Surviving Pregnancy • Jan. 25, 2008

Some of you have been waiting a really, really, long time for me to answer your emails, and for that I apologize.  Hopefully it just makes you realize that I am normal and have a threshold for what I can handle, just like you!  I am not Supermom

Kendra,

If you have time and think it would help other moms, can you talk a little about how you survive the last 2 weeks of pregnancy and the first 4-6 weeks postpartum, when the baby starts sleeping longer stretches?  We have a daily schedule, meals in the fridge, and a somewhat structured home.  We have three little girls right now, ages 6, 4, and 2, with #4 due today, and obviously not here!  We are homeschooling the oldest two, and started school back in June so we could take our ‘summer’ when the baby comes, and just do as much school as we need for sanity & structure.

Thank you so much for your encouragement & example!
Melanie


Hi Melanie-

Well, if I've figured correctly, that sweet baby due "today" is now two months old.  Yipes!  I am behind, aren't I???

You know, my life is very different now than when I had the same ages as yours: 6, 4, 2, and a newborn.  For one thing, having older kids is an amazing amount of help, and for another, I actually have help coming into my house now.  I'll blog on that later, but suffice it to say that I think those earlier years when the oldest of four is just six years old are HARD.

My husband can't take time off from work.  Once a patient actually got upset with his receptionist when she told him that my husband wasn't in the office because his wife was in labor.  Between impatient patients and running his dental practice solo, he just can't be away from the office very long.  I can't remember which baby, but with one who was born in the morning, he actually went back to work and saw patients in the afternoon.  I just can't rely on him for help and I marvel at the dads who are given a paid six-week paternity leave.  If that's your husband, be thankful!

As for surviving the last two weeks, I can tell you that I haven't been very good about it in the past.  The pressure that feels like a bowling ball (you all can relate, I'm sure), the sleeplessness, the exhaustion, the constant heartburn, and my sciatic nerve keeping me in pain made those last weeks a marathon of emotional and physical endurance.

But then the last pregnancy was completely different, although considering the pregnancy (my eighth), the fact that it was on the heels of a miscarriage, and my age (36), it shouldn't have been.  But the last pregnancy was the first one in which I was taking a fabulous supplement and having regular chiropractic care.  One or the other or both made all the difference in the world.

It might be a good idea to store up freezer meals during the second trimester when we feel good.  Then in the last few weeks, dinner is done.  I'd also think about super-simple meals the rest of the day-- cereal or peanut butter toast for breakfast and cheese, crackers, and apples for lunch.  If that's what you serve for 14 straight days, it's ok.  It's a season.  Oh, and eliminate or simplify snacks.  You don't need a fourth meal to clean up.  Oh, AND, eat outside where the crumbs don't have to be swept up

In the weeks postpartum, life is about survival and being a kind mom.  I'm a failure at this.  Apparently day four is my worst, or so my husband has noticed.  So I am already thinking about what I can do to be prepared for the day my hormones all attack at once and I am an exhausted, crying mess (wow, I sound pathetic, don't I?).  I might try to see if some of my littler or "trickier" ones can have a play date at a friend's home, or if I just need to sit the older ones down and let them know that I need to be in bed for the day.  My older ones are all so sweet when I have a need like that, but when I just had little ones like you, I think the best thing would have been to ask a friend to take them for the day.

Take the first few weeks or months (whatever you need) postpartum to ease into life.  This is a great time to invite all the children to snuggle in bed with you in the morning and turn on a short video to watch together.  Take the day slowly.  Don't stress about school.  Enjoy the baby but insist everyone have an afternoon rest or nap time.  Make hot cocoa with marshmallows and read picture books aloud while recouping on the couch.  Keep the little ones close by so they aren't in another room destroying everything in reach.

I am sorry it took me so long to respond to your questions, but hopefully your postpartum weeks went well. 

Blessings,
Kendra

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Great post, Kendra! - Jan. 25, 2008

Shared by Meredith_in_Aus
Don't stress about school with a 6 and 4 year old! Audio books and other educational cds (eg. educational facts set to music) are great for school post-partum. Sounds like you're pretty organised already anyway, so do as Kendra says, concentrate on being a nice mum. Such good advice.

In Him

Meredith
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Untitled Comment - Jan. 25, 2008

Shared by Rebeca
This is timely advice for me, as I'm at 31 weeks and trying not to start getting too anxious to meet this baby! I've felt much less fatigued this time around, and I think it's largely due to the Supermom vitamins. It's also the first time my iron levels have stayed normal throughout a pregnancy. All that, and my husband gave me the gift of having someone come in to help clean 1-2 hours per week.
I hope your pregnancy is going well.
Many blessings,
Rebeca
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Untitled Comment - Jan. 25, 2008

Shared by momco3
Kendra,
I second everything you just said. Our #4 is 3 weeks old, and I think I've served cheese and crackers and apples every day for lunch. Yesterday my son said, "I don't feel like Wallce & Grommit today." Thanks for your wisdom!
Annie
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Vitamins - Jan. 25, 2008

Shared by Mrs. S
Kendra,
You aren't the first mom I have heard rave about Supermom Vitamins. I also see that you and your husband really pay attention to what goes into your bodies. My question is do you know how the Supermom vitamins are processed? I have heard that a lot of vitamins are so processed we can't even utilize them in our systems. I currently take a nasty green foods drink for my daily vitamin. It is called Magma Plus by Green Foods. It is really beneficial under normal circumstances and is almost all organic and minimally processed. However, I have a low iron count and possibly gestational diabetes with this pregnancy and think I need more than what the Magma Plus is giving me. Sorry for such a long post. I really want to take something to help me as I am so exhausted. I read that Supermom helps level out blood sugar levels too. Any comments would be much appreciated!!
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Hi Mrs. S - Jan. 25, 2008

Shared by PreschoolersandPeace
I can't comment on the viability of the vitamins-- I just know they help me :) Check out their site (beeyoutiful.com). I bet they'll taste better than the drink :D
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really good! - Jan. 26, 2008

Shared by Quinne
Hi Kendra :) Just doing a little catch-up reading here. This is such a wonderful post! The way you share and the suggestions are just super.

I'm tagging this entry for late June, when I'll need to remember this encouraging advice myself :)
Love to you, Q
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About SuperMom Multivitamins.... - Jan. 28, 2008

Shared by deovolente
Did you know that NOW Special Two Multivitamins are the exact same (compare the ingredients) and cost much less? You can get them at www.bodybuilding.com/store/now/spec.html. They cost 20.99 for a 90-day supply.

These are identical to SuperMom...just in case anyone wanted a cheaper option!

Rachel
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St. John - Jan. 29, 2008

Shared by Anonymous
My "miracle" with my last pregnancy/postpartum was (in addition to careful diet and midwife/chiro care) St. John's Wort - not a pill, but taken by a dropper. Specifically <a href="http://www.goldenlotusherbs.com/index.php?pageid=2&itemid=208">this one</a> from Golden Lotus Botanicals. Only when I forgot to take it did I turn into a sobbing mess who couldn't face the world or my responsibilities.

<a href="www.aspiringtosimplicity.blogspot.com">EllaJac</a>
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Low iron - Jan. 30, 2008

Shared by Cena
Hi, reading through some of your things, Kendra. Great information.

I've been pregnant 10 times, and after the first couple with low iron, my midwife recommended an herbal liquid iron supplement that is found in health food stores and of course on the web. It's Floradix Formula and it works and doesn't taste bad. I take it daily when I realize I'm pregnant along with my vitamins and have not had a problem. My energy level is also definitely tied to whether I take it or not.

Also, I tend not to take advantage of those helpful souls who say to call if I need ANYTHING. Now I literally write their name and number down in a little notepad in my purse and I call them postpartum to do play dates with the littlest ones. And I don't know why we have a hard time letting a friend know it would make us joyously happy to have the kitchen sink scrubbed and bleached or the hall bathroom cleaned well. Maybe pride? Let people help. And don't forget to keep taking those vitamins and iron after the birth, to give your body the tools to heal quickly and well.
God Bless,
Cena
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