Our Little Corner - Why is That? No, Really. I'm Asking.

Our Little Corner

Nov. 4, 2008

Why is That? No, Really. I'm Asking.

Have any of you other women found that the older you get, the worse you're able to cope with PMS? I'm really wondering and I'd love to hear your thoughts. I'm 37, so I know I haven't started menopause...right? Or perimenopause? My mom didn't start all that until she was in her fifties, I think, so there's no history of being early. But I feel stressed out and worn thin a lot of the time. What's going on with me? Is it PMS? It does seem to get worse around that time. Is it spiritual? Or is it simply that I AM stressed out and worn thin? I feel like lately I'm going through the motions in sort of a semi-detached way. Like if I don't stay in "Do not bother me. Do not stop me. Just let me get my work done." mode, everything will all fall apart, including me.

Yesterday was such a bad day. Right off the bat in the morning Zach started up. He's got a terrible attitude about going to the clinic right now and Mondays are awful because of it. He told me he wakes up and his first thought is, "Clinic day," and he spirals into the mood from hell. And who do you think gets the brunt of that? So I'm dealing with him, trying very hard to maintain my cool while I teach him about transitive and intransitive verbs, and the doorbell rings. It's Puget Sound Energy wanting their money. But here's the thing. They made a mistake. Our meter wasn't working quite right when we moved in here and, of course, not being meter readers we didn't know. Who could know that? Finally a year and a half later they figured it out and suddenly wanted all the money they failed to collect. Right now. Luckily we had it, but still, that's not a great day maker.

Then we went to the clinic and Zach had his session. Afterward, as always, I went in for a short conference with his teacher, just the two of us. Usually these talks take five minutes during which time we quickly discuss what they accomplished that day and how I can utilize it at home. This time I was in there for twenty minutes, mostly discussing Zach's struggle right now with attitude. I'm glad she has Kleenex on her desk, because I broke down and cried in there, which I've never done. I guess Zach told her that he no longer has a disability, and when she asked him why he thinks that he said, "Because I don't want to have anything wrong with me, so I don't. I decided." He's in denial and is having a bad time of it, and because of that it's a thousand times harder to teach him. I cried because sometimes it feels so hopeless...like I'm looking into a bottomless pit. I feel like we'll never make enough of a difference for him to be able to leave home someday and live successfully. The good thing is that his teacher understands and is able to offer support. She let me cry and said nice things. Then she decided that she, Zach, and I are going to have a meeting together next week to talk with him about his attitude and to kindly tell him some things he needs to hear, things that sometimes are more effective coming from someone who's not your mom. And maybe he'll open up, too, and share where he's at. It could be a really good thing.

And finally yesterday, to top it all off, I broke a wisdom tooth. It already had a filling, so I guess the thing to do now is have it removed. Ugh. Just what I needed.

So. What's going on with me? Stress? Sometimes I feel like I should be able to deal with things like this without it affecting me. I wonder if I'm just more highly strung than other people. I even started taking B Complex vitamins because I read on someone's blog (Thank you, Camille!) that it helps with mood. So far all I've noticed is that it's turned my pee neon yellow.

Anyway. Do you ever feel like this? It would help me to know.

Sue

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Comments

Nov. 4, 2008 - Vitamin B

Posted by Anonymous

Drew loves the neon yellow!!! LOL He always wants me to buy those tablets that turn the water in your toilet blue... You can just guess why. lol

If you don't feel much effect starting at the lowest dose you can add a little more at a time. Drew needs lots more than I do.

And - YES - dealing with PMS has gotten harder the older I get. I'm almost 33. I hate it!!

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Nov. 4, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by SueinMI

Thanks, Camille. That's funny about the neon yellow mixed with blue water. Hey, a homeschooling art lesson! LOL I'll look into upping the dosage after another week or so. I just started taking it a few days ago, so maybe it's too early to tell.

As long as I'm talking to you, I want to tell you that I thought the Twilight video you posted on your blog was hilarious.

Sue

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Nov. 4, 2008 - Yes

Posted by KellieinNC

Oh Sue...I feel your pain. From what I read I can say yes to part of this is probably PMS. I know that during that time of the month I turn into a whole different person. In fact it scares me spitless of the horrible thoughts that go through my head and my total lack of tolerance towards my children. I usually want to throw the towel in, run away, or at least lock myself in my room and cry. Secondly, I know that the stresses of life can really seem 10 times bigger during this time. I feel like I am so incapable of teaching my children especially when it comes to their learning disabilities. But listen to me when I say that you are doing awesome with your children. You are so fortunate to have help for Zach. All three of your children are bright, intelligent, and going to make a positive impact on this world. Hang in there and know that there is a support group across the states crying with you, praying with you, and loving you.

Edited by KellieinNC on Nov. 4, 2008 at 4:59 PM

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Nov. 4, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Jenny

Sue,

It could be perimenopause. In Western culture, it's not unheard of at our age. It usually starts at 40. Here are some other symptoms I found at www.menopausetohealth.com.

"It's not just erratic periods that can give a woman a clue she may be experiencing pre menopause symptoms. Other peri menopause symptoms include headaches, insomnia, aches in the body, tiredness, irritability, hot flushes, mood swings, a decreased sex drive, weight gain particularly around the abdomen and hips, breast tenderness, and water retention."

I guess I would see an Ob-Gyn if you're not feeling like yourself again soon.

Sorry girl. I remember in my last month of being pregnant with Samuel, I cried every day. And I usually made the kids cry too. It was an awful hormonal roller coaster ride. Yes, I was screaming, but not because I was having fun. NOBODY was having fun. Then, magically, after Sam was born, I was fine--even though I was busier!

Hmmm...this line of thought makes me wonder... have you and Mike taken "permanent measures"?

Love you,
Jenny

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Nov. 6, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Camille

Oh no! LOLOLOL

Give all the kids vitamin B & buy some toilet tablets!

That's lots more fun than the finger paints I used for our last color lesson. Hehehe

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Nov. 6, 2008 - I can sooooo relate!!

Posted by Candace

Hey Sue, just today I was wondering what was going on with me! I have talked with my older friends and sister and they all have described their cycles changing and mood swings increasing. My sister (46) just had a hysterectomy which of course made me wonder if that is where I will be in 8 years. However, after looking at your Halloween blog postings you have only added to my depression. You are a wonderful mom and seem to have it all together where I am failing miserably. I have so much respect for you; you are doing an awesome job!! Zach is a GREAT kid and he fits in soooo well at youth group. I will be praying for you and Zach this week. Thank you for your insight and humor throughout the week; I LOVE your blog!

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Nov. 8, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by SueinMI

Thanks, everyone. I really do appreciate everything you've all said.

Candace, you are so far from "failing miserably" that I wonder if we're talking about the same family! You have the most amazing children...talented, smart, hearts for God, polite. I mean really. I'm being totally serious. You and Kevin have done a wonderful job. And your marriage is strong and secure. You have a husband who loves you and loves God.

You know, lots of moms have to work. When we lived in MI I worked, sometimes A LOT. I'd homeschool, clean the house (sort of), and then Mike and I would pass each other coming and going. He'd come home and I'd leave for the evening. It's a season of life, girl. Your family will survive it and be totally fine. My own mom worked all through my childhood and, actually, she only just retired this year. It was fine.

I wish you could see you from my point of view. But then who am I to talk? LOL Maybe that's the plight of being a mother. We go through life worrying and don't learn to relax...ever?

Sue

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About Me

I'm Sue and I'm happily married to my best friend in the world, Mike. We have three children: Zach (13), Drew (10), and Baylee (7). This blog will be about our homeschooling experiences and just life in general.