Aug. 29, 2008 - At The Well: Welcoming Daddy Home
* How can we lay a welcome mat of love for our husbands after a long day of hard work?
* How can we make our homes inviting places where Daddy longs to be at the end of a long day?
* How can we involve our children in this process and teach them to show reverence to their Daddy?
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This is a GREAT topic and one that I have been considering and trying to work towards.
My husband really needs to know that I'm thinking of him and considering him as I go about my day. I have been pleasantly pleased with how such a small act on my part means a great deal to him and really changes his outlook.
Before I tackle the questions above, welcoming my husband home really starts the night before. He is a diabetic and needs to eat regularly, yet often gets too busy at work to stop and eat, or he simply chooses what is nearest - and usually the least healthful for him; so before getting in bed I put together a lunch for him. A good protein, fresh veggies, a whole grain, some fruit to snack on and a bottle or two of his no-calorie drinks which go in the freezer for the night. I put his lunch bag on the table so that he remembers to get his lunch out of the refrigerator** - he's forgotten several times. This one small act not only provides for him physically, it also builds him up emotionally since it is a tangible reminder that someone (me) cares for him! **NOTE: I am not up in the morning to put his lunch in his tote bag, but rising early is one of my goals. One step at a time!
How can I lay a welcome mat of love for my husband after a long day of hard work?
One of the first things I do, if I'm able, is to give him a call in the early afternoon and see how his day is going, what he's done, what he has left to do, what time he might be home (his job right now is variable and he may have early meetings or late appointments), and just chat about what we've done so far at home. This, again, is something very simple for me to do but means a lot to him.
When he's on his way home (or supposed to be) I try giving him a call, to see if he's coming home/when he'll be home, to help keep him awake on his long drive, and so that I know how long we have - how much we need to do - what time I should have dinner ready, etc. Sometimes I'll find something to do in the front yard like watering, weeding, or cleaning out the car so that I can be outside when his truck comes around the corner. Sometimes I send the children outside to play, or they will set up a watch at the front window so that as soon as his truck comes into view, the alarm is given and everyone rushes outside to greet him. We don't always do this because sometimes he sneaks home without giving us any warming and sometimes he is in the middle of a phone call and we need to be quiet until he finishes.
The best way to lay the welcome mat for my husband is to be attentive to his desires throughout my day, completing any special requests he's made, and think of what he would like. Mainly, just considering him.
Consider: 1: to think about carefully: as a: to think of especially with regard to taking some action
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous. 1 Peter 3:8
How can we make our homes inviting places where Daddy longs to be at the end of a long day?
This is easy to say and harder to do. To make our home an inviting place that Daddy longs to come to things need to be orderly -- this is a hard one because both Husband and I are pack rats who keep everything; but this summer I've been going through the house and getting rid of those areas and places that attract the most clutter. This has helped tremendously. A surface pick-up is okay for the house in general, but a neat bedroom and clean bathroom mean a lot to him. Another plus is if he knows dinner is ready or will be ready soon. Smelling dinner in the oven or crockpot, fresh bread from the bread machine, seeing the table set, these are all good things that help him to know his needs are being considered. He usually eats lunch early and so needs to eat dinner very soon after coming home.
Another thing that is easy to say and harder to do is watching my attitude. This is an area where with the wrong look or thoughtless word or tone of voice I can convey an attitude of disdain or disrespect that will immediately erase any joy Husband feels in being home. Here is why it is SO important to be in the Word early and often throughout the day; to hide the Word in my heart; to memorize and sing to myself - and sometimes out loud! - wonderful, faith-building hymns; to pray for my husband during the day whenever he comes to my mind. All of this helps to counteract the sin and selfishness that I can be quickly sidetracked by. And when I am tempted to think those selfish thoughts or the worldly thoughts about "fairness" and "deserve" "how come" and "why doesn't" then I remember:
Ephesians 6, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."
and 1 Peter 5, "Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour."
and Romans 3, "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one."
How can I involve my children in this process and teach them to show reverence to their Daddy?
Again, the first and most important thing is my attitude. Am I excited and anticipating Husband coming home, or do I see his homecoming as in interruption of MY plans? We've all been hurt more than once by this attitude.
So, I need to look forward to, anticipate with pleasure, Husband coming home! The children will then naturally pick up on this and will 'catch it'!!
They will help me with dinner preparations and every once in a while, if our dinner is simple, they will take over preparations themselves and then can tell Daddy with pride that they made dinner themselves! He loves that and always says, "So that's why it tastes so good!"
We do a general pick up - a 10 minute tidy, if you will - and at times I'll have the children go change clothes, wash hands and faces, or even shower depending on what kind of day we've been having. Sometimes I like to sit down and we'll read the Bible for a bit before he comes home. This serves two purposes: to help focus my mind on those things that are true and pure and just, and if we've had a busy day, it helps to get everyone calm and quieted so that Daddy comes home to peace and joy instead of CHAOS!!
To see what others do to Welcome Daddy Home, visit HERE
At The Well originates at Joyfully Living
