In the 6 years I've been homeschooling and the 3 different areas of the state I have homeschooled in, I have found that no two homeschooling groups are alike.  However, each one I have been a part of has served a purpose in my life and the lives of my children at that particular time. 

If you are in a large city, your choices may be so numerous you find yourself overwhelmed.  Likewise, you may be in such a rural area that your choices are limited at best and quite possibly non-existant.

So, what's a homeschool mom to do when it comes to discerning which homeschool group is right for her and her family or if she decides to venture out and start one of her own?

First of all, pray about it.  Specifically, pray as to how God would have you order your homeschooling life.  Ask Him to reveal to you what is truly important THIS homeschooling year and during this SEASON.  When we first moved here, I prayed for guidance and direction.  What specifically did God have in store for us?  While He did not reveal all that would happen to us in the year that followed (the death of a child and the impending birth of another, a job promotion for my husband and several freelance writing opportunities for myself), I did find that the path He was clearly leading us to was one that involved a VISION.  I knew the Lord wanted me in a serious homeschool group that was less about academics and more about a long-term goal.  Isn't it wonderful the Lord knows exactly what is in store for you and knows exactly what you need when!

Secondly, you need to ask yourself some serious (and tough) questions pertaining to what kind of group the Lord would have you be a part of. 

• Are you looking for support for yourself?  Does that mean regular Mom's Only nights or does it mean something more along the lines of mentoring?  Will you be edified during these times and come back refreshed or will you need more "support" than these groups can offer.  Are you suffering from Me-Time mania?

• Are you looking for a playgroup atmosphere for your children?  If so, is it truly a healthy atmosphere or will you find yourself buying into the whole "socialism" thing that seems so prevalent these days in order to stick with a playgroup that is eating into your time and not offering positive influences?

• Are you looking for a group that offers classes/tutoring, etc?  Are you unable to teach certain subjects?  Are they truly important?  Are you feeling inadequate and need to deal with that feeling?

• Are you looking for all of these rolled up into one group?  If so, how much time are you willing to commit to these outside-the-home activities?  How can you refrain from spending all day every day away from home in order to be involved in every single activity the group offers?  Do you know the art of saying, "NO"?

Next, I would encourage you to take these questions and your thoughts about these questions (and others) to your husband.  I suggest bringing them to your husband at this stage in the game rather than earlier because oftentimes we as homeschool moms unintentionally clutter our lives and thoughts.  If we work toward clearing some of that clutter ahead of time and then presenting our thoughts to our husbands, he won't have to wade through all that clutter to get to the meat of the matter.  Spare the guy...he has enough to worry about. 

When you go to your husband, be prepared for him to suggest a completely different direction.  Be open to his leading.  Men are often very good at seeing the big picture while we women dwell on the little things that make up the big picture.  Remember, he is the head of your household and may have definite ideas about the direction he would like for the family to head.  The two of you can brainstorm from there.  A common goal is a wonderful thing.  Make sure you and your husband share a common goal in homeschooling...they are his children too!

NOW, research your options.  It is very difficult to change gears when you already have your heart set on a certain thing.  Narrow your homeschooling vision and THEN look for a homeschooling group that works to further this vision.  Does the type of homeschooling group you believe the Lord would have you be a part of not exist?  Consider the possibility that He is leading you to start a group that serves that purpose.  That is exactly how the homeschooling group I am a part of started.  One woman who caught a vision, prayed about it, brainstormed with her husband about it and eventually compiled an awesome amount of material to share with other moms.  I come away from each monthly meeting refreshed and rejuvenated!

One quick word of caution...do not lock yourself into a particular group until you have been a few times and are sure this is where the Lord would have you.  No group should require immediate upfront committment.  You should "try before you buy."