My husband and I started going to church when we had been married for almost a year. We started going because we were very unhappy in our marriage. The first year really was the hardest. Anyway, we were having a hard time and it just wasn't getting better. One day my dad said, "You've tried everything else, why don't you go to church. It could help." The lady I was working for at the time had invited me to her church several times and so we finally went. (that's where I met Lisa!)

Well, I thought I was already a Christian because I was a pretty good person as far as people go (I thought). So, I was mainly going so that God could fix my husband and then we could finally be happy. I prayed and prayed that Tommy would be saved and it just wasn't happening. One morning after church I was crying and the pastor came over to talk to us. I told him that my husband was lost and poor Tommy was sitting there feeling pretty cruddy. Tony (the pastor) asked him about it and Tommy said, "I don't feel like I need to be saved. I mean, I'm not a bad person. I don't rape or kill people. I don't steal from people. I'm not a bad person. I don't understand what the problem is." So then Tony started to explain that without faith in Christ we are all in the same boat, murderers and rapists and just average guys like Tommy, they are all the same if they haven't accepted Christ as their Savior. I don't think Tommy was convinced at that point. Tony prayed for us and we went home. I'm not sure how long it was after that, but I decided I needed to be baptized and the night I was Baptized, Tommy was saved. It was awesome!

After that we started getting involved in the church. I taught Sunday school and lead the children's choir. We taught in Bible school. I helped start a Christian school. I prayed all the time and read my Bible every day. I witnessed to everyone I came in contact with (I was a bit irritating). But the whole time I was scared to death. I was so afraid that I wasn't doing enough. I wasn't praying enough or reading my Bible enough. I wasn't working hard enough in the church. Iwas so afraid that I just wasn't good enough to make it. I don't know how many of you have ever been in a Southern Baptist church but those of you who have know that almost every service is ended with an invitation. The preacher asks everyone to bow their heads and close their eyes and then he asks, "If Jesus were to come back right now would you be ready to meet Him?"  Well every time that happened I sat there like a "good Christian" with a smile on my face nodding my head, that yes, I was ready to go. But on the inside I was terrified. I kept praying that the Lord would not come back now because I was sure I was not good enough to go with Him. It went on like that for years. I was miserable.

The only thing I know to compare it to is this; Imagine that your mortgage is due (it's the biggest bill I can think of) and you don't have the money to pay it. You've counted up every penny you have...even what you could find in the couch and you still are way short. So the bank has called and they're taking the house if you can't pay them today. You've asked everyone you know and no one else has that kind of money either. So you know, there is no doubt, that it is impossible for you to pay the debt and you have lost your house. But even though you know that, there is still this frantic activity in your head. You're still trying to figure out a way to do it. That's how I felt all the time. I knew there was no way I was good enough to be accepted by God. But I was wearing myself out trying to be. I prayed and prayed. I begged God to save me. But I never believed that he had...or would. That prayer that everyone says, "The Sinner's Prayer", I can't even count how many times I said that. Like it was some kind of magic spell that would suddenly change everything. But it just didn't happen. My husband, who preaches about the love and grace of God better than anyone I've ever heard, tried to explain to me that it was all about God's grace. He tried to tell me that I could never be good enough, no matter how hard I tried. That's why Jesus, the perfect, sinless, Son of God had to die for my sins. He was good enough so that I don't have to be. He paid for my sins with his life, so that I didn't have to. When I finally understood that, it was .... well there aren't words to describe how it felt. Remember the analogy of the mortgage that couldn't be paid? Now imagine how you would feel if your husband came home from work and saw you there, so upset and still trying to figure out how to come up with the money to save your house. He asks what's wrong and you tell him. Then He's hugs you and says, "Honey, it's paid already. As a matter of fact, it's paid off. We never have to make another payment again!" Imagine your relief. Imagine your joy and excitement. That is how I felt when I realized that Jesus had paid the debt for my sin. I never have to make another payment.. I only have to trust that it's paid. That's how I was saved.

How about you?

Here's the problem:

All have sinned (Romans 3:23) this means every person ever born (except Jesus Christ, Hebrews 4:15) has sinned.

The wages of sin is death (Romans 6: 23a) The only payment for sin is death, If you have to pay for even one sin, the payment is death. (it's why animals were sacrificed in the old testament)

Here is the solution:

But God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us,. (Romans 5:8)

The last part of Romans 6:23 says, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. (John 3:16)

You can't earn it.

For by grace are ye saved  through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast. (Ephesians 2:8-9)