lost count), he finally found one and got me hooked up to the antibiotics for group B strep.
Dr.T came in and was ready to check me around 5 am. When he checked, I was more than 9cms dilated, and he manually dilated me the rest of the way. I told him that I was ready for a paracervical block. He said “You don’t have any cervix for me to give you one.”
“Okay, so give me some narcotics.” I said. I had told myself going into this that it would be okay to take meds if I needed them. The ******l birth was more important to me than it being unmedicated. An epidural was out, because I hate those since they always have to dig around. But, I knew that a bit of narcotics could get me calmed down.
Dr.T said “If I give you narcotics, your baby will be born drugged. I’m not giving you narcotics. You are about to deliver this baby.”
After that was a rush of movement. Dr.T started telling everybody to hurry up. I was still in the triage room, I hadn’t even been admitted yet. He kept saying “We have to get her to a room, unless you want her to deliver here.”
I told Dr.T , “I can’t walk to a room!”
“Okay, hon, we’ll roll you there.” He said.
They rolled the bed through the hallway at racecar speed. I could feel a breeze and it was nice and calming. I watched the beige ceiling tiles pass above my head, and I couldn’t believe that I was going to have a baby.
When we got into the delivery room, the nurses kept trying to get Dr.T to stick an internal monitor onto the baby’s head. He told them to back off, that we were able to get good sounds from the external and that we didn’t need it. He told me to hold my knees close to my ears, and I moaned, “I can’t do it!” He said “Yes! You can.”
I got my knees up and held on. I kept remembering what other moms told me. Everything hurt, but the pain would be over if I just pushed this baby out. It took a few tries to get the hang of it. Dr.T was going perineal massage, and that hurt like heck, but it helped me focus on where to push.
I don’t remember much about pushing, other than I was totally in my own world. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and I wanted it to stop. I think someone mentioned that they saw the head, but I wasn’t paying attention. I was pushing, pushing, pushing. Finally, I felt the ring of fire and I gave a huge push. The baby came out in one quick motion, all slippery and gushy. Dr.T didn’t even have to deliver the shoulders, they delivered themselves!
I collapsed back onto the bed in a complete daze. My husband had the biggest grin on his face and kept saying “You did it! You did it!” I would reply “No, I didn’t!” because none of it seemed real. I was so tired. More tired and overwhelmed than with any of the c-sections. I laid there and wondered if it was worth it. I didn’t feel proud or ecstatic. I just felt tired.
Dr.T cleaned up the baby, but I couldn’t hold her because of the meconium. He told me to kiss her before he gave her to nurses, but she was all gooey, so I just made a kissy face instead. The nurses were taking forever, and I kept begging for my baby. Finally Dr.T went over to them and told them to give me the baby. The nurses were so belligerent and I was not in the mood to deal with power trips. I told my husband to go over and take the baby. He started walking over there, and the nurse handed me the baby. She was so heavy, 10lbs 2oz.
The birth was amazing. But at the time, I was so tired and completely, physically exhausted that I really didn’t think it was worth it. It took 24 hours before I truly got excited about what had happened. I, a big fat woman of 300lbs, had given birth to a 10lb2oz baby who was born in a posterior position, after three c-sections. YEAH!!
It wasn’t me. God was with me the whole time, and I knew that it was His work and not mine.
1:21 PM - Nov. 17, 2008 -
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Thank you so much for posting that story - it was beautiful~
I am about to have my 5th c-section (well, in March) and yet I am always happy to read about moms who are able to break out of the "norm" and accomplish those VBACs. Also moms who are informed enough to realize the nurses aren't always right!!
Thanks again~
Lori
www.michiganmomma.blogspot.com
Anonymous - 10:27 AM - Nov. 18, 2008
Awesome
I've got goosebumps. You really know how to tell a compelling story. Such an amazing testimony.
Sheri aka kitchenmaid - 12:04 PM - Nov. 18, 2008
Thanks for making me cry today
Totally balled tears of joy. God is good to those He loves.
Annoying Newlywed - 2:36 PM - Nov. 18, 2008
Your story
I've been waiting to hear your birth story. What a wonderful story of faithfulness of our Father. I had a c-section at the doctor's advice on this last baby. With my insurance you get whichever midwife and doctor is there at the hospital. All the doctor's say that they don't like to recommend c-sections - but with that statistic of 1/3 of pregnancies resulting in c-sections - it does make you wonder.
basketflat - 2:48 PM - Nov. 19, 2008
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Wonderful!
My first child was in an awquard position, we were having a home birth. The midwives said I would die, we trusted God. I had the baby in hospital, as I was rushed in at the last hour. I delivered immedietly. They said if I was in hospital earlier, they would have tried to push for c section.
I just had 9, and that was tricky, all the operating rooms were taken. praise the Lord!
God bless you
fruitbuns - 6:31 PM - Nov. 19, 2008
Awesome testimony-God is able!!
I had three csections, and I was feeling depressed like I am now doomed to csections. Thanks for giving me hope that God is surely able to do this for me as he has done it for you. Thanks.
Edited by momofsix on Nov. 19, 2008 at 8:45 PM
momofsix - 9:38 PM - Nov. 19, 2008
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Ok...I started getting nervous during the part where you were driving to the hospital and the contractions were coming and I KNEW you made it to the hospital. Your story will be a blessing to all who read it. I continue to rejoice for you and for God's faithfulness.
Marinda
Anonymous - 1:33 PM - Nov. 20, 2008
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That's a beautiful birth story!
Heather Wawa - 11:55 PM - Nov. 20, 2008
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Awesome story!! You did it.
Don't you feel like you can do anything in the world now?! Congratulations.
Jamie, blog lurker and former birth assistant/doula :)
Anonymous - 12:24 AM - Nov. 21, 2008
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WOW! That was so great. Thank you for sharing! I felt like I was with you through the entire story!!! GO G-O-D!!!
Jamerrill
Nurs4jc - 10:37 AM - Nov. 22, 2008
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First your utube made me cry and then your blog. I am so happy for your successful vbac!!!
You are awesome!
I am SO proud of you!!!!
I am sitting here with chills ALL over and tears flowing.((((HUGS))) to you my hero! :)
Love you,
Chas
momachasity - 6:48 AM - Nov. 24, 2008
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WOW Beth! You are so much braver than I am. I am so happy that you were able to have a VBAC, I know passionate you were about having one. Little Amy is so precious, she makes me want to have another. Maybe one day I will catch up w/ ya and have number five.
Hope
Anonymous - 1:57 PM - Dec. 1, 2008
Yay!
I'm so glad you got the ******l delivery you wanted! Doing the happy dance for you!!!
Carletta
www.successful-homeschooling.blogspot.com
Jazzy - 9:37 PM - Dec. 3, 2008
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Ack! I got bleeped. I didn't post a bad word, just a description of the type of delivery you had. :)
Jazzy - 9:39 PM - Dec. 3, 2008
VBACing
Thank you so much for your birth story. I recently posted an entry on my blog about attempting a VBAC after 2CS and someone sent me the link to your blog.
Tears just ran down my face as I read your story. Thanks for the encouragement and the reminder of the God we serve! Please keep us in your prayers as we make this journey. My due date is July 30, 2009.
Neet - 8:39 PM - Jan. 9, 2009
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