Today I was driving on my way to a dentist appointment and I felt led to pray for my family (immediate and extended) and our country. I thought as I was driving..."how often do we listen to Christian radio, singing what are basically praise songs to our creator, yet we don't really contect with Him directly." In my early days as a Christian, I connected a lot, I felt driven to, yet it wasn't a deep connection, I don't think. As I walk with the Lord longer, I have the opportunity to really deepen that connection - to turn to Him for everything. Here I am...this woman of God...really a disappointment, to myself at least. But, isn't that the point? We fail. He picks us up. He picks up everyone who is willing to come to Him with a sincere heart. And, so, once more, I think I want to be like, what I heard (but still have not read for myself) the mother of John and Charles Wesley was like, constantly putting her prayer apron over her head and communing with a living God. Look at the fruit that act produced.
Regarding Susanna Wesley read this, taken from Wikipidia:
“Under no circumstances were the children permitted to have any lessons until they had reached their fifth year, but the day after their fifth birthday their formal education began. They attended classes for six hours and on the very first day they were supposed to learn the whole of the alphabet. All her children except two managed this feat, and these seemed to Susanna to be very backward.” (Haddal, 1961, pg.14) “The children got a good education. Daughters included, they all learnt Latin and Greek and were well tutored in the classical studies that were traditional in England at that time.” (Haddal, 1961, pg.15)
And from In Touch Ministries:
Shortly before she died at age seventy-three, Susanna wrote Charles to describe her faith. She admitted that for years she struggled with doubt and confusion about her salvation, but that she finally had complete peace.
"When I had forgotten God, yet I then found He had not forgotten me. Even then He did by His Spirit apply the merits of the great atonement to my soul, by telling me that Christ died for me."
I sometimes hear from others that they themselves don't do things in a prideful way. I hear that they aren't perfect and they don't pretend to be. Yet, I ask, really? Pride sneaks into everything we do as people.
On the other side of the coin, we see pride in others when it isn't really there. We are forever making comparisons and then saying that our comparison isn't prideful. Yet our statement "I don't make comparisons" often demonstrates our pride and brokenness in a more clear way than anything else could.
I love C.S. Lewis' thoughts on this topic. We have the book Mere Christianity on CD. I could listen to the reading of this book over and over. It is so profound. We are all so lost, apart from Jesus. We ought to have more patience for our fellow brothers and sisters, as well as for ourselves.
Romans 3:3,4"do not think of yourself more highly than you ought" is often misquoted. A more complete reading shows us:
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function.
So, I say it's OK to be "proud" about some things. Being proud is different than having pride. If one of my daughters is proud of themselves that they have learned to read a new and difficult level of reading, then I will not chastise her for being "proud" of herself. Yet, if that same girl shows disdain for her sister's reading level, then I will show her my disapproval of her attitude.
I say it's OK to be proud that you homeschool. It's OK to be grateful to God that he acted on your heart in order to provide that gift to you. Yet, realize, that God may not have given that grace or even that calling to your fellow brothers and sisters at this time.
It's OK to be proud of ways in which you are figuring out this homeschooling thing more. It's OK to be grateful that it is becoming easier.
It's OK to be proud of skills you are learning - whether it be singing, or painting, or conversing with others, or loving the little ones, or sewing, or gardening, or cooking, or Photoshop, or whatever. God put those on your heart. And, we all have different gifts. What we must remember is that God gave us all different gifts and just because I struggle in one area and find another area easy, doesn't mean that I am of any less of a value. Whether you are an apostle, a world evangelist, a prayer warrior, or a waiter of tables, you are valued in the body of Christ.
Yet, we can also learn from others and be continually prodded on to do good works for Christ, to the measure that Christ has given us that gift. If I love to make homemade soup, I hope you don't feel bad about yourself if you prefer to buy store bought soup. On the same token, don't rule out the possibility that one day you may feel pressed to make homemade soup in order to save money, or to enjoy the process of making something homemade, or in order to make a more healthful product for your family. And, do not limit my excitement when I tell you how neat it is for me to make homemade soup. My example may be corny. Perhaps it is not the best example. But, let's have grace for one another and be "proud" of one another for our accomplishments.
This week's Homeschool Blogger Friend School Assignment has to do with what we would wish we would have done or what we would do if we knew we were going to see the Lord today.
I had to think about this one. I am very pleased with a lot of the choices my husband and I have made with regards to our lives and our kids lives. And, I have always been one of those to feel like I want to see my Lord. I want to experience the wholeness that comes with being with Him, without sin and sin's consequences we face on this earth.
However, my first thought about this topic, was an ironic one I thought. I would wish that I had known the Lord better in my time here on Earth. I wish I had fellowshipped more with the Father. I wish that I had drawn more from His resources, from the Comforter. It is ironic I think, because then I will see Him face to face. Yet, I wish to know Him more in the here and now.
A couple of other thoughts I had center around my family. I would like to, even more than we do, draw close together as a family. I would like to not allow the busyness or worries of the world to come between myself and my family. I would like to take advantage of every sunny day (or just not a rainy day) and spend it outside with them, as much as is possible.
I'd also like it if I made it a priority to get more special time with my husband, even if it's just a weekend here and there. Those times we have done that have been so special. It is hard to get away from the girls, and to trust them to others. But, it is my opinion that it is a really special and necessary thing to do. Having had a baby about a year ago, this isn't something my husband and I have done in the last year. If I knew I wouldn't get another chance, I think that is something I would regret, if I didn't figure out a way to do this.
The last thing I thought about when it comes to regrets, is that I would regret beating myself up for being me. I am serious, yet I have a sense of humor. Sometimes my thoughts get cluttered and it's hard to talk with others. Sometimes I am quiet. I like traditional things. I'm not the kind of person to appeal to a person and see an immediate change in their opinion. In terms of sharing the gospel, I would say I am not a "reaper". So, I would like to seek ways for the Lord to use me the way I am and in the circumstance I am in. I think a lot of this, comes down to worshipping the Father in prayer, with song, with my life, and thanking Him for who he created me to be. Then through that time that I spend with him in prayer, He will direct me, and it is my prayer, that I will be obedient to His direction.
Here is my verse for the week:
Matthew 6:6
But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
Yesterday, my Natalie was sick. She woke up feeling sick and threw up several times after that. I was mentioning to my husband that evening that it was weird, Natalie was sick from like 8:00 to 2:00 and then about 3:00 she was just totally better. Then, I remembered. At about 2:00 Natalie asked me to pray for her and I did. I said to my husband, "it must have been faith like a mustard seed, because I didn't feel that confident." I think that God wanted to encourage me in my prayer life. That it makes a difference, that He hears, that He will grow my faith.
So, don't be discouraged from praying. Pray and believe. God hears your prayers. And He is faithful and good. And, pray for our nation, pray for our world, pray for a generation who needs to come into contact with the Living God.
My dh and I are reading the book With Christ In The School Of Prayer, by Andrew Murray. Actually, the book we own is called Andrew Murray on Prayer which is a collection of smaller books by Andrew Murray. Andrew Murray was a preacher in South Africa in the late 1800's and early 1900's. He wrote series of small books divided into 30 sections. They were paperback pocket books intended for rural Christians who would rarely be able to make it to a service. An old pastor of mine, whose prayer life I respected, recommend this smaller book we are reading in a sermon once. I am excited to read the book.
Reading his book, makes me interested in more specific World History. The way we hear it today we'd think South Africa is solely a racist state, at least in its old form. I suspect there is more to the story, as there usually is. Look how the news is reported now. There is good and there is bad in every society. We are a fallen people after all.
Anyhow...here is a little synopsis of the 1st chapter of With Christ In The School Of Prayer:
Jesus prayed like no other. His disciples saw this and naturally asked Jesus to teach them how to pray. The disciples had power in prayer unlike the power we typically see today. Jesus had taught them how to pray. We have Jesus in us and He will teach us how to pray too, from His Word and from His Spirit. Like anything you are learning to do, prayer takes practice. Jesus never taught the disciples how to preach, only how to pray. Relationship with God equals answers for people. We should not seek to please people, but God.
I found a great website. Really...I've been feeling like...I just love hymns. I love the richness of the words. I love the scriptural accuracy of hymns. I love the worship of hymns. So many praise and worship songs are really just popular Christian songs. They aren't bad or anything, and certainly I will continue to listen to popular Christian music, but the songs are more singing about someone's experience with Christianity, rather than worshipping the Living God or singing scripture.
Yet, I like modern beats and a modern format. Modern, yet understandable so that the hymn can really move my soul.
Anyhow, this website (as other websites do as well) tries to address this and provide traditional hymns which are updated just a little. Check it out:
I homeschool my three sweet daughters on our little farm, plus live along side my sweet step-daughter, my husband, our cat, our dog, some cows, and some chickens... God has done a work in me bringing my heart closer and closer to my family. And I feel so blessed.
