Nov. 11, 2009 - Today's Writing Assignment
Sometimes, you have to laugh at the tough stuff in life just to stay sane. Other times, kids present you with something so ridiculously funny that you don't have to work up a good attitude...you have to work at getting a breath in between the giggles.
Nov. 11, 2009 - Mad as a hornet
You all are not even going to believe this one.
We got to the hospital and got settled in, then headed off for a BUNCH of procedures in the treatment room. Noah had to get cathed instead of getting a bag urine specimen because he has had gram negative bugs grow in his urine in the past and we had to be sure we had a sterile specimin in case the gram negatives in his blood had come from a UTI. It is unbelievably hard to cath him, and he is usually sedated in the ER for this. Up on the floor they can't do sedation, but he did get some ativan to help a little.
Noah has a very tight foreskin which means that they are just working blind when trying to cath him. After almost 30 minutes of true agony the ID doctor came in and told us that she had called the lab in Greenwood to ask some more questions about his culture. Turns out that, "oh, oops" Noah is NOT growing gram negative anything. Oops. His culture is growing a gram positive bacteria that is almost always the result of a contaminated specimen - in other words, the bacteria almost certainly isn't in his blood stream at all but is due to a speck of dust.
ID said that we could go home. Like I keep saying, Noah doesn't really look bad. They stopped trying to cath him but did have to go ahead and get peripheral cultures (blood out of his arm), broviac cultures, and a bunch of other labs - but since he's looking OK we were given the go-ahead to go home and watch him with the understanding that if gets worse OR the new cultures grow something, then we come right back.
In the meantime, my baby was truly and literally tortured for 30 minutes because somebody wasn't paying attention to his or her work in a lab somewhere. Even the really seasoned and always calm nurses were traumatized by watching Noah go through this. It was horrible.
So, yeah, I'm feeling a little conflicted right now. I'm truly thrilled and stunned that we are going home, and I am heartsick and furious that Noah had to suffer like that for nothing. He was in that room in pain for just short of an hour total. He is covered in petechial hemorraging (little burst blood vessels all over from the screaming) and looks like he'll have bruises all over his thighs from being held while he fought so hard. His little boy parts are raw and hurting. Even when we were trying to do "no ouchie" procedures, he was so traumatized and terrified that he was screaming and shaking.
All because of a mistake. This would have been agony enough if we had truly needed to do this, but it is unbearable to know that he didn't need to go through this. Anybody need an object lesson for your children on why it is important to always do our best and always pay attention????
To top it all off, Noah just got a new Thomas DVD. He was holding it in the car on the way here and had a meltdown because the package contained an ad for some new Thomas that you put in a tunnel and fix or something. He decided he had to have that toy right now (sound like a three year old?). Jeff and I were trying to calm him down and making a mental note to try and find this toy for Christmas or something. Well, the Child Life worker brought that new Thomas DVD into the treatment room for Noah to watch. It had a commercial for the toy, of course. When we were done and ready to leave the room, I told Noah it was time to go to the prize box - and in the next breath said "Oh, and let's get your new Thomas too." I MEANT let's grab the new DVD so we don't forget it, but Noah thought that the new TOY was going to be in the prize box. Let's just say I am no longer a contender for the Mother of the Year award. Talk about adding insult to injury - and I was so shocked by the news of the lab error that it took me a few minutes to figure out why he was sobbing instead of picking out a prize.
Fortunately Noah is very resilient and forgiving. Child Life loaded him up with goodies which he is enjoying, and he is happy that he is going home. So am I. I just want to go home and hold him and rock him and pray that he will forget this all.
We'll be leaving as soon as we get the paperwork.
Blessings,
Kate
Nov. 11, 2009 - The Outlaw of Dry Gulch
He's known as the meanest gunslinger in the west...
He took our family by surprise that day he rolled into town.
My husband tried to save his girls...
But it was no use. That outlaw was too fast for us.
It will never be safe in Dry Gulch until this fast handed desperado has been apprehended...
Nov. 11, 2009 - Reinforcements
We've called in the cavalry. My parents, who live in Michigan, are on the their way down to help out for a couple of days so Kevin can get back to work. I am SO grateful to them for coming down on short notice and exposing themselves to H1N1 in the process. Fortunately, the kids all seem over it and I'm not going to cough on them, so with God's help they may avoid contracting it themselves.
My breathing is definitely better today, what a relief! Two days ago, the Dr. found no pneumonia but prescribed steroids to lessen the lung inflammation. I think the steroids are finally kicking in and my asthma is definitely better today. I'm still exhausted to the nth degree and spend most of my time in bed. The older girls take turns bringing me food and drinks, and of course Kevin is keeping the home fires burning so that little people are fed, clothed, and put to bed at the right time.
Thanks for your continued prayers.
Nov. 11, 2009 - Noah is going to the hospital.
Hey, this is Hannah Grace (Kate's oldest daughter). I am posting for Mom because she is packing...she and Noah are heading to Greenville hospital. Dr. B got a call at 5am this morning from the labs saying that Noah's blood Gram Negative bacteria. He waited a little bit and then called us this morning. Nothing is growing from his line yet, so this bug may have come from his gut.
Noah doesn't look really bad, and we are glad that we caught this fast. In fact, that's probaly why his labs looked so good last night - because we caught this so fast. Noah has had a hard time with Gram Negative bugs in the past, and he really needs your prayers.
Mom will update when she knows more and has a chance.
~Hannah Grace
Nov. 11, 2009 - And Mama...Laughed
Yesterday will go down in infamy, at least in my oldest son's mind. I think my definition of successful parenting has change from raising perfect children to raising children who don't need extensive therapy when they're grown. Days like yesterday make me worry.
Yesterday was shots day. All three boys got one. I was not anticipating a happy time, by any means. However, one of my children went completely off his rocker when he saw the syringes. The oldest one, at that. The other two were more reasonably unpleased with events. They did the "boo-hoo...OOOOWWW!....Waaaah!" thing, and then were fine. Asrat, however, just went bonkers. That's the only way to describe it. He was yelling, jumping up and down in a corner, fighting, angry, and screaming bloody murder (and that was before the needle jab). I'm sure he could be heard all the way out in the waiting room. It took three of us to hold him and when it was through he yelled at the nurse. Needless to say, I was mortified.
But my reaction to this embarassed me too. After spending six years helping him learn to be brave (he tends to be fearful anyway), preparing for this shot and practicing controlling emotions, and then agonizingly long minutes of his over-the-top behavior in the exam room, I had exhausted all capacity for being sympathetic. I had zero soft fuzzy emotions for him at that moment. I hugged him tight and held his arms down, told him it would only hurt for a second. He still screamed the kind of scream a person would normally use when having his toenails pulled out slowly, one by one, with red-hot pincers.
And I laughed at him.
We may never go back to that office again. Between his outrageous behavior and my outrageous lack of parental empathy, I'm convinced that everybody in the office must have believed I was "one of those" parents who should have been denied a liscense to have kids. We certainly turned a lot of heads as we tried (and failed) to escape discreetly after the ruckus we'd just made.
I have confessed my motherly failure to as many people who would listen, hoping, I suppose for some assurance that I haven't scarred my son for life. Surprisingly, though, polls indicate that I am not the only parent who has done this sort of thing, and that most people don't seem to think I'm the most evil mother in the world because of it. Whew!
My mom asked me what I thought a Good Mother would have done in that situation. I realized I had been feeling so guilty because I had a truly silly image of a Good Mother in my head. A Good Mother would have gathered her insane child in her arms, and gazed into his eyes, and emanated calmness and peace with such force that he immediately calmed down, smiled, hopped up on the table and said "I'm OK now. Go ahead and stick me!". Ha! If that is a Good Mother, I guess there's no hope of me ever being one.
Like I said, at this point all I'm hoping for is that they don't spend their adulthoods filleting their souls (and my character) in a counselor's office.
Nov. 10, 2009 - He . . . . . . ISN'T!
Dr. B called right before dinner and told me that Noah's labs looked beautiful - beautiful for Noah, that is! (tired gray-haired mama doing the happy dance) We will probably re-draw labs tomorrow because sometimes it takes his labs a little while to catch up with him, but I really think that we are in the clear. One happy bonus of drawing these unscheduled labs is that we were able to see another nice jump up in his hemoglobin even since yesterday! The venofer really seems to be doing the trick for Noah. How refreshing is that?? While we were on the phone I asked Dr. B again about Noah's other issues. He reminded me that Noah was really, really, really sick and was getting massive doses of really, really, really strong drugs, and that we need to give Noah more time. (hmmmmm . . . I'm seeing a pattern here . . . everyone keeps telling me the same thing but I keep asking because I'm hoping for a different answer. Sigh.) We are going to take a "wait and see" approach and give Noah the time he needs to show us what he can do. In the meantime I can cuddle him when he is confused or scared or dizzy, and carry him when it's too hard to walk. I consider it a privilege to be able to do so. (Speaking of cuddling, Noah loves to have me sleep with him when he is in the hospital. He wants to curl right up around me like a koala bear and have his head on my shoulder. Lately he wants me to lie down with him at all sort of odd times of the day when he is weary. He doesn't want to nap but he does want that favorite snuggle position, so he will lie down on my bed, put out his arms, gaze oh-so-deeply into my eyes and say, "Sleep me?" Talk about an offer I can't refuse!)
Noah (and everyone else) thoroughly enjoyed Up. Jeff and I are going to see it tonight. Yeah, that is totally backwards for us as I can't remember the last time the children saw a movie without our screening it first or at least watching with them, but we were given the "all clear" by some very trusted friends and felt that this was a safe movie. We're watching just because we spent the afternoon cracking up at the sound of all of our children laughing so hard and we want to get in on the fun! :-)
Thank you so much for the encouraging comments. Sometimes it seems like there will never be a light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes I read blogs about kids who are facing serious issues, but they are FIXABLE issues - there may be surgery or treatment or scary things, but there is the real possibility that at the end of the day these children will be utterly whole and healthy and well. I want that chance for Noah and Eithene and Samuel and Gavin and Claire and Rafi and Mathew and Alex and Lauren and Brianna and all of the thousands of beautiful children fighting mito or other severe chronic issues. It is an amazing thing to be able to turn and bury my face under the shadow of God's wing when it all just seems to be too much. Faith is indeed the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen, and I have faith in a God who is so much bigger than me and so much bigger than mito. I've had to remind myself over and over lately that God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a strong mind. When those sudden icy darts of fear come over me, all I need to do is to remember that they didn't come from the Lord. He isn't afraid for Noah. His plans for Noah are for good. Please pray that we can keep resting in those truths.
I need to kiss Superman goodnight now, and smile and not cry, then get into bed with my super man and laugh at Up. :-) There might even be some peanut butter chocolate ice cream in Jeff's and my future - shhhhhhh . . . .
Blessings,
Kate
ps I listen to Your Hands as suggested. Yep, I shed a few tears too. I'll have to post the video here soon.
Nov. 10, 2009 - Is he, or isn't he?
Took Noah in to see Dr. B today, and lo and behold Noah decided to pop a fever while he was there. Ugh. It was pretty low-grade, so we came home and Noah's nurse drew labs here at the house. We'll know how they look in a couple of hours and Dr. B will call us with a plan at that point. We discussed Noah's other issues while we were together but didn't really dig in since the focus was on getting these labs and figuring out whether Noah is truly sick.
In the meantime, Noah's temp has gone down and he doesn't look terrible. Doesn't look good either, though. Thanks to the DVD Fairy, a brand-new copy of Up arrived today for the older children. None of them have seen it and Noah is chilling out with them and enjoying it.
I'm not even going to venture a "Mommy Radar" guess on this one. As Jessica pointed out yesterday, there is a sort of post-traumatic stress thing that happens after close calls like the one Noah had so recently. It throws my instincts off completely. All I can say is that he really doesn't look awful and his temp is down.
Right now my focus is on refusing to listen to the voice of fear that says he didn't look awful in the beginning last time either . . . .nope, just not going to listen.
The Lord was gracious and I was able to get about 50 lbs each of ground beef and boneless chicken breasts at half price today so I can restock my freezer with casseroles. I'm not sure I want to dig in and start cooking before I hear back on Noah's labs (that would be a bad project to leave half-finished!!) but I may go mix up some meatloaf to keep myself busy. It's only maybe a 30 minute project so I can finish before I hear from Dr. B.
(Free homemaking tip of the day - freezing meatloaf in bulk is the easiest thing ever. Just make your regular recipe and put into freezer bags without cooking it. Smoosh the bags as flat as possible - it will thaw faster that way - and freeze. When you want to cook meatloaf, thaw a bag, dump the meatloaf in your pan, shape, and bake. It doesn't really take any longer to mix a huge batch of meatloaf than a small one but the payoffs are big when you want an easy dinner!)
Off to cook and pray and believe that Noah is fine this time.
Kate
Nov. 10, 2009 - Take a Moment
I'm terrible sorry that we haven't been posting in a couple of week.
It’s November and everybody is busy. Powerline Productions is no exception. The test kitchens are going full tilt and the employees are running around nonstop. Meredith is gearing up for a talk at a local homeschool support group and I am preparing for a family trip to Virginia. Our college students are finishing up classes with big projects and starting to prepare for finals and our homeschool students are straining to get their work done among the distractions. This morning has been beautiful. I was able to swim a mile, enjoying the sunshine all the while. I’ve enjoyed a delicious lunch of steam asparagus and leftover baked ham roll-ups. (If you’re interested in trying them, the recipe is at the end of this blog.)
In between making a batch of chocolate turtles and a batch of truffles I had a moment to look out the window at Big Daddy, our 300 year live old oak tree and his leaves were still. I was enthralled. I couldn’t take my eyes off those beautiful green, still leaves. (Yes, I realize that an oak tree with green leaves in November might be shocking to some of you. I don’t know if it’s because we’re in Florida or because he’s a Live Oak Tree, but Big Daddy doesn’t shed his leaves until March when the new ones force the old ones out.) We are experiencing a great deal of wind in Florida today as Tropical storm/depression/whatever-their-calling-it-now Ida is wreaking havoc on the gulf. They haven’t been strong winds, just constant. I don’t think there has been a moment in days that Big Daddy has been still. The air has been some-what like my life, busy. Big Daddy and his still leaves reminded me to take a moment.
We take time to homeschool our kids and that’s good. We take time to feed our families and if you have teenage boys like me that’s very good. We take time to study The Word or Praise the Lord and that’s extremely good. How much time do we take to just be with Him? How much time do we take to consciously appreciate the gifts He has given us? It’s time to prepare a Thanksgiving feast. Then it will be time to buy gifts for everybody to show how thankful we are for the gift of God’s son. Don’t be stressed by it. Take the time you need to really be thankful, even while you’re making the preparations. Enjoy the smells of the food while it’s still cooking. Enjoy the bright colors, lights, and music of the holiday season. Keep your eyes open to see and appreciate when the wind stops blowing.
Baked Ham Roll-Ups
Ingredients
- 2 (10oz.) pkg. chopped spinach
- 2 cups corn bread stuffing mix
- 2 cups sour cream
- 24 slice ham lunchmeat
- 4 cups milk
- 4 Tbsp. cornstarch
- 4 Tbsp. butter
- 2 cups sharp grated cheese
- pepper, to taste
Directions
Preheat oven to 350ºF. Cook frozen spinach as directed on package and drain. Combine with stuffing mix and sour cream; mix well. Spread each ham slice with about ½ cup spinach mixture. Roll and place seam side down in 9x13 inch Pyrex dish. Dissolve cornstarch and milk well in saucepan and heat. Add butter, cheese, and pepper; cook till thickened. Pour over ham rolls. Bake, covered, 15 minutes, uncovered, 15 minutes.
Nov. 10, 2009 - Is Your Iron Getting Rusty?
Prov. 27:17 – “As iron sharpens iron, so one man [family] sharpens another.”
When you began your homeschool adventure, where was it that you went to ask questions, get answers, find the camaraderie of many shoulders to cry on and find out that your child wasn’t a freak because he was having trouble with his nine times-tables? Where was it that you could count on someone with experience to be there for you?
Does “support group” ring a bell to anyone?
I hate to say it, but in many areas support groups are going the way of snow in summer-time…they seem to be melting away and fading into the atmosphere. And I say, “what a shame!”
It’s come to my attention that many of our precious experienced homeschoolers are starting to drift away from attending their area support group meetings. Do they feel that they have out-grown them?
Look at it this way: if I take two pieces of rusty, dull iron – I have two pieces of rust, dull iron! J But if I rub them together, something great happens; they start to change. They become a little sharper, they become a little brighter and shinier. They become something usable. Iron can’t sharpen iron unless there is friction between the two…they have to meet together.
As I asked you in the beginning, think about when you were a new homeschooler and your child just wasn’t catching on to a concept and, at your wit’s end, you went to your homeschool support group and started asking around for help. Lo and behold! There was a wonderful, experienced mom there who had actually “been there, done that”! You went home, tried her advice and it worked!
Now…think of this: A new homeschool mom, full of hopes and dreams and fears comes to your homeschool support group. Her child just isn’t catching on to a concept and she’s at her wit’s end; and after coming to your support group she starts asking around for help. Lo and behold! Does she find it from you…OR is this one of those nights when you decided you just didn’t want to go tonight? After all, what more do YOU need to learn about homeschooling since you’ve done it for so long?
Well, what if the reason you are to STILL attend your group has changed? What if it’s now a ministry? What if the reason that new homeschool mom leaves the meeting a little sadder and a little more fearful and discouraged is because YOU weren’t there to answer her questions the way someone was there for you?
Isn’t it time for us to be there for a new generation of homeschoolers? Isn’t it time for us to share our experiences, our triumphs, our joys and even our failures with the new crowd? Isn’t that part of our Titus 2 duty? Did the Lord really make you a part of your group JUST so you could get a newsletter, go to gym or co-op or field trips, find out about curriculum sales and legislative updates? I don’t think so.
This is a new season in our lives and an opportunity to shine as examples of experienced homeschool moms!
Let’s not be a part of the “me, me, me” crowd…we’re past that. Let’s be the Lord’s hands and feet and minister to our sisters and their families and ease some of those fears and build some dreams! After all, a long time ago someone cared enough to be there for you. Now it’s your turn.
Blessings,
Kim Wolf<><
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