I just about died when I saw this on my brother's IM screen-name.
"On the sixth day, God made the platypus. And God said: 'Let's see the evolutionists try and figure this one out." |
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Apr. 13, 2008 Definition of my favorite verb
... Because I found out the other day that some people don't know about this word. It is really cool. :-)
MacGyver: -verb
The act of building something (usually explosive) out of handy arts-and-crafts supplies. (Example: I was locked in a titanium cupboard and had to MacGyver my way out with only baking soda, four thumbtacks, a chocolate Crunch bar, and my toothbrush.) |
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Feb. 3, 2008 Haven't had one of these for a while
Since it was Christmas recently (okay, a month ago), here's a Christmas-y quote.
"Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses."
P.S. I'll find out the score of my exam on Tuesday or Thursday. I am scared to death that I said the 4th Lateran Council met in 1315. *Buries head in hands* 1215! I know it's 1215! |
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Nov. 18, 2007 Einstein's law of relativity...
| When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein |
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Oct. 28, 2007 Sunday's Quote Sep. 30, 2007 Sunday's joke
So I'm breaking my own rules and putting a joke here instead of a quote, but I thought it was post-worthy.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
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Sep. 23, 2007 Sunday's Quote
I've been asked a whole bunch of times now, "Where do you get those quotes you post?" The internet is full of them. Just do a google search for "Famous Quotes" and see what you get. You do have to be on the lookout for them when people make them up on the spot. Like these:
Kenny Chesney is like the David Eckstein of Country music. Everyone in his band is like THIS much taller than him, and he's always jumping around. - Michael (My brother)
When all else fails, eat more chocolate. - My friend's mom
True, those aren't 'meaningfulish' as Striker said about the one I posted last week, but they're okay. Besides, David Eckstein would be my favorite baseball player if he was a Mariner, and you certainly can't go wrong with chocolate! |
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Sep. 16, 2007 Sunday's quote:
I read Jessica Tudor's blog on a daily basis. A while ago, she posted this quote, and I thought it fitting to share with you:
“I have from the first felt sure that the writer when he sits down to commence his novel, should do so not because he has to tell a story, but because he has a story to tell.” ~ Anthony Trollope |
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Sep. 8, 2007 For all who have difficulty converting units:
Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
1 million- microphones = 1 megaphone
2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
365.25 days = 1 unicycle
2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
52 cards = 1 decacards
1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton
1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
10 rations = 1 decoration
100 rations = 1 C-ration
2 monograms = 1 diagram
4 nickels = 2 paradigms
2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
Maybe that counted for a Sunday Quote; maybe it didn't. I sure thought it was funny, though! |
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Sep. 2, 2007 Sunday's Quote Aug. 26, 2007 Following the theme of my last post... Aug. 19, 2007 I'm not an intellectual... :-/ Aug. 12, 2007 Sunday's Quote
Since I have a quote collection that could fill the Grand Canyon, I figured I'll share them with you on Sundays.
"There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" - Woody Allen |
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