Last time I sat here gifting myself the time to write I was at the beginning of a new school year.  Here it is the close of the 1st semester & the Holidays are the center of our attention.  It has all been good.  The boys have perservered - excelling extremely well in some subjects, struggling in others.  All & all they stepped up to the challenges.  I am proud of them.

My oldest son (16) has finished drivers ed but has stopped short of getting his license.  In light of the fact that he now has a job as well we are hoping this next week will see that finally accomplished.  He is a good driver.  I think for him it is another step towards independence that he is alittle afraid to take on but he is ready nonetheless.  He has had struggles in life that have caused him to be wiser in the long run.  So between taking on a full 11th grade class load, working 20-35 hours a week & still finding the time to have a friend over to play video games - being here at this point in life with him is a gift I can only treasure & savor.  He's helping me let go.  I have had to hold on so tight to him when he was younger that I can only give all my thanks to the Good Lord for giving me the grace to hang in there when life was so very messy.

My youngest son (soon to be 15 in 2 weeks) has begun to flex his manhood.  Always a caretaking kind of guy - he has begun to find his own way apart from the family.  Needless to say he has knocked heads with his dad more times recently than ever before.  Fortunatley my hubby comes from a background of 2 boys.  He gets it - I don't but I trust my hubby.  His older sister sees it as very normal since she too put us through some grief only she went through it later so this too I am told is good.  He is a wonderful young man & a good student.   We went to Texas for Christmas this year & he is staying an extra week with his grandparents.  I miss him!!!

This is our 1st week off since we started our school year.  I thank God for the co-op we are in.  They keep us very focused.  Now we will be off for a month.  WHEW!! 

Today is the 1st day that I have had to just sit & even reflect alittle.  This has not been of my own choice however.  Today we had to put our dog Buddy to sleep.  He is 9 years old.  I took him to the vet this morning to have a tooth extracted.  He had a growing mass in his cheek that we thought was a result of a broken tooth.  He was just to the vet in October & was given a clean bill of health.  Well it has turned out that he actually had a very aggressive form of cancer.  There was no choice really.  His quality of ife would never be good.  Heis now gone.  I am still in shock.  I guess that is why it has taken me 3 paragraphs to get to sharing this.  Even though his is "just" a dog.  Like my boys - there is a treasure trove of memories that flash through my mind.  Like when I realized shortly after we got him as a puppy - he thought he was one of the boys so when I scolded him if I talked to him like I did the the boys he understood he was in trouble or when you were talking about him - if I was say complaining as I was known to do sometimes he'd turn his back on you.  If I was complementing him he was all wags.

Well hubby is taking me out for dinner.   My moment of reflection is now over.

Looking forward to a fabulous 2007!!!!

That's what we here at our house have been doing our best to get a handle on.  School this year began with what felt like a sudden jolt.  I had decided on their courses way back in June & feeling ahead of my usual routine - promptly forged ahead into summer.  By August I did a bit of a scramble to get all my books in time for a 1st week of September school start & BAM it was September 5th. We were officially back into school mode. 

This year both my boys are considered high schoolers.  We decided to stay with a co-op that worked well for us last year.  It is more of a traditional setting - each class is 1 1/2 hours 1x a week.  The boys then have daily assignments that I help them with.  Here is their schedule:

ds1 - Geometry, Biology, Culinary Arts, Writing 2, World Literature/History.

He also works as an apprentice for a banquet chef & is on a bowling league.  This is considered his Jr. yr. & he is due to get his drivers license this November (yeah!!)

ds2 - American History, Biology, Photography, Spanish 3,  Algebra 1, Debate, Writing 1.  He is also taking a PE course this semester at our gym, will continue with his guitar lessons & is on a bowling league.  This is his Freshman yr & he can not wait (& I emphasize "can not wait") to begin drivers ed in the spring. 

I in the meantime have been doing my best to stay committed to getting myself back into shape. When it's 100 lbs you're trying to lose & do it right it is a longterm venture.  So I must keep plugging away.  I am also co-founder of a non-profit that helps families here in the Twin Cities/MN who have a child diagnosed with Aspergers.  We have begun our parent support meetings (1x a month) & have a summer camp program that we will implement this next summer.  My hubby & I have our own business as well.  So all that being said  -

Time Management is crucial to getting it all done in a day.  We are all still getting adjusted.  September is like that here.  As much as I have felt as though we had to cut summer short - I honestly look forward to the routine of the school year.  October is already going to be off to a much smoother start as the 1st weekend has been set aside for some family down time.  I am far from a type A person & as long as I can have a day here & there for no schedule - I can muster the energy needed for the rest of the month.  In fact my hubby mentioned planning something that weekend last night needless to say he got the "look". 

According to my planner it's time to pick-up ds1, get to the gym, then pick up ds2, then drop ds2 off at the gym....

Today I am cleaning my house  - except for at this moment when I just need to take a break.  I love a clean house. I  was raised with a mom who set the standard high.  She is an amazing start to finish type of woman.  When it was house cleaning day - always Saturday mornings - we had our assigned duties which were carried out or else.  She did make it fun by turning on an 8 track (if you don't know what that is don't worry I don't forsee them making a comeback) of a musical like "Man of La Mancha" or "West Side Story" or "Godspell".  These Saturday mornings would eventually give me the songs I would use later as I pursued a major in Musical Theater however.... I have a very definite (or defiante I guess would work here too)dislike for spending my Saturdays cleaning.  So with that I have tried to do it differently by arranging to clean during the week.  Thereby leaving my weekends open for adventure.  I am an idealist to say the least.  For as the years would prove to me that Saturday usually becomes the best day to clean my house.  I still resist this as becoming my routine BUT alas here I am once again taking my Saturday to clean my house.  Only the music has changed from "The Sound of Music" to anything by Audio Adrenalin or Super Chick or Jeremy Camp & in CD format of course.

Well if I am going to get this house clean or else  - I better get back to work.

I would love to know what ideas you have for when is the best day of the week to clean?

What's your favorite car?

I have mentioned before that my hubby & I have a thing for cars, especially collector ones. Our love of cars is not lost on either of our boys.  Ds1 is a Mustang diehard like his mom.  Ds2 loves all things Corvette & can not wait to begin his own collection. 

My hubby bought me a 2005 Mustang GT Convertable least year.  She is my baby.  I cried when he handed me the keys.  I only have 4000 miles on her & try not to drive her in the rain. She is deep red w/black interior.  I used to drive a 68 Mustang white/red interior when my hubby & I dated. I sold her for $1000.00 back in 1988.  She needed alot of work but how I wish I could have held onto her.  Had to make other decisions at the time.  So I've pined over that one & the 82 Turbo GT black with the racing package that I totalled being very stupid which is what I had before I got the 68.  My parents had a 64 1/2 when I was a kid & I've always loved it.  I would love to someday get a 641/2 Mustang Convertable & several others.  The Saleen & Shelby's are also on my list. 

My hubby on the other hand is a Camero nut!!!  His mom had one that he raced around & wrecked.  Then he had one himself that he had to get rid of before I came along.  He has a picture of one on the refrigerator so I knew that in time I would see him in one.  He just bought a 68 Camero SS.  She is body off restored.  Clean as a whistle & with her brand new 350 engine has a sweet rumble sound.  She has a  pristine Tuxedo Black paint job you can see your reflection in.  He has his eye on the new Camero that is about to be available in 2008.

It's definitely a case of "Unchecked Car Enthusiasm". 

We have about 60 more days of driving here in MN & then it's time to put them in storage for the winter. 

Have you seen the movie "Cars"?  It really is a fun one for the whole family.  It's my speed anyway.

I'd love to hear your stories~

The Autism Conference was very awesome. 

There is a new paradigm (sp?) taking place regarding the whole "Is it genetic? or enviromental?".  This has placed many people on what would appear to be opposing sides of the same issue.  Now however the research is supporting a conclusion that brings us all together.  The research is strongly making the connection between an already weakened immune system that would be possibly genetic that is compromised by enviromental factors such as the toxins we are now exposed to daily. (yes -  that's a mouthful)  This was well received by those in attendance.

The other thing that was most celebrated is the "Combating Autism" Bill that is finally making some major headway towards gettting passed into legislation.  Conversations by the powers that be was taking place as we were meeting so we were able to get several updates.  This also has the ability to unite many sides of this concerning issue.  Look for this to begin to bring some long overdue attention to Autism.  (Did I ever mention that it effects more children today than childhood luekemia, diabetes & cycstic fibrosis combined?)

I actually didn't get to see much of Rhode Island as most of my time was at the conference but I did get to see Jim Belushi.  He was in town filming "Underdog" & was staying in the same hotel as me.  So of course we had to go watch the filming.  Turned out to be a slow day.  We also did get to enjoy something that Providence is known for & that is "FireWater".   What is "FireWater" you may ask?  It turned out to be a very cool night time event where there are all these bonfires in the middle of the river set to music.  It was relaxing & a great way to spend our last night.

The trip was great!! 

Now I am on the road again - I am writing from Phoenix, AZ where it is hot (113) but it is a dry heat.  We love it here!!  I will be here till next Monday mixing alittle business & pleasure with my hubby.  My daughter & my mom are here with me too.

Speaking of - they are at the pool - gotta run - they are saving a chaise lounge for me.

Adios ~

My kids think I am very "with it", my hubby likes to tell people that I am a "blogger" & my mom is like "what is that?". 

I get on here, start reading what others are sharing & before I know it several hours have gone by.  I haven't even posted anything myself.  I've noticed some post daily & some post monthly or have not posted in awhile maybe moving on all together. 

I never fail to glean something from anyone's post I've read & am enjoying the few friends I have made here so far.  I have even ventured to hit the "Random Blog" button.  What treasures one can find.

So as I sit here at my desk pondering the next thing I'd like to write about I see it is already time for me to go.  I have been going to the gym.  This is not my favorite way to spend my afternoon but I am slowly coming along.  Today I am going to learn what excercises I can do while I travel.  Tomorrow I leave for Rhode Island to attend the National Autism Conference.  I am going with 2 other friends & I know it will be very informative.  The last one I went to was in Seattle & that's when ANSWER the non-profit I am co-founder of was born.  So it will be a good trip but now that I am finally taking some time for me to get fit I am needing to learn what to do when not able to go the gym. 

Times up - It flys when I am here!!

Be back next week. 

My family has now gone back to their homes. 

All went very well - except for the stitches my 3 yr old nephew got on his chin when he fell down the stairs the 1st night they were here.  He actually didn't seem too phased by it.  He played just as hard as before the accident.  Something tells me these will not be his last. 

It was so wonderful to have such little ones around especially all family.  Chorus' of "dad", "mom","aunt", "uncle", "grandma" & "cousin" were sung all day & into the night.  The age range of our little get together (22 total) was 18mos. to 70 yrs old.

My hubby & I just got back from a late night dinner.  We were able to reflect on all the activities over this past week.  We feel so blessed to have been able to host everyone.

One of my favorite moments (& there are quite a few!!) was when one night several of us were out on the chaise lounges by the pool.  The kids had all gone to bed (the younger ones anyway).  My mom had spotted the 1st star of the night.  My hubby had lit some tiki torches.  It was peaceful & perfect.  As we were talking & marveling about the day I said "Wouldn't it be so very cool to have fireworks going off right over head?"  We all agreed that that would just be the very best way to end the day.  Sure enough as if on cue fireworks began to explode in the sky just over head.  We ooohed & aaahed for well over 20 minutes.  We have never had this kind of display by our house before.  (It turned out that someone a block over from us was having a party & apparently had a permit for a large fireworks display)  We thanked God for the show as we felt He orchestrated the moment just for us.

The 4th of July day was another I will not soon forget. That evening we all piled into a caravan of cars & headed to a lake nearby.  We were able to get our favorite spot (which gets harder to do each year).  The older kids played botchie (sp?) ball as the adults spoiled the younger ones with hugs & tickles & walks to the playground.  The fireworks were wonderfully entertaining made more so by the looks of awe in the little ones faces.

Now that they are all gone it feels so quiet.  I have something left behind from each one of them that I will be sending back to them.  As I pack up their stuff to send I am hoping that when they receive it they will hold fast to a fond memory of their trip here.

Then of course there are the pictures to share & remember till the next time we can get together.

Well the family visitors will be soon be here.  My brother, his girlfriend, my sister, her hubby & 2 kids will be here on Thursday & then my hubby's brother & his 2 kids will be here on Saturday.  All are staying through the 4th of July.  We are so excited!!

With that all the things around the house that we've been putting off are glaring at us for attention.  As well as projects that we already had scheduled that need to be completed. 

For example when we bought this house one of our favorites features is that we have a built in pool.  It has provided our family & friends many good times till about 2 yrs ago when we just decided not to open it.  The weather that year here in Minnesota was not really turning into summer.  It was not usual & it seemed to rain a whole LOT!!  Then last year it was evident we needed to replace the liner. The pool is actually 30 years old & pretty cumberson to maintain.  So we met with contractors & got bids to have it redone.  We ended up putting the project on hold till this year.  Oh how I have missed the pool.  OK so now here we are as of a few weeks ago we had bulldozers & cement trucks all over our yard.  YEAH!! Our pool is open for the season but we still have all the landscaping to do.  So outside it's been a mess!! 

My mom who was living with us & our daughter moved out. So now we are rearranging rooms.  Cleaning out space we forgot  we had.  (Not really - I was just trying to - I am the family pack rat) My mom is great at this so her & our daughter went on a clean out crusade all in the name of a yard sale.  So we recently had the yard sale of the summer. 

Have I mentioned my house is 80 years old?  Well with that every year we contemplate tearing it down or fixing it up.  Each year we decide to just fix it up & this year is no different.

There you have it.  My summer so far.  I did manage to get in the pool 2 times now & both times it rained but oh it was nice.  My hubby & I went out last night & quick had to run home for a minute.  We found all 3 of our kids & friends swimming.  It's worth the mess!!

Hubby informs me my break is over & if I want to go to the Classic Car Show I better get a move on.  He can be a taskmaster but he also knows how to get me motivated.  I hear there are 11,000 classic cars at the show this year.

Have a super summer weekend!! God Bless!!

I was completely caught off my guard as I began to write about my son.  In writing my 1st post about Aspergers I realized I had been holding my breath.  Even now to acknowledge this is as if a dam is ready to burst. I don't want that to happen, I don't know that I am ready - I can manage a trickle - not the dam.  So I stopped writing the other night. My emotions on this journey have run the gamut.  I have held most of them in check in.       

But God is showing me that there is a reason for the dam.  There is a legitmate time to pool up the water of my emotions - to protect those who are in the spillway. Like when I have been emotionally exhausted & frustrated with my lack of understanding about Aspergers or the people that were supposed to be helping me.  God is my Source.

The dam guards against an overflow that would only cause destruction.  Sometimes I am overwhelmed by all that having a child with Aspergers entails.  It  is hard to continue to hold on to the hope that tomorrow may bring a new lesson actually learned & a step closer to my son gaining some independence. God is my Comforter.

But a dam also can re-route the water which is very important to get water to places that otherwise would not have it.  I have had to reach out in other directions to get support & have found it in places I may not have looked had I just let it all go emotionally.  This has been where I learned to depend on God.  He directs the overflow.   I have come to appreciate this part of the process.  God is Faithful.

Sometimes when a dam has served it's full purpose - the water is released. It is released with purpose.  When the need to demolish the dam out weighs the need to keep it, then it is necessary to tear it down. ( I actually did some reading on dams as God gave me this image - they are very interesting structures.)  God is calling me to share our story. 

I sense Him urging me to continue to give Him ALL my emotions & He will perfectly orchestrate how they will best flow. He intends for me to reveal through writing publicly about Aspergers how He has journeyed with me.  He has directed my path & how He has helped me to raise up one pretty incredible young man despite the odds.

God did not make a mistake when He created my Aspergers son.  That truth alone has helped me be vigilant in looking for the good in even the most trying of circimstances.

May God be glorified in my sharing & in each life this story touches.

I have been finishing a book that is near & dear to me titled "My Life Is Not A Label" by Jerry Newport.  He is an adult who is diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome.  It is a book that is so full of wisdom & humor -  it is a must read for anyone familiar with Aspergers.  It is not the 1st book I have read & most likely will not be the last - you can be sure of that.  This is a topic I have become extremely passionate about supporting.  It is the foremost area I have been encouraged to write about myself.

See our middle son who is 15 also has this same diagnosis.  It is this journey from when he was 1st diagnosed at 7 yrs old to now that is a success story because he has truely come a long way - By God's Grace.  I hardly know where to begin.  Today he amazes me more often then he frustrates me.  I love to tell the most recent of his accomplishments like he has taken a year of Culinary Arts classes & spoils us with gourmet meals but on the same token, truth be told, getting here was concerning & scary.  And that too I believe is important to write about. Although much more difficult to share- someone reading this can know I do relate & that there is hope for growth.  Hang on. 

Our son has become one of my heros.

I guess a good place to begin would be to help define Aspergers & for the sake of space - you can read about it here at www.aspergersmn.org.

Today there are so many wonderful resources available. Tony Atwood, Lliane Wiley, Stephen Shores, Jerry Newport  & Temple Grandin are just a few of the incredible speakers & authors that through their testimonies have held my hand.  The internet has been a life-line.  To all that have been rallying together to get the word out about Aspergers Syndrome - my utmost gratitude. 

However - there is still much to do to get the word out & create awareness.

There is still so much support needed!

I guess that's why I know I need to write - I am still so surprised when April which is Autism Awareness Month can go by without even a blip in our state's news.  In fact I work with a gal who told me a producer said it was not newsworthy enough to do a story - hmmm.  

We as parents are overwhelmed.  We have all we can do to manage our 1 sometimes 2 or 3 children affected.   I needed then to focus on my son & whatever little change I could effect to help him.  I look back now & can only describe it in terms of feeling desperate, misunderstood, & oddly alone. 

OK - There's a whole puzzle to put together.   My sons picture is emerging more quickly now & as I said earlier (if you've stuck with me this long - points for you ) it is more amazing than I ever could have imagined.  At least since he was about 3 yrs. old - that is when - well - we began to notice our son was somewhat different.  He had a very noticeable aversion to different fabrics, required very little sleep, spoke very few words & was easily outsmarted by his 18 mos. old brother.  In fact it was because of our youngest son that these things began to concern us. As he would hit his growing milestones head on - our middle son did not.  At first I just chalked it up to it being a boy thing.  Since we had a girl 1st & she zipped along without any delay - I thought maybe boys were slower until our youngest took off.  Then again I thought "they're all different so we'll see what happens."  He was after all what appeared to be a very content little guy.  Usually smiling & happy to be either bouncing on something or going around in circles.  It looked like play to me. 

I know better now.

Little did I know then what would be just around the corner.  If you saw me right now you would see tears streaming down my face.  I would change everything if I could then again I wouldn't change a thing.

I need to stop here.  I can hardly see  the screen.  It all seems like a lifetime ago yet in this moment only yesterday.  This writing at night when everyones in bed can be a little too cathartic.  Didn't expect that.

So to where I began this post - I'll do my best to post where we have been & where we are today on this adventure with an Aspie in the family.  Maybe I can even get my son to write some (he has some cool insight).  Also I'd like my youngest & oldest to include their feelings.  It is why so many different decisions were made in our lives. 

I'll end with this for tonight - for Mother's Day the kids got me this rather large plaque that now graces a wall all it's own to remind us everyday:

"God doesn't give us what we can handle; God helps us handle what we are given"

AMEN

I can totally relate to Lois Lane too.  He is both the professional business man who comes off  abit gulliable & superhero who takes my breath away. 

I was already divorced for a year & a single mom.  Meeting a guy was absolutely no where on my agenda.  But meet him I did.  He struck a cord with me instantly.  My heart flipped.  He asked for my number - I gave him my work number.  He called - we did lunch - I ran - he chased.  Simply put he pursued & I to this day am amazed by him.

He asked me to marry him on New Years Eve 1989.  He is a man with purpose - he is a man of action - he is a giver - he is committed - he has integrity.  In all these years since he has never wavered from wanting me to feel special.  He has turned out to be the perfect step-dad to my daughter.  He spends time with his sons.  They aspire to be like their dad.  He is a man that stands for God & country with no apology.  He is truely my best friend.

By day he goes to work &  he is the man you want on any start-up team.  You'd not suspect just how much he has done to go the extra mile.  He looks for no credit.  There's a job to do & you can count on him to do it.  He serves those he works with.  He is respected in his industry for his wisdom & wit.

He works in time for us too.  Family dinners are still possible here.  Family movie nights are rarely missed.  He has always been the one to seek me out for a date night.  I can look forward to him wanting to just get a cup of coffee or wisking me off to see the latest musical production.  If something needs to be done at home - he's on it.

He has a passion for family.  He has always made it possible for the kids & I to spend time around the country seeing our family.  He has reached out to family when they needed someone to help & he has given generously.

I would be lying if I said we have a perfect relationship - at times we don't see eye to eye.  At times I felt like writing in to those magazine Dr.s to ask - "Can This Marriage Be Saved?"  Yet we work it out & do our best to grow together vs apart.  We've been married now going on 17 years in September.  I am blessed to have this man call me his wife.  I am blessed to share children with him. 

He still amazes me & he still takes my breath away!!

Happy Father's Day!!

I can not sleep.  Something is nawing at my subconcious yet evading me.  It seems so much has been going on - like life is on fast forward.  I am having a hard time being able to reflect on it all.  I am a slow processor living in a very high speed enviroment.  I am feeling older & somewhat resistent to how life is changing.  Part of me is excited about change.  I am no stranger to it.  Growing up my family moved frequently & being the oldest of 6 - my family dynamics were always changing.  I actually have an incredible urge to move every 2-3 yrs.  Change is necessary - like knowing it's time for your kids to move out, or to see them become more independent & therefore need me less often.  Maybe this is what feels so foreign to me.  I want to slow it down.  I am not ready to let go.

This week my middle son is off to an away camp.  This is actually his 4th time.  He attended this camp once as a camper & has since been a jr. volunteer.  He is planning to attend several weeks actually with a quick stay at home in between.  As I was helping him pack he felt he had to remind me several times that he's done this before.  I guess I was not trusting him & he's really asking me to do just that - trust him.  Let him show me he can do more on his own now.  I am hearing that more & more from him.  He also now has his drivers permit.  Because I am with him more - I get the honor of having him drive me places.  (I have a "don't let them see me sweat" philiosphy & for the most part appear calm - that is until necessary like we're offroading when we should not be.)  The other day he drove 34 miles (he keeps track) & did very well. 

He's handling this growing up thing much better than me!!

Raising kids is a journey I felt so unprepared for.  They are masterpieces of God's handy work & I have the privilege to have a part in helping them see that.

The other day my youngest son (14) had the distinct pleasure of working with my dear friend who offered a drama camp (you can read about this at annointed's blog - check out my friends link).  He wound up actually performing a part.  He does have theater experience however did not expect to be cast as his intention was to be a counslor so to speak & assist my friend with the kids.  Just prior to this past week he spent time in Texas with his grandparents who fortuntely he adores & would have stayed longer if not for his committment here.  So other then spending brief moments in the car - I did not see much of him.  Now of course I attended the final days performance but I have to admit I was not prepared for it.  The drama was done very well (my friend is quite gifted) that was not a surprise but what was was seeing my son perform a duet.  He played the giant to a very little guy (7) who played Jack.  The contrast was moving.  Here's my son - very much looking like a young man, singing in his now much lower bass voice & Jack who is still so very little singing in that very cute high little boy voice. 

What I saw was then & now.  What I felt in my heart was emotional to say the least.

It all feels like just yeaterday I was harried, at times very overwhelmed by all my kids needs, pushing myself to keep rising to the challenge of this assignment from God to raise these 3 special people. 

Oh how I cherish how messy & unpredictable those early years were.

God  - Continue to grant me your wisdom & peace as I reach this final leg of rearing your works of art.   May they bless you as they grow to walk in your ways & hear your voice guiding them as they reach beyond our home.  Thank you for entrusting them to me.  Help me to continue to let go more & more & fully entrust them to you.  Amen

I was in the process of finishing a post earlier today - when all was quiet on the home front & all of a sudden I hit the back key in error   All my thoughts were lost.  As was my time.  I had to run off & just stew over my lost entry. Now I have a brief moment to attempt to recapture where I was going as I was about to finish writing earlier today.  Let's see if I can manage it one more time.

The other day we were delightfully surprised to hear that my hubby's grandmother (80 yrs old & a newlywed   ) was a mere few hours away & wanted to visit - if we were up to it. We had just gotten home from a short trip to Texas, we are having our pool redone, our daughter is having the yard sale of the year (remember she moved out - well this is her way of helping clean out the house & make some $), we have 3 dogs & came home to unfortunatley losing our rabbit of 4 years to an undiscovered health challenge .  That's not all but hey someone was coming to visit us up here in Minnesota & we could not be happier!!!!   We had the most wonderful time with them.  It was a joy to entertain them & show them around where we live.

See we are the family travellers.  Ever since our kids were born my hubby & I strapped them in their car seats & off we went.  We'd spend summers in Texas where my hubby's family lives, travel to California to see my brother, Pennsylvania to visit my sisters & Florida to see my mom when she lived there (she's here in MN with us now).  Homeschooling has most definitely given me the freedom to go whenever possible.  We have been to Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon, Disney Land & Disney World.  They've seen the Liberty Bell & the Alamo to just name a few places we have loved to visit. But most importantly to my hubby & I is the relationships our kids have been able to form with their relatives.  Distance has not been a deterent to us & the legacy of their heritage has always been a deep value piece for us.

Yet I have pined over the fact that it is rare to have anyone visit us here.  That is until this year  .  My youngest sister is coming for the 4th of July with her 2 kids (1 & 3 yrs old), my youngest brother - who used to live here but is now out east - is coming with his girlfriend (whom we all really like & hope he proposes to soon) & I just got a call from my hubby's brother & he's coming with his 2 kids (3 & 5yrs old).  We are so very excited  We can hardly wait!!

Whew - well that's the gist of what I wrote earlier.  My daughter has just shown up (which she did earlier when I lost everything) with some of her friends & the boys are most surely prunes from being in the pool.  Speaking of the pool - how I love the summer!!!  I'll write about that another day.

Saving....

Shopping for me with my teenage sons was such a big event I thought I'd share about it. 

When the boys were younger I would just take them with me.  Sure they would sometimes whine but for the most part they were trapped with me.  Most of the time I'd abandon my efforts to find something that fit & we'd move on - usually to something more kid related. 

Then my daughter was old enough to babysit for a few hours & I'd bask in the glory of actually being alone in the clothes section of a store.  I'd try on outfit after outfit just because I could until I had to get back home.  Most times I'd find an item maybe two but eventually I'd choose not to go at all - there were a million other errands to do & I needed to use my time wisely (unless it was a desperate - really have nothing to wear to my hubby's bosses for dinner situation).

When my daughter decided I needed some updating - she became my much trusted personal shopper.  I don't know if I embarassed her just one time too many with my mommy wear or what but at around 16 yrs. old  she could be counted on to keep me trendy.  Shopping with her is fun even if I don't find something.  We love to try on gowns we have no reason to buy or some way funky outfit - that always looks great on her but I could be a poster for "What Not To Wear". 

Needless to say the boys have been excused from these shopping ventures & it is so rare - I can't even remember when rare  - that they escorted me on just such an outing.  We are headed out of town tomorrow & I just needed to get a couple of capris.   The boys needed to get somethings.  I am down to the wire time wise so we were to be a shopping team.  They knew a shop or two for me was part of the plan. 

Going into it they were actually supportive.  Helping me find my size, giving me their opinions & making jokes along the way.  Then they couldn't fathom why I had to make sure I had mix & match outfits.  And then....I had to try it all on.  Then...they were sent on several occasions to get another size.  Then...I actually emerged only to re-examine some tops that I didn't think I liked the 1st time I saw them. 

Now I have discovered my middle son (15) is definitley a hunter gatherer type.  He decided I was just trying to make his life miserable because certainly I have tried on atleast one outfit I must have liked by now & I should just buy it & go.  He will no longer assist in picking out any more matching accessories. 

My youngest (14) who is doing his best to hang with me on this begins to lose his stamina for it but will not give in that easily.  He is my competitive one & it's now his mission to last longer then his brother.  We finally make it to the check-out & I do have some very fun outfits I am excited about. 

My youngest informs my middle son that if he expects to have a girlfriend he better get with the program because this is what you have to put up with.  My middle son said his girl will have other interest & besides he is in no hurry to get one.  The check-out girl was cracking up.  Then I had a coupon & for $20.00 more I could save $50.00.  As both the boys tried to fathom this math equation I added 6 new underware to my pile.  Thrilled to be actually getting all that I needed & all on sale - I practically waltzed out of the store.

Do you know what my sons had to say?  "Oh mom - you're such a girl."  Well I am glad they noticed.  Having my daughter move on has created a new dynamic in our home.  One where I am often out numbered but on this day - I ruled

Have a fabulous Memorial Day Weekend!!

Ahhh - Now that those 30 weeks of grueling, hectic, very committed school weeks are finished - we can now set our sails to enjoy some calmer winds, relax & enjoy.

In the past when the boys were younger I was much more of what I have heard referred to as a relaxed homeschooler.  I liked unit studies because they gave me an opportunity to have adventures & be creative. My kids could pick a subject and we'd be off & running learning everything we could about it.

Now both the boys are taking high school courses & I struggled with whether or not  to go with the traditional class structure of learning. I am very blessed to be in an area that has a superb homeschool co-op that offers classes like biology, geometry as well as a very awesome Culinary Arts course to name a few.  Our homeschool runs on semesters. Two 15 week schedules rule our lives for part of the year. Two times a week they attend these classes & then spend the remaining days diligently working on their assignments which usually take 1 hour a day minimum each to complete.  They also take guitar lessons, Spanish lessons & are on a bowling team.  The schedule allows for a break here & there but for the most part is pretty focused.  It is not a pace I really enjoy.  However being married to a military man -  I have come to respect that it is healthy to be discplined in being diligent when called upon to complete a task.  My boys are typical in that they have their days of  " I have so much work to do & not enough time to do it & hey what about my free time"  yet they carry out what is expected of them.  They realize their ability to stretch & that is a good thing.  My boys are eager to go - they love the teachers & so during the traditional school year - it works.

I have come to realize that I am a traditional school homeschooler during the typical school year - September through May but then  - AHHH - why I loved homeschooling in the 1st place - being a relaxed homeschooler over the summer.  This is when I am in my element!!  This is when I revel in experiencing who my boys are - their bents.  Sure I see this during the year as well but it is more driven & directed.  Now I see the natural curiosity take over. For example my middle son (15) who took the Culinary Arts classes continues to show us his eager interest in cooking by making us out of this world dishes, my youngest son (14) can be heard from any place in the house - anytime of day playing his guitar.  We have a few adventures planned this summer where learning is not quite as obvious but as any homeschooler knows - lessons for life are taught here.

My youngest son was vocalizing his desire to go to a private school many of his friends will be attending next year.  My husband & I were not eager to pursue this option.  So we all just kept praying about it.  Well our answer came from him on his last day at co-op.  As he got in the car he looked over at me & proclaimed "I can't wait to go back here next year!" 

Until the winds of fall shift us back in high gear - you will find us hanging out, savoring the easy going breeze & homeschooling at a different pace.

Today we are picking up our daughter from college.  She has just finished her sophmore year & instead of moving home - she is moving into a townhome.  Even though she has been gone at school - she would come home for the weekend now & then.  Her stuff was still intwined with ours.  Evidence of her could still be found as she left things behind when she would head back to school.

Her room here at home is now empty.  Completely bare.

I was getting dressed to go out the other day & it felt so strange not having her stuff there to share - like jewlery :)  She has the funkiest playful jewelry which I love to borrow on occasion. (She likes to borrow my "real" jewelry so I know she'll miss me too.) 

Yes, I know we'll continue to stay close.  We have fortunately forged a relationship bond that is strong. I can't help but feel sad & happy at the same time.  Sad because I love to be in her space, I love her creative energy, I love to see her all undone when she wakes in the morning & put together as she goes out. I hope we will always be so comfortable with each other, that words are not always necessary when together - we can just be in the same space.  I am happy because isn't this what us mom's do - grow our kids up to stand on their own.  I am so grateful to watch the seeds I know I planted take root as she ventures out on her own with confidence.  To hear her acknowledge the positive impact homeschooling her has on her ability to handle the pressures of college.  To listen to her as she shares how she navigates the issues life throws at her & hear wisdom. 

To be here for her when she still needs me to be but to also let go - How did my mother do it?  My mother is an incredble example for me.  Her council is this "Trust God."  I remember thinking "That's it?"  Thankfully - gratefully - mercifully -THAT'S IT.  In knowing my Abba Father's love is in such abundance & He is my daughter's Abba Father too - I can rest in His assurance that He watches out for her even when I am not there.

I still have 2 teenage boys at home to continue raising.  One says he'll never leave home.  I think every family has one that says that.  For right now though it's his way of caring for me but I know it's my job to give him the wings to fly when the right time comes.  Till that time - I will savor each moment

I have a confession - I have lurked around here for sometime now & even contributed a comment or two here & there but I can not say I thought I'd actually fully join in.  Well here I am & those that know me will say it's about time.

This is a wonderful community.  The idea of having so many voices share their stories is encouraging to say the least.  To keep a record of the experiences you have through this journey of homeschooling & raising children is invaluable.

I begin by hoping that I can bring something from my own story that would be of value.  To share some of where I've been. 

With all that being said - Maybe you can relate - as I sit here with the intention to write more - I have become the most needed person in my families universe & I must attend to them:)    I'm sure I will find the time in my day to spend some more time here.  This however is not it.  It IS the middle of the day.  So I will have to wander back at another time which I will be looking forward to doing.

Till then -

Take the time to hug your children & tell them you love them:)