Feb. 15, 2008 - A Pillar of Strength and Faith
That's how I've always thought of my Daddy. He's lived thru multiple heart attacks over the years and quadruple bi-pass surgery. He's lived with diabetes for the past 7 or so years. 6 months ago he had a brain tumor removed. Well, about three weeks ago (around the time my mother was getting out of the hospital) he was admitted to the hospital. His blood sugar was way out of wack (600) and he was having A LOT of pain, they said his oxygen was low and so was his blood. He kept complaining of his chest hurting so they did an x-ray and found a "significant" mass on one of his lungs. Last week they did a biopsy and it came back cancerous. They let him come home about a week ago. Yesterday, he went to his doctor's appointment and they told him that it has now spread to both lungs and his lymph glands. They can't cure it. His doctor said that they will do radiation for 15 days straight and then begin chemo. He said this would slow it down some and enable Daddy not to hurt so much where he can get out and enjoy the time he has left.
I have always been "Daddy's Girl" and this is tearing me apart. He is handling this ssssoooo much better than I am. He's at peace with it, for that I am thankful. I guess somewhere in me I thought (hoped) he would never die. Stupid me, huh!!! Though he keeps telling me he won't be dead. He'll be alive with Jesus in his knew body. I know this and understand this, but the selfish part of me just wants my Daddy. I Thank God that HE is the one in control. That is where I have found my peace. For as much as I love my Daddy, God loves him more. I am so thankful for the fact that my Daddy demonstrated his faith to me my whole life, that he loved me even when I was an unloveable teenager. My mind keeps rolling thru the years. I can see him sitting at a little childs table with me when I was about 4 or 5 and having tea parties (mind you my Daddy is 6'4 and over 200 lbs), when I was about 4 years old and we were holding hands and I kept asking him how did he know God was real and who was God's parent's, etc.... and he patiently answered each one of my questions with answers that I still carry around in my heart to this day. I remember being about 8 years old and everynight when he came home from work he would play chinese checkers with me. And on and on thru the years my memories roll. Just when I think I have a handle on things a knew bout of tears fall. I pray that he has a good bit of time left on this Earth, but if he doesn't then I am so happy to know that he will be singing with the angels.
Blessings,
Kristi
Comments
Feb. 19, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Jes
Oh Kristi,
I know this hurts. So sorry for you having to face this now, but what wonderful memories to have with your precious Daddy. Enjoy every second you have with him, I know you will. Praise God for having such a great example of your Heavenly Father in your earthly Father, you are a blessed woman. Praying these words are soothing to you - if not disregard and just accept a (((( hug)))) from me as I say nothing and let you cry...
Been there too
Feb. 20, 2008 - Daddy's Girl
Posted by Lachney1
Hi,
I'm sorry about your dad. I feel the same way about my dad. I know the time is going to come, when my dad goes home to be with the Lord too. I tear up just thinking about it. My dad is a very Godly man and I've always thought of God being just like my dad. When I hear the song, "Daddy's Hands" I cry. That song reminds me of my dad so much. He has always been so unselfish. He never would buy himself things, even though he really needed them.
Again, I'm sorry about your dad. I hope you get to spend as much time with him as possible.
Blessings,
Penny
