I need some prayers. I'll explain by telling a bit of a story...
When I was about ten years old my family moved from town to come live near my Grandpa and Uncle's farm. When we first moved I didn't have any friends. I didn't know anyone and spent most of my time playing with my brothers or by myself (which by the way, isn't a bad thing). After being there a little while and not having any friends, I kinda gave up on any ideas of making friends.
Then one day I was in the front yard playing with our dog when a girl who looked to be about my age rode past on her bike. I smiled at her and then went in the house. I think by this point in time I didn't want friends anymore. I was a little scared to be too close with people I didn't know. So anyway, later that day the same girl rode past again. She stopped her bike on the road and from there it went something like this:
Her-"Hey, do you live here?"
Me-"Yeah. We moved in a few months ago."
Her-"Oh. Do you go to the Notus school?"
Me-"No, I'm homeschooled."
Her-"So that's why I never see you around!"
Me-"Ha, yeah."
...Awkward silence.
Her-"What's you name?"
Me-"Nikki."
Her-"You don't look like a Nikki."
Me-"Oh. What's your name?"
Her-"Lindsey."
Me-"Do you live down the road?"
Her-"Yeah. With my grandparents and my dad."
From there on it was about the same. Me, totally shy and a little freaked out by this out-going, public school girl on her fancy bike telling me that my name doesn't fit me. And her trying to sum up the freak who appears to have no contact with the outside world. We ended up playing together for most of that summer. I don't really know why. I wasn't sure what I thought about her and I'm not sure she liked me that much, but we still hung out. Go figure.
After that summer my family moved again. This time only up the road a little ways. Lindsey moved, too. She moved closer to her school. Still not far from me, but not close enough to ride her bike over anymore. I know my mom was never thrilled with me being around Lindsey, but I think she prayed that I might be a bit of a good influence on her. As the time passed I saw less and less of her. Most of this was my own doing. I was afraid of what being her friend might get me into. When I did hear from her she always went on about being a cheerleader and her boyfriend and how she was going to some party or something. I was thinking about how messed up it was that someone so young could even be thinking about such things.
So to avoid the problem I just hid. I didn't give her our new phone number when we got a new one. I didn't go over to her house anymore, and we just grew apart. And I was thankful for this. Don't get me wrong, I wanted to help her. But I didn't feel like I could. I'm not yet that strong spiritually myself, how could I ever help her?? I did continue to pray for her every night. And I would often wonder what she was up to, thinking that it couldn't be good. How could it? She didn't have anyone looking after her! Her dad worked all the time and she doesn't even know her mom. So I prayed, I thought, and I moved on.
Until yesterday. Yesterday a 1975 Candy-Apple Red Firebird rolled into our driveway. Out of the Firebird came a bleached blond Lindsey (she used to have brown hair) in her short shorts and skimpy tank-top. She gave me a big hug and asked how I have been. I blinked and stuttered and probably answered in really stupid ways. Thankfully my dad was there and played the part of a polite and sensible human being. After a while though he went into the shop to 'let you girls talk'. In my mind I was going "But I don't want to!" But outside I tried to be nice and fairly talkative. At one point she looked at me and said,
"You've lost weight!"
"Yeah, I started running this year."
After that she came over and felt my scrawny arms and grinned. I then said,
"Yes, I'm still weak. You were always stronger than me."
She just giggled and went on about how she has to be in shape because she's on the cheer-leading team and so on. She asked me if I wanted to go to the Fair with her and her boyfriend. I told her I would ask, because in the past when I would say no right away she would get mad at me. She said she would stop by today and see if I could. She never came. I'm not sure what's going on. Why did God bring her back into my life? What am I supposed to do? I don't know any of this! To close this little whatever-ya-call-it post I will just ask for prayers. I really need to look to the Lord right now for guidance. I have no plans of spending time with her, but I need to know how to deal with the situations I know I'm going to be put in. So please pray. And any advise would be very much appreciated.
Thank you.
~Nikki
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