Nov. 20, 2006 - OMG!
Ok, I was freaking out, because I had to do a skit thing at church, only I wasn't acting, it was saying memorized verses, and I was flipping out. I e-mailed one of my BFFs, like, three times saying how nervous I was.
Anyway, I'm listening to Hannah Montana.
Did I read that sign right?
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT
GOES OUT
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR
FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE
DRAINING BOARD
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR
WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:(I sure hope so)
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE
1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T
WORK)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn! to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh
A newborns conversation with God:
A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow,
but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"
God said, "Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of
you."
The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to
do anything but sing and smile to be happy."
God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And
you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."
Again the child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when
people talk to me if I don't know the language?"
God said,
"Your angel will tell you the most
beautiful and sweet words
you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will
teach you how to speak."
"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you
how to pray."
"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its
life."
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach
you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to
you."
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth
could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave
now, please tell me my angel's name."
God said, "You will simply call her, "Mom."
Lift a mother's spirit, send this to every mother you know (no matter
how old her child is)
Isn't that sweet???????
you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will
teach you how to speak."
"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you
how to pray."
"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its
life."
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach
you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to
you."
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth
could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave
now, please tell me my angel's name."
God said, "You will simply call her, "Mom."
Lift a mother's spirit, send this to every mother you know (no matter
how old her child is)
Isn't that sweet???????
