Jan. 17, 2009 - According to my calculations...this is episode eight!
Due to the extreme twisting of the truth in the most recent post *ahem* about how Syd the Non Popular Freak and Pip the Ever Popular Freak met, I, most glorious me (Pip, good GRIEF!), am going to tell you the REAL story.
Perhaps it would have been a boring summer day, the air sticky with August humidity and the flies buzzing around in everybody's ears like so many tiny vacuum, seeking to destroy the creative thinking process and wreck havoc upon the land with their unsanitary little...oh dear. I got sidetracked. *coughs into the Infamous Hankie and is glad she is alone in the weekly show studios at midnight instead of with Syd because Syd is going to a wedding (NO, not hers!) and would otherwise clobber her and it's been a looong day!!!!* Oh gaaa, I got sidetracked AGAIN!
It was a summer book festival, see. The librarian had invited me to help out by handing out fliers about the day's most glorious events by the door and personally knock anyone bold enough to bring food or drink past the daunting glass dorway silly! Much to my dismay, all of the good townspeople decided to come in through the BACK door (go figure) and all the fliers were being handed out by a NORMAL teenager. *collective gasp and Jaws theme plays hauntingly in the background* BILL, SHUDDUP!!! *crash* Bill, you're not supposed to be here, the one time I actually type up a episode in non-Pippernackian form! *another crash and then silence* Gee whiz. Anyhoo. I had absolutely NUTHIN else to do, I was bored to TEARS. *begins sobbing at the terrible memory* I had nothing else to do but comment on a distressed mother hauling her load of bratty kids our the door, her face red and flushed, to this weirdo sitting across from me. She was quiet and wearing a yellowish flowerprint dress from what I remember. She had glasses and refused to speak to me! She was so MEAN! She just sat there looking scared of me...but I don't blame her for that. >:-D After a while, for fear that I might fall asleep for boredom, the girl actually spoke. "Why don't you look at one of those cat magazines?" Her voice was biting and cruel, she WANTED me to leave her alone and stop staring at her! So, naturally, because I am, after all, most glorious, I picked up one of the library's cat magazines and flipped through it. Suddenly this creepy guy carrying a magazine about how to strike it rich walked by and I stared at his dozens and dozens of tattooes!
"Hey, you freak," he said to me, holding up the magazine, "this is the way to make it good in this world!" I leapt up, drawing my wicked silver dagger and holding it to the man's throat. "And if you don't leave me alone, I shall be forced to end your blatant money-making rat race!" I snarled. The guy scuttled away, guilty. I turned and saw the girl staring at me, openmouthed. "What school do you go to?" I said as if everything was back to normal. I knew the answer but I wanted to hear her actually SAY something! "I'm homeschooled, you idiot!" she replied. We've been friends from then on. By the time we were sent as slaves to the staff kitchen, not even the overseer's whip and her everlasting screech of "Overdue! Overdue!" could keep us from giggling over nothing and exchanging addresses to write to each other from our respective homes: Irish Bliss for her, The Party for me. Or...something like that.
Larlian: *walks in, trying to flip his hair out of his eyes like Slayt does* Hey, PIP!!!!!!! *is shocked* Why are you typing on the Rebel Computer in a dark studio in the middle of the night?!
Pip: Cuz Oi wanna, thet's whoi, you insubordinate stooypid widdle kiddo!!!!!!
Larlian: *cries because Pip hates him*
Pip: Awww, SHUDDUP! *wonders if she should dress all in black and summon Saffron to do away with Larlian, or just kill him off now*
Larlian: Syd is never this mean to Slaytyr, why are you so mean to ME?
Pip: Because, you soupy child, Syd LIKES you and if I went soft, I'd be ruined. I never liked you that much, anyhoo!
Clovis: *cartwheels in and promptly crashes into a brick wall* Why do we have brick walls in the studio?!
Larlian: *walks out, offended and angry at his uncaring Authoress*
Pip: *shouts after Larlian* And don't you go sidin' wid Wall-E, eitheh! Clovis, git outta here! Oi gotta nother book ta write!
Clovis: Ooooh, the book with Jules...
Pip: *silences Clovis with a punch* Next time, we don't spend two noights at Syd's house. *stalks off into the shadows, wearing a tie-dye shirt and a long brightly colored skirt lest anyone should think her...ugh...NORMAL*
Syd: *walks in the next morning, sees the chaos, screams, and runs off to call Pip and talk the curls out of her hair, or to sit with Bobby the Lamp shining away merrily on her feather tick to write Pip A Scathing Letter*
God bless an' all thet,
~PIP~ the Ever Popular Freak!!!
Comments
Jan. 17, 2009 - Untitled Comment
Called by dreamwalker
haha, okay. Whatever you say. Why was Clovis cartwheeling?
Anyways, I need to sway on my stool cause no one else want to listen to my music. Have a blessed day.
MJT,
Zel
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Jan. 19, 2009 - AHEM!!
Called by Syd
That is NOT how it happened!!!!! (read episode #7 if ya want th' REAL version o' how we met! :-D) Anyhoo......
*runs off inta th' Wicklow mountains in search o' Slayt*
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Jan. 19, 2009 - Untitled Comment
Called by Pip
Clovis wus cartwheelin' cuz he felt loik it. ;-) He's a handful, Clovis is...
>:-( Whaddya mean, thet ain't how it happened?! Course it is. OK, mebbe not QUITE thet way...but...heck, we'll jist keep on writin' episodes of our first terrified glance o' each otheh an' we'll be set fer loife!
God bless,
The Ever Popular Freak
Most Glorious...
PIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (As if one couldn't tell...)
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