Super Mom has crashed & burned,Long live REAL Mom !

Nov. 28, 2008

prayer request

There are so many things going on with me
right now I really don't know where to start. My health is not good and
I really need to be under Drs. care but don't have insurance so I've
just been going day to day. My husband is back to work (I'm pretty sure
I had told you all that at least) but after him being out of work for
almost 4 months we are still in terrible financial shape. Right now we
are struggling to heat the house and keep the kids warm. We only have
space heaters for now because we can not afford to fill the propane
tank. Its very hard as a Mommy to see my children cold and unable to
make it better for them, it makes me feel like a terrible parent.
The holidays coming up add all the more stress. I won't have very much
to put under the tree for the kids. The older kids understand and its
not such a big deal, they are in their teens, but I feel so sad about
my youngest, they are only 8 and 2 and still beleive in Santa. Its hard.
I also have not been on my anti-depression medicine for about two
months now. I didn't have the money to refill it or see a Dr. so I just
stopped takig it. Obviously this is not good on me. My anxiety and
depession have just gotten worse and worse. I have been staying in the
house most of the time,totally isolated. I moved here to KY when I
married my husband 9 years ago. Since I have moved here I have not made
one single close friend. I also have no family near by so I really
don't have anywhere to go to get out of the house and talk with other
adults. I FINALLY did go to a therapist today. It was only a intake
first visit so we didn't go over too much, but it is a start, one step
toward helping myself. I realized when I went though that it was the
first time I had stepped foot out of the house since two and a half
weeks ago! That can't be healthy. I wanted to go out with all my kids
this weekend to a Christmas celebration in our little town but now my
van broke down. We have no money to take it to get fixed so we are
having to make due with just using our one small car for now. The
little car only seats four people total. That means even when hubby
isn't driving it, I can't go anywhere with my kids because we don't all
fit. I am actually totally skipping Thanksgiving this year. My house is
too cold and in disrepair to have anyone over and I don't have the van
to take anyone out either so I am stuck.Well I am just rambing here.
This is how my brain is right now, just a jumbled mess. Please pray for
and pray for my dear children and husband as they deal with me.
Thanks~Carole

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About Me

The real life adventures of a Mother of 7 children, plus 2 step-kids trying to homeschool, housekeep, and deal with Health issues,eBay,organizing,depression,faith,financial strains,large family living,etc.