Serenity Academy

My Problem

10:08 PM, Feb. 29, 2008 .. Posted in Musings .. 0 comments .. Link

So I've been feeling a tad on edge tonight. I wasn't really sure why. So I took a nice long shower... one of my favorite ways of relaxing, and I did some praying and meditating under the hot water. And it hit me. This past week I have not found much in the way of joy in my life. And it was weighing on me and my thoughts. I literally felt like I had no joy this week.

Then of course I made excuses. 'Oh, it's hard to be joyful when you have a tooth ache.' Or 'It's hard to be joyful when you hear sad news from a family friend.' or 'It's impossible to be joyful when your kids are sick and the one who isn't is giving you so much grief.' Well then I said to myself tough!

'YOU SHOULD FIND JOY IN LIFE DESPITE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES'

I of course didn't yell this at myself... more like thought it really loud. And the restlessness in me stopped. Talk about God trying to get your attention. Well he had mine. Once I got out of the shower and sat down and gave my week some thought. It was rough... of course it was. It was even down right tiring. But inside all those horrible things and sleepless nights there were other things.

Things like my Xander taking time out from his fun because he knew I was in pain and coming over to me saying, "Mommy I want to pray for you because you're not feeling good." Or Lucas still having the biggest smile despite being sick. Or Lucas telling me all about Spiderman when it was over. Or Aiden giving me hugs and kisses every too seconds and making a game out of it. Or my husband bringing me home a video game I want so I have something to do to help me take the pain away. Or listening to Xander tell me how many days are in some months because it means he really does listen to me when I teach him things. Or Lucas taking another step in the potty training adventure, (he went twice today without me reminding him to go). Or Aiden playing peek-a-boo while I'm making dinner. I have a wonderful life with four wonderful guys to share it with. I might have been dealing with a lot of stress and sadness and pain this week. But for each of those things I can come up with about 20 things to counter it. I can safely say I found my joy.

So I'm going to try every day to find a little joy and maybe share it here.
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