What is it that comes between me and my pursuit of God... do I hold everything loosely in my hand, or is it wrapped tight in me heart?

Superbowl was a fabulous time of reflection for me. (not because of the superbowl... but because we went to my in-laws where I had the second living room all to myself with no distractions!)

There are 2 things Father God brought to mind.

First, finances and houses and feel good comforts etc. We have a renter that doesn't pay rent... or her electric and gas bill. We have to kick her out. but she has 2 little kids. We have given her lots of chances, and her jailhouse abusive father of her children who isn't supposed to be living there has tore up the place. yeah. joys of landlording. and I stress. I don't remember being a stresser for financial things, but apparently, that was only God's grace not my great spirituality. (feel free to laugh or puke... )

Second, this pregnancy... I want a full term healthy baby, with no complications in the pregnancy, and I want it guaranteed and when I feel more uterine activity than seems normal to me or should be ok, I freak out, because I want the above with NO bed rest and doing everything your average active mother does while being pregnant. I. dont'. want. to. slow. down.

HOWEVER, though I was assured by God this was a go ahead, and He would bless this. Both Bryan and I prayed and had a real peace about this pregnancy, that doesn't mean I get to call the shots. (ouch, just seeing it in print is rather... ugly) Father God, who created my body, who created baby inside my body, knows how it will go. And if I end up on bedrest, or need to take it easy, or the house goes to pots because I can't keep up on housework, or even if the baby is born early. GOD KNOWS!!! He is sovereign. That is a comfort not an omniscient threat!! SO I rest, and I stop drinking caffeine, and I stop bending over to pick things up and I don't run around to do errands because bending over getting the kids in and out of the car and picking up toys is NOT helping keep the uterus relaxed!!!

Its good. very good. NOW I am ready to move on and pursue God, having got those "little" things out of the way... I am sure I'll need to put them back on the altar a few more times - again pry my fingers off these grand gifts of God. BUT, for now, its good to move on in the Pursuit of God.