Deus audiam
• 12 December 2007 - In for a quick fix!
I am stopping in again to say hello. What's going on? Well, sometimes I wish the baby would get here tomorrow, and sometimes I wish it were more like July when the little addition arrives (this is my husband's daily desire!).
I have been experiencing some major indigestion, for lack of a better term, and in researching this (yes, I'm still quite the over-achiever when it comes to the nitty-gritty), I have found that it's quite likely that I actually have too little acid, instead of not enough, and that may be the cause of the indigestion. Funny, I know, but I was a self-contained chemistry experiment to help determine the cause of the problem. If pineapple helped, the acid was too low, if rice helped, too high. A little pineapple, some relief. A little more pineapple, AUGH! Add some rice, okay. A little more rice, AUGH! back to a little pineapple, a little better. Too much pineapple, AUGH!
Yes, I'm also still quite strange. But, it is always interesting to be learning, even when there's pain involved (mine, that is!).
Back soon, I hope.
Nighty-night.
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• 27 November 2007 - I'm back
I didn't really drop off the face of the earth, although it may seem that way. I don't even know where to begin with such a drastic absence.
So much of what I do I have to question, to see if it's really what I need or should be doing for God's glory, and I can't always answer yes. I've been doing that a lot lately.
I'd like to say school is going smoothly, but it's not. I'd like to say I'm all ready for the baby, but I'm not. I'd like to say my life is gliding along wonderfully, but it's not.
I've a need to be on my knees right now, because I so cannot do all that there is to do in my life without my Lord. I know that's an okay place to be, too, so I'm not complaining. I'm sort of in stall mode right now, or could it be more likely DENIAL?
Does it all go away if you pretend it's not there? Well, no. It does not. But we do try, sometimes, don't we?
I'm alright, though. Not suffering any major problems, pregnancy is going well (only about 9 weeks left), kids are all fine, husband on normal stress alert as usual, so there's really no need for concern.
I just stopped blogging. I have to wonder why? Why blog, why do this, why do that? What does God get out of me doing this or that?
That is where I am. I'll be back. Thanks for stopping in.
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• 17 October 2007 - Christmas in October
Okay, what food makes you think Christmas?
Anyone, anyone?
Our Homeschool Group's Newsletter Crew is getting together for a Test Kitchen soon, and we're testing recipes that will go into our December Newsletter. Last year was so much fun, and so very, very tasty.
My family are candy-makers. I thought that when I got my gas cooktop, all of a sudden I would be a candy-maker too, but I guess it doesn't work that way. But, they still make, and I still eat, and I bring cheesecake.
Works for me. I happen to really like cheesecake, so, that's good.
We also make cookies. I like those a lot as well. Hmmm. . . I am beginning to see a pattern here.
Yes, I like dessert. It can be the main course for all I care. Turkey's alright and all, but bring on the sweets!
Deep breaths now.
Got any suggestions for Christmas food? Desserts are just fine, you see. But I like my stuffing and turkey, too. I really do.
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• 10 October 2007 - First Do No Harm
I have no idea if this is a book, movie, or both, but I've neither read it, nor seen it.
I simply like the idea. It needs to be a motto of mine. I've been thinking a lot about the idea of being a "harmless" individual. It really is what we are supposed to be doing as believers in Christ, and as "little Christs", which is what "Christian" means.
Building up each other, esteeming others better than ourselves, trying not to give offense, living peaceably, if possible, with others.
I need some definite work in every one of these areas. My kids and I were reading in Hosea Chapter 3 yesterday, and it reminded me of a true story another friend of mine shared about a prostitute that she knows. The situation was nearly identical to what Hosea was instructed by God to do. I shared it with my children, and cried the whole time.
I couldn't help it. God's Word is so relevant today.
What are we doing, if we are not trying to reach the World for Christ? What am I teaching my children if not the love of others? I need that love, too. I need to be showing them, daily, how to live a selfless life. How to constantly lift others across the globe, and across the street, up to Chirst.
I need to be dead to self. I need to share with my children that life is not about the here and now, but about eternity, every moment.
Death to Janelle. Long live the King.
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• 4 October 2007 - Purging, Purging, Gone.
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Well, that is the idea, anyway. I’ve joined up on a Purge challenge. It’s for the month of October, in hopes that we will all be in the habit by the end of the month.
I’ll give you the link, because, I don’t know how to do it in a fancy way (sorry, still VERY illiterate when it comes to these things).
http://hiddenart.wordpress.com/2007/10/01/purge-stuff-challenge/
Now, what have I done so far? Ummm, well, I uh, let’s see. . . hmmm. . . Oh, yeah! I decided against an impulse buy at a link given by one of those taking the challenge (shame on her, although it did look ever-so-tempting).
But, seriously, my family and I have just come off of a two-week clean-and-purge, and I’m telling you, we were all a bit fatigued after that. I am off my relax-and-stop-the-mad-woman-cleaning-spree, and back at it again. Mine is definitely going to be a bit slower, now. I plan on cleaning an area for 15 minute spurts, at a few nicely timed intervals throughout the day, or going through a box a day (I have boxes, boy do I have boxes).
I believe the whole “gee-my-house-looks-cleaner” thing is enough to keep me motivated. We visited my parents over the weekend, and my mom sort of looked at me dumb-founded when I told her we’d been cleaning, actually CLEANING for two weeks. I believe it was kind of along the lines of “What could you possibly have in your house that would take two weeks to clean, and you say you’re still not done?”
I know, I know. My husband and I have been married for over 17 years now, and both of us tend to sort of, well, you know, save stuff?
It is freeing to be rid of things, though. Two of the things that are going are trophies from a boating race from the 1950’s. Neither one of them is engraved, but we got them from my husband’s grandpa. Go figure. They’re still here because of what? Sorry, can’t answer that one. But, say bye-bye now.
Please join me if you will. It will only hurt a little.
Really.
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• 2 October 2007 - Sunrise
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I don’t always get up to enjoy the sunrise, and certainly not in the summer. Most nights I go to bed late, even though I prefer the mornings, and so, sleep in.
Today, however, I got to see the sun rise. We have a vacant lot on our east, and the eastern border of that property is a treeline, which extends both north and south of the property. At the anticipation of the rising of the sun, the trees light up with a flaming magenta glow, which slowly brightens to a brilliant orange-red glow as the sun advances over the horizon.
As I watched this magnificent sight this morning, I also looked up in the sky to see the last star twinkling overhead. I waited to see at what moment I could no longer see the star. I was not disappointed in the meantime, as the sky continued to brighten, with shades of pink and periwinkle rising above my head. As the clouds above, before unseen, began to take on a rosy blush, the star vanished into the day.
My daughters’ room is the very periwinkle of the sky as the sun is rising in the east. Their window faces the sunrise, and I matched the paint to that color one morning as the sun was coming up. It is a glorious color, which never ceases to delight me.
Reflecting on God’s artistry, I am in awe of his majesty, and the beauty that he chooses to bestow upon us. Being a shadow of things to come, it is so hard for me to fathom the glory we have yet to behold.
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• 27 September 2007 - Not Just a Bad Hair Day
It's funny. I was looking at a friend's blog, over at hiddenart.wordpress.com, who always manages to cheer me up (sorry I haven't commented yet, amanda), and she had an entry about vanity. Coloring our hair is just the tip of the iceberg, truly. I don't color mine. Yes, I'm going slowly silver, in a nutshell. But, my darling dog-lover daughter thinks those are the most beautiful of my hairs, and several years ago, she saved one, thinking it so very valuable.
Today, however, I didn't feel so valuable. It was more than just a bad hair day, it was a very depressed day.
We've been cleaning (I did mention that, didn't I?), and I'm anxious to get back to school, and yet overwhelmed at the thought of it, too. I have more things to add to our schedule, and as I've mentioned a time or two, I'm not real organized. It's hard for me sometimes to see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.
I need to reflect more. More on God's Word, that is, and not on my circumstances. I feel overwhelmed at being the Mom and guide to five children (well, four plus one on the way, that is). I feel overwhelmed at being the wife I should be to my gracious husband. I feel overwhelmed at the example I should be to other believers, even, when I open my big, fat, sometimes unleashed, mouth (James 3 should be my abode quite often).
So, today, when it was time for Bible reading, first thing after prayer (yes, I had already prayed), we went to work on our memory verse. My youngest son needs to memorize two a week for the next four weeks to get caught up in church on his verses because he wants to get the year-end prize (bad motivator, perhaps? But I guess it really doesn't work for those who wouldn't be doing it anyway). For the extra verse, I picked out a different verse than the one we're all working on, and started to recite it.
With his head turned away from me, his elbow on his knee and chin in hand, he begins to mumble back what I am saying. His sister is to my left, talking, and the door to the laundry room right next to us is open with both the washer and dryer running, and the fan is on overhead. I don't believe I've shared before, but I am also deaf in one ear. It was the one closest to my son.
I asked him to look at me, get his chin out of his hand and speak up. He began to question me, and in frustration, I said, "NEVER MIND!"
And I turned to the verse we all were working on. I got through it once, before I couldn't go on. The tears welled up, and I felt miserable. I asked my oldest son to work on it, and left the room.
I needed to pray again. And sob.
I came back, a little better now, so we could go on. I told my son I couldn't help him unless he let me. We read in the OT from Daniel 5 and 6. Both very powerful chapters about faith in God and consequences of the lack thereof. The writing on the wall and the lion's den for Daniel.
My daughter asked why Belshazzar, Nebuchadnezzar's son, didn't believe God if he had seen what God did to his father? It's like so many of us, who, having seen the power of God, choose to deny it in our own lives. Lesson for Mom.
Then, from chapter 6, I was asked if Darius believed in God before Daniel was delivered. Well, Darius had seen Daniel's continual faith, and believed, apparently that because Daniel was such a good man, his God must be good, too, I suppose. But, most definitely he believed afterwards.
Remember when Jesus told Thomas that those who had not seen, yet believed were blessed in John 20:29? What am I looking for?
God has been faithful to me every day, and in every way. I have no right to be depressed. I have no right to question my circumstances. How human I am. How empty without Him.
What was the verse I was working on with my son, that he wouldn't cooperate on?
"And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity." 1Corinthians 13:13
Lesson for Mom.
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• 21 September 2007 - What a Week!
This has been quite the week!
We're all ready for a rest. We took off school this week to do a major overhaul of the house. We're not done, unfortunately, and I believe we're in for another week. My husband was teasing the children, "Clean this week, clean next week, then it's time for Painting!"
You should have seen my oldest son. His heart was fainting. Poor thing. DD was like, "Cool!"
Yes, I'm Spring Cleaning. Yes, it's Fall, but since I missed Spring cleaning this past spring (and the year before that, and the year before that, and the. . . yep, I'm a slob), and I am sure it won't be the first thing on my list NEXT spring, with the new baby and all--we are doing it now.
Do you know what unfinished basements are for? What's that? Stuff?
Wrong! Spiders is the correct answer. And lots of them. I mean LOTS and LOTS of them. EWWWWW!
I vacuumed out an area of the greatest need so I could set up tables (don't want anything on the floor), to put my boxes on that need sorting--so I can sort and pitch, and save, and what ever.
I also emptied my closet of unused clothing. Now, I need to sort and pitch it. I have clothes from High School in there, and that was a really, REALLY long time ago now.
Baby clothes I should have saved more of, apparently. Live and learn.
That's what I'm trying to do. Live and learn. It's all going to burn, and I don't need so much of it. Stuff, that is. The pitching is so hard for me, but I really do want to be a good example for my kids. We've all worked very hard this week. I am so pleased with their efforts.
We'll be celebrating my eldest's 15 year birthday this weekend, and doing something special just for fun.
I'll update you when we're through. |
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• 14 September 2007 - It's a Boy!
We had our sonogram on Wednesday, and found out our baby is a boy. Due date mid-to-late January (still conflicting info, but Dr. is going with January 29).
I had thought when I was pregnant with my little Baby Wig, whom I thought to be a girl from the get-go, how cool it would be to have a trio of boys. A trinity, if you will. I was not disappointed in getting her, she’s wonderful, but with this one, I thought it would be a boy, and so he is.
I am anxious to meet this new little person, but I am fine with waiting (Oh MY!), and to see what he will become. My first two exemplify characteristics of both the Father (firstborn, obviously), and the Holy Spirit. It took me awhile to figure this out about Puddle Jumpers.
He is so very full of life. He sometimes tests my limits with his lack of fear, or his (perceived) lack of judgment, at times. But something I have come to see in him is how he doesn’t testify of himself. This is truly a characteristic of the Holy Spirit. How is it that he does this?
Well, he obviously looks up to his Big Brother, and many of his opinions are formed based on what information he is given. It’s not that he’s not smart, he’s incredibly bright, and has a very keen sense of understanding, enlightening me on many things I don’t think about. What is different, though, is it’s as if the way he gives the information back is not HIS knowledge, just a way of sharing what he’s been told in a more precise light.
Also, at Tae Kwon Do, I have begun to notice that he doesn’t always seem so sure of himself. He watches others (me included, oh, we are both in trouble if he’s following me) to be sure of himself. It’s not that he doesn’t know it, he’s been doing this stuff coming up on four years now. The difference is he doesn’t testify of himself. He will mirror what others who appear to know what they are doing (not me, not me!). So, it comes in handy for him to be privately instructed at home with Big Brother, and practicing again and again and again.
The lack of fear, a Comforter trait. The lack of judgment, not what it appears, either, I’m sure. The Bible says that as you don’t know where the wind comes from or where it goes, so it is with the Spirit. I just don’t always understand what’s going on in all those little cogs and wheels of his mind. Because, something is definitely always brewing.
So, for the third. . . characteristics of Christ, perhaps? If so, I’m sure all of them will be glad he wasn’t born first! LOL! |
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• 6 September 2007 - Creation, Moses, and my teenager
Today my freshman student had to read a Creation Myth from Ancient Egypt as part of his work for Year 1 TOG. He came to me as he was reading this, and asked me, “Why am I reading this again?”
You see, up until now, I’ve been very cautious about the reading choices we’ve had. We have discussed the beliefs of others, and I’ve tried to point them to where the breakdown in the reasoning is. We all have it. A breakdown point. Man’s wisdom is not the same as God’s, and so, in every man-held belief where we assume into the text some thing that is not recorded anywhere in God’s word, there is going to be a breakdown. I am not necessarily always able to find it. I try. I trust God for the rest. If I am wrong, I do not mind being told. I’ll believe what I believe until proven wrong.
What I want for my children is the ability to discern these things on their own. There comes a time in their reasoning ability where they are better equipped to think through these processes better. I haven’t wanted to bombard them with a lot of stuff contrary to the Word of God without their ability to discern.
I feel my eldest is mature enough now. So, I talked to him about it. My bible says that the first five books of the bible were written by Moses. A good time for him to have done it would have been when the Israelites were wandering in the desert for 40 years, although I don't know if this is when it happened, or not. But the thought is, that these redeemed of the LORD, having been in captivity some 400 years or so may not have retained the knowledge of the story of their beginnings. Some may have begun to believe the things the Egyptians believed. Moses' books would have been very encouraging to them to see how special they were to God, and how Mighty a God they serve, having seen first hand his Power in delivering them.
It is a great contrast to the Egyptian’s beliefs. By the hand of God defeating and defying the Egyptian gods through the plagues, He was showing himself superior.
I want him to see the differences, and similarities. We need that ability to discern. And to see the subtlety in man’s reasoning as opposed to God’s.
Am I there yet? Not yet. If I knew it all, I wouldn’t be here with ya’ll, I’d be before my Saviour.
Praise God.
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