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Boys 'R' Us

Apr. 8, 2008

Speaking Caveman

Posted in Life with boys

Living with all men can be challenging.
Communication is one of the most difficult challenges that men and women face and my "little men" that I am raising are no different. Communicating with them can sometimes drive me crazy! Normally, I try to speak with good grammar, season it with interesting vocabulary and even use complete sentences - but to no avail. I have listened to all the expert advice:
Never speak to you children in baby talk - ok, got it.
Use good grammar and add variety to your vocabulary - ok, got it.
Read lots of good literature so they can pick up on speaking well - ok, check.
Answer their questions with complete sentence answers, not just yes or no - ok, got it.
These experts should come live with me for a while! While all this is good advice, my boys just don't appreciate numerous words - no matter how good they sound.
In an effort to communicate in a way that gets their attention I often find myself resorting to what I call speaking "caveman".
Here's an example of how caveman speak works in my home:
Mom: "Could you please go pick up the mail from the mail box and bring it in the kitchen?"
Caveboy: "HUH?"
Mom: "Could you please go get the mail?"
Caveboy: "Where's the mail?? Is that what you said?"
Now, I don't know if their mind is just wandering when I am speaking or if they have the hearing of a rock band roadie but at this point I get so frustrated that my communication ends up being grunted one syllable words.
Mom: MAIL - GET - BRING - UG!
Suddenly the light comes on . . .
Caveboy: "Oh, OK!"
And they are off - happily completing the task.
You can frequently hear me saying:
GO - ROOM - CLEAN
or
WIPE - FEET - UG!
Somehow, they perfectly understand these grunted commands!
I always pound my chest and shout UG! or grunt or snort - they love this !
Caveman has become our unique family language and we all crack up everytime one of us ends up speaking caveman.
And just like those experts - I have my own advice for speaking this male language.
Like any good language, there are rules to speaking caveman. To ensure this language is used properly (and in an effort to educate their future wives) I will share with you the 3 most important rules to speaking caveman:
1.) Never speak in full sentences - keep it short and to the point
2.) Only use 1 syllable words when possible
3.) Always grunt or snort and laugh after you speak
I truly do enjoy our differences and even when it appears these cave boys will never learn proper english, they always surprise me. In fact, as I am writing this, one of my caveboys just used the word "redundant" - in a complete sentence even! I am so proud of him!

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Comments

Apr. 9, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by 3rsandahug

Oh, I'll have to try that with my son! It seems that everything I say to him is met with the response, "What?" Usually if I say nothing for a second, he says, "Oh" or "OK," but sometimes he just doesn't get it.
Need Speak Cave Talk
:-)
Karen