One of my peers once said that there is no creature on the planet that is more miserable, angry, or disconsolate than a Christian who has violated their conscience. I can't help but agree. All day long, I've been agitated, upset and inconsolable. Nothing has brought me the peace I normally have. Why? What did I do?

I borrowed a game.

That's right. Horror of horrors, I asked a friend if I could borrow a game, he agreed, and I took it home last night. The game is a spoof on adventure games and it's hilarious, but it's also full of raunch, double-meanings, and dark humor.

Only last week, I felt the Holy Spirit rebuke me for indulging the darker side of my humor, which is two steps removed from cynicism, anarchy and despair. It's the kind of humor that surfaces in the joke that goes, "When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like his passengers." Dark humor is like pepper or spice. A little bit adds flavor and dimension to life. Any more of it overpowers everything it touches.

The double-meanings and the raunchy stuff adds fuel to the fire. I try to ignore the stuff and just move on with the game, but that's like trying to ignore a big, flashing neon sign. I'm not fooling anyone but myself if I play the game and think it can't touch me. The worst part is trying to hide it from my son. If I'm keeping secrets like that from anyone in my family, something's wrong. Worse, young eyes see and hear more than we realize. Nope, that game's going back to it's owner and my son is getting an apology from me. I'm trusting he will learn not just from my successes, but also my failures.

Already, my peace is returning.

• Send to a Friend!