Most people think that by having four children I am all four of the following:

A. Very relaxed

B. Insane

C. A saint (they MEAN insane, but they SAY "You must be a saint")

D. I must have my hands full

Before I comment on that, you have to know that I don't think four children is a large family. Now, I admit that we have tied the largest family at both the fire department and our church. People do frequently comment on our family size (see A,B,C & D). But, of my four sisters-in-law, one has nine children and another seven. A number of our friends have a number of children (5-10 ... and I don't mean their ages). So, I don't really consider myself to have a large family.

Now let's talk about A - how relaxed I am. I have found that there are people who assume that I permit my new babies to eat dirt & sugar, watch tv and rarely read them a book. These latter children will all work at McDonalds (we all know what their IQ will be, right?) and will grow up in rags if they don't drown in childhood. {By the way, my ob is the youngest of eight. According to the studies, she should be on the street rather than one of the most popular ob's in town.}

What people don't know is that the more children I have had, the more precious each one has been to me in a way I can't describe. They aren't "one in a crowd" - they are an adorable individual that melts my very heart. Take little Si, for instance. Yes, he's our fourth boy. But boys aren't old hat to me merely because I've seen three. Will I be surprised when he shoots me with his banana? No. But his little self that blows out his lips in a crooked fashion, his four-tooth-grin, his hugs and slobbery kisses, his fears and happinesses are all new to me. Because he is new to me. He isn't just part of the pack. He is Silas. And I know how quickly he will be a toddler, then a preschooler and then married, because even though my oldest is only 8 - that is something I do have ... perspective. When a new baby comes home, I know just how long that "fresh from water" baby skin will last. So, I am not relaxed. I am vigilant to know, absorb and love my babies. I work very hard to parent and I don't see my littles as being disposable or unimportant merely because I have others.

For the record, my babies cannot:

~ watch tv for the first two years (except on accident)

~ eat sugar for one full year (barring what their big brothers feed them on the sly)

~ crawl through the house without being surrounded by books. A benefit to having three big brothers and two parents is that you get MORE books read to you than any previous babe.

They do eat dirt. Just so you know, I have always been "relaxed" ... the first three ate dirt, too.