I guess it happens to us all...the time where we come to a stage of being tired and a feeling of being able to go no more. There are times of great vision and strength.....great motivation and vigor. Then there are those few (thank God there are few) times that we are caught down. I have always been one of openness and truth. I like saying that "I am what I am" and "here I am, like it or not". So, with good there's sometimes bad. Looking back, I remember having the same feelings of frustration and of being overly emotional. It's usually around this time of pregnancy indeed. But, with quite a few things on my plate this time, things got out of hand. Not so much outwardly but within. I had to take a deep breath, step back, cry out to God, and listen.

So over the weekend I while listening I thought of what the answer could be---what direction and angle to go in. With the home addition and all of the physical and mental work we took quite a few breaks from school. As I see your advice given as a gem, for us right now it's just not the answer---to break from school. No, it seems like in a way it's the beginning, but in a funny way as if it's been going on forever. I though of two things that had been abandoned during the frenzy of "doing it all". The first thing is a vision. Yes, my vision. Yes, the vision often spoken of and that's dear to my heart. If I lose that vision then I begin to panic and drown. But while holding on to the vision we have a smoother sail.

The other thing that had been abandoned was our beloved schedule. I have to say that there is no way that a family of our size and busyness (business?!) can do without a schedule. On Saturday I sat down once again. How many times have I done this in the past nine years? Twenty or more times? I wrote out a skeleton schedule of who needs to be where and when. Indeed it is a skeleton schedule and not very rigid. There' s simply a school time and chore time, with nothing specific written within. This gives us liberty with lack of frustration in knowing that we aren't "supposed" to be anywhere right then but schooling or choring. So as long as we're learning or working, we are not failing anything.

I really appreciate every one's encouragement. Especially James' as he's always one to be concerned about me. In his words I am "the best thing since sliced bread". Words as such means a lot! It was a simple statement but much needed. Your comments and concern mean a whole lot. Erica, you are a smart girl to be so young. Please remember your words as you become a mommy one day! Sherry, I cherish your encouragement. With your experience and vision, it helps to strengthen me. Mary Jane, you are a gem. We will have to enjoy our porches and coffee together.

With the home addition on top of everything else so much is changing.  A lot of it is for so much the good. Still, sometimes things get worse before it gets better. And this proves so much the usual case. I think now we are digging out of the worse stage and on to improvement from our starting point. It is true that we can't do everything. But hopefully, once it's over we will come out better than before! I am happy to say that this whole process of adding on is almost done and I AM GLAD. We will have just what we need to finish raising our family and I care to have no more house..... just babies to fill.  I hope that I can say that this is a once in a lifetime experience and we survived. Oh, Sis. April, of course we'll help y'all build yours. Helping is different than  doing. Ha!  As I was saying, I am ready for us to reap what we sowed.

Oh, speaking of reaping what we are sowing. I think we are finally going to plant tomorrow! It's a late start but, hey, you can't do everything you know?