One of the things that has kept me sane in this "career transition" is the fact that through all of the different highs and lows, I've never stopped being a father to my children. I always have a child to tickle, to discipline, and to tell them how much I love them.

Knowing how important it is for me to connect with them, it's going to be hard separating from them for a few days in a few weeks. I will miss the rhythms of their lives, the discussions over macaroni and cheese and chicken fingers about who is doing what, and the "heydadguesswhat?" interruptions that snap me out of whatever I'm concentrating on.

Fathering is not just a job. Jobs are something you put aside after a time, hanging it up like a coat at the end of a day. Fathering is a calling and a lifestyle. It's being available to your kids and actively pursuing a relationship with them. You remember how it was when you were first dating your wife. Your thougths were consumed by her. You couldn't wait until you saw her again. You thought of new things to do with her. It's much the same with being a dad. When you see something cool, your thought is about how you'd like your kid to see it. You dream up cool things to do with your eldest daughter or youngest son. Even if he's a baby, a picture of you holding him in some cool location like under the St. Louis Arch or overlooking the Grand Canyon will be a tremendous reminder of how you were there for him or her and how much you loved being around them, even when all they could do was eat, sleep, poop, and cry.

Looking back at the photos, I wonder if my eldest daughter could have ever been that small. Each moment with them is a gift. Taking the time to savor those moments is so very important. It builds a history of memories that your children will fall back on when the rough times come and they feel like nobody cares.

My own father wasn't as involved with me as a boy, but when I began to take those first steps into adulthood, he came alongside me and walked me through some of the most difficult times growing up. He did this just by spending time with me. As a result, we have a very close friendship that distance doesn't seem to touch. It's never too late to start being a dad, and it's never too early, either.

Being a dad is a gift. Even when you're mopping up puke at 3 AM. Your kids won't remember those moments. Surprisingly, you might not either. But you will remember the times when you went out and did something and the times when you held them close during a movie. It is God's gift to you. Treat it well.

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