I think this has been my week to end all weeks.  So, in brief, here is how my week played out:

~ My 2 oldest were in swimming lessons all week .  1 passed, one failed.

~ My 2 oldest were in their softball tournament this weekend  ~ they lost all their games.

~ My son had a nasty collision at 3rd base and the other player got hurt.  For a five year old this is very traumatic.

~ My son left Saturday night to go with his grandparents to family camp for a week.  He called later that night in tears, wanting to come home.  Can I feel any more guilty?

~Today, we took my daughter to her week of camp.  Her very first time away without any family around.  Considering she is a very social girl, she spent much of last night crying for us not to make her go.

~ I am in charge of our VBS program in two weeks, and getting that planned has been a nightmare.

~ And finally, my 2 year old is sick with a nasty cold.

So, I have come to the conclusion that my week has been more traumatic then my children's.  I am feeling like the worst parent in the world.  I left 2 of my children at camps where all they want to do is just come home.  Now I know that tomorrow they with both be feeling better and they won't want to come home.  I've been there and I remember the fear.  But it passes and it will make them stronger.

Finally, what everyone has been saying all along might be true.  I must be homeschooling because I can't cut the apron strings and let them go to school.  I miss them already.  I'm proud of that though.  I am proud of the fact that I don't want to ship my children off to schools and daycares.  I'm proud that I miss them and I am proud that I can't wait for them to come home.  I am proud that I don't want to cut apron strings.  There is plenty of life for them to live independant of me.  For now, I want them to stay children for alittle while longer and I want to be the one to see their milestones not a teacher or daycare worker.