|
Aug. 17, 2006
Ordinary things...
Do you ever just watch your kids do the most ordinary thing and find yourself starin' in awe?
I was watchin' Carissa the other day while she was eatin'. Just eatin' her lunch, you know? No big deal. But there was just somethin' about it that made me stare with wonder. She's so big, she's so self-sufficient in so many ways. She's this incredible and awesome creation of God.
Then I was watchin' Connor settin' the table. His face was so intent as he counted out all the forks, spoons and knives and put them all in their proper places. He's done this a million times, but I just couldn't help but stare. I even got a bit teary eyed because I just felt all my love for that little guy well up right then and there.
Then Bryce was talkin' to me. I don't even remember what we were chattin' about. But right in the middle I just sort of zoned out and watched him talk to me. The way his eyes lit up when he said somethin' that he thought was funny (I did have the presence of mind to laugh obligingly because I really had no idea of what he'd just said). Again, my thoughts were focused on how much of a blessin' this young man is to me. How much I love him and want for him. How totally amazed I am to see the man in him overtakin' the boy in him. It's fascinatin'.
I hope that my kids feel that enormity of my love for them. I'm not so good at always showing them how much I cherish every moment, the ordinary and the extraordinary. I suppose I'm feelin' a little sappy, maybe it's the hormones or something (I am, afterall, 32 weeks along now). I just can't imagine my life without any of them, each offerin' this whole other dimension and perspective in life that I never knew before. There are times when I got snippy and impatient. There are times when my flesh feels like screamin', "Can I just get a moment of peace??!!" But you know, just about every single time is because I'm the problem, not my kids. I've either gotten my priorities out of whack or I've been lazy about consistent discipline or some other foolishness/selfishness on my part that has nothin' to do with my kids.
I learn so much about God through my relationship with my kids. I was considerin' Hebrews 12:11 the other day, it reads: "Now
no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous:
nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." You know, I wonder if part of the unpleasantness isn't directed at the one administerin' the chastenin', 'cause it sure does hurt my heart when I have to come face to face with the fact that my children inherited somethin' dreadful from their Momma, her sinful nature. It makes me wonder how much it must hurt God's heart when He must chasten us too, except in His case, He has to face that which we did not inherit from Him which He never intended us to have, our sinful nature. Nevertheless, He endures the unpleasantness of chastening us because He loves us and desires to see His work complete in us: righteousness. I realized that by withholdin' correction wasn't protectin' their "little egos", but protectin' my own selfish desires. If I really want what is best for them, then I must be willin' to endure and persist in order to see them walkin' in the light of God's truth. I love 'em too much to ignore this responsibility. If my heart takes flight in just the simple things, like eatin' lunch, settin' the table or a casual chat, how much more so will it soar when I see each of them in Heaven with me?
3 John 1:4 "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth."
Oh praise be the day when my children join me in Glory.
|
| •
Post A Comment! •
Send to a Friend!
|
Comments
|
|
|
|
