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Oct. 10, 2009
How it's going: Toddler Training
We've got a LOT going on these days. There's no way I could possibly share it all, but I want to share some of the goodness of God.
I've learned one of the reasons why God considers children a blessing: now that I have five, I am definitely praying more. I need Him more! I need His help more! That is certainly a blessed place to be--any time God puts me in a place where I need Him more so that I must grow closer, I must grow stronger... Praise God.
Oh, how my prayers have increased over caring for my two littlest. My 20-month-old is a willful terror and must be constantly managed or safely contained. His training is quite the project. He is a whirlwind. Just picture the Tasmanian Devil from Bugs Bunny and that's what I feel like I'm trying to tame. Do you know how hard it is to correct him effectively and consistently, say, for screeching in defiance, when he does it 20 times in 30 seconds?
But I am learning and growing. And so are my two oldest (15 and 10)--because they have been such a great help to me. I have been teaching the oldest through my best efforts, but also through my mistakes. For example, we were at the mall to pick up my daughter's new eyeglasses. We had two strollers--one for the newborn, and one for the 20-month-old. He kept screeching (earsplitting banshee-like) when he was told not to touch something, or if we didn't let him get out of his stroller, or if we didn't push him when he wanted to go, or... for any other reason. I dropped the ball. I ineffectively corrected him--little hand swats, verbal admonishments, placing my finger over his mouth..nothing serious, and he knew it. He didn't quit. He barely toned it down for a short time, only to screech again. He knew he didn't have to quit. I had proven to him I wasn't serious about it and wasn't going to correct him. He pushed the boundary.
After we left the mall and got in the car, I confessed to my daughter that I did not train him properly. If I had been serious about correcting him for screeching, at the first screech, I don't care how inconvenient, I would have turned around, walked out of the mall to the car, and corrected him properly, and it would have been over at that point. I told her he still screeches because I continue to be too lazy. He screeches in defiance so much, and I don't come running to discipline him every time--because I'm nursing, or upstairs doing laundry... and I'm just too lazy to put down what I'm doing, or to go upstairs, or downstairs.. I told her that if I did it right, we could have the problem handled by now. I pointed out that when I do correct him quickly and properly for the screeching, he quits instantly and doesn't try it again for some time. I just keep dropping the ball.
But screeching is just the tip of the iceberg. He refuses to sit in his high chair, he refuses to cooperate with just about anything--getting dressed, going potty, cleaning up (so willful!), he loves to throw things, run away when called, get into the school desks, get into my purse... you get the picture! I have seen improvements. We are making progress--both him and me. I am learning to be more patient, calm, loving, and consistent. I am thankful. He is testing the boundaries less and less--but my lack of consistency is still dragging things out longer than necessary.
The Lord has shown me some wonderful things and grown me in some ways I needed to grow. For example, I had prayed recently for God to teach me more and grow me in the area of fasting. The verse on fasting in Matthew had really been coming to mind a lot for me. It says, "
Moreover, when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face; that thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.
Matthew 6:16-18
From that verse, it seems that Jesus expects us to fast, but doesn't say when, or how often, or why. I prayed for God to show me when, how often, why... to just show me how to grow in this area. I didn't want to read anything written by men, or consider any teachings I have heard. I just wanted to hear what God had to say.
Well, one night, I was lying on my bed and praying before I fell asleep. The day had been a whirlwind of toddler training, newborn nursing, spiritual training and school for the older children, plus the usual mountain of chores and caring for husband and home. I said, "Lord, I need to learn how to walk in the spirit more! What can I do to stay in the spirit and stay dead to self?
He said, "Fast!"
I said, "Duh!"
Prayer answered. I looked up all the references on fasting and read them in this light and was so blessed! My toddler training took on a new life, with added hope and help from my Lord.
Not to mention, I am so grateful for my husband, who is such a great father and a help, and my two older children, who have been an incredible help. I am blessed.
And in the meantime, I will press on, like I always have. I know my calling--to train these children in the ways of the Lord. Each day I will get up, and I will not be weary in well-doing, and I will press on!
God bless! |
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