About a month ago, I sat at my daughter's grave and talked aloud to her and to God. I do not know if our dear ones in Heaven can truly hear us, but it brings me comfort to speak aloud to my baby girl. I told her how much I was hurting, how much I miss her, how much I love her. I also asked her if it were within her abilities, and if it was alright with her, could she ask the Lord to send us another baby. Our arms are so empty.

I went on to ask the Lord to consider me. I told Him that I did not know if He believed us to be truly ready for a new baby, but if it was His will, I would gladly accept a new little blessing.

Shortly thereafter, we learned that the Lord had indeed blessed us again! A new little babe to join us at Christmas time! A child to fill our aching arms.

With this blessing comes many emotions and thoughts...too many to put into words here. I am sure as this pregnancy progresses, I will have many things to share with you.

I continue to grieve the loss of my dear sweet baby girl who would have been 10 months old on the 4th. I find myself continually counting heads and knowing there is someone missing. I want her to be here to share in the joy of this new life, but where she is is exactly where the Lord wants her. So I must rejoice in this new life wholeheartedly. This IS His best for me. Though one is "missing" and will always be "missing", there is a future, there is hope. The Lord continues to show this to me over and over again. Blessed be the name of the Lord!

It seems to me that for the Scheduled Family the basics are often a no-brainer.  You need only to add a block of time that says something like Morning Chores, and the entire family knows that means Brush Teeth, Get Dressed, Make Bed, etc.  This is the beauty of the Scheduled Family.  However, the Routine Family tends to have a bit more trouble in this area.  I am not sure why that is, it has just been my experience as such.  So, this post is more for the Routine Family.

To establich the basics, see some of the tips in the previous post.  You really do need to practice the basics for quite some time before they will become the basics.  I can remember when I first implemented Table Chores.  I had high hopes that within a week, they would do them automatically.  Boy, was I wrong!  It took a year and a half!  And still, I must occasionally remind them of something they missed!  So, do not become disheartened!  Persevere!!!

Once you have the basics in place--things like a simple morning routine, afternoon routine, and bedtime routine--you can consider adding in routines that repeat weekly.  This is how I get my house cleaning done.  When I had a smaller family, my weekly routine was much less involved.  I cleaned my home thoroughly on Monday, did up all my laundry, and coasted the rest of the week.  I found this stopped working after Baby #3.  But, I do want to include a little more about this method of routine since small families deserve just as much attention as large ones...

For a smaller family, a one-day-a-week cleaning spree is often enough to keep the house in working order the rest of the week.  You simply get it all done and then maintain.  Since the weekend tends to destroy a house no matter what size your family is, Monday is the perfect day to regroup.  In fact, I would highly encourage you to never schedule appointments or out-of-the-house activities on Mondays (yes, I know Routine Families are not known for their ability to committ to something like this, but please consider the "why" behind my reasoning.)  If you use your Monday to reassemble your home, your week will go much smoother.  Trust me!

So, on Mondays I would clean the house.  I did this in the morning because I was schooling my oldest child in the afternoon during his sister's nap.  I will elaborate more on exactly HOW I cleaned house.  For now, simply tidy up.  Just a simple tidy will do wonders for a home!  No dusting required!  I also did all the laundry on Mondays.  (wow, if only I could manage that now!)  So, we started the week w/ full drawers and closets of clean clothes--great feeling!

Tuesday and Wednesday, I pretty much coasted.  The house really didn't require much from me those days.  These are the days that work best for making appointments if you can manage that.  The house is in good working order and can stand for you to be away from it.

Now, by Thursday, I usually needed to readdress the mess.  There were some things that needed attention since I had been away the previous days.  But, quite often, the mess only took an hour or less to completely fix.  It was sort of like a mini-clean, and it was enough to get me through the weekend.  And that was how I did it with 2 children.

For the larger family, you will more than likely need to break up your cleaning spree into bite-size days.  My week is loosely based on the Large Family Logistics way of doing things.  Recently, I heard Kim has re-opened her site, but from what I can tell, she is still not posting regularly.  You can check it out HERE. 

So, here is what we do for our weekly cleaning routine:

Monday = Laundry (try to do all of it and then maintain throughout the week) & Dusting

Tuesday = All Floors

Wednesday = Bathrooms

Thursday = Projects

Friday = Clean out Van & Finish any outstanding items

Saturday = Prepare for Sunday

Sunday = Set aside for Rest and Worship!

This has proven to be a very doable weekly routine for us and one that is not too time-intensive.  I still prefer to do all my cleaning in the morning with the children's help, and then school in the afternoon.  I divy up all the chores that are required to get the job done onto a dry erase board that hangs in my kitchen.  At this point in time, only my oldest 2 (ages 10 and 7) are listed on the board w/ chores beside their names.  The "littles" (ages 2 & 3) are given tasks at random according to what I think they can handle.  By the way, this board is not the place for the every day chores.  This is the place for the Day-of-the-Week cleaning and anything extra I see that needs to be done.  All of this happens AFTER our morning routine.   We all work through our lists, erasing as we go and usually have it knocked it out by about 11:00 a.m.  A quick example of what the board might look like would be:

Mom -

Tidy bedroom

Tidy Family Room

Vacumn entire house

10 yo Son -

Tidy bedroom

Tidy living room

Sweep/mop dining room and kitchen

Sweep storage areas

7 yo Daughter -

Tidy bedroom

Brush down stairs

Sweep/mop entryway

Sweep/mop downstairs bathroom

So, that gives you an idea as to what is on our list.  Your list will obviously be different b/c your home is different.  And remember, moving beyond the baics takes time and patience.  Finding a workable plan is not an easy task.  You often have to just try it one way and see how it goes, make adjustments, and try it again.  If you see something in your day that is a problem area, figure out a way to solve it.  For instance, is your house always a mess by the time dad comes home even though it is neat and tidy in the morning?  Implement a 4:30 pm mad-dash cleaning session to get the house ready for Daddy.  In fact, before you start doing a full-blown weekly routine, start out by implementing bits and pieces.  Do your 4:30 Mad Dash every day for a week.  Is it working?  Do you like the results?  If so, keep it and move forward.  Don't try to add every single thing I listed all in one week...you will burn out...especially if some piece of it doesn't quite fit your family.

So, a quick recap...

*Figure out what kind of family you are...Schedule or Routine.

*Find a daily basic plan that works for your family.

*Once you have practiced your plan for a sufficient amount of time, add in a weekly repeating routine one component at a time.

*If you find something that just is not working for your family, revamp it and try again.  Give it time.  Don't become discouraged!  Persevere!!!

Now, for some ideas to get you started...

One option for Scheduled Families is a simple Daily Planner.  These work great for older children and parents alike, and they are compact enough to go wherever you go.  Simply fill in each time slot with your to-do's for the week (I suggest weekly for the Scheduled Family rather than daily because you naturally prefer your week to have a nice flow or pattern to it).  As you develop a workable schedule, you will need only to transfer the previous week into the new week.  Leave the planner lying open on the table during the day for quick glances at what is next.  Anything out of the ordinary (ie. school projects, mending something in particular, picking up your mother from the airport, etc) can be penciled in without too much disruption to your daily schedule.

Another great option for Schedule-lovin' families is something like Managers of Their Homes.  This type of schedule is put together in 30 minute blocks of time.  You have a neatly set time for nearly everything you would like to accomplish throughout your day.  You are able to schedule in everyone else's day as well.  All of this is put into a color coded wall chart with blocks that can easily be changed and moved around.  If you find something that does not work well in the time frame you originally placed it in or something in your life suddenly changes, you simply move it.   

But, if you are a Routine person, MOTH is more than likely NOT for you.  In fact, I would gently suggest that it could quite possibly make you feel very badly about yourself and your ability to run a household properly.  Mrs. Maxwell never intended for this to be the case, so please do not think I am suggesting she believes her schedule is the only way to run a household.  She is merely trying to help other mamas out there manage their day with something that worked well for her household.  But, the fact of the matter is that some of our lives do not fit neatly in 30 minute boxes.  My life being a case in point. 

So, what are some things that a Routine family can try?

A Daily Planner may work for you as well (or just a piece of notebook paper for that matter), but with two differences from the one kept by the Scheduled Family.  Yours should not be marked with times.  The other difference is that your routine should be written out DAILY, not weekly.  You simply take everything that must be accomplished during that day, write it down in a good working order, and cross off as you go.

Another suggestion comes from my friend, SarahLynne.  You can read about it HERE.  The basic idea is that you write eveything down on seperate notecards.  When you have accomplished the item listed, you move it from the TO DO section to the DONE section.  This is a great option for the children.  Even those who can't read can have picture cards that tell them what to do next.  I've incorporated this into my daily routine by putting two magnetized chip clips on my refrigerator...one is TO DO and one is DONE.  It feels so good to move the cards from one side to the other.  I use this mainly as a way to remember all those daily things that if allowed to become sidetracked, I will simply forget to do:  taking vitamins, giving the kids their vitamins, switching over laundry, dethawing dinner, etc.

Since I have added CAVE to my list of places I have nursed, I thought I would take the time to write out interesting places I have nursed...

CHURCH

CUB SCOUTS

ON A TRAIN

ON A BOAT

SPIRIT OF THE DANCE SHOW IN BRANSON

WHILE MAKING JEWELRY IN A BEAD SHOP IN COLORADO

HALFWAY UP A MOUNTAIN BESIDE A WATERFALL (my favorite!)

LEANING OVER THE CAR SEAT (not my favorite!)

WHILE REHEARSING FOR A BROADWAY REVUE

WHILE TAKING MY DRIVER'S LICENSE TEST (Thanks, I had totally forgot about that one!)

I know there are more, but I'll have to keep brainstorming!  Anyone else have some fun (or not so fun) places they have nursed babies???

This year, we decided to branch out and spend our big vacation some place other than Colorado.  (We still took a quick Colorado vacation around Labor Day).

We chose South Dakota.  Why?  The reasons were numerous:

1) DH was born there (Sioux Falls) and moved when he was 2 wks old.  He's never been back to see the state that he lists on every piece of paperwork that asks where he was born.

2) The children are studying the early years of our great nation, and so a trip to see 4 President's head carved in a mountain seemed appropriate.

3) My parents visited the Black Hills when our oldest was a little tyke and brought him back a rock.

4) We had heard the Black Hills were beautiful, esp during autumn.

So, we loaded up the van and we drove to Custer, SD.  We had an awesome family cabin that was half price b/c it was off-season (Calamity Peak Lodge).  We took quite a bit of food w/ us and cooked several meals there.  We took in a ton of sights:  Mount Rushmore, Wind Cave, The Mammoth Site, Crazy Horse, Custer State Park.  We even drove on into Wyoming!

A few quick stories about our adventure:

*We traveled the entire Custer State Park on a week long pass.  While there, we saw a ton of animals just roaming around.  They were on the road, they in the ditches, they were even surrounding our van!  We had several wild donkeys poking their heads in the van windows, so like good tourists, we gave them a pet!

*I love caves, so a trip to one of the caves in the area was a must!  We chose Wind Cave.  It was about an hour and a half long walking tour full of stairs heading mostly in the downward direction.  I packed  baby on me, and the other 4 had to walk.  When we lined up w/ the other people to go into the cave and the park ranger informed us that we would be LOCKED in this cave, I am sure there were a few people who looked at us w/ our 5 littles and thought "AHHHHHHHHH"!!!!!!!  One woman did say, "You are brave taking 4 kids in a cave w/ no way out."  I politely informed her that there were actually 5.  To which she exclaimed, "You are crazy!"  And, yes, there was a moment when I thought I was going to chicken out, but I didn't and all was well--even when they turned out ALL the lights!  In fact, it was another couple w/ a toddler about the same age as ours who had trouble--I felt so bad for them, b/c I am sure they were mortified (b/c I would have been), but their little one soon calmed down and you would have never guessed there were any small children on the tour.  We even had an older woman tell us on the way out that we had a beautiful family.  It is comments like that that make my day!

Before the tour, the park ranger told us a story of a man named Jim losing his hat down the entrance of Wind Cave and how it was never seen again.  Well, our 3 yo spent most of the tour LOOKING for the hat!  She kept saying, "Nope, Jim's hat not here."  She also was given a flashlight at the start of the tour, so she kept telling me that if I got scardey and needed her, she would bring me the light.

Baby got hungry on the trip, so I can add CAVE to my list of places I have nursed!

*At the Mammouth Site, our 9 yo helped the tour guide w/ her demonstrations and even led the group while she took my husband and the littles in the stroller down the wheelchair ramp.  She came up to us after the tour was over and had tears in her eyes.  She said it gave her goosebumps to be around a family such as ours b/c she sees many families and sees that they have no boundries and the children are not blessings.  I didn't think we had done all that well (the 1 yo constantly wanted out of the stroller, and reasoning w/ a 1 yo is next to impossible), so her comments were a relief.  I often wonder what people do think when they see us coming.  I probably don't want to know!

I would definitely recommend The Black Hills as a vacation destination!  And I would definitely recommend the off-season.  The Hills are beautiful this time of year and the price is right!

My husband goes around singing this song ALL the time.  Honestly, I've never actually heard this song...other than from out of the mouth of my own dear husband.  He sings it anytime anyone talks about getting a haircut, needing a haircut, just got a haircut, etc.  Well, lately it has been ME who has been tossing around the idea of getting a haircut.  However, the thought is absolutely TERRIFYING.

You see, about 6 years ago, I cut my hair short.  REALLY short.  It was spikey in the back and a little longer in the front.  It took massive amounts of DiFi Dstruct to keep it in place.  DH's cousin was in beauty school at the time and that particular haircut was all the rage, so I did it.  DH was gone on deployment and I was in need of some entertainment--getting my hair and nails done all the time was my entertainment.  But, after a bit, I began to feel convicted to grow my hair out.  You may wonder why...well, the reason is a simple one.  I was getting sassy.  VERY, VERY sassy. 

Unfortunately, I struggle greatly w/ the link between appearance and attitude.  What I look like has a profound influence on how I behave.  (Someday I will blog about my days wearing dresses only and how THAT particular look affected my behavior and attitude).  This particular haircut sent me into the realm of sassy-mouthed teenager.  So, God dealt w/ me.  I grew it out, but in a moment of weakness, cut it off again---I cried all the way from the beauty shop home.  I started over that day and have kept it long ever since.  I do cut several inches off every year or so (I have extremely thick hair that grows extremely fast.  It ends up giving me a headache if I let it grow too long and don't have it thinned), but it has stayed rather long all these years. 

In addition to that, it has truly become a part of who I am.  I feel as if it is part of my crunchy, granola mom wardrobe--the chopsticks in my hair or the messy half bun, the bohemian shirts, the wooden & stone jewelry, the baby in the sling--it all works together--it's all part of me.  I have even made peace w/ the greyish-white streaks that have been slowly making their appearance since my early 20's.  It goes too--call it natural highlighting!

I know DH did not like the short haircut (he has told me so since), and I know he doesn't dislike the long hair, but he has been hinting for quite a long time that he REALLY REALLY liked the haircut I had when he and I first met.  (mind you, that was in high school!)  What was that haircut, you may ask???  It was a chin-length bob.  AND my hair was blonde--not brown as it is now.  AND my hair was straight, not curly as it has become since the children have been born.  But, nonetheless, DH would every now and again say, "Sometime why don't you cut your hair in a bob again.  I'd like to see that."

Until recently, I had just ignored his comments.  I liked my hair long.  Wouldn't short hair send me back into the sassiness I lived in before?  Besides, hadn't God convicted me to grow it out???  But, guess what...God has been working on me again.  If this is truly something my husband wants to see on me, then in submission, I should cut it.  I am not the same person I was 5 years ago, and neither am I the same person I was in high school (praise the LORD!). 

Through the conviction of growing my hair out, God dealt w/ my sassiness.  Now it is time for me to work through a different issue by the conviction to cut it.  That issue is my reliance on my hair to make me who I am.  I am afraid of not being me w/o the long hair.  My hair has become so much a part of me that I don't feel as if I can do w/o it.  And as silly as this sounds, I am almost afraid that w/o it, I won't be as crunchy.  In fact, there was even a time when I thought long-hair made you more spiritual--yep, working through that one too!

And then there is the issue of actually having to fix my hair! LOL  That is another thing that has happened in the past few years--a pony-tail or messy bun is quite common unless I'm going out.  I don't wear makeup real often either.  I know dh likes to see me put together, and I feel better when I am dressed nicely and have my hair fixed.  Cutting my hair in a bob would force me to fix it.  I couldn't just throw it up in a pony-tail every day.  Of course, once you fix your hair, you feel like putting on something a little nicer to wear, and once you do that, you might as well put on some makeup. lol

But all these fears pale in comparison to the sadness I feel at the thought that my dear sweet husband may somewhere deep down inside, where even he may not realize it, feel as though he has lost the woman he married.  He loves the granola mom I have become over the years, but that mom is quite often so wrapped up in being a MOM that she forgets to be a WIFE.  He used to flirt w/ the girl w/ the bob haircut.  She used to flirt back.

I truly believe God is calling me back into my wifely role.  I have neglected that person of late.  By cutting my hair, I am signalling a refresh.  I am outwardly showing my husband that I am committed to him, not just his children.  I am still that crunchy granola mom slingin' her babies, but I am ALSO that crunchy granola WIFE who's lovin' her husband!

Remember these guys from The Cat in the Hat? 

Well, they live at my house!

This house is MUCH bigger than our last house and I am forever "losing" the children--especially the toddlers (aka Thing 1 & Thing 2).  The quiet that I so enjoy is NOT a good thing, but it often takes me a bit to realize WHY things are quiet...it's b/c Thing 1 & Thing 2 are somewhere destroying something.

Here is a glimpse of their handiwork just this morning...

They started in the main bathroom.  Remember they "cleaned" my bathroom yesterday w/ Citra-Solv (did I mention this house is TOO big?!)  Well, today, they cleaned the tub w/ ALL the soap.  They also soaped themselves w/ their clothes on.  I was nursing the baby when Thing 1 came in and said, "My shirt is wet.  I all bubbly."  It did not occur to me to ask WHY she was "ALL BUBBLY," but shortly thereafter, my husband, who had been reading on the couch, walked into the bathroom and all I heard was, "Oh No!"  Since I was still nursing (thank you, Lord!), he got the job of cleaning them up.

About an hour later, while we are all tidying up the house, they disappeared again.  Once again, it is my husband who finds them in the craft room.  They had unloaded ALL my snaps.  Now, this was no small task.  The 500 snaps were all neatly packaged by color and by size.  Thing 1 & Thing 2 had to ever so carefully dump them all on the floor and then systematically mix them all up, so they became a beautiful jumble of color and size.  I'm sure it must have taken them all of 30 seconds.  Thing 1, ever ready w/ a comment on her behavior, says, "I make a mess."  REALLY?!  DH wouldn't even attempt to tackle this one, and called for me.  I stood there for a bit seething, I mean pondering, before slowly backing up and shutting the door--not today.

As I was backing out of the room, I noticed a smell I have smelled before...it is the smell of stain remover.  I turn to look in the laundry room and there they are, Thing 1 spraying the laundry room floor with Shout while Thing 2 looks on in admiration.  I shuffle them out of the laundry room in a flurry of reprimands and begin the frantic search for a baby gate--anything to keep these  terrific toddlers out of that area of the basement! 

I find the baby gate in the garage and put it up, only to come upstairs and find Thing 1 has stolen a banana and has given part of it to her brother.  I take away the bananas from Adam and Eve, I mean Thing 1 & Thing 2, and discipline them.  Thing 1, being the instigator of this crime spree, is put in a chair under the watchful eye of her older brother until I can get a few things done so I can go to the Y and breathe.

I know there are naysayers out there who will say I am just getting what I deserve for having such a large family so close in age, but lest you think these children are a burden to me, let me ask you this...aren't you terribly bored w/o a Thing 1 & Thing 2 at YOUR house???

Crunchy.  Yep, that's me.  I breastfeed, cloth diaper, eat whole grains, buy organic, drink raw milk, use herbs, and generally stay far, far away from medical intervention.  In fact, I can count on one hand the number of times our family has been to a doctor (outside of the OB's office) this year and last year combined.  Not that I hate doctors--some of my favorite people just happen to be doctors by trade, but b/c I prefer to treat as best I can at home b/f running to the dr's office for an antibiotic or some such thing.

So, WHY would I choose to go to an OB to have my babies when I could homebirth w/ a midwife--or at the very least, birth in a free-standing clinic w/ a midwife?

It all comes down to a simple phrase a dear La Leche League leader said to me as she helped me work through the trauma of my c-section:

Have the best birth YOU can have.

(For more information on C-section trauma and what you can do to avoid another c-section, click on the link below:

ICAN : International Cesarean Awareness Network)

You see, I sought out this doctor specifically b/c I had heard she had a fantastic VBAC rate.  I dearly wanted a VBAC and she was confidant I could do it.  Sure enough, 2.5 yrs after my first child was born via emergency c-section, we welcomed baby #2 via VBAC.  It was a beautiful experience--and a healing one.

Shortly after her birth, we felt convicted to leave our family planning up to the Lord.  Now, at this point I considered a midwife, but I had 2 things standing in my way.

1.  I was a VBAC and now carried the risk of a uterine rupture.

2.  I had not yet labored w/o the help of an epidural.

Honestly, #2 worried me WAY more than #1.  I had always wanted to go naturally and med-free, but w/ a c-section that is impossible, and w/ the VBAC, when I wasn't dilating, the epidural was a last-ditch effort to avoid a c-section (and it worked).  Besides all of this, I was attached to my doctor.  Here was someone who had helped me get what I had wanted.  When M was born, she was right there cheering me on.  But would I ever be able to have the med-free birth in a hospital setting?

I had a rather long break between baby #2 and baby #3--back to back deployments and a miscarriage that resulted in a D&C.  I had plenty of time to think about exactly what I wanted and how to get there.  A friend of mine was preparing for a Bradley birth, but I was skeptical.  I had taken Lamaze twice and it had done nothing for me, so what would yet another method do?  She shared her book w/ me and tried to explain many of the concepts, but I only absorbed it in cynical bits and pieces.

I went into labor w/ baby #3 determined to do my best to get a med-free birth.  However, the ONLY thing I did to help my cause was to get a hep lock instead of a full-blown IV.  This was b/c I really knew nothing about laboring positions and I was "worried" about what the hospital staff would think of me getting out of bed. *gasp*

Well, it became apparent rather quickly that this labor was going to be rough.  Later I found out that baby was posterior and that is what caused the incredibly excruciating pain that had me begging for an epidural 12 hrs into it.  It was then I figured I would NEVER have a med-free birth.  I just couldn't seem to pull it off.

7 months later I found I was pg again.  Even though I had lost hope of a med-free birth, my husband and I still took a tour of a local midwifery clinic.  We were impressed, but we could see the trepidation on the assistant's face when we told her I had never not had an epidural.  In the end, I went to my OB b/c by this point she had seen me through 2 miscarraiges and 2 VBACs and she was more than willing to accomodate whatever hair-brained idea I came up with (which included not inducing against hospital's advisement.)  I had a hard time imagining not having her delivering children.

As I began to labor w/ baby #4, the same friend who had now had 2 successful Bradley births (both in hospitals) came by to take me to her house and give me a massage while I waited for my husband to arrive to take me to the hospital.  While we there, she talked me through a lot of the breathing/relaxation techniques she had learned.  She massaged my belly hard w/ each contraction and told me over and over how I could do this.  I was amazed at the difference.  When my husband picked me up, I gave him a crash course on my crash course, but on the way to hospital, I lost my resolve.  Was there any way this really could work?

To make an incredibly long story shorter, I labored for a mere 3 hrs at the hospital w/ my doctor and my husband by my side.  I was up, down, and all around in that L&D room.  The end result was a 10 pound, 22" boy born completely med-free!!!  Both my doctor and my husband played such a huge role in this birth that I can no longer imagine going to anyone else.  I AM having the best birth I can have!

For about 5 wks now I have been dealing w/ the itchy scratchies off and on.  Pregnancy usually carries with it the usual skin stretching and dry skin issues, but this goes WAY beyond that! 

When I was pg w/ K, I had some issues, but when I changed bath soaps and quit any lotions, I ended up just fine.  Easy fix!  But this time, no such luck.

I asked around on the MOMYS board and here are the 2 "diagnoses" I ended up w/:

PUPP

Although, the symptoms didn't quite match up, I thought this could very well be it.  I sort of treated it as if it were this, but niggling in the back of my mind was the warning that it could be this...

Cholestasis

I knew how very serious this could be and the itching really did supersede ANYTHING I had ever felt before, so at my last dr's appt, I told my dr. about it and she ordered the test right away.  She really felt as if PUPP were not the issue b/c I was not broken out anywhere.

Well, I got the results back, everything checked out normal.  A relief, but at the same time a disappointment...here I sit itching for NO GOOD REASON!

The Prognosis:  Like all pregnancy related symptoms, once baby is born, I am sure all prior itching will disappear along w/ the memory of the prior itching.  Thus making it easier for me to forget just how uncomfortable pregnancy can be.  Thus making me more likely to do it again in the near future! LOL

They are finished!!!!

I am very pleased w/ the way they turned out and so are the girls! 

The pattern is McCall's 4746.  I bought the pattern over a year ago along w/ the fabric and then just waited until the girls could fit into it.  (I'm not much for altering)

It features petal sleeves, a high waist, long, full skirt and a zipper closure in back.  The girls love to just twirl and twirl in them.

So, now that my big project is over....what next???

We've been noticing that the cat food container that sits out on our porch seems to be emptying itself rather quickly.  Then, we started finding the container on the ground below the porch.  Finally, a couple of days ago, my husband put a lock on the the container and we thought that would be the end of it.

Not so, my friend.

Tonight as I was blogging away due to my inability to sleep (gotta love that last trimester! lol), I heard the cat food container being shoved off the porch and rolled around on the ground.

I stealthily walked across the living room and flipped on the porch light.  I peaked out the window only to come face to face w/ our thief...

He looks well-fed, doesn't he? (Notice how the lock did nothing to stop this little guy from literally breaking the door off and reaching his naughty little paws into the container?!)

I recently read in No Greater Joy magazine how men just do not understand a woman's need for a good cry every now and then.  Thankfully, this is something my husband has learned after nearly 11 years of marriage---sometimes I just NEED a good cry.

Tonight was one of those times.

I had been feeling it coming on since early this afternoon, but kept thinking if I just got out of the house, I would be ok.  After getting the baby to bed, I went and treated myself to a peanut buster parfait (yes, I know--real nutritious!) and a talk w/ a good friend, but still I felt "out of sorts."

I had a hard Braxton-Hicks on my way home that radiated to my back and left aching.  I managed to get myself into the house and into the bed, where I lay in pain for a while b/f falling asleep.  I was probably only asleep 5 minutes when the baby woke up needing to be changed--no one else could hear him b/c the bedrooms are on the opposite end of our ranch style house.  By the time I got him changed and back in bed, my husband had called for the children to get ready for bed.  At this point in time, my 6 yo daughter did something that brought me to my breaking point.  I began to cry and I've been crying off and on ever since.  My husband finally just went to bed--giving me a pat on the back, a hug, and a "I'm sorry, but this is probably just what you need."  I agreed and sent him on his way, so I could return to my sniffles.

You may be thinking, "What a pitiful sight you must have been," but you know what?... It felt good.  It was what I needed.  I know once I'm done, I'll be able to face the world again.

No peanut buster parfait could ever do that!

Everyone seems to have a point where the number of children you have brings you to a Crisis Point.  It is that moment you realize NOTHING will ever be the same.  It is that day you wake up and realize life cannot go on the way it has been.  For many of us, it was the day we became bonified MOMYS (Mothers Of Many Young Siblings--meaning you have 4 children 8 and under.)

There is also a Crossover Point.  A point where you realize that you have acheived a certain amount of success w/ what seemed like an insurmountable number of children and could go on to have an indefinite amount of children w/o batting an eye.  (Well, maybe an occasionaly bat here and there, but definitely not an eyes-closed-fumbling-in-the-dark kind of bat of the eye!)

For me, this number was number 4.  I was so excited to finally be achieving true MOMYS status (I had been dreaming of the day for 5 years!), that I never really grasped the REASON there is a MOMYS digest and forum in the first place.  Running a household with 4 small children is a whole different ballgame.  It is twice the number of children that most Americans have.  Most cookbooks are written w/ the typical family in mind.  Most appliances are built w/ the typical family in mind.  Most organizational websites/books/magazine articles are written w/ the typical family in mind.  When you have 4 children you are suddenly FAR from the typical family.  With 3, you can still pretend you are a small family and make most recipes work and not tax your appliances too much and even find the average organizational tips helpful.  But once number 4 is here, things that worked for years suddenly no longer work.  Recipes are just too small.  Appliances can't handle the workload.  Organizational tips become laughable.

For a time after I brought number 4 home, I wondered what I had done.  I wondered if I would ever find a groove.  I realized NOTHING I had done before was working.  I couldn't possibly wash one day a week and get by with it.  I was scared to go out of the house even with my husband along to help, let alone attend a homeschool function ALONE with all 4!  I couldn't even get dinner on the table w/o a series of minor crises.  I was stressed and scared.  

To quote my friend Sarah, I "disappeared for a while."  I layed low, waiting for the storm to pass b/c I had no idea what else to do.  Survive, Survive, Survive became my motto.  When baby K was about 4 months old, I finally realized I had to Live, Live, Live.  I knew the way I was doing things had to change, but every time I assessed the running of the household, I would become overwhelmed. 

And then I became pregnant with number 5.

What once was a crisis became a turning point.  No longer could I sit in indecision--I had to stand up and get moving.  Even if it turned out to be the wrong direction, at least I was heading somewhere.  I could always turn around or take a different path if I saw that what I was doing wasn't working.  I had to start asking questions of other mothers who had been there and done that.  I had to find what worked for them and try those suggestions out.  I had to stop digging my heels in to keep from sliding backward, and actually start putting one foot in front of the other and move forward. 

So, this is where I am now.  Assessing life as a LARGE SMALL FAMILY and moving toward life as a SMALL LARGE FAMILY. 

I doubt that I'll ever feel as if I've "arrived."  My friend with 9 children continues to pick the brain of her friend with 12 children.  I will always find something new to learn.  There will always be little tidbits of information to gather from those who have been in the trenches.  However, I hope someday to get a call from a young mother who wants to pick my brain about how I run my household b/c she likes what she sees.

These are the words that greeted me this morning!  My 6 yo has been counting down the days until Spring for about 2 wks now.  If I were the Betty Crocker mom I would like to be, we would have celebrated w/ spring cookies or a cake and a walk in the park or something of that nature, but instead I decluttered the girls' room!

This was very rewarding for me and the girls were thrilled as well--especially since they didn't see all that left their room to soon take up residence in either the trash can or the thrift store!

My 6 yo is eclectic, a free-spirit, a pack rat.  Everything is beautiful to her and everything must be kept indefinitely.  Her walls and door are covered in pictures she has colored or drawings she has done, or sentences she has carefully written out.  There are ribbons from discarded presents adorning her walls and 2 strips of rainbow colored fleece have been fashioned into a cross taped next to her bed.  Every photo I allow her to have from my scrapbooking cast-offs either goes into her own little scrapbook, or finds their way onto her shelves, walls, and anywhere else she can shove them.  There are rocks and bits of colored glass and pottery that are stashed away in makeshift boxes and pencils and paper are tucked in secret places where her 2 yo sister won't find them (she hopes).  Clutter reigns supreme and she is the queen of this cluttered domain!

But today the Regent took over for a bit--just to set the queen back on track.

I rearranged and reorganized and got rid of things that were just taking up space.  It should be much easier for her to clean her room now.

The funny thing was, as I was doing this, the 2 yo kept peaking in to say, "Don't touch sissy's stuff!"  Hmmmm....me thinks the queen hath a little spy...and I fear, a little prote'ge'!

Friday night, the 6 yo and the 1 yo started throwing up...2 days later the 9 yo and my husband started in...the next morning, I was struck.  Here we are on Tuesday, mending...I think. 

DH and I haven't been sick at the same time in over 6 years and at that point in time we only had 1 child and I was pregnant with #2.  Now, we have 4 children and I am pregnant with #5...a whole different ballgame!

Since we don't live near family, we had to go it alone.  Thankfully, today a lady from church came by to help out.  She hung laundry, did dishes, cleaned out my refrigerator, and watched babies while I took a nap.  It was such a huge help!

For quite a while now, I've teased my Mom that the reason we have so many children (and desire more) is because we fully intend to take over the world one child at a time.  I'm not sure she finds the humor in my comment, but I wonder if she sees the truth in it?

We've all heard the saying, "The hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world."  Some want to read this as meaning that mamas rule the world, but what it really means is the influence we have on our children will follow them into adulthood--good or bad.

As my blog title suggests, our family is committed to RAISING ARROWS for the Lord.  Arrows aren't terribly effective when left in the quiver.  I have to prepare these arrows to be used in battle. 

Take a look at this FOX NEWS VIDEO.

My dad died February 17th shortly after 11 am.  I was there w/ him.  It was the final breaths of a 4 year battle with the diagnosis of Alzheimers.  The end was a peaceful mix of relief and sadness. 

My father led a good life.  He was a wonderful dad.  He was an extraordinary man who never met a stranger--the number of people in attendance at the funeral was proof positive of this.

And...he was Irish.  Full-blooded.  And proud of it!

I wish I could write a blog that would do this incredible man justice, but I can't.  I won't even try.

The saying, "Winners never Quit, Quitters never Win," isn't entirely true.  I am a quitter and I am winning by making this decision.

Many of you are familiar w/ my daily struggle to make my household run.  Here is what I posted recently on MOMYS:

I've always been rather dissatisfied w/ how I run my household and after baby #4, that dissatisfaction turned into something resembling fear--a motivating fear--a fear that came as I realized that the way I did things when I only had 3 was not going to work anymore.

However, by the time #5 was on the way, I still hadn't figured out a game plan. So, this is where I am...

*Want to make an earnest effort to take time for the Lord every day--preferably in the morning b/c I feel like this would really start my day right.

*Want to be more available for my husband (which will depend on how I do w/ the next one...)

*Want to have a nice solid routine in place by the time baby comes (early July). Want this to include housecleaning, school, family time, etc. The house is really in sad condition right now b/c I have not been capable of really cleaning and decluttering (probably the bigger issue at this point). I want to get the house in order and then work from there w/ a routine.

*Want to set aside time for the children where I am more hands-on w/ them--I feel for far too long I have been guilty of just "parenting" and not "mothering".

*Want to be more disciplined in general--say "no" more often, stay away from "time wasters", get back to regularly exercising, etc.

I don't think I have bitten off more than I can chew; although, many of these things have been issues for a majority of the 10 yrs I have been married. I also know that I cannot make someone else's routine and life my own (thanks Bibs for that reminder!)

So, I guess what I am looking for is support--has anyone been where I am and managed to do these things?

I would also love to hear some ideas on how/where to start. It is somewhat like walking into a room that is wall-to-wall clutter and being overwhelmed by which box to sift through first.

God just wasn't letting me alone on this one.  Everything I read and heard and every conversation I seemed to have led back to the idea of streamlining, getting my ducks in a row, "quitting" some things, and re-focusing and re-prioritizing.

The first item that was eating at me was the cloth diapering business a friend and I started nearly a year ago.  Initially, it was a fun little hobby, a way to supplement the income.  But I found that I was spending time and money I didn't have.  I was selling one diaper, only to buy fabric of equal value (if not more).  I knew things were not right, but pride kept me from backing out.  Finally, this autumn I talked to my friend about scaling down.  She agreed, but I never felt a real peace about it.  I would cringe every time I walked by my pile of fabric and unfinished projects. 

This past weekend it was clear what needed to be done.  I needed to QUIT. 

The post on MOMYS was the beginning of my time of re-prioritizing and re-grouping.  Seeing it on paper (or screen, rather) forced me to be serious about my efforts.  After much prayer, I called my friend and laid it on the line.  I think initially she was a little shocked, but by the 2nd conversation, she agreed wholeheartedly. 

Call it the "Season of Life" I am in right now, but I know that for me the business venture had spiraled out of control.  It was taking away precious time and resources.  It was okay when I was sewing for my family and for gifts and even when I was sewing a little here and there for profit.  But, I became obsessed w/ buying fabric and notions and experimenting with this pattern and that pattern, all the while selling very little in comparison.  It was one thing that was holding me back from reaching the goals I had posted.

So, there you have it.  I am a QUITTER and PROUD of it!

For several days now I have been pondering the fact that what I struggle with most from day to day is my lack of routine.  But deeper than that is the fact that I don't even know WHERE TO BEGIN.

I look at my home and I know what things NEED to be done, but they seem insurmountable.  There are piles of dishes and laundry and sewing projects and school work.  I cannot see the forest for the trees.  And since I have no idea where to start, I don't start at all and the mess multiplies.

You see I am not one of those people who is naturally organized.  I don't automatically KNOW what to do and what order to do it.  In addition to this, I was raised by a mother who tended to do everything herself.  She is naturally organized with list upon list to keep her on track throughout the day, so I'm not even sure had I asked her to help me that she would have been able to.  People who naturally do something tend to not be able to convey in simple enough terms HOW they do it to those of us un-naturals.

There are a few things that she taught me specifics on...hanging up laundry is the main one that comes to mind.  I know exactly where to place the clothespins to ensure the clothes don't bear that tell-tale mark of being hung to dry.  I know how to attach them to each other to conserve space on the line.  It is one area of my domesticity that I feel prepared for.

But beyond that, I am clueless.  I see homeschooled girls reaching marriageable age with more domestic skills and knowledge than I possess at nearly 30.  I simply do not know how to run a household.  I can say that--it's ok.  I don't have to pretend like I know what I'm doing, although I must b/c I have admitted this shortcoming of mine on more than one occasion and often get the response of, "Oh, but you always seem to have it all put together."  To this I must say, "Just because something looks a certain way doesn't mean it IS a certain way."  Anyone who has caught me "off-guard" in their visits can attest to this fact.

I have feared that I was just lazy and that was why my home runs in jerks and starts.  And as the babies continue to come, I cry out in fear to God--"WHAT do I do?  HOW do I get my life in gear?  I CAN'T live like this and raise 3, 4, 5... children."

As I did dishes for the 6th time last night and contemplated the fact that nearly EVERY dish in my kitchen was dirty, I began to feel as if I would never get this figured out.  I know there are people out there w/ many more children than I have who admittedly do not know what they are doing.  Some pretend as if they like it that way (I say pretend, b/c I DO NOT believe that anyone is truly happy living in chaos) and others live in despair.  Would I be one of those women who raised her family by accident?  Not purposefully b/c I cannot be purposeful on a whim (which is pretty much how I live my life--on a whim). Some people have told me they envy my "spontaneity."  I enjoy being able to drop things and go, but I would like to have a routine that allowed for me to feel guiltless about being spontaneous and one that would allow for me to slide right back into life once the fun was over, instead of leaving me standing there staring at the additional chaos my moment of spontaneity caused!

Today I believe an answer came.  Maybe not THE answer, but a starting point at least.  A place to BEGIN.

A MOMYS friend of mine, HeadingHomeward (Bibs on MOMYS) wrote this post:

http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/HeadingHomeward/248775/

I am anxious to see what can be gleaned from these discussions.  I am looking for someone to TEACH me HOW to do the natural domestic-type things that somehow got lost among my generation.  And in case, any of my fellow readers feel as ill-equiped as I do, please consider joining in on the group--you can click the link in the sidebar of her blog to join the Yahoo group.  And I am sure those of you who do know what you are doing would be welcome to in order to give us all some direction and guidance!

1) Decide one morning that you are tired of having two babies in diapers and today is the day that the toddler will potty train.

2)  Get the potty chair out of storage and put it in the middle of the living room floor and then pray no one comes for a visit.

3)  Make a big deal over the potty chair, make up a catchy tune about going potty in the potty chair, set child on potty chair, wait there until the house starts caving in on itself, quickly remove child (hopeful that they understood what you were wanting them to do), clean up all the disasters that happened while you were "potty-training."

4)  Set child on potty chair sporadically throughout the day when you have nothing better to do.

5)  Decide that this may take more than one day.

6)  Let the child run around in their brother's t-shirts w/ nothing underneath for days on end.  When t-shirt becomes soiled, remove immediately and hide so big brother doesn't gross out. 

7)  Clean up all the messes as soon as you find them (if your older children suddenly yell, "MAMA, my socks are wet!"  ask them to stand still to mark the spot until you can get there w/ a rag!  DO NOT let on to the reason WHY their socks are wet.

8)  Decide that the nudist approach to potty training isn't working. 

9)  Dig out all the cute undies from the previous potty-trainer (boy or girl b/c at this point you don't care) and make a big deal about how adorable these "unnies" are and how we don't want to mess them up by pottying in them.

10)  5 minutes later, change the cute unnies b/c they are no longer clean.

11)  5 minutes after that change those unnies b/c they are no longer clean.

12)  In desperation, switch back and forth between the nudist approach and the massive amounts of laundry approach for a couple of weeks.

13)  When the crawling baby begins to use the potty chair in the living room as a chew toy, put potty chair back in garage and introduce the "big boy/girl toilet."

14)  Take them to the toilet sporadically when you have nothing better to do.

15)  Continue to clean up messes and do laundry.

16)  Lament to your best friend that you are world's worst potty-trainer.  Admit defeat, decide you don't care if they aren't potty-trained until they are 17--isn't that why we homeschool after all--and pull the diapers out of hiding.

30 mins later your child will potty-train themselves!

I kid you not--this is how I did it--aren't I smart! LOL