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Dec. 30, 2007
Willing to Pay the Price?
The following article is one I had formerly written, and I am posting it again due to a reader request. But, at the same time, I had also been thinking this was appropriate for the New Year.
Our family has been studying through the books of I Samuel through II Chronicles. My husband is writing wonderful family devotions. I have been inspired to read these wonderful historical books again, with new eyes for the spiritual wisdom they contain.
Would you believe it--something jumped out at me! God HATED the wickedness of the kings who sacrificed their children to "Molech." It was so vile to Him--the kings and the people who literally burned their children as burnt offerings, thinking they were doing what "god" wanted them to do.
What kind of sacrifice does God actually want from you? Now? Today? He wants YOU!
I beseech you therefore brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of God. Romans 12:1-2
And how does He want you to make that sacrifice? By NOT BEING CONFORMED TO THIS WORLD!
This scripture is the perfect lead-in to the following article. You see, people today are sacrificing their children to the world because they are unwilling to make themselves a living sacrifice unto God. What is your choice? Sacrifice your children, or yourself?
Are You Willing to Pay the Price?
A mother once pulled me aside to ask me for help with her rebellious daughter. She was desperate to change her situation. She said she had observed our family and wanted to "do what we do." I warned her that changing her daughter wouldn't be easy. I told her she had to be 100% committed.
"Anything! I'll do anything!" she assured me.
So I explained to her the drastic things that would need to be done to change her daughter's heart.
I explained about cutting her off from her friends, her TV, movies, books, magazines, hip hop music, and any other polluting influences. Not just grounding. Not just limiting. Completely eliminating these influences. I explained that it needed to be permanent, complete, and with no compromise. I explained that if she wasn't serious about eliminating those influences, how was her daughter going to believe it was a serious problem? (If you have cancer, you don't just cut away a little part of it--you take it all!) That means none of these things for mom, either.
I explained about the need to spend all available time with the daughter, talking, teaching, training, and explaining. All the time possible--so for mom, that means no time to herself for now (mom must make a sacrifice). No internet, no TV, no anything that keeps her daughter "left to herself." Cook together, read the Bible together, talk about what God wants and why.
I explained about the need to purge the home of ungodly things. You can't tell your daughter not to read certain magazines or books, then read them yourself. You can't tell your daughter to leave the room while you watch a certain show or movie.
I explained that whatever you want your daughter to be, you have to be TWICE that in example and testimony.
And I explained again, that most parents aren't willing to pay the price. And I told her about some wonderful, Godly resources where she could learn more.
But by this time I had already lost her. It was already too much.
This has happened other times. Mothers get to know me, they confide in me, the relationship builds for a few months. They try something here, and a little change there. I encourage gently, answer questions gently. I only give counsel when asked. But usually the big question comes. They want it all. They're ready to do it "my way." They think I'm going to give them some magic formula where they can implement some one-time trick or discipline, then everything will be okay. But when they hear that godly child training must be lived day in and day out, and that a home must be Christ centered with no polluting or worldly influences... they lose the eager interest. They fear losing things they love--their comforts, indulgences, their TV shows, the little things they have decided are "okay" because they enjoy them.
Parents are not willing to make the sacrifice.
I know there are parents out there who are willing to pay the price. I've met some, and they have been a great (I mean GREAT) encouragement to me. But it is discouraging how often I am asked for counsel by people who see the example of our family and ask for advice, but they are not willing to change their own habits. They are not willing to give up their TV, their rated R movies, their yucky books, their laziness, their anger, their impatience... Women are not willing to give up their independence and their attitudes towards their husbands, their bad stewardship, their stuff (shopping, buying, collecting, worldly stuff, stuff, stuff!)... A million different things. It's like they are somehow looking for a way to raise beautiful, perfect, godly children without having to make any sacrifices, do any work, or be godly themselves. They want one foot in the Bible and one in the world--the best of both? Not possible--not according to God.
It doesn't work that way!
Be ye not conformed to this world.
I try to explain that it doesn't happen overnight. That you have to start somewhere. I try to break it down into little pieces, give starting points, small suggestions. I try to encourage, tell them to take small steps, to call me for support... But the bottom line is, many parents have already grown up themselves being all about "me." And they are now raising kids that are all about "me." And no one wants to pay the price to break the cycle. No one wants to be the living sacrifice. No one wants to sacrifice "me."
I understand, too, that there is a certain amount of preparation that must be done by the Holy Spirit in order for someone to grasp the truth, grasp the magnitude of our call to Holy living. God knows that I didn't comprehend this truth for years and years, and I know it is only by God's grace and His outpouring of the Holy Spirit on me that I was able to have ears to hear. Some people just aren't there yet. Many times when I counsel, it is easy to discern when someone isn't there yet, and isn't ready. You don't give meat to a baby--you give milk.
But how many moms are out there clamoring and pleading and praying and wishing for their children to grow up as strong, godly men and women... but they aren't willing to pay the price?
Yes, I know God is providential. And believe me, I'm not judging. Women who are asking for help know they need it. Satan's strongholds are tremendous. I pray against them for all my blog readers and my friends continually. If you have emailed me for counsel, or even left a comment, you are in my fervent prayers for God's help, God's grace, and God's outpouring of wisdom and mercy as you undertake your calling to be a godly wife and mother. Keep praying! God is so gracious and so good. He will answer. He will do the work. You won't even have to do the work. He will do it! He can change your heart and the hearts of your children, and transform your home and your children. Just keep praying! Keep asking. Keep asking for God to do what it takes in your heart and in your life to be all that He wants you to be. He will do it.
My children are not rebellious (at the moment), but I still am committed to paying the price. I only get one chance with them. I can get my internet time later (ha! what are they doing now, you ask? The 13-year-old is playing Legos with the baby, and my 8-year-old daughter is reading her library books--books I approved, of course).
But, now I must go and put them in bed. And put me in bed.
And as I go to bed, I know this post is is going to step on toes. I just know it. I was there once, too. And, like someone did for me once--called me out on my selfishness and laziness--I just wanted to write it down. You see, God prepared my heart by calling me to repentance. I had to be broken first. I had to realize the problem was me. Not my husband. Not my children. I had to make MY life the living sacrifice.
Moms--just pray for a change of heart! You may not feel like it--but pray to want it (if you don't want it). I know what it's like to hate change. I hate giving up certain parts of me that God demands. And when I don't want to--I pray for God to make me want to, and I pray for the change of heart.
In my life, there was a point where by God's grace I realized that there was only ONE solution for my problems--as a woman, as a wife, as a mother. His truth. Hearing it and doing it.
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Epilogue:
As I sit here facing the New Year, I have asked God what He wants from me. One thing He made very clear: I am to be a living sacrifice--especially regarding raising the children He has entrusted to me. I will be willing to pay the price, and I have told Him that this coming year, I will do all I have been doing and even more to make sure my children are not sacrificed to this world, but that I am a living sacrifice to God.
That means:
Patiently listening to my rambling 13-year-old son.
Sitting for hours to help my 8-year-old daughter learn her crocheting and knitting.
When my 2-1/2 year-old son cries, "Mommy, I want you!" and lifts his arms to me, I will smile back at him and say, "I want you, too!" and pick him up for a big hug and kiss.
Speaking to my children without anger, praising them, exhorting them, guiding them, giving firm authority, loving guidance, and continual encouragement.
Working to train them in all areas of their lives--even when I may not feel like it: Helping them learn their chores better, be more diligent in their school work, growing them in character.
And being consistent with their training, even if it means I have to hang up the internet, the phone, or put down my own book and get my behind up off my chair...
Sacrifice.
See the name of my blog? Living Sacrifice. That is my prayer this year. That I will truly become that living sacrifice to my Lord and Savior. Jesus Christ is Lord. |
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