I can't claim to have invented all these strategies, but I really have no idea where I got most of the ideas, either.  So you'll just have to trust me - each of these things work.  As of yesterday, I was down 38 pounds, total.  That would be 34 Biggest Losers pounds.  I'll probably add things to this list as time goes on, as I'm still learning new things all the time.  Feel free to add your own strategies in comments.

In the beginning…

Measure everything.  Your idea of a serving size is probably not accurate.  If you need more than one serving size just starting out, don’t sweat it.  Do, however, OWN it.  Know you ate 2 or 3 servings. 

Food journal:  You need to write down every morsel you put in your mouth and every drop of every beverage that you take in.  This is for several reasons.  1.) To understand your eating patterns.  2.) To put a barrier between you and eating.  3.) For accountability.  Send this journal to a partner, friend, or someone you trust.  4.) As a record to look back on if you do very well, or do sort of poorly.  It is hard to hit a moving target, so having concrete evidence of what you have done to accomplish so much or so little is a great tool.

Eat with a baby spoon or fork.  This is not a “forever” strategy.  This is to help get you going.  The extra time it takes to eat will ensure you are satisfied with the smaller amount you are eating.  As you probably know, there are many more reasons to eat than because you are hungry.  If you are significantly overweight, you’ve definitely been eating for other reasons:  to medicate your stress level, to provide a reward for yourself, to entertain yourself when bored, etc.

Brush your teeth after dinner.  Odd as it sounds, it signals your brain you are done eating for the evening.  You are less likely to idly stick something in your mouth if you have already brushed your teeth.

Remove all barriers to exercise.  Put your tennis shoes and a clean pair of socks at the front door.  Or in the car.  Or next to your workout machinery.  I keep a small backpack at the ready with my dog’s leash, my arm weights, my iPod, and a chapstick in it.  Include whatever you need to make exercise a no-brainer. 

Use your Tivo, your DVR, or whatever your TV recording function is.  When you want to watch your favorite show, do so from that exercise machinery you previously only used to hang lingerie from when it needed dried.  Or, don’t just sit on the couch and watch a show – in that same amount of time, you can get the exercise done that you were sure you didn’t have time to do. 

If you have no exercise machinery, and have no way of leaving the kids to go for walk or to the gym, then get yourself a good, solid exercise video or two.  In this technology age, there really is NO excuse for not exercising (unless you are sick, or your doc says no!).  I wholeheartedly recommend Leslie Sansone’s Walking DVDs.  You can actually get in 3 or more miles – just doing the easy moves in the airconditioned comfort of your living room.  Too expensive, you say?  Just go to half.com.  Buy one used for what you would have paid for a Starbuck’s Caramel Macchiato! 

On staying motivated:  have a friend take photos of you.  The camera doesn’t lie.  Strangely, the mirror does.  (Really, our brains are what is lying when we look in the mirror and still think we look fine at 230 lbs.!  Our brains are looking to protect us, really.)  So, have a BEFORE photo done.  Then have a friend keep doing them in increments to keep your self-image real. 

Today, I went on my first true shopping trip since embarking on my support group's moms' weight loss enterprise.  I had planned to just make do with my clothes until I landed at my goal weight, but as my friend Mrs. MonkeyParade said, people were getting tired at looking at the top of my underwear, which is what shows around the waistline when the crotch of your britches is hanging down at your knees.  TMI, maybe!  Plus, my mom would say, "Are you bragging or complaining?"  But truly, I was (and still am) having a closet crisis, so off I went.

I had exactly one hour, and exactly one two-year old.  While it wasn't exactly a fruitful expedition, I learned a number of things. 

1. I think big, pun intended.  I am incapable of looking at clothes and estimating whether or not they will fit me.  I believe this applies both directions, size-wise.  I just am not able to keep a realistic picture of my volume in my head.  I took a ginormous pile into the dressing room and came out with 2 dresses that fit.  For the most part, I'm no longer a "Women's" size.  THAT felt good!  And Mrs. MonkeyParade graciously shared the moment with me from the comfort of her own home when I called her from my cell phone in the dressing room.  I'm apparently a size 16 -- which they evidently sell in the regular ladies section.  I think that still qualifies as a "plus" size, though.  I found the sizes absolutely baffling.  Can anyone tell me how that works?  What's the dif between a 16W and a 16?  What is one less than a 1X?  Most of my 2X shirts still work, so I won't need to purchase any of those yet.

2.  I was terrified to leave the Women's section in pursuit of clothing that fit.  The dress section was doable, because they are on the same side of the store as the Women's clothing, but I felt like everyone was staring at me.  "What is she doing there?  Doesn't the poor dear know that these are the REGULAR ladies' sizes?"  Do you think they were really looking at me, or could they have been looking at the baby, or might I actually be paranoid??  Nonetheless, I'll have to get someone to go with me next time. 

3.  Clothes actually exist that make me look nice -- instead of just covering me up.  Now that was a real mindblower for me.  As a plus-size lady for much of the past 12 years, I have programmed myself to seek clothing that looks like it might have been produced by Omar The Tentmaker.  You know the stuff.  The clothing that HIDES you.  Or even worse, I usually avoided buying clothing at all and instead bestowed my retail therapy energies on shoes.  After all, I never had to wear plus size shoes or go to a special store exclusively for shoes in my size.  My point is, I did a lot of compromising with tastes.  I don't own a lot of clothes that I really like.  Just clothes that fit -- at least from my perspective.  Or clothes that hide my sins.  So while I have a long way to go, more than 50 pounds by my reckoning, I can see that this clothes buying thing could be fun. 

That reminds me to say that I adjusted my goal weight 10 lbs. south today to 145.  My husband asked if that would be healthy.  I thought that was amusing, since he used to complain that the weight I was at was very unhealthy.  I'm not sure it is doable, but I did see a dietician a good 8 or so years ago and she did the bone measurement, etc., and declared that I should weigh 147.  So I thought my 155 pound goal might be going too easy on myself.  I suppose if I get there and it doesn't seem right, I can say uncle then.  I realize that I shouldn't count my chickens before I hatch, but progress has been quite steady and I remain hopeful that this time will be the time that I permanently change my life and maintain a healthy weight.

We had the final weigh-in for our homeschool support group's Biggest Losers Club on June 9th, so the results are in!

As I mentioned before, we have provision for two winners.  We judge by both percentage of body weight and total number of pounds.  A fabulous lady named Margaret, who has 6 children, won for losing the highest percentage of her body weight.  She lost 11.41% of her body weight!  I lost for the highest number of pounds lost -- 24.5. This was 10.84% of my original body weight lost.  I was very happy with this, since I expected to only lose the 15 lbs. we set as a goal for the 8 week round. 

Here is my BEFORE picture:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/27890812@N06/2598843057/

Here is my shortly thereafter picture: 

http://www.flickr.com/photos/27890812@N06/2598843139/

I have a long way to go, of course, but certainly, I've made progress and I'm very pleased with that.  Most importantly, I was invited to accompany my 74 year old father on an 11 mile hike with a marked upward pitch, and I was able to accommodate him.  Would I have even DREAMED of doing that prior to April 14th?? 

To avoid any backsliding, we began a new round on the same day, same meeting as the finale for Round 1.  5 new ladies joined, which is really nice.  I look forward to seeing them make progress and their confidence soaring as well. 

Today was the day! 

I dropped a couple of pounds all of a sudden and voila!  I suddenly was one pound less than I weighed when I first started my series of over-40 pregnancies a few years ago.  That was something I really wanted to get behind me, because there has been a lot of emotion wrapped up in it.  My sister even speculated that perhaps that was why I couldn't seem to get back there, weight-wise.  Anyhow, I'm 21 lbs down (17 Biggest Loser pounds) and I now have 54 pounds to go to meet goal. 

That's a lot better than 75 lbs., isn't it?

I am now four weeks into the Biggest Loser experiment, and fourteen pounds down (18 total).  We had our second weigh-in yesterday (they are every 2 weeks).  According to the official Biggest Loser scales, I weighed 212 pounds yesterday.   I still blush when confessing my weight, because I'm still over two-hundred, which I find quite embarrassing (perhaps I should start giving my weight in kilos)!  But since my starting weight was 226, I know I should be ecstatic.  Truth is, it IS fun to put on your clothes and have them be actually baggy instead of binding.  And it sounds a lot better to say you have 57 pounds to lose than 75. 

I know I tend to be too dogmatic about these things, but I am now convinced that EVERYONE actually has the time in their schedule already to get in shape and stay there.   I lamented for years that there was no way I could find time to exercise because there were only so many hours in the day.  Turns out, I just needed to recycle hours that I already had.  I mentioned in a previous blog that I've been exercising while my kids were in piano lessons -- time I used before to run errands. You can add to that now Boy Scouts.  So that is at least 2 days a week that I have more than an hour of free time.  I just push Baby along in the stroller and he enjoys these brisk walks as much as I do, as does whichever Big Boy I have brought along.  And don't we all have a favorite TV show?  I sure do.  One hour of watching Lost from my perch on my exercise bike does a whole lot for my waistline than the exact same hour spent riding the couch.  So there you go:  recycled time.  We all know I was going to watch Lost either way!

The other good thing about exercise is that your husband is much more likely to cooperate when you say, "Honey, can you watch the kids?  I need to go work out," than he is if you say, "Honey, can you watch the kids?  I need to go lock myself in our room and read a book!"

My workout time has become the cherished daily, private, kid-free time I really need to stay sane. Which should tell you something about my state of mind BEFORE embarking on the Biggest Loser journey. 

And I'm enjoying food so much more.  There's no need for pangs of guilt when you have a plan and you stick to it.  You can truly savor each bite you place in your mouth.  Everything tastes much more dramatic to me, I think because I eat so much less.  I don't buy "large" anything anymore, but eat and drink everything in a moderate fashion -- even things that don't have a lot of calories, like diet soda and coffee.  

In short, my life is much richer even while I strive to become smaller. 

Today was the big day, the first weigh-in.  I was as nervous as I was on my wedding day.  Well, not quite. 

The results? 

I lost 10 pounds in the two weeks since our initial weigh-in!  (Weighed in at 216 pounds.) Another lady lost 8 pounds -- which amounted to a greater percentage loss of her body weight, since she is smaller than me to begin with.  So we both sort of won! 

And the Club's total loss was 41 lbs, spread over 8 of us.  That's terrific, I think; an average of 5.1 lbs per person.  I've seen some pretty heroic efforts from this group.  One lady sprained her ankle, but did she let that stop her?  NOOOOOO.  She found exercises that she COULD do, and before long she was doing crazy stuff like walking 3 miles to the grocery store and 6 miles to church...

My own life has changed significantly.  No longer do I go days at a time without leaving the house.  No longer do I eat to comfort myself, or to reward myself (okay, okay -- there were these 5 sweet, fat, juicy grapes I ate today to celebrate a successful weigh-in!).   No longer do I feel that my circumstances prevent me from exercising.  But the strangest thing of all is that I have found myself becoming more moderate with everything.  Where I used to drink a whole pot of coffee, I now limit myself to 1 cup.  Where I used to swig diet sodas like nobody's business, I limit myself to 2 a day (preferably one, for a treat).  Could it be that you CAN teach old dogs new tricks?  Can a severely obese 43 year old learn to get a grip and enact a permanent lifestyle change that will support a healthy weight?

Because of all my failures in the past, I find myself wanting to believe, but at the same time, listening for the sound of that other shoe dropping...

Starting a "Biggest Loser" Club within my homeschool support group turned out to be exactly the right move for me.  Thankfully, a couple of my blogger buddies were game, and the responses to the announcement about it were enthusiastic.  We limited the Club to those who were at least 20 lbs. over the top of their healthy weight range for their height and to those who could commit completely to losing 15 lbs. over the length of the 8 week competition.  All had to be homeschool moms and members of this support group.  We will have formal weigh-ins every 2 weeks and there is a planned activity on the weeks there isn't a weigh-in.  Members agreed that journaling their food intake in detail, and exercising a minimum of 30 minutes per day, 5 times a week would be our primary strategy.  Each had to choose her own diet plan and form/s of exercise.  We are not only competing individually, but have divided into teams.  This gives each of us a stake in the other's progress.  If someone on the team GAINS weight, well, that erases the fact that someone else has LOST weight.  Also gives you a big sense of responsibility.  And accountability.  In short, it is proving to be a recipe for success.

I had been floundering in my efforts to lose the necessary 75 lbs. before, but the specter of a public weigh-in got me on track abruptly.  I started in earnest the week before the first BL Club Meeting, in a conscious effort to avoid the "I'm going on a diet Monday, so have to pig out all weekend" syndrome.  This got me down to a not-so lean, but very, very mean (drumroll,  please) -- Two hundred and twenty six pounds.  I know, I know.  Scary.  I'm 5 ft. 6 and one-half inches tall, so it isn't like I'm carrying it well, either!  This was at the first official BL Weigh-in on April 14th.  If my scales are to be believed, I'm down to Two hundred and eighteen and one-half pounds, as of this morning.   So that is 7.5 lbs -- and if you add on the 3 or 4 I lost before the program started, I'm really making some progress.  Already, I've broken the plateau that I had reached in my earlier efforts. 

At times, I'm sure I'm just having an out-of-body experience, for I seem to have developed some very non-Queenlike habits.  Now, instead of driving around doing errands or shopping while waiting for my kids in their classes and lessons, I pop the baby into his stroller and hit the Greenbelt to get my exercise in.  That's easy, because I now carry a pair of tennis shoes and some socks in my car.  And sometimes, the kids' bikes, so they can have fun, too.  I keep my iPod in my purse at all times, just in case an opportunity to go sweat in solitude should arise.   Oh, and water bottles everywhere.  (Don't worry, I'm recycling...)  All these years, I've honestly believed I didn't have time or opportunity to exercise.  I think I've debunked that pretty thoroughly now, since the King has been out of the country for 2 weeks and I've still managed to do something every day that I needed to.  Mostly, it is walking, and sometimes, it is my exercise bike.  Once, I did a workout video (I was skeptical before, but no more!), and another time, I played soccer and frisbee with 2 of my Club Cohorts and all the children present.  Nothing like a game of soccer with a gaggle of 8 and 10 year olds to show you how pathetically out of condition you are!

I'm not saying that I haven't found myself on the exercise bike at midnight a couple of times, because that was really the first opportunity I had.  But generally, where there's a will there's a way .  Somedays, the will may not have been where it needed to be, BUT a team member was there to make sure I didn't falter.  Every day, I've learned something new about myself, or about addiction, excuses (many of them my own!), or people in general.  It is so nice not to be "in it alone."  As I mentioned before, a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.  But the trip will sure go faster if you have a companion -- or 8!

No, I'm not contemplating ending it all.  In fact, I'm feeling rather joyous!  I've remembered who I really am.

A memory hit me this week when talking to my dear friend Mrs. MonkeyParade about our new initiative.  (Yes, Adult ADD is a real condition!)  As I walked tonight, I remembered this incident from long ago in greater detail.  I've skiied about a hundred million times and never once hurt myself.  I played basketball ONCE in college to fill in for someone and tore a bunch of ligaments in my ankle.  I wound up with a cast on my leg and crutches for a really long time.  Not a fun thing to deal with in college, might I add.  I had to work through a lot of surprising challenges everyday and it was a very humbling experience:  how to carry my books to class (find some boy to do it); how to get my meal tray to a table; what shoe to wear on the other foot, etc., etc.  Well, I was really starting to feel sorry for myself for a while there, when I bumped into Eddie Stephens. 

Eddie had blown out his Achilles tendon.  HIS cast went practically from the bottom of his foot to his armpits.  He was going to be on those despised crutches forever, compared to my 4 to 6 weeks.  He was much worse off than me.  But was he feeling sorry for himself?  NO!  Eddie was absolutely injected with life.  We started hanging out, helping each other, and before we knew it, two other girls injured themselves and joined our little gimp's club.  Soon, we had figured out how to play flag football, on crutches, roller hockey on crutches (we could share skates, since we each had only one good foot), climb a few campus trees, and countless other things.  What started out to be an isolating, social semi-catastrophe, turned out to be a real test of our mettle.  And I passed with flying colors.  I became MORE active than I had been when both legs were operational.  It was with some pride that I heard the doctor say something along the lines of "Gee, this cast is broken in 3 places and covered with grass stains!" 

Well, THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is how I want to leave this world.  With all obstacles to living life at its best broken in three places and/or at the very least, covered with green stains from the trying. 

I remember how badly I longed to be able to go running, or climbing, or whatever, when I was locked into that body limited in mobility by that cast and crutches.  And for a long time after that, I remembered to squeeze as much life as possible out of every moment lest the worst ever happen and I got permanently stuck like that.  But eventually, life happened.  The single largest contributing factor in that 75 lbs. gain is that I had children, and with that came a million excuses for not "getting out there."  Now, I'm trapped in a cast of my own making.  About 75 pounds of it!  So the things I love to do are difficult for me, if not impossible.  And if I manage them anyway, I'm somewhat embarrassed about it.  You should see people stare when a 225 pound woman skis down the hill!  And I'll never forget when I was getting into the kayak at the bioluminescent bay on Vieques, PR, and the guy said "Um, you'll need to get into one of those kayaks" pointing to some larger ones.  That was at the height of my denial, so I thought "What the heck is he talking about??" 

When you are young, there is always time to do it tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year.  But I'm not young anymore.  I hit 43 this year.  Noone can deny that my life is more than halfway over, according to the actuary tables, at least.  Do I want to go out sitting in a wide-bottomed cushy chair, remembering all the fabulous things I've done in my life, but really unable to replicate any of them?  Or do I want to go out the way I lived when I was happiest?  Maybe a few broken bones here and there, and lots of grass stains, but with a grin firmly planted on my wrinkled face.

I know the answer to that question. 

The odds are against my success.  Most people who get to a BMI with the label "Severely Obese" are not able to permanently change their condition for the better.  Over the years, I've lost and regained more pounds than most of you weigh to begin with.  But I have to try, don't I? 

Desperate times call for desperate measures.  I've started a Biggest Losers' Club.  There will be lots of adventure to report in the weeks to come.  And hopefully, those adventures will include at least 8 others who are temporarily handicapped by extra weight, but are game to start living life at its fullest.    A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.  Unfortunately, so does a journey of 100 yards.  So, my friends, I'm asking for help:  Please pray that my Team members and I can stay the course and meet our goals and achieve a permanent healthy lifestyle change. 

I'm going to be posting some very embarrassing information about myself in this blog in the near future.  So check back!  I need the accountability. 

...doesn't necessarily mean I'm not doing something! 

The King and I slipped away for 2 glorious days of skiing last week.  In Utah.  Where they have actual snow versus mere "vertical ice rinks."  That was last Sunday and Monday for me (3/2/ and 3/3).  The King is in better shape and actual skiied during a veritable blizzard on Tuesday as well (he later admitted that 8 degrees Fahrenheit with hurricane-strength winds had rendered it sort of a waste of money).  Happily, we had fabulous weather the day before, and jolly snowflakes intermittent with startling sunshine the day before that.  The Thursday before that trip, I had skiied some 6 hours or so up at Ober Gatlinburg.  There was a good snow fall (8 or 9 inches) so we just canceled school and hit the slopes!   I felt the burn that day, to be sure.  I was practically a cripple from the burn in Utah.  So, I've got a whole new resolve to get in shape.  The King promises to give me another shot at Utah if I can pull myself back together by next winter.

So, both yesterday and today, I snuck out of the house for 2 mile walks.  That's the distance to my mailbox and back.  I must say, I was moving kind of slow by the time I made it up the hill and back on the driveway both ways.  The secret is to turn the volume on your iPod to a level that camouflages the ragged sound of your breathing and the noisy beating of your heart.   Do that, and you can totally believe yourself to be young and slim again.  Throw in Alanis Morrisette, and you are guaranteed to burn off some hostilities. 

So strap on your iPods, grab your bottled water and whistle for the dog -- let's hit the slopes of Walland together.

I knew when I started that this would be a difficult journey.  Here it is February 2nd and I fell off the wagon right around Christmas time.  We traveled and I didn't make the time to exercise.  Eating right was hard.  In fact, it was pretty much eat wrong or go hungry.  (Not that I went wild or anything.)  And when I returned home, I got sick, and then sick again, and really, only in the last 2 weeks was I well enough to have actually exercised.  I did manage to ski twice, which was very encouraging.  I will say, though, that I could really, really feel the lack of exercise on the last ski day (1/27/08) and even as I bulged through the slats in the lift chair, I resolved to do better.

On the plus side, I didn't gain all the weight back (maybe 3 pounds), but I didn't lose anything either.  And because this blog is all about quantifying progress, I'm going to post exactly what that cost me.  Friday should have been a painful but much anticipated milestone.  I should have weighed almost 15 pounds less than I do today.  Why was that particular weight significant?  It would have transported my body and self-esteem back to a happier time, as it marked the spot on the scales where I stood when I became pregnant with Garrison (the lost pregnancy). 

 While it is key not to dwell too much on failures, it behooves me to count the cost of those evenings sitting on my fanny in front of the TV when I could just have easily been watching from the exercise bike.  Sadly, the date in which I could reasonably anticipate reaching my goal is moved from  to August 15 to Oct 13.  That's a heartbreaker.  

And let me go ahead and tell you there are some challenges ahead for me.  When the King leaves town, I often crawl into bed as soon as the kids are asleep -- craving quiet, craving comfort, and craving rest.  It's a mental health thing.  And alas, the King has some major trips planned.  

Secondly, our every-other-week housecleaning services have been discontinued, so I'm going to have to figure out how to work that extra load into my daily routine. 

My strategy then, must include to get into a healthy pattern THIS WEEK, before the King leaves.  Secondly, I'm going to go enlist in FlyLady's plan right now.  She breaks the housework up into Zones and short spurts of time.  Liberal use of timers.  I've tried it before and had some success.  Blogless Adele also recommended a book to me called Managers of Their Home, by Carrie Maxwell.  Evidently, the premise of that book is to break your day into 30 minute increments.   Plus, I'm pretty sure that neither Carrie Maxwell nor Blogless Adele sleep in until their baby wakes up, like I do.  (He usually wakes up around 8:30.)  So that brings me to the third strategy:  I must get up earlier!  I need to look at this motherhood thingy as a regular 8 hour a day job and start at the regular time.  Even though we all know it is really more like an 18 hour a day job and I'm not going to be finished until I hit the sack.  But my goal needs to be to keep up the intensity for at least the regular 8. 

Any ideas you have, suggestions, motivators, recriminations, etc?  Bring 'em on. 

In spite of my reported plateau, I did manage to lose 1.5 lbs since last week's weigh-in.  The goal for each week is 2 and I overachieved early on so I had some breathing room.  I am still 1.5 lbs ahead of target.  In other words, if I only lose half a pound this week, I will still be on target.    But I want to keep that margin of error, so I'm still going to aim for the 2 this week, in spite of plans to go out of town (always a diet and exercise killer for me -- must resolve to hit the hotel work-out room).

I have upped my exercise an additional 15 minutes, which is an increase of 50%, so hopefully that'll make the difference and send me crashing through the wall. 

My friend Tim left a comment that I should pick out a form of exercise that I really love in order to sustain it, rather than bore myself to death on the stationary bike.  I told him that the only exercise I have ever truly loved has been running and that I'm just too heavy to be able to do that right now.   He argued with me, but it is true.  The stress on my joints is a consideration when I am still carrying around an extra 67.5 pounds, don't you think?  Perhaps in another 20 or 25 pounds it will be more realistic.  I did, however, remember another sport that I loved -- tennis!    So now I just need to find someone who is pretty lousy at tennis to play against, then find 2 free hours two or three times a week, and a willing babysitter to come to my house!  Yeah, that's what I thought, too. 

Not to diminish Tim's own efforts -- which have been Herculean since July 1st -- but I chortle to myself whenever he says:  "I just do my exercise first thing in the morning."  It is definitely different for men/fathers.  Who is going to watch all these children first thing in the morning when the King is working, or out of town, if I'm not in the house?  Who is going to nurse the baby while I'm out exercising?  Who will make sure the other two get a decent breakfast so they aren't whiney before their math (1st) lesson is even done -- if I am out taking care of Numero Uno??  Now it is true that, in lovely weather, I can take them with me, Baby in the bionic backpack.  If the school work is caught up or we don't have to rush some subjects because we are heading off to Scouts or Boot Camp or piano lessons or ... you get the idea.  Or if the planets align just so, I can hurry off for a walk with the big boys when Baby is down for his nap (and the King happens to be home working).  But I really just can't march off at will and get some fresh air.  Although Tim isn't just getting air, he's accomplishing great things!  Check out HIS X Blog.  Puts me to shame.  [Sidenote:  When I dipped over to his blog to get a link, I noticed he had linked to my last blog!  How sweet!]

Anyhow, my point is not to make excuses, but maybe to say that integrating truly interesting exercise into your day to day life takes a willing and present partner -- a partner in juggling the duties of parenting, as well as in encouraging one another.   Alas, while the King is really trying to stick to the South Beach Diet program, he's a little limited in being able to help me with the children in order to free me up.  So for now, I just feel so thankful that I have the option of the stationary bike, in spite of all my whining.  It is there for me day and night and I have found myself on there, getting my time in at midnight a time or two.  Nice to have that option in a sometimes topsy-turvy routine-challenged life.  And REALLY nice to have a friend like Tim -- a natural and professional motivator -- there to motivate me onward in a slump.  I also know Tim goes out of his way to make sure Mrs. Tim gets her turn to exercise as well, and that is priceless. 

I'm looking forward to warmer days when waterskiing will become part of my regular exercise program!

Maybe it is my age.  Maybe it is my past proclivity to yo-yo dieting.  Maybe I'm not exercising vigorously enough, drinking enough water, or heck, maybe I'm simply eating too much of the South Beach Diet-friendly things.  But I'm stuck, and not in a happy frame of mind about it. 

Plateaux have, in the past, derailed many an effort of mine.  I start to feel like I DESERVE to lose weight, so what's going on?  And I turn to my drug of choice (food) and make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.  Sooooooo...

I have upped the water intake, tacked on an extra 15 minutes to the old exercise bike non-excursion, and generally done a lot of griping to friends. 

What magic tricks do you recommend to keep one going in hard times?

Tomorrow marks the 2-week mile-marker and I'm hoping for a 7-pound net loss to report to my South Beach Diet Yahoogroup.  (I highly recommend joining this group if you are dieting on a shoe-string, and/or just need some advice and a variety of recipes.)  I was horrified to discover that my "official" starting weight was actually around 2 pounds less than my actual weight, thanks to an abundant Thanksgiving.  So I've been a little more successful in gross loss than my numbers reflect, I'm proud to say.

I've managed to negotiate several parties without major lapsing on the carbs.  I'm very thankful for that.  I am FORCING myself to weigh everyday for honesty's sake (like many very heavy people, I am good at lying to myself) and I'm remembering that salt is NOT my friend.  I retain water, and the weightloss just comes to a screeching halt for 48 hours after I've indulged in Indian or Thai food.  (Even sans the rice.)  Water, however, IS my friend, and finding ways to force myself to drink it is a bit of a challenge.  I like the new flavor packets that are engineered for that purpose, but struggle to find ones without aspertame (I'm still nursing and don't want to poison the little guy).  So far, only one flavor of one brand (Archer Farms, from Target) is sweetened with Splenda, and I couldn't find it last time.  So my goal this week will be...

Drumroll please ...

To drink 8 16 oz. glasses of water per day.  Another thing I've learned since starting this journey is that fluoride -- apparently even in the amount found in our public water supply -- suppresses thyroid function.  So I'm counting on my Pur water filter to help me out there.  So much easier to get it cold from the unfiltered fridge, though.  My thyroid has little to no function to start with, as I have Hashimoto's Disease -- basically an autoimmune kill-off of the thyroid function.  So virtually all the hormone I'm getting is synthetic to begin with.  Apparently, fluoride interferes with that, as well.  EVEN IF YOU BATHE IN IT!  Needless to say, this news was a trifle disheartening.  Why, pray tell, do they add fluoride if it is going to contribute to making people sluggish and fat??  Most of the research was from the U.K. strangely, so if anyone can direct me to alternative research (U.S.?) to tell me I'm wrong about this, bring it on!  In all fairness, I know lots of skinny people drink and bathe in the same tap water I do.

The exercise is doing its job; I feel much more alive.  And my mantra that "I have to spend the time somehow" is working, too.  I found myself on the exercise bike at 12:10 a.m. the other morning (after a Hanukkah dinner) on the grounds I was going to watch the Monk re-run anyway!  I did quit posting my exercise everyday, because I have been doing the same thing over and over again and well, it is boring!  I have missed a total of 3 days in the last 2 weeks.  Never consecutive, and I didn't feel badly about it.  It was a tough 2 weeks with the King gone.  Sometimes, going to sleep has its benefits too!

My database is working for me; I encourage anyone who would like to join me to get a copy and make it your own.  It really helps with that feeling of being STUCK.  Stuck at this weight, size, measurement, etc.  It's far too easy to give up and forget to see that your results -- while teeny incrementally  -- will add up to something substantial over time.  (Inevitably leading to a spoon and a pint of Ben and Jerry's or my personal favorite:  Buffalo Wing and Blue Cheese Doritos and French Onion dip...)  The King announced a trip to Germany in February, so the first thing I did (I know, I'm sick!) was check my database to see what weight I'd be on that date.  Most Germans do not look like most of us Americans.  They walk everywhere and tend to be rather svelte.  I feel I stick out like a sore thumb there and heaven forbid I should need to purchase clothing in my size anywhere in Europe! 

Alas, I won't have broken any particularly ugly numbers by then, but surely I'll be feeling better.  Should be down another 15 pounds or so.  Maybe time to get out the sacks of flour and visualize how much less that will stress my joints, feet, etc.? 

Oh, and by April 11th, I should be able to remove my wedding ring and CLEAN IT for the first time in over 9 years! 

So onward, albeit at snail's pace...

As of this morning, I don't have 75 pounds to lose anymore, or even 70.   I have 69.5!  Woo hoo!

So just to keep me grounded, I'm going to post the ugliest picture of myself, ever; from back when I weighed almost 20 pounds more than right now.  In my defense, I had been in Italy for about 2 weeks and had packed on about 10 of it during that time.  So this is me-at-my-worst in Rome: 

Note:  After seeing this photo of myself, I recently had my hair cut so that I can never ever wear it pulled back in a ponytail again!  Perhaps short sleeves should be outlawed, too?

I've had a couple of people express interest in joining me on my journey.  I hope they will do so, and when the dark days of dieting strike, we can defeat them together!

As of this morning, I've lost something in the neighborhood of 6 pounds so far.  Yes, I know:  most of it was undoubtedly water weight.  But on the plus side, that's water weight I'm not trying to fit in my jeans anymore, so hey, I'll take it! 

On the negative side, it is much easier to watch what I eat when the King is out of town.  He has been gone for over a week.  I can just eat a yogurt cup if I want to (key lime, coconut, pina colada, yum) and feed the kids something simple like whole wheat pasta and canned peas.  I will need to think up a strategy to avoid derailing myself with all the meals he will expect.  Fortunately, he wants to practice the South Beach Diet himself, but I know he would be bored with my usual staples for Phase 1:  olive-oil fried eggs with blue cheese sprinkles, canned black beans, salad with garbonzos and blue cheese sprinkles, nitrate-free lunch meat, green peppers dipped in blue cheese dressing (spot the recurring theme??), chili, and yogurt.  I have the SBD Cookbook, but so many of the dishes seem complicated.  Do any of you have tips on dieting while feeding a family? 

Exercise today:  33 minutes on the exercise bike.

Tonight, I stumbled on a new motivation tool:  shopping.  Yes.  Shopping for women's CLOTHING.  It was horrifying.  And now I know what to do if ever I feel like hitting that Starbuck's Window for a Venti Caramel Macchiato with a cinnamon chip scone.  (That splashing sound you just heard was the drool hitting the glass on top of my desk...)

Exercise Today:  30 minutes on the exercise bike. 

Saturday was one of those days when there literally was NOT 30 minutes that could be given to official exercise.  That is, unless I had elected to a.) not feed the Baby, or b.) miss an appointment, or c.) be any later to help at the best party I've been to in about 12 years!   I felt like I was on a dead run every minute of the day. 

But I don't consider the day a failure at all.  I did take the time to eat South Beach friendly foods occasionally throughout the day so that the dessert table didn't call to me later.  I spent about 5 hours on my feet at the party, running from room to room.  (My sore, aching feet -- I'm soooo out of practice with high heels.)  I even danced a waltz!  And shockingly enough, I did manage to avoid the aforementioned table, which was quite a feat, given its spectacular decor and diversity of sinful options. 

So, today I'm back on the horse and ready to ride!

Exercise Today:  30 minutes on the exercise bike.

When I'm not dieting, it is an absolute necessity to weigh myself every single day -- if I don't wish to pack on the weight.  Something about the honesty of those cold hard numbers.  I wonder, though, if it is advisable to do that while engaged in a diet because the incremental change is too small.  Perhaps I should just weigh once a week.  I go back and forth on it, though. 

I really thought I was feeling really yucky and tired and even put "bone tired" as my Facebook status tonight.  But something weird happened when I got on that bike tonight.  When the thirty minutes were up, I didn't stop.  Maybe it was that I was watching Grey's Anatomy at the time (a guilty pleasure).  Or maybe it was my fascination with those numbers on the digital readout of my bike.  I watched myself go almost 7 miles, burn 400 calories (I hope they all came off my hips!), and spend 45 minutes when I only set out to do a lackluster 30...

So, today, I feel like a champ! 

Today's Exercise:  45 minutes on the stationary bike.

The timing didn't present itself for a daytime walk today, and the King is on the other side of the continental US, so going kidless is out of the question.  I guess I will be hitting the exercise bike again this evening.  I did remember that I have an old-fashioned Nordic-Trak hidden away upstairs.  I may drag that out if I get bored with the bike.

I was thinking last night that 30 minutes of exercise a day may not be enough for what I'm trying to accomplish.  Perhaps I should up it to an hour?  When you watch these "Greatest Loser" style makeover shows, they have those people working out hours and hours per day.  While I'm psyched for that now, I'm not sure that's sustainable for me.  I guess that's one of those things you just have to handle one day at a time, crossing the bridge when you get to it.  Anyhow, 30 minutes is probably more of a maintenance minimum and I need to "up" the momentum.  I know myself all too well and when things move along slowly, I may throw up my hands in a moment of weakness.  So today, my message to myself is that ANYTHING is doable for such a short time as 9 months. 

I guess that will be my Wednesday mantra...

Exercise today:  30 minutes on the stationary bike.  It went so fast, I actually worried that my timer might be broken.