I have been away for far too long.

My blog suffers each time I am under a deadline and this was no exception. Come to think of it, my body suffers any time I am under stress. Yesterday, I slept 15 hours because the piece I was working on was finally completed and submitted the day before. Ah the wonderful world of Fibromyalgia!

As it was, I woke up just in time for a date with my wife. Any time you can't remember your last date, it's a sign you need another one. Last night, we went out to the Outback Steakhouse, courtesy a friend's generosity, for what is the ideal meal to me. Start out with warm, fresh bread with butter. Follow with a caesar salad and then a center-cut sirloin seared to medium-rare perfection along with a loaded jacket potato. Such is my favorite meal. We talked, held hands over the table, and meaningfully discussed life together. Then dessert arrived.

Every restaurant dessert requires an excuse. Paying $5 for dressed up ice cream is hard to justify otherwise. In this case, my birthday was the excuse and I decided to go big. The Outback's "Chocolate Chocolate Tower" is every chocolate lover's dream. Imagine thin layers of chocolate cake separated by the richest chocolate frosting known to man. I can't say it was fudge because that suggests something unlike what it was. I remember a Bavarian chocolate torte and this was the closest approximation. Good grief, it was so good! As a part of my weight loss regimen, I do not gorge anymore, but this was worth breaking that rule. If you want chocolate cake for your birthday, baby, that's the one!

I waddled to the car after that. I couldn't complete the feat and finish it. That's another part of my weight loss plan. Food left on the plate is a good thing, not something to feel wasteful about. Compulsive cleaning of the plate is just that, compulsive. I will not be mastered by anything, as Paul said.

Am I on a diet? Not really. Diet implies that I'll go back to old habits after a while. I can't afford that. I need to lose a lot of weight over time and then keep it off. This is the new way I eat and I plan to keep it that way. I will not order dessert in the future... unless I have an excuse.

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