I hit the wall last week as far as over-load goes. You know the kind that comes from doing what you love to do but finding that there isn't enough of you to go around to cover all the things you truly want to do. Getting over-tired and feeling like you are dropping 2/3rds of the balls you care very much about juggling and juggling well. No one coerced me insto saying yes when I wanted to say no. I wanted to say yes, yes, and yes. So many things I absolutely want to do. So many people I want to bless. But I have discovered there is less of me than I thought there was.

This week I have taken a step back and tried to get my balance again. It has been very helpful to have the work load lifted for a bit. I feel much better and it has given me time to recharge my batteries a bit physically. I let myself get way too tired over the course of the last 6 months labor with VHSG. Emotionally, I needed some readjustment time as I face the fact that VHSG will not be far enough along by the fall term, a mere five weeks away, to consider it sustainable this go around. I cannot keep the pace I was running at and looking at what additional load was staring me in the face with teaching 3 levels of math classes, a new e-notebooking class, a phonics class coming online, a local family looking to get that last summer biology co-op in, another wanting an algebra class to come online for fall, and my own kids needs taking the back seat over and over. Too much to teach much less have to build from the ground up in course material. Too many needs and too little help for all that was needed and would be needed.

During this rest I have had the pleasure of watching my son learn to drive first hand. John's shop is down due to a column on the press breaking so he will be there well past supper. Today he drove all the way to John's work and back home again, about 50 miles round trip to take John something to eat. This driving practice session included starting, backing, driving at highway speeds, and lots of curves and hills. He did super!

Zach and I had a great time having a squirt gun fight which turned into scrubbing the car with lots of bubbles. I am going to post about it on Zach's blog tonight.

I also visited with the local art gallery to show my paintings. I have stopped in often but never had anything with me to share the work I like to do. I was in town anyway to take Melody to a birthday party, so I decided to actually bring some pieces in. I don't want to place them with a gallery; though, college expenses a mere 4 to 5 weeks away I have to admit to feeling that fishing for the possibility in the future is wise however unwanted the possiblity is. The gallery commission is about 40% of the total sale which is a pretty typical rate. It doesn't leave much though once the artist considers materials, time, and framing that comes out of the artist's share. I do not want to go gallery if I can help it.

Beginning to do commision work again will take a lot of time that I feel is needed for homeschooling. Zachary is going into learning how to read and I want to bless him with the fun that the older kids had when they were his age and doing KONOS. KONOS is lots of hands on and lots of mommy being there to have the fun hands-on with. We hadn't discovered notebooking back when the older kids did KONOs, but with Zach I want to e-notebook his adventures so he has them to treasure. 

So, I am praying that tuition, gas, and car insurance coverage for our first year's experience with college will come without having to give up that time with him. I did quite a lot of commsision work while doing KONOS with the older kids; however, I am not as spry as I used to be. I remember full well how much it took in time and energy to juggle a home business and homeschooling when the older kids were young. After coming out from hitting an over-commitment wall just this week, the clouds on the horizon of doing commissions make me feel like I am destined to be breathless again. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love painting and I have missed not having time to do any except the few weeks at Christmas - my Christmas gift to myself while the kids are off for the holidays. It is just the busy-ness of business where I have to work every minute to keep all the balls in the air that I am dreading.

Well, this true rest this week will be an important refreshing to fill my tanks back up for whatever the near future holds.