May. 26, 2009
Sibling Rivalry! AAAAAAGH!
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Okay, so I am the mom that had a pretty peaceful life until I made the decision 4 years ago to enroll my children in public school after homeschooling for 3 years. At that time my children were ages 9, 8, and 6 year old twins. Now at 13, 12, and 10, I have decided to bring them home - well, at least the younger 3. We are still debating on what to do about the 13 year old. My husband is unsure about me homeschooling again because he knows that the kids know how to "push my buttons" and get their way. He is afraid that they won't do their work as they are asked. I will admit, they know how to wear me down. I am planning to spend my summer working on this, but honestly, I am getting REALLY nervous about having them home again. The last few weeks I have really been trying to watch how they interact and how I handle situations. My husband is right...I let them wear me down. After doing that for 4 years, it's going to be a tough habit to break. Also, they all argue it seems like all the time. I can handle most of that, but 2 of them are at it ALL THE TIME! It gets to the point that any time they are in the same room, there is sure to be a fight. My ten year old son is as big as my 12 year old son, and I think it bothers my 12 year old who is small for his age. He is super sensitive and also has the problem that he cannot accept defeat in anything (board games, card games, sports)- someone's always cheating or not playing fair. He gets so upset that he literally cries and yells and stomps off to his room. Then you have my 10 year old son who cannot accept defeat, either, and EVERYTHING is always someone else's fault. (He once told me that it was my fault that he spent all of his birthday money on video games that no longer work because I didn't tell him that he had enough money for the Nintendo DS! I didn't realize it was my job to check prices on everything in the store). These two are at each others' throats all the time! My oldest son doesn't really want to be homeschooled, and I honestly think that the fighting between the siblings is a big factor in that decision. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with the behavior problems? I am planning to spend my summer working on these. I am hoping that not being at school all day will help some also. Will peace ever be restored to my home? I am feeling a little overwhelmed right now, and am praying that God bring some peace to my home. I feel so badly because I am afraid I am going to want to "throw in the towel" after 2 weeks of being home with them all day. I never used to feel this way, but since I went to work and the kids went to school, I find that I don't have the patience I once had! Thanks for letting me share my frustrations and concerns! |
Mar. 31, 2009
Can't wait for next year!
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After much debating (with myself) and praying, I have realized that God is gently prodding me in the direction of homeschooling. It is amazing to me how He works sometimes. I always want the big writing in the sky to tell me what to do, but most of the time I just have to listen to that still, small voice to guide me. I plan to let my children finish this school year at public school. This will allow time for me to gather my materials and be more prepared for next year. I think it will boost my confidence tremendously if I feel that I am ready. I am not exactly sure which curriculum I would like to use...I would like to find one curriculum for math, english and maybe science, and unit studies for social studies in which all four of my children can participate. I have not told anyone (in-laws, school, certain friends, etc) about our decision. I guess I just don't want to hear about all the reasons not to do it for a while. Bottom line is that this is our decision...it is not up for vote. I am most certain that I will face much criticism, but it won't be anything I haven't experienced before. I will have a few months to pray about it and build my confidence before anyone has to know. Right now I am turning my attention to putting together a curriculum. Any veteran homeschoolers have ideas for math, science and English curriculum? |
Mar. 27, 2009
To homeschool or not to homeschool? Advice?
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I am very new to this site, this is only my second post. My first entry was VERY long, but I received no comments. I am still trying to find my way around the website, so I am not sure I did it correctly. I'm going to try to give a condensed version this time. I homeschooled for 3 years before deciding to enroll my children in public school. I thought they all wanted to go, and I got a full-time job. I was completely burned out and there were no local support groups at the time. They have had a few good things come from public school. While I don't think they need to sit at the table for 8 hours a day, I do see now that they needed more structure than I was giving them. Three of my four children beg me to homeschool them now, but my oldest (7th grade) is really unsure about all of it. He is "established" in his school and doesn't want to lose all of his friends or miss out on all the fun stuff they do. However, he also doesn't want to be exposed to all of the stuff that he knows is not appropriate for his age...I was appalled when he told me what was going on there. I guess my question is, should I homeschool the other 3 and not him, or should I homeschool him as well even if he truly does not want to. He is not one that will refuse to do the work...he is a great kid and will do whatever I ask of him. I just don't want him to be unhappy. I feel more capable of homeschooling now, and I have discovered several support groups, co-ops, and athletic programs for the kids. I am just unsure what I should do. Any advice is truly appreciated. Thanks! |
Mar. 26, 2009
Any advice?
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I am a mother of 3 boys and one girl ages 12, 11, and 9 year old twins. We began homeschooling when my oldest started 1st grade. We homeschooled for 3 years, then enrolled them in public school. I thought I needed to get a job, my oldest didn't feel like he really had any friends, and I was completely burned out. I didn't know many people in my area that homeschooled at the time, and the ones that did were quite a bit younger than my oldest child. I thought all of my kids wanted to go to school, but when it came right down to it, nobody really wanted to go. However, I had already started a job at the high school and thought it was the best thing to do. The first few months were REALLY tough, but we managed to get through them. Every time I would second-guess my decision, I had plenty of people around me say that this was really the best thing for everyone. There have been many ups and downs along the way, but I had convinced myself that this is what I needed to do. Now, three years later, I am regretting my decision to re-enroll them in public school. Three of my children want to be homeschooled very badly, but my oldest is now in 7th grade and wants to be around his friends at school. He has confided in me some things that go on there - boys exposing themselves to girls; two 7th grade girls are pregnant; perverse conversations, etc. He is not comfortable with these things, and gets ridiculed by some of the boys because he is so naive and doesn't know much of the perverse terminology used on a daily basis. However, for the most part, he still wants to go to school. He has a few "good" friends that I feel can be trusted, but I am appalled by the things that are going on. He has expressed very little interest in being homeschooled. He will occasionally mention things that he would like about it, but still doesn't seem to have a real desire to do it. I am torn between allowing him to continue there and homeschooling the other 3, or homeschooling all of them, or homeschooling none of them. I trust my son's judgement and I trust he will make the "right" decisions concerning behavior and attitude at school. However, I know how hard it is to do the right thing, and worry about him being constantly exposed to these things. He has also mentioned that he sometimes dreads going to school and having to listen to the talk and see the behavior he sees. Yet, even after that, he still wants to be there. I don't understand it myself, but as long as he wants to be there, I feel like he will think his feelings don't matter to me if we force him to withdraw from school. I feel like his innocence has already been robbed, and I regret ever sending them back to school. I honestly don't know how much I will help him if I take him back out at this point. I plan to get involved with a support group/co-op in a nearby town if I do homeschool, but that doesn't even seem to interest him. I haven't just flat out asked him what he thinks about coming home, but I will mention homeschooling next year, and he will say, "I kinda want to go to school." He will do anything that I ask, but I don't want to ask him to give up something if he truly loves it and he continues to make good decisions. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated. I think what scares me more than anything is the fact that my daughter will be exposed to some of these things at such a young age. I just want them to retain their innocence as long as possible. 12 years old is such a young age to be exposed to these things. Thanks in advance! |