La Dolce Vita

• Saturday, March 1, 2008 - Character Development Days

It has been a character development week. For the kids. For me. Since the Lord opened my eyes regarding my tone and attitude, I have noticed a marked improvement in my day. Previous to this, I was getting sucked into whining back at the kids, responding to their bad choices with frustration instead of correction, and just generally not being the intentional parent I want to be. This week has been better. Although their whining has continued, mine has not. Their misbehavior has been met with firm correction. I have been much more thoughtful and intentional in my parenting. Periodically, it seems we go through this refocusing in our house. We move along in life at a pretty good clip, parenting well, and then we veer off course. Just slightly off course, but enough that when ignored for a period of weeks, end up being far from where we want to be. A variety of things knock us off-illness, a vacation, too many activities, in this case-having a baby and moving shortly after. When the kids were little, this refocusing was much tougher on me..by the end of a day full of discipline, I found myself exhausted, maybe even a little teary, at all the conflict. By nature, I'm a conflict avoider, so these intensive times of redirection are hard on me. A couple of years ago, though, I had a revelation (God is so good to give us insights at just the right time!) that these days of conflict weren't bad days (my perception), but were character development days, both for me and for the kids. Since that time, when I find my little family back in one of these high discipline seasons, I have found it a bit easier to endure with grace, I find I am more peaceful and loving as I correct my kids. I see them less as adversaries, and more as young people who need me to help them grow in character-God is using me as a tool to chisel at their character. And that's my job....to raise them in the ways of the Lord.

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