House of Light
• Apr. 14, 2007 - My little girl (turned into a birth story)
 Princess
Today I will write about our little princess. I wrote entries about both the boys and started this one but it never left the draft folder. I guess sometimes there is so much to say it just stays in a jumble until you can really sit and let it flow.
Princess a common blog name for little girls and in actuality my husband calls her the Viking Princess. That is more accurate in many ways but I didn't want to make it my title for her introduction.
My husband is of Norwegien descent and therefore the Viking reference. She is so very girly and princess-like and yet so rough and tumble right along with the boys. I'm glad for both sides of the equation. I am just asking the Lord for wisdom for how to teach her the correct timing for each:)
Viking Princess was born almost exactly 5 years ago. (Her birthday is just coming up at the end of the month) She was and is a precious gift from God that I wasn't sure was going to 'happen'. Hubby was pretty much content with the 2 boys and for 4 long years was unwilling to consider having another baby. There are two special 'babies' that helped change his heart, one was his sisters little girl and the other was a dear friend's son who was so adorable as a baby and so loveable. I could see whenever Hubby would hold these little ones something was softening in his heart.
Soon after he told me that he was ready to have our little girl. We 'tried' for 4months to get pregnant...I know that in actuality that is a such a short amount of time. But at the time it was forever. You have to understand, we conceived Monkey Boy 2 months after marriage (literally days after getting off the pill) and Action Boy was a surprise, conceived immediately after I was done nursing #1. So four months was like 4 years to my mind, not to mention it was time added onto the desire that I had already had for at least 3 years!
The pregnancy was soo different than with the boys. She was very active and constantly sitting low in my pelvis. It was uncomfortable to stand for long periods of time and I spent a LOT of the last few months in the tub. I taught the boys(5 & 7) how to do chores during this time (so glad I did) and created a regular bedtime, mealtime, etc in preparation for the baby's arrival. I spent a lot of time sitting and sewing (and watching TV) it was a very restful pregnancy. (with the boys I was active and feeling pretty normal and good till the last month or so)
I was planning on giving birth at home (like with the boys) and my plan was to have my Mom there and also 2 of my very close friends. My mom was on staff at YWAM Chico at the time so it was tricky making sure she could be here. I was having a lot of preliminary labor and one afternoon my contractions were coming about 5 minutes apart fairly regularly so Mom got her things together and began the drive (7hrs). I called my two friends and they came over to be with me. By evening everyone set up camp around the house to wait for hard labor and eventually fell asleep. Around midnight I began to realize that my fears were coming true. Labor was 'going away'. The contractions subsided and I lay there in my bed silently weeping, nothing was happening!
My friends went home the next day and promised to be back when the real thing happened. My mom was optimistic and figured the baby would come by the time the week was up and all was well. One day passed and then two. Still no labor. Always many contractions but nothing 'real'. By the end of the week I was so emotionally spent. I couldn't believe it, but the baby hadn't come and my mom's vacation time was up. She had to go and now there was no chance of her being here for the baby's birth because she had no more vacation time.
Real labor didn't happen until a full week later. (2 weeks after my false alarm) My dear friends (Mintflower is one of them;) were here with me in my home and my wonderful husband. My mom had also left behind my wonderful younger sister Leah who is a born doula (she was only 16 at the time) which was such a blessing. I realized that for me having my Mom there during my birth was actually causing me to have more faith in her presence than in God's. It really caused me to seek him harder and lean more heavily into his everlasting arms knowing that she wasn't going to be there.
Labor was very short, only about 3 hours from start to finish. My friends were wonderful. Mintflower was always encouraging me and giving me strength in her quiet way. At one point during labor my husband laid his hands on my belly and said a lovely prayer, welcoming our child into this family and out into the world. Only minutes later I went into transition and very shortly thereafter she was leaping out into the world. I say leaping because she actually pushed on the top of my uterus with her foot to help herself out on that last contraction. It was the weirdest sensation!! But she was anxious to meet her Daddy!!
Upon birth my gracious friend wrapped her immediately in a blanket with looking to see the gender. After all the sighs and oohs and ahhs while we took in the sight of this little person she said, "Well, do you want to know if it's a boy or a girl?"
It was the strangest thing...I hadn't even really thought about that yet:) She had just been laying there not crying at all. Just looking around at everyone...like she was greeting us all and saying to herself, "so these are the faces that go with those voices I know so well."
My lovely friend, opened up the blanket and we all saw that indeed we had been given a daughter. Oh what a blessed moment. My friend was beside herself with joy, having prayed for over a year for God to give me a little girl.
I will always have her image imprinted in my mind as I lay next to her that night trying to fall asleep. She was so tiny in her little layette and wrapped tightly like a baby burrito. (thanks to Mintflower, I had never heard of swaddling and Viking Princess really liked it) She wore her tiny little green and white striped hat (no pink yet;) and lay there sleeping soundly. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. Every few seconds I would open my eyes again and just peer over at her like perhaps it had all been a dream...But it wasn't. God is so good, he had given me the desire of my heart and here she was.
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• Feb. 2, 2007 - Meet my Firstborn
 This is my 'monkey' boy!Monkey boy is 12 years old. This year he will be a teenager, wow! I don't feel ready to officially have a teen! I just happened across an old journal this week that I had recorded all about my new marriage and pregnancy with my first baby. It felt so real as I was transported back in time, remembering all those emotions. The ancticipation, the fear of the unknown, the glorious joy and wonder of carrying life within my womb. I wish I could go back to the 'me' then and tell her, "Don't worry. Not one little bit. God has everything under control. Your son will grown strong and well."
Anyway, here he is, all grown up in so many ways, yet just beginning in others:)
Ever since he was just a little guy I knew that he had a love of all things beautiful. He always noticed little details, like if I had moved a picture on the wall he would comment on how nice it looked...at 3! He would compliment my friends on their hair or their clothes. Always the colorful or very feminine outfits. At 3 I let him take his birthday money to ToysRUs and buy whatever he wanted. He picked out an Ariel barbie doll. He loved that Ariel doll to death for the next 4 or 5 years. (we had to change out her body once or twice and she ended up with a screw in her arm after a terrible doll accident. lol) We actually still have her tucked away somewhere but boy is she in sorry shape.
All this doll loving was very hard for hubby to accept...but it's amazing how this personality of sensitivity and desire for dolls and dressing up has transferred into a very artistic, creative, sweet and endearing young man. He has many friends and a lot of them are girls! The girls are drawn to his kindness and understanding ear I think. Not to say he isn't silly and wild and rambunctious too at times;)
Here is Monkey-boy at 3:) Isn't he adorable?
I'm so glad we were able to let our son be who he was born to be and didn't try to make him "tough" or conform to some other idea of what a little boy should do or play with. I think this creative side also plays into his trouble with reading at first too. He just saw and sees the world through a completely different lense at times. And that's a good thing!
I love that he is growing into a wonderful young man. As hard as we try to plan and think everything out as young moms it seems I look back and feel thankful that God "has my back" and don't feel very gloating at all, just grateful. So grateful that in spite of all my shortcomings and mistakes God has plans for each of my little ones and will help me to accomplish all that is in HIS heart for me to do.
I love you monkey-boy and I am very, very proud of who you have become and all the progress you have made in your 12 years!
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• Jan. 29, 2007 - My Homeschooling Story - Part II
(For anyone who is reading this for the first time, the first installment can be found here; My Homeschooling Story - Part I.)
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My Turn to Homeschool
Having grown up in a homeschooling environment I figured that I too would homeschool. There really wasn't much thought about it. I was a little afraid because of the opposition my mom had faced, but I was determined to do so at whatever the cost. What I didn't know at the time of this inner preparation (the pregnancy of my firstborn son) was that the area I had moved to as a young married was, and is, very favorable toward homeschooling. Enough families like mine (my parents) had already paved the way for young beginning homeschoolers like me to have a lot of freedom and resources in this area.
BUT...I didn't know that at the time. So when I began homeschooling I did it like my mom; quietly, secretly, without much talk about it. Making sure I kept the kids in the house from 8am through 3pm to avoid any scrutiny. At least I did have a couple of friends who homeschooled which gave me an outlet my Mom never had, but I wasn't very open about it and didn't ask many questions. I just did it. I figured I 'should' know what I was doing and just grin and bear it. I was acting like a trailblazer when in reality I didn't have to be!
So, my early years were hard. I didn't have much knowledge about curriculums, how much to do, how little to do, details that would have really helped. I had no idea the wealth of information that was 'out there'. I didn't know where to look and just didn't know to look. In a nutshell I was floundering, wavering between modeling my school after public schools and wanting something different for my kids. I felt so pressured and so unorganized. Even when I was made aware of curriculums and magazines to help support me I had sort of a lone ranger attitude, like I needed to do this myself or not at all. (thank God he rooted that out!)
Then came my wake up call. At 8-yrs-old my son was still not reading. I had anticipated a lovely journey with my son, expecting he would learn much like I did and dive into the joyful experience of reading. When at 6 he seemed (to me) to balk at the idea of putting the sounds he had learned together to make words I just pushed a little harder. Then when I saw he was writing some letters backwards fairly consistenty I decided to back off a little and let his little brain develop the connection between right and left. ( I don't know if this is still considered accurate but that's what I learned in Child Develpment class in the early 90's) So I began to wait for him to show some readiness and give him some space.
When we picked back up again at 7 he was still struggling and becoming increasingly frustrated at the idea of trying to read. He would often just guess to try and appease me. I was completely stumped as to why he couldn't put sounds together when he clearly knew them on their own. When he started occasionally writing his name in perfect mirror image I began to think that there was something more going on. (duh?!?!)
One evening I was watching TV and there was an show on public broadcasting about dyslexia. They talked all about how children learn differently and how they were helping some children with severe dyslexia learn to read. Then, amazingly, within that same week there was a show on Oprah about the same thing. (Yes, God can use anything ) It was like a light bulb went off in my head! This is why ds is having such trouble. It's not just little kid stuff he has a whole different way of looking at things!
I began to read about dyslexia and order books about how to teach children with dyslexia. It broke me out of my whole mindset of being the lone ranger who had to try and figure everything out on my own. I knew I needed to ask for help. As I began to explore more kinesthetic ways of teaching ds his letters and sounds he began to unfold like the petals of a flower. I do think a lot of this had to do with my change of perspective too. I wasn't stressed about it anymore I knew we would just figure it out together.
By early 9 he was reading fairly well and now at 12 he loves to read**. He voluntarily read the entire Chronicles of Narnia series last summer. I would catch him up late into the night still reading when he was supposed to be sleeping. It was hard to get mad at him for that after all we had been through together:)
I guess the synopsis of my homeschooling journey thus far is that sometimes it's the troubles that get us up and out of our boxed in way of thinking. I am happy to use anything that will help my children learn best. Even if it is what some call, "canned curriculum". I am willing to recognize my limitations and use things that will balance out those areas of weakness. I'm happy to seek out different ways of doing things and to ask for help and ideas from others along the path. I don't ever want to be a lone ranger in this endeavor if I don't have to. That's what is so attractive to me about homeschool blogger...even if some of us never meet this side of heaven we can exchange our experiences and gain so much in the process.
**note--I don't believe that ds's dyslexia was very severe as it only delayed his reading by a few years but he doesn't struggle with it anymore. I don't know for sure as I never had him tested.
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----Dedicated to all those who have 'gone before' and blazed a trail for those of us following on this incredible journey called homeschooling. (Thanks, Mom.)
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• Jan. 25, 2007 - My Homeschooling Story
I have been homeschooling my 3 little lights since 'the beginning'. I have a 12yob, a 10yob and a 4yog. The large gap between the last two was while God was changing my husbands heart about having another baby
I decided to homeschool before my husband and I had children because I didn't figure there were any other options. I knew I didn't want to send them to public school, we couldn't afford private tuition and frankly I didn't want to miss one moment with them!
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My mom was my inspiration to homeschool. Even though I spent most of my education in public school (from here on referred to as PS) she did homeschool me until 4th grade. Then again in 8th grade when we moved too far out for the buses to come and pick me up:)
After I graduated from high school she took all of my siblings out of public school and homeschooled them. (of course some of them never went to PS at all since 4 of them weren't yet in school when I left home) There were 10 of us in all.
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When my mom first started homeschooling me and then my brother, she had to really fight the PS system in our tiny rural area. She got turned in to the superintendent of PS who made a visit to our home to make sure we weren't being abused or neglected. At that point she was told to put us in school. (this was when I was 9)
She prayed and prayed. What did God want her to do? She felt that he gave her the scripture: " Don't hide your light under a bushel" She felt that God was saying to comply with the law of man and don't be afraid, we would shine.
So she put me in school. I was in 4th grade and I really loved it. My personality was such that I wanted to please and loved getting stars and grades and such. All in all, I shone. (Not tooting my horn but attesting to my Mom's investment in me) One day I did come home upset because of getting a 'bad' grade. My mom asked what happened and told her that I didn't get the questions all right. She asked what the grade was and I told her, "an A-".
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Anyway...to sum up that portion of the story, the teachers and superintendent was very impressed with me, and later on my brother's, education, demeanor and poise. You have to understand that this was a very small town and school district and everyone knew everyone elses business. Even if mom had tried to 'fight' the system and keep us home it would have been very difficult to live and relate with others in such a tight-knit community. As it turns out God's direction was the best:)
As a result of putting us in school my mom gained favor in the community and with the PS system in general. Later when she did end up homeschooling the rest of my siblings she was treated with respect and allowed to do so without qualm or resistance.
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...to be continued...
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