Sep. 12, 2008 - The "Why" Series: Modest Apparel
When I first became a mother, the physical work was difficult but the emotional investment was easy. What’s not to love about a cuddly newborn. As the children grow, the job of motherhood has become a little more difficult. Oh sure, the physical demands are easier because the children have become more self-sufficient, but the questions, the decisions…those are the things that have gotten harder.
It is for this reason that the WHY series was born. I hope to write a series of studies on the ‘whys’ in our life. It is these whys that define our Christian walk in this world and yet are so misunderstood by Christians in general. Things like, why do we wear only dresses? Why are you encouraging and training your daughters to keep a home and discouraging college? Why don’t we attend movie theaters? Why is todays ‘christian’ music not pleasing to the Lord?” “Why live separate from the world?” WHY?
You see, I’ve realized lately that my convictions are not necessarily going to be my children’s convictions. They need to be taught why we believe the things that we do so that they can make wise choices. While they are under our roof, they will have to abide by our rules but what is going to carry them along in those convictions when they leave our home? Besides prayer and a right relationship with the Lord, it will be knowing why our family believes what God says in his Word - and he does indeed have something to say about all of these subjects.
So welcome to my first installment of….
I. Deut. 22:5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so [are] abomination unto the LORD thy God.
I can almost see the eye rolls and hear the sighs when I quote this verse. “Surely, you aren’t going to go there!” Sorry sister, I’m going there. No better place to start than at the beginning.
“The woman shall not wear that which pertained unto a man” Yes, yes, I know, that’s the Old Testament. As if that should excuse us from giving heed to it.
Romans 7:7 says "What shall we say then? [Is] the law sin? God forbid. Nay, I had not known sin, but by the law: …"
If we didn’t have the law, we would have no knowledge of sin. The law is necessary both for our salvation and our Christian living. God’s Word (the AV 1611 King James Bible) clearly tells us that women who wear those things that pertain to a man are an abomination to God.
That word abomination is a very serious word that means extreme hatred; loathing. God feels very seriously about the way we women dress - it’s nothing to take lightly.
Now I am not about to get into a lengthy study on the various garments of Bible times. As far as I’m concerned, it is irrelevant. The Bible plainly tells us not to dress like men. Have you ever once considered the origin of women wearing pants? How about a little history lesson, shall we?
The introduction of women wearing pants didn’t come about till early in the 20th century. For six thousand years, women wore long, flowing robes or dresses. It wasn’t until women entered the work force that they also donned men’s garments. Ironic that when women decided to rebel against God, step out from under the headship of their fathers or husbands and compete with men in the work force, that they began dressing like men! Sort of a two-for-one rebellion. (an interesting article on the history of dress can be found here.
The word for garment in this verse is ‘simlah’ which means a dress, especially a mantle. According to Easton’s Bible Dictionary, a mantle means a loose flowing robe. I know, I know, you don’t like that, do you? I’m sorry - it’s all there in black and white for you to research yourself if you’d like.
II. I Timothy 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Oh good, we’re in the New Testament now. I’m sorry sister, it doesn’t get much better for your britches in the NT either. Let’s start by defining a few words. We probably all think that we know what ‘modest’ means but it’s nearly unfathomable just how far we’ve come as a society from the true meaning of that world.
Modest means not forward or bold; not lewd; moderate; not excessive or extreme. After reading the definition, you might just breath a sigh of relief and say “well, my blue jeans certainly make the cut.” Not so fast J Moving on to apparel, which is defined as clothing; vesture; dress. Nice and generic until you dig just a bit deeper. The word for ‘apparel’ in the KJB is katastole which means a letting down…of dress. Last I checked, you didn’t ‘let down’ a pair of pants - you pulled them up. Also in Gill’s commentary on the Bible, he states that “the word rendered apparel signifies a long robe which reaches to the feet. My, how far we’ve come!
III. So what is modest?
We can easily see from the above verses that the wearing of pants and even ‘culottes’ are not considered by the Lord to be modest but you know what, that doesn’t automatically assume that all dresses are modest either. I’ve seen women come to church in dresses that made be blush. So establishing that women should dress like women and not men isn’t enough to cover the subject of modesty. See, there is an interesting verse in the Bible that says:
Proverbs 7:10 And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.
Let’s take a few moments to examine these two phrases. First, the attire of an harlot. She must be wearing something different from the decent women of her day because her clothing defined her. What does a harlot wear? I’m sure that through the years, her clothing has changed but the purpose of those articles have not changed. A harlot:
1. Dresses to draw attention to herself
2. Accentuates parts of her body so that men will lust after her.
3. Dresses to be desired and sought after
If those three things don’t describe how most of our young American women dress these days, I don’t know what does. Mama, what are you thinking allowing your daughters to go about dressed like harlots with their shirts so tight you can see the outline of their undergarments? Pants that hug their backsides? Skirts so short they have to be careful not to bend down. For what purpose do you think they wear these things? To fit in, to be sure but ultimately, it is to get attention from the opposite sex. And attention they will get. Have you ever heard the expression, “If it ain’t for sale, don’t advertise it!” Maybe it’s that their mama’s are setting a sorry example and the daughters are just walking in her footsteps?
Just the other day, I went into the Dollar Tree and saw a mama with her two little Brittany Spears wanna-be's. They were about 5 & 7 years old and they had makeup on so thickly that they looked like they were getting ready to go work a corner somewhere. It was NOT cute. What on God's earth is that mother thinking? What could she possibly think others thought? If for no other reason than all the pedophiles and child abusers in our society, mothers need to get their heads out of the sand. God help our children!
The second thing we see is that a harlot is subtil of heart. Subtil is defined as sly; cunning, insinuating. This tells us that the women who is dressed like a harlot knows exactly why she’s dressed that way! She isn’t fooling anyone.
Modest attire does not draw attention to the female form. It covers that which the Lord calls “naked’. If anything above your knee is showing while standing OR sitting (or working, bending, etc) you are naked in the sight of God. (Ex. 28:42). I came to the conclusion a long time ago that if I had to adjust my clothing in order to sit down or be self-conscious when bending to pray at an altar, then it wasn't something I needed to be wearing.
But in all reality, we don’t need to get out a tape measure because covering your ‘nakedness’ is really just trying to conform to the letter of the law while missing the big picture entirely. Have you ever seen a child who was told not to do something and then proceeds to push the limits just enough so as not to break the rule but see how much he can get away with? That is what the question of skirt length is like. “How much can I get away with?” It’s not a matter of inches but intent . What is in your heart? Do you truly desire to please your Savior?
You can modestly and decently do just about any activity in a dress if it is long and full enough! I have done everything from paint to ride a 4-wheeler and everything in between in a dress. If modesty is really a concern, wear some leggings underneath. The purpose of dressing for our Savior is not to see how much we can get away with.
Other things to consider are, how low is your blouse? Can you bend over in it? Are any of your outer garments too clingy? Can you see the outline of your undergarments? Does your skirt or shirt hug any particular area of your body? Are you dressing to attract attention? Maybe you should examine your motivation.
IV. How’s your heart?
Isaiah 4:1 And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, We will eat our own bread, and wear our own apparel: only let us be called by thy name, to take away our reproach.
Sounds like they wanted their cake and to eat it to!
Let’s take a moment to peak inside your heart. Does reading the Scripture and seeing the truth that it contains upset you? Maybe you should consider why that is. God gives us instructions out of love for us and for our well-being. God wants his daughters to be pure of heart and body, to set an example for a lost and dying world. There are only two reasons why a Christian woman wouldn’t dress right. The first being that she is ignorant of what God expects, but if you’ve read this far, you are no longer ignorant! The second is that she has a heart problem.
Do you realize that if you know what is right to do and you don’t do it, it’s sin?
James 4:17 Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.
You are no longer have any excuses. Generally though, the problem is not a lack of knowledge but rather an unwillingness to obey God’s Word. See, doing the right thing can be a sacrifice. God’s Word calls us to be a living sacrifice for Him (Romans 12:1). I don’t think Jesus was very comfortable being nailed to a cross in shame that we might be saved. The very least we can do is live for Him.
V. Renew your mind!
Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
All to often today Christians are more conformed than transformed. They have adopted the world’s mentality of “if it feels good, do it.” May I ask you, since when does the world set the standard for God’s children? The word conform is very telling. It means to be made to resemble, put on the form of. If you go to the mall, the grocery store or a sporting event, what are the masses (the world) wearing? Pants (or shorts). It’s a sea of pants wearing, immodestly clad heathen and Christians want to blend right in with them. Is blending biblical? Of course not. The Bible says we are to be a peculiar people (Titus 2:14; 1 Peter 2:9)
I hope this study has given you something to think about. If nothing else, I want my girls to believe God’s Word - all of it - and I want them to know why they do. In closing, may I ask….
WHY ARE YOU DRESSING LIKE THE PAUPERS OF THE WORLD???
©Karen Owen 2008
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Aug. 5, 2007 - Putting the T.V. on Trial
....and I'm going for the death penalty! For many people, the television is of little consequence. Everyone has one and the only source of discussion surrounding the t.v. is what program to watch. This part of the "Why" series focuses on that box in the living room. Are you ready? Please remember, these studies were written with my children in mind, why we live the way we do in our home and what I want them to understand. You are free to disagree with me, but please do so nicely!
First, let me define what I mean by "television". I am *not* referring to pre-screened videos that you might use for education. The tv in and of itself is benign; it is what you watch on it that spreads a malignant cancer in the hearts and minds of young and old alike. When I use the term "television or tv", I am specifically referring to the programming that comes in via, satellite, cable or antenna.
It is also important for you to understand that I am not typing from a "holier-than-thou" position. We have been from one end of the spectrum to the other on this issue - from a 42" plasma tv and satellite to no television at all and everywhere in between. It is not my choice and not my decision to make. Were it mine, I would throw the tv and all it's components out the window, for at the very least, it is a colossal time waster.
So, let's get down to the the evidence - the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Shall we?
The Bible says, " Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: ..." Isaiah 1:18 (KJB) Let's use the good reason and judgment that God's given us and see what we can learn from His Word about this subject.
- The tv promotes a love for the world and worldly things. This is completely contrary to what the Bible commands in 1 John 2:15 "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him." TV viewing encourages a love and even a lust for the world and all it has to offer. Alcohol is portrayed in a way as to make our young people believe it's glamorous and gratifying to drink. Yet, it doesn't show the broken and shattered lives as a result of drunk driving, illicit relations and the lack of self-control associated with alcohol. Commercials constantly bombard our children with things they simply must have and produce discontentment and ungratefulness for the things they do have. Even mom is forced to wonder how her husband can possibly be attracted to her when having to constantly be compared to the flawless perfection of actresses and super models and our young girls are forced at a young age to assume a warped view of what beauty really is. It is very hard to not fall in love with the world when we are inundated with it in our living rooms!
Isn't it a bit hypocritical to:
a. Teach our children to speak kindly, refrain from cussing, not tell off-colored jokes, not talk about things that aren't pleasing to the Lord, show respect for parents and authority and not backtalk YET sit them in front of shows that promote the very things we teach against?3. TV is a huge time waster. Ephesians 5:16 "Redeeming the time, because the days are evil." If nothing else, think of how much more you could get done if you were to unplug the television. Think about how much time you could spend as a family, strengthening the bonds of family relationships, were it not for the tv. I know that some of the sweetest times we have had as a family were when we didn't have a television. The Devil is using it to further fragment families, and I cannot believe that it is pleasing to God.
b. Set a standard for dress that is modest and teach our children that it isn't right to show off one's body YET allow actors and actresses to parade around screen half naked, right in front of our children's eyes? I've seen it first hand. My darling daughters see a show where the woman is portrayed as oh-so-beautiful in her skirt that barely covers her hind end and the next day, they're hiking their skirts up, donning high heels and prancing around the living room "pretending". NO, they are TRAINING for what they want to be when they're old enough to make their own decisions and as parents we are setting a very confusing double standard.
c. Teach our children to avoid sin - lying, stealing, violence, fornication. To love what God loves and hate what God hates YET allow them to view the very things we teach against? No wonder our children grow up so confused. They are pulled in two different directions and parents are providing the platform for the confusion.
Parents invite all manner of sin and debauchery into their living rooms via the television and wonder why their children are drawn to the world. Ever heard the statement that "your walk talks louder than your talk talks." Children have an uncanny way of knowing what you really believe, what you're really like, at the core. And THAT is what they are going to follow.
4. ASK YOURSELF: DOES THIS BRING GOD GLORY? 1 Corinthians 10:31 "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God." Can you honestly, before God, say that the things you watch and the time you waste before the television bring Him glory?
This is getting long. Inevitably, there will be excuses for each and every point here. I've thought some of them, I've heard some of them and I've imagined some of them. The answers are coming in the next post. You know, the Devil has so many devices that he uses to fracture and divide our families. Why continue to give him the opportunity in the areas that YOU have control over?
Remember, if you are a *christian*, you are supposed to be Christ-like. Philippians 2:5 "Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:"
© 2007 Karen Owen
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Aug. 3, 2007 - TV Excuses (the 'Why' Series): continued
Ever heard that song? Excuses, excuses, you hear them every day. The Devil will supply them..... Well, you get the picture! So, this post won't make a whole lot of sense unless you read the previous one. Now we're going to talk about excuses. Feel free to send me more of them!
EXCUSE #1 So, you say that I shouldn't bring the world into my living room but my children see things every day at Wal-mart, etc. You can't possibly shelter them from everything!
ANSWER: Yes, you are correct. Your children will see all manner of sin and worldliness when they are out and about. The difference is that when you are out in the world, it is *expected* that you will see worldliness! We can teach our children that people need the Lord and until they find His saving grace, they will continue to live like the devil. With the television, you are inviting the portrayal of sin and worldliness into your home and saying it's ok by watching it under the guise of "entertainment". You are condoning it in the eyes of your children.
This really covers the "sheltering" issue. No matter how much we try to protect our children from the world, they will learn the ways of the world. Why would you want to make it easier for them??? I have an answer for that - curious? C-O-N-V-E-N-I-E-N-C-E Yes m'am, convenience. It is more convenient to stick the kiddos in front of the tube then to find worthwhile endeavors for them. I understand ~ truly, I do. I'm a wife, a mom of three, a homeschool teacher and a pastor's wife and that is just the tip of the iceburg. I understand. This is where some good, educational videos can come in handy, for those times when you need a half hour reprieve. Galatians 5:13 For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.
EXCUSE #2 But you can't shelter them from everything (part 2)
ANSWER: Sorry, the sheltering issue comes up so often that I can't help but re-visit it. So you're going to provide godless entertainment for your children because you just can't shelter them from everything? Are you going to provide them with tobacco? drugs? alcohol? I mean, you wouldn't want to "shelter" them, would you? Of course, I'm being sarcastic; the sheltering thing gets under my skin just about as much as the socialization thing :)
You have to remember that children are like tender plants. They need the purest environment to thrive. You wouldn't expect your seedlings to survive and prosper in contaminated soil, would you? Why then would you expect your children to?
EXCUSE #3 But I need to relax
ANSWER: Do you seriously believe that the only way to relax is to zone out in front of the tube? How sad! Seriously. Take a walk, read a book, play a board game, go for a drive, take a bath, listen to music, take the kids to the park, go fishing, go hiking, do yard work or some hobby that you enjoy. You'd be amazed at what you might find relaxing if you gave yourself the chance!
EXCUSE #4 What I'm watching isn't bad
ANSWER: My question to you is....IS IT GOOD? Remember, we are supposed to do ALL to the glory of God. Does it glorify God and bring Him honor? I know a lot of people will say that they only watch the news. The nightly news is probably some of the worst stuff on tv. Would someone please tell me what is good and honest and pure and lovely about the evening news?
For arguements sake, let's say that they program you are watching fits the bill of being glorifying to God (I would LOVE to know what you're watching!). Tell me, do the commercials? The music? The dress? Scenarios portrayed?
You know, I am not naive enough to think that unplugging that box that has held families captive their entire lives is an easy thing. It's not. But I do believe that not only will God bless you for it, your family will be blessed as well. Remember:
Romans 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
Something tells me that the Old Testament sacrificial lambs and bullocks didn't find their service very comfortable. I don't believe our Savior enjoyed Calvary. Jesus says that as christians, we are to present our bodies a living sacrifice for it is just our reasonable service.
Whatever you decide, may it be for HIS glory!
© 2007 Karen Owen
