Apr. 6, 2007 - Ministry Life
Several people have asked me about life as a minister's wife or how my husband went into the ministry, so I thought I'd share! :)
Scott is from a long line of ministers. But he never wanted to be a minister! He saw how tough the life can be and was excited to do some other things. And because most of the ministers I had growing up ended up having affairs and getting divorced, I was NEVER going to marry a minister! Don't you just love God's sense of humor??
Scott's dad is a minister, his 3 brothers are in full-time ministry, uncles, etc. His grandfather started Bible colleges, was a church planter, minister, and missionary, and his story is incredible. They were missionaries in Asia during World War II. Eventually, the Japanese knew they were in hiding and dropped pamphlets from planes demanding their capture. The family turned themselves in and spent years in a Japanese prisoner of war camp. Scott's dad was actually born while they were in the camp. As the years went on and the Japanese began to lose the war, the treatment of the prisoners grew worse. I belive they were given one cup of rice a day per person. They obviously lost weight and grew weak. Their three young children did pretty well. Their liberation by the American forces finally came, and they returned to the States. There are many, many other fascinating stories of their time as missionaries; miracle rescues from the hands of bandits and murderers, etc. What a legacy they left us!
Fast forward to the '90s...Scott and I met at a Christian college and began dating. He served a summer with an organization called Christ In Youth. After that summer, he knew he was being called to the ministry. He saw the incredible impact youth ministers could have on teens. At our first church, Scott was the associate pastor and it gave him great experience in all aspects of ministry- from births to funerals and everything inbetween. He worked mostly with teens. Eventually, his passion for children led us to a children's ministry in Clearwater FL and then to Indiana. He recently transitioned to Family Ministry and is working some with small groups as well. He really is incredible with kids. Here we are at VBS the last two years. Kids love Mr. Scott! 
In general, ministry life is full of blessings. When we move to a new town, we already know what church we're going to and meet Christians right away! We are surrounded by incredible people who love the Lord. We get to see lives changed. The Lord continues to bless Scott's service. There certainly isn't a lot of money in ministry, but God ALWAYS provides what we need and far more.
And there are tough parts.The never-ending hours are tough. Knowing your kids are in that good ol' fishbowl is hard. Being initimately involved in heartbreaking situations is exhausting. Having 3,000 people think they know how you should do your job is tough. The criticism ministers receive is unbelievably hard. More on the wives than the guys, I'm guessing. I don't think people typically walk up to a woman whose husband is in marketing or construction or finance and tell them everything they think he is doing wrong or could improve on. I of course know Scott's heart and the hours and effort and energy and prayer he puts into things, and it hurts when people are critical. Of course, everyone's intentions are good- everyone wants THE BEST for their families. Sadly, in our experience HOMESCHOOLERS are the most critical!
Can I encourage you to let your pastors and their families know you appreciate them? Our last church was amazing at that. (This one not so much, but that is ok; they are fabulous in other ways.) I still have letters and cards we received 10 years ago, and I remember gift cards to restaurants or tickets to a show or offers of free babysitting. That kind of support and encouragement goes so far!
I believe one of satan's greatest goals is to ruin the lives of those who have accepted the call to full-time ministry. They are under attack daily. We've all seen it. So please pray for your ministers and church staff and their families. Pray for protection from satan's attacks, pray for their marriages, for energy to do the work, and for them to continue being equipped and built up to make a difference for God's kingdom. And if you want to bake them a pie, that is always good, too. 
Comments
Apr. 7, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by debbiecorley
Thanks for the reminder. I think I'll email some folks right now to thank them for the AWESOME Good Friday service they planned. A lot of work went into making it an extra special worship service. My husband, as you know, is a part time worship leader in our church, and you are absolutely right about people feeling the freedom to critique and offer unsolicited advice! It can be so hurtful!
Apr. 7, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by 2peter318
Though we are not in full time ministry, we worked very closely with the minister and his family at our last church. I have seen, up close, what you all go through, and my heart is sad so many times. I'm blessed to hear you being so blessed by it. I do try to remember to let our new pastor and his family know what a blessing they are, but I should probably do it more. Thanks for the reminder. :)
JoAnn
Apr. 7, 2007 - Thanks for sharing...
Posted by weesma
the view from your side. Funny thing is I grew up wanting and feeling it was my calling to be a minister's wife! But God had other plans and made me a banker's wife. And after being close friends with several in full-time ministry, I know I don't have the guts or the patience to be in the hot seat. In my experience, homeschooling ministers have it even rougher because of being different in one more way.
Thanks for reminding us to support and encourage our
leaders. It's so easy for me to be critical. But I sure don't like it when someone is critical of me!
Have a great Easter!
Joanna
Apr. 8, 2007 - Wow! You nailed it.
Posted by 2cupsOjava4me
I've seen pastors go through such terribly hard seasons at our church, and some have left for reasons other than God calling them elsewhere. I've seen them lose heart, and lose direction. Thanks for sharing your heart, and challenging those of us not in full-time ministry to build up those who are. May God continue to pour out His faithfulness over your lives and your children for your love and sacrifice for His "flock".
Blessings,
Lori
Edited by 2cupsOjava4me on Apr. 7, 2007 at 10:58 PM
Apr. 8, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by nsremom
oh how interesting! I loved the story about his grandparents. What a neat family to sit and listen to stories about.
You're right about people feeling like they can criticize those in ministry~~~outright. How funny. Yep, no wife ever came up to me when my hubby wasn't doing everything they thought he should. Crazy to even think it.
A good youth minister is so needed these days. Esp. if he's great with kids, like it sounds like. I went to a huge, huge, huge youth group as a teen and I can honestly say that it changed my life. Hands down, the leaders that I saw living godly lives changed my views on things. There were up to 500 kids sometimes during our outreach times during the school year. It was like a carnival for Jesus for months. It was one of the best times of my life, really.
When I got married we worked with a small church youth group and realized that maybe what I had wasn't always the case. (it was horribly borring and uninspiring) So, hoooooray for your church that they have your man. Just think that someday another 30 something year old will tell someone, "my youth group and youth minister changed my life" just like me! and it will have been because of your HARD work.
Apr. 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by mycrazylife
Hey Cindy Lou!
See what you started! I'll never call you anything else now. Thanks sweetie for the vote and once again for your lovely email!
I am so amazed over your post about your husbands family! What incredible stories you must have to tell your children! Are they at the age where they love to hear about it?
I personally can't imagine being a minsters wife. It must be very difficult, yet very rewarding I'm sure. The scrutiny must be hard to handle some days. I bet they just love you! I certainly can tell why they would.
Blessings,
Hallie
Apr. 9, 2007 - Thanks for sharing!
Posted by EEEEMommy
I'm glad to get to know you even better!
What a godly heritage you guys came from! I'd love to hear more about the grandparents! Is there a book about them? We LOVE missionary stories!
Apr. 9, 2007 - many thanks!
Posted by Kimmie
Thanks Cindy for sharing and reminding us to be encouragers. How better we would all do if a word of encouragement would meet us each day-or once a week or monthly. Life (ministry ~whatever it is) can be so hard!
May God give you wisdom and continue to fill your hearts with his Love that passes understanding and covers over a multitude of days of no appreciation ;-)
Love Scott's fashion style- you married quite the swash buckler/super hero I'd venture to say!
Always good to remind ourselves when satan is telling us no one appreciates us, or that our spirit's are feeling low - that better to have the amen of God over our lives than the praise of men. (I still think an encouraging word is great, but so often we don't get it and need to remind ourselves that we are doing it unto the Lord and not unto men.)
May God bring you friends to encourage you, may he continue to direct you and Scott so that when you stand before his throne that he will indeed say to you, "Well done my good and faithful servant!"
Thanks so much for sharing-I loved the pictures too!
Hugs;
Kimmie
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/growingalongtogether
Apr. 11, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by chickadee
your husband makes a great pirate! what fun pictures!
Apr. 17, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by PumpkinsMomma
Hi! So thanks for sharing more of your past and current life with us! You story of Scott's family was interesting...I didn't realize you were in ministry. I think it is very important, and I pray for my pastor everyday, I pray for our church services and our deacon meetings,etc...unfortunately I wonder sometimes if it's not working.
Maybe you could advise me - our pastor is becoming increasingly prideful, he's admitted this from the pulpit, but anytime he's questioned about decisions he lashes back. Hubby was recently installed on the deacon board and though things are discussed he says no one ever disagrees with the pastor. All dissenting opinions are squashed. Our church is getting more into debt as time goes by because the staff are getting raises and they aren't cuttin spending as much as they should. And my best friend and hubby - the youth pastor and wife were forced out of the church when differences came up. I am so saddened by what it going on. It is really hard for me to pray blessings on our church and pastor when I think what really needs to happen is for them to feel the pain of the bad decisions they are making. But I do still pray, and I often send handmade cards to them...and I always suprise them with a gift on their birthdays. I just don't know what to do :(
email me if you have any tips - pumpkinsmomma@gmail.com
thanks
marie
