May. 16, 2009
Blessings In A Grounding
A few weeks ago, I was grounded for neglecting school work, and chatting...when my mom thought I was working. I felt awful for that after I saw how upset she was, but I think things are better now and I know God has forgiven me. I'm slowly edging towards getting caught up, and school seems to be on my side at this point. So.... Praise God!!! 
When I say this, most people would think I've got something seriously wrong with me, but in all honesty this has been an incredible grounding. The only EXTREMELY SUCKY part is that I've been grounded from speaking with three of my bestest friends, which sucks SOOOO bad and I miss them terribly. But God is teaching me SO much!
For the first few days of being grounded, I was seriously SO upset. It wasn't even that I was grounded, it was that I couldn't talk to my closest friends. I cried more in those few days than I've cried in AGES, and I was missing them so much I actually felt sick for a while. Some people would see that as being ridiculous and overly dramatic, but because i love them so much and think of them as my siblings I think it's understandable. :S I hope anyways..... Over that week, it was also my birthday, and my really close friends - Lukey, Jesse, and Sary - and I were supposed to hang out on the Friday. Many of us had been anticipating this day for a long time. That was REALLY hard. I kept hoping and praying that God would allow the rest of them and I to be able to hang out after all. However, God said 'not yet'. I accepted that, but I was still really sad about it. Then the day after my birthday my brothers, Lukey and Jesse, called me to wish me a belated happy birthday. I was seriously SOOO excited! I was smiling more than I had in days, and my mom couldn't help but be happy for me. :P That made my week, and that plus the fact that it was a gorgeous day made that day incredible!
Every now and then, after that, I keep/kept having moments were I REALLY missed my brothers and sister. Then, the following week I received in the mail letters from Lukey and Sary. I was seriously SO mega excited, and I was beaming with joy! And, Jesse sent me a couple of things over the internet. Those totally made my week!
Then a few days after, I was going through one of my continuous fazes where I miss Lukey, Jesse, and Sary SO much, and I had to go in an online meeting with my school, and Sary and Lukey were there. I was SO glad to finally be able to "see" them again, but unfortunately I wasn't able to talk to them. Eventually, though, our teacher decided to put us in to groups, and incredibly enough he put Sary and I in the same group. We were required to talk and Sary and I were SO excited, and talked for a few minutes. I was SO excited!!!
From those few things that happened over those several days, God really showed me that he cares and that he pays attention to us and what we are feeling. He knew when I was nearly ready to give up, or when I was missing my siblings/friends. And he gave me those few moments with them to keep me going. God is SO great!
I've also been feeling really afraid lately. As much as I love and trust Lukey, Jesse, and Sary, I was afraid of what would happen when I was eventually allowed to talk to them again. I had questions running through my mind, such as 'how will they react when I can talk to them again?', 'Will they be mad? Happy? upset i didn't tell them i was behind?'. I wasn't and still am not sure, but as time went on and these thoughts kept growing in my mind, and the fear that they'd be really annoyed with me continued to grow in me as well. Then, God decided to interviene. He brought back all these lines from things they'd told me. My oldest brother he told me at one point to "...have faith in yourself, in your friends, and more importantly God." I took that statement for granted at one point, but as I haven't been able to talk with him in a while, I've had time to think about this and I realize that I need to have more faith in my friends. Then there other things they've quoted such as "friends are friends forever, if the Lord's the lord of them, and a friend will not say never, cause the welcome will not end..." ~ Michael W. Smith; "..and in this marriage of our hearts, there is no death do us part, for you are eternal, and I am eternally yours. I could never lose your love to sickness, I could never lose you to divorce, and there's no concept of abandoment for I am safe within your arms..." ~ Sanctus Real; "Hold fast to God" ~ my other big brother; and "A friend loves at all times...." in Psalms 17, in addition to SO many others. All of these, God has brought back to mind, and I'm ashamed to realize that I've been doubting in my friendships with my three of bestest friends. But, I've realized now how stupid I was. I still haven't had a chance to talk to them, but I know full well that they will be there when I get back. And that no matter what we'll be friends for a long time. I'm always telling them they don't need to be afraid of me judging them and that our friendships are built on the solid foundation of God, so they don't need to be afraid to tell me things cause I won't be shaken and neither will our friendship. Then one of my brothers quoted me on that, and I've been learning that more and more. God's got his enormous loving arms wrapped around Lukey, Jesse, Sary, and my friendship and he's helping us to stay together. If it weren't for him we wouldn't even be this close or know each other.
Basically, God has shown me that they are true friends who I won't lose easily. He also is protecting our friendship, and he's shown me and told me that they'll be there when my grounding is finished. They are all incredible people!! :D
Then another cool thing that happened, occured last Sunday. I'm getting baptized soon, so I was having a meeting with an elder, just to discuss my beliefs, why i was getting baptized, etc. (my church requires it). The elder I had was SUPER nice and we had a fantastic discussion about faith. Towards the end, he asked if he could pray for me, and I was all for it. I was a bit uncertain, though, cause as he was praying he kept pausing. I thought it was because he was listening to God, but I wasn't sure. Then God gave him a picture. The elder, he said he saw a picture of me kneeling before God. I wasn't just kneeling for myself, but for others. And God told him that I want to help people. Then the elder who I had, continued to pray and prayed that I would fall to my knees in front of God for SO many people/things as my life continues. It was SO incredible, and I was truly amazed by it for days!
So many people would be down about being grounded, and as sucky as it is, I'm sorta glad that I am. I've missed Lukey, Jesse, and Sary SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXTREMELY much, but I've also learned a lot. And, I've realized how strong our friendship is. I know to others this would seem a small thing, but I know I've got them as friends for a long time. So..... THANK YOU JESUS!! :D
The verse that I think best suits all that I've been going through and learning is Psalm 139 " 1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. 7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.17 How precious to [b] me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men! 20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you? 22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies.23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."
And, even if I don't know you I love you all as my siblings in Christ, and you've got me and Jesus! And, if anyone has prayer requests, feel free to drop me a comment. I'd be happy to pray for you! :)
God bless,
Sarah
When I say this, most people would think I've got something seriously wrong with me, but in all honesty this has been an incredible grounding. The only EXTREMELY SUCKY part is that I've been grounded from speaking with three of my bestest friends, which sucks SOOOO bad and I miss them terribly. But God is teaching me SO much!
For the first few days of being grounded, I was seriously SO upset. It wasn't even that I was grounded, it was that I couldn't talk to my closest friends. I cried more in those few days than I've cried in AGES, and I was missing them so much I actually felt sick for a while. Some people would see that as being ridiculous and overly dramatic, but because i love them so much and think of them as my siblings I think it's understandable. :S I hope anyways..... Over that week, it was also my birthday, and my really close friends - Lukey, Jesse, and Sary - and I were supposed to hang out on the Friday. Many of us had been anticipating this day for a long time. That was REALLY hard. I kept hoping and praying that God would allow the rest of them and I to be able to hang out after all. However, God said 'not yet'. I accepted that, but I was still really sad about it. Then the day after my birthday my brothers, Lukey and Jesse, called me to wish me a belated happy birthday. I was seriously SOOO excited! I was smiling more than I had in days, and my mom couldn't help but be happy for me. :P That made my week, and that plus the fact that it was a gorgeous day made that day incredible!
Every now and then, after that, I keep/kept having moments were I REALLY missed my brothers and sister. Then, the following week I received in the mail letters from Lukey and Sary. I was seriously SO mega excited, and I was beaming with joy! And, Jesse sent me a couple of things over the internet. Those totally made my week!
Then a few days after, I was going through one of my continuous fazes where I miss Lukey, Jesse, and Sary SO much, and I had to go in an online meeting with my school, and Sary and Lukey were there. I was SO glad to finally be able to "see" them again, but unfortunately I wasn't able to talk to them. Eventually, though, our teacher decided to put us in to groups, and incredibly enough he put Sary and I in the same group. We were required to talk and Sary and I were SO excited, and talked for a few minutes. I was SO excited!!!
From those few things that happened over those several days, God really showed me that he cares and that he pays attention to us and what we are feeling. He knew when I was nearly ready to give up, or when I was missing my siblings/friends. And he gave me those few moments with them to keep me going. God is SO great!
I've also been feeling really afraid lately. As much as I love and trust Lukey, Jesse, and Sary, I was afraid of what would happen when I was eventually allowed to talk to them again. I had questions running through my mind, such as 'how will they react when I can talk to them again?', 'Will they be mad? Happy? upset i didn't tell them i was behind?'. I wasn't and still am not sure, but as time went on and these thoughts kept growing in my mind, and the fear that they'd be really annoyed with me continued to grow in me as well. Then, God decided to interviene. He brought back all these lines from things they'd told me. My oldest brother he told me at one point to "...have faith in yourself, in your friends, and more importantly God." I took that statement for granted at one point, but as I haven't been able to talk with him in a while, I've had time to think about this and I realize that I need to have more faith in my friends. Then there other things they've quoted such as "friends are friends forever, if the Lord's the lord of them, and a friend will not say never, cause the welcome will not end..." ~ Michael W. Smith; "..and in this marriage of our hearts, there is no death do us part, for you are eternal, and I am eternally yours. I could never lose your love to sickness, I could never lose you to divorce, and there's no concept of abandoment for I am safe within your arms..." ~ Sanctus Real; "Hold fast to God" ~ my other big brother; and "A friend loves at all times...." in Psalms 17, in addition to SO many others. All of these, God has brought back to mind, and I'm ashamed to realize that I've been doubting in my friendships with my three of bestest friends. But, I've realized now how stupid I was. I still haven't had a chance to talk to them, but I know full well that they will be there when I get back. And that no matter what we'll be friends for a long time. I'm always telling them they don't need to be afraid of me judging them and that our friendships are built on the solid foundation of God, so they don't need to be afraid to tell me things cause I won't be shaken and neither will our friendship. Then one of my brothers quoted me on that, and I've been learning that more and more. God's got his enormous loving arms wrapped around Lukey, Jesse, Sary, and my friendship and he's helping us to stay together. If it weren't for him we wouldn't even be this close or know each other.
Basically, God has shown me that they are true friends who I won't lose easily. He also is protecting our friendship, and he's shown me and told me that they'll be there when my grounding is finished. They are all incredible people!! :D
Then another cool thing that happened, occured last Sunday. I'm getting baptized soon, so I was having a meeting with an elder, just to discuss my beliefs, why i was getting baptized, etc. (my church requires it). The elder I had was SUPER nice and we had a fantastic discussion about faith. Towards the end, he asked if he could pray for me, and I was all for it. I was a bit uncertain, though, cause as he was praying he kept pausing. I thought it was because he was listening to God, but I wasn't sure. Then God gave him a picture. The elder, he said he saw a picture of me kneeling before God. I wasn't just kneeling for myself, but for others. And God told him that I want to help people. Then the elder who I had, continued to pray and prayed that I would fall to my knees in front of God for SO many people/things as my life continues. It was SO incredible, and I was truly amazed by it for days!
So many people would be down about being grounded, and as sucky as it is, I'm sorta glad that I am. I've missed Lukey, Jesse, and Sary SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXTREMELY much, but I've also learned a lot. And, I've realized how strong our friendship is. I know to others this would seem a small thing, but I know I've got them as friends for a long time. So..... THANK YOU JESUS!! :D
The verse that I think best suits all that I've been going through and learning is Psalm 139 " 1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. 7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.17 How precious to [b] me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men! 20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you? 22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies.23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."
And, even if I don't know you I love you all as my siblings in Christ, and you've got me and Jesus! And, if anyone has prayer requests, feel free to drop me a comment. I'd be happy to pray for you! :)
God bless,
Sarah