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Nathan's Adventures

Oct. 23, 2008

Chapter Two, fight with them

Okay.So nathan is in a x-wing [red nine] justan is in an a-wing [red seven] kevan is in a v-wing[red six]. "We are heading towards an imperial base right?"says justan."Yes we are, and it's the most powerful base in the galaxy since the second death star has been destroyed"said nathan."So we are going to switch are missiles to seeker missles? said kevan." Yes we are going to have to do it" says nathan.beep beep beep beep." We are getting close to the planet now,make sure that your blasters are on the fastest lazers posible"says nathan."Help! my wing is hit! says kevan". "I can't see any tie fighters...yikes! now I am hit! says justan. "I see it, it is a tie enterceptor!"nathan says."Fire seeker torpedoe!"nathan.

Will they destroy the tie enterceptor? Will they make it to the planet in time?        See chapter three!

 

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Comments

Oct. 23, 2008 - Good chapter!

Posted by AndiCarter
Hey, this is a good chapter! Lots of action and fighting and excitement. What you need to start doing, to make it easier for readers is to make some paragraphs. When a new character starts talking, push "enter" so you can start a new paragraph. That way it doesn't run together.

See example:

Okay.So nathan is in a x-wing [red nine] justan is in an a-wing [red seven] kevan is in a v-wing[red six].

"We are heading towards an imperial base right?"says justan.

"Yes we are, and it's the most powerful base in the galaxy since the second death star has been destroyed"said nathan.

"So we are going to switch are missiles to seeker missles? said kevan."

Yes we are going to have to do it" says nathan.

beep beep beep beep." We are getting close to the planet now,make sure that your blasters are on the fastest lazers posible"says nathan.

"Help! my wing is hit! says kevan".

"I can't see any tie fighters...yikes! now I am hit! says justan.

"I see it, it is a tie enterceptor!"nathan says."Fire seeker torpedoe!"nathan.

Will they destroy the tie enterceptor? Will they make it to the planet in time?
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Oct. 25, 2008 - Very Cool!

Posted by earthenvessel
Can't tell that you like Starwars at all! ;o) I have a 7 year old boy who also loves Starwars. Also have a 10 year old boy and an 8 year old girl.
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Oct. 27, 2008 - From Justan

Posted by NathansAdventures
Come and read my Batman Against the Joker story.
It's at the Batcave.
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These are the adventures of Nathan. I am 9 years old and I homeschool.

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