I totally forgot that the 5MinutesForMom Blog Party started today. I was supposed to dress up my blog, bring in a DJ, and serve killer snacks, but here I am, feeling like the neighbor who gets unexpected trick-or-treaters and ends up handing out tea bags, Flintstones vitamins, and rubber bands. I'm sure all you other participants are Martha Stewart clones, and I'm the Beverly Hillbilly of the blogosphere.
But not to worry! There are a couple of things I always have on hand (besides tweezers and a magnifying mirror, two very important tools for women of a Certain Age): coffee and chocolate.
So here you go. Here's a paper napkin, just pretend you didn't see that Arby's logo on the corner. Help yourself. Oh, those indentations on the bottoms? Yeah, um.... they came that way. It's definitely not because I was trying to find the caramels.
Okay, yeah, now just shove that laundry to one end of the sofa while I tell you a little bit about myself.
I've been married for over 20 years to Mr. Right - Mr. Always Right.
I have so many hot flashes, I think I'm personally responsible for global warming.
I've got four beautiful, talented, amazingly funny kids, ages 16, 15, 13, and 11. And all four of them still need me at the very second I close the bathroom door.
I believe WalMart is the gateway to Hell.
I'm 5'10" and yet I wear four-inch heels, not caring that I look like Queen of the Amazon Women.
I think cooking is highly overrated.
I email Starbucks headquarters every week, asking them to open a franchise on my back porch. (No luck so far.)
Don't hate me, but I didn't get any stretch marks during my pregnancies, even when I was carrying an 11-pound baby.
I think Apolo Anton Ohno should marry one of my daughters.
I concur with whoever said, "I've reached an age where every time I sneeze, my bladder thinks it has to be involved."
Well, I hope you enjoyed your visit. Oh, here, let me use the lint roller to get at least a couple pounds of that dog hair off your pants. Okay, you're good to go.
I'll send you off with a little poem that my dear mother used to display:
Welcome to our home!
Come in, sit down, converse.
It doesn't always look like this.
Some days it's even worse.
Flintstone vitamins, teabags and rubberbands. LOL! I enjoyed stopping by to mingle. And that rubberband will come in handy
Blessings,
Toni
http://www.inthemidstofthisseason.blogspot.com/
LOL! I love your global warming comment. I haven't gotten there yet but I will be married 20 years next month. I think our husbands are related. They have the same name. (Mr. Always RIght!) Stop by when you can!
I am so in agreement on the Walmart comment.
I hate that place and my husbands greatest fear is he ends up a greeter there handing out smiley stickers. ARGHHHHH
You just crack me up. Who needs that Rosie when they could have your view of life. Let's get this party started!
Chocosphere? Where have I been?
2:45 AM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Mary
Chocosphere, oh chocosphere, where have you been all my life. Hey, sign me up for that year membership thing. THEN remind me that I promised to lose weight this year! That way I'd at least share.
8:52 AM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by www.seventhdiamond.blogspot.com
You are busting me up! I think we are twins.. Fantastic list.
Drop by my place if you find time..
-Kimberley
Blog party begins!
9:16 AM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
What a great party! I'll forget about the laundry on your couch if you promise not to notice ANYTHING at mine! LOL I have 7 kids, and your mom's poem is my motto! I have too much to do to clean. I'm happy if we can walk and have one couch to sit on, even if laundry falls on our head.
I'm at qtpies7.blogspot.com
Urrgh, now I want chocolate. And I can't have any for at least a week. *Sigh* 'Cept chocolate smoothies....
Coming by to party...
3:14 PM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Thanks for inviting me in...chocolate and coffee make a great party. When you get a minute check out my own box of chocolates @ www.tuttlefamilyadventures. blogspot.com
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4:11 PM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Coming through with the Ultimate Blog Party, thanks for sharing your site with us! Love the layout!
Hope you are having a great time!
Michelle Potter
http://usr-bin-mom.com
Aloha!
4:11 PM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Liza's Eyeview
Visiting through the U Blog Party and ultimately enjoyed your posts!
I'm dreadfully late; so sorry. You KNOW how traffic can be around here. You don't happen to have any dark chocolates with coconut left over, do you? Or maybe something raspberry?
Lovin' it!
9:03 PM, Mar. 3, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
The mirror and tweezers...totally can relate!! LOL...and the little verse at the end is cute, and true about my abode as well...thanks for the party invite...off to visit more...
I kept thinking the blog party sounded cool, like something I'd want to do, but figured I shouldn't because of my illness. Hope the party is fun! I've actually felt a little better today...I hope this is good and not me in denial. Tomorrow I don't get to go to church so I'm going to listen to some of my PCA podcasts that I subscribe too.
Catch ya on monday.
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12:05 AM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Martha www.journeyofasahm.blogspot.com
ok I'm loving your snacks!!!lol
A homeschool mom, you rock!! I admire the moms that homeschool there kids it's awesome!!
Thanks for coming to my party and you should of seen the smile on my son's face when I read to him your comment about his "excellent form shooting the basketball".
I had such a lovely time! You were a fine hostess and the chocolates were wonderful!
~Connie
A PARTY YEAH.
12:50 AM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by zztop357_
A week long party,So nice to invite us.I brought home made biscuits and homemade Damson jelly.Be careful of the biscuits they are straight from the oven.
OOOH Chocolate Yum..I like chocolate too;D.
I don't have hot flashes.I have power surges..I have 2 grown kids,no stretches either.I think we're lucky.
I think I'll mingle a while,then I really should visits others too.
You have a lovely home here...reminds me of mine...Did you see where our dog went? I know she's here somewhere...So nice of you to have us.Be sure you come and visit now,you hear?
Donna
Oh you are a hoot! I can so relate! I have been married 20 years in January and my dh is also Mr. Always Right! Richard -Always Right. I am in the middle of Hot Flash Heaven as well and what a joy getting older is! Although it certainly beats the alternative!
Come on over to my blog and join the Defending the Faith party I have each SONday!
JoJo
:) tiggerprr here
8:28 AM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Thanks for stopping by my place, and lol your party sounds like my reality. :)
Great Party
10:55 AM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Just stopping by your party via the Ultimate Blog Party. I loved the chocolates ;) Do you think that 4 kids is easier or the same as having 3? I have three now with one on the way!
Tonya @ http://mamaslife.blogspot.com
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12:36 PM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Jennifer from sobahmysoul.blogspot.com
lol. You're a funny lady! Thanks for the chocolate.
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1:21 PM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Definitely got my daily, no, weekly dose of laughter while visiting you today.
lindafay
higherupandfurtherin.blogspot.com
The party's great at your house!
3:18 PM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Thank you for stopping by my site; I'm SO glad I dropped by yours! I laughed and laughed. This blog party is the best idea ever; how else could you meet such terrific women?
luisa at novembrance dot org
novembrance dot blogspot dot com
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8:01 PM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
I felt very welcome. I loved the quote your mother displayed. It speaks of my home. Come visit some time. By the way, why is wal-mart the gateway to hell?
Thanks for stopping by
8:53 PM, Mar. 4, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
You are too funny! I'm glad you stopped by The Porch Light (http://ourfamilyporch.blogspot.com) for the party. I'll be back here, I'm sure. Have fun!
Revka
LOL!
7:53 AM, Mar. 5, 2007
.. Posted by busybusymomma
You have a great sense of humor! ;)
-Michelle
http://busybusymomma.blogspot.com
LOVE IT!
10:43 AM, Mar. 5, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
It's nice to meet a fellow hillbilly blogger (wait is that how you put it)...I forgot my party preparations too! shame shame...Anyway, I really enjoyed visiting your blog!! I look foward to coming to visit again soon! May you be blessed! Come check out our family blog here if you have the time: www.dead2sin.com/our_blog
Stephanie
Hat Yai, Thailand
www.dead2sin.com/our_blog
I thought by now you would be out of Napkins so I left a roll of paper towels by the empty box of Chocolates!
Because of Jesus, Bobbie
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11:53 AM, Mar. 5, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Here from the blog party! Loved your post! Feel free to stop by my blog some time... http://confirmtheworkofourhands.blogspot.com
Party goer
3:01 PM, Mar. 5, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
thank you for the laugh today....I sure needed it....I personally can relate to the dog hair on people cloths as they leave as well as the bladder being involved when you have to sneeze....although I don't annouce that to much but it sure made me laugh....you had an 11 pound baby? Please tell me you had a ceasearian.......that would have hurt......
Thanks for the chocolate.....I really needed it today....
Blessings
Crystal
www.candlebabe299.blogspot.com
Oooh...yummy chocolate! We have a sign here on the wall near the playroom/schoolroom that says, "Visitors: It's not always this messy here... Sometimes it's WORSE!"
Take care and God bless!
great party post
2:04 PM, Mar. 6, 2007
.. Posted by Anastacia
Great party post! I enjoyed reading it. I've been having fun going around & saying hi to everyone. Thanks for stopping by my blog!
Nice to meet you!
Funny
6:21 PM, Mar. 6, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
So nice to meet you! I love the teabags, Flinstones vitamins and the rubber bands! We had friends last year that had a huge debate about the Halloween treat... he wanted to give the regular candy assortment... she, on the other hand wanted to give out raisins. Her hubby was horrified! He refused to be known as "the raisin house" to all the neighbor kids! :)
Way too Funny!
9:14 PM, Mar. 6, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
What a great party post! I completely agree with you that Walmart is the gateway to hell! lol!! And the bladder comment...way too funny! I've certainly enjoyed my visit!!
I about busted a gut laughing at your commentary on the expensive cheese. I sit here in Barnes and Nobles trying not to look weird laughing aloud at the screen on my MacBook.
I'll be back!
Enjoy the party
Welcome
12:22 PM, Mar. 7, 2007
.. Posted by Anonymous
Well, so nice to meet you! Welcome to the party!
Loved the quote...about sneezing and the bladder...I call that multi-tasking!
Diane
www.prayingforaprodigal.blogspot.com
Thanks for stopping by
7:21 PM, Mar. 7, 2007
.. Posted by Kathi
for the pizza roll-ups (pizza is the mainstay of every home in America with teens - isn't it?) Great blog!
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8:39 PM, Mar. 8, 2007
.. Posted by Jen
Hi nice to meet you
visit me at http://jenz.wordpress.com/
Hello!
12:27 AM, Mar. 10, 2007
.. Posted by Brandie
It's so nice to stop by and meet you =) You have a great sense of humor! Hope you have enjoyed the party nad thanks for the yummy chocolate!
