Pressing On - I'm still alive!!!

Aug. 21, 2007 - I'm still alive!!!

.... amazingly. I've been going through the worst cold I've had in a looooong time, and I still feel like I just need to chop off my head, drain it, and put it back on. Ahhhhh. But this morning, I took a nice, long, steaming hot shower. x) heaven, I tell you.

Buuuut, it's not lasting for long. This is my last week with the kids, so I'm trying to make it the best while not getting them sick. >.< And it didn't help when I had to clean up half a jar of strawberry jam in the refrigerator, and the brothers are beating each other up behind my back. Grr. The little Princess, though, has been a sweet dear. I love her dearly, as I love the boys, but the Princess means just a wee bit more... probably because she's a girly girl, and just so much fun to be around. I have mixed feelings about leaving tomorrow, because I know that it will be a while before I'll see them again... I feel like they're partly my siblings, and partly my own kids. But, it will be nice to wake up in my own bed every morning, without a little 7 y.o. staring at me, 2 inches away from my nose. xD

But now, now that it's almost over, I'm not looking at my summer, calculating how much dough I've made (but that fact does make me smile. xD) but rather, the difference living away from home and becoming a second mom to these kids, and learning about parenting and keeping a house in order has done to me. Sometimes, I wonder if it's been a bad thing, because occasionally, I feel like I'm parenting my REAL siblings. Like, telling my nearly-17 y.o. brother when he can play on the PlayStation, and telling Audrey what she needs to wear that day, and giving her instructions that she's supposed to just "carry out." Then I have to correct myself, and say, "Scratch that. Go ask mom." And walk away, red faced. =P But other things have happened that have improved myself. Such as, I am more willing to walk over, pick up the vacuume, and clean the whole house without blinking an eye. (My sister, 14, has even asked, "Who are you, and what have you done with my evil big sister?" and, "Emma, what is WRONG with you?!") And, I have learned to analize situations better. You really have no idea what parents go through until you have to be one. Learning how to be fair and just, but firm and kind, has been a milestone for me. I think it will be something I'll carry with me for a lifetime. :)

So when people ask me now, "wil you want to do it again?" I really don't have an answer. I think, spending so much time away from family was a little hard, and sometimes the wrong thing, but it was good for me to be in a different enviroment, and learning new things - not to mention, making a weekly income. *evil laugh* So we'll wait and see. We'll wait and see.

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Aug. 21, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Well, I for one will be glad to have you home again. I miss yooouuuu!

And if you want, I'll come up to your room every morning and stare at you, 2 inches from your nose.