Suga Mama on life with Chocolate Droplets
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Jun. 28, 2006
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I was feeling mighty down, I was feeling mighty low, but...
Warning:
This is an excerpt from my journal. If you really don't want to know
who I am or what I struggle with stop reading now. If TMI (too much
information) doesn't bother you, then enter in...
Dear You,
Its not about him not being the spiritual leader of our home. Its not
about wether he prays before a major (or minor) decision. Its about me.
Forget about how he will respond when I say we should do a "family fun
night" (devotional). Its about me.
I have not been steadfast in prayer and diligent in reading God's Word.
Although I do feel like he has influenced my spiritual life for the
worse (not encouraging prayer together, nor discussing spiritual
things). I can not place all of the blame on him. Its about me.
A CBS style Bible
study would serve me right now. Something that would guide me into
God's word and give me understanding. My heart desires to be close to
you Lord, to discuss my dreams and fears with you and then, (the best
part) to hear CLEARLY from You. That's what I want. That's what Your
word says I have, but I don't "feel" it.
I know its not about a feeling. The Truth says nothing can seperate me from your love, not even my feelings...
God, I want to know how You see me. What do You think about the choices
we are making? The move, the business, more/no more children? What do
You think about my heart concerning my relationship with *this
particular friendship gone sour*? How could I improve with my children?
Is there something in the neighborhood you would want to do through me?
I need to hear from You!!
To quote Ms. Sophia (some of yall know who she is) "I was feeling mighty down, I was feeling mighty low, but...I knowed 'dere was a God!"
I came down to the school room and thought to read a devotional. This is what today's message was : June 28
I sat here nursing the baby and cried as my soul was replenished! God,
does listen even when I don't think he is. Its not how often I read my
Bible, how long my prayers are or (to my dh's credit) how spiritual I
am. Its Christ. I don't remember the words to all of this song, but one
line that keeps coming back to me is...
"It is enough that Jesus died and that He died for me!"
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About Me
A window into my daily ramblings of growing Godly Men and Women while loving my husband, being a keeper of my home and staying sane all at the same time!! |
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