Feb. 9, 2010

Schedules and Chores with Small Children - Is More of a Schedule Needed?

Q. I'm wondering if you might have any words of wisdom for a mom whose children are all still pretty little. I have a five year old, a three year old, and a one year old. They do have some age appropriate chores, but I really feel like we need more of a schedule.


A. Let your children see you expect great things from them, but do not expect or require that it be done the way that you would do them. Let them attempt to help with larger chores and daily household tasks. Praise them for what they CAN do well. Ignore all else, as far as mistakes go, for the time being. Refrain from discouraging their successes!

As far as schedue, I would advise largely against it with only younger children. Keep a GENERAL schedule (nap times, clean up/chore times, and such as that), but don't schedule every minute at this age. Just ENJOY them!

If you feel as though there is too much down time during the day, make a box of index cards with things to do listed on each card. These activities might include: Scripture Memory, song time, a time to make gifts/cards for relatives or the elderly, time to bake cookies for friends/neighbors, extra or seasonal chores, etc. ALL of these are GREAT things to do, but be sure not to overschedule and to have some down time or free time, as well. :)

~ Lisa


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Feb. 8, 2010

God...who are you? Why my belief in who God is means I can still let God plan our family after a near-death experience

Posted in Quiverfull

Photobucket

Join us in this great Bible study At The Well!


DISCUSSION QUESTION FOR TODAY...


Who is God to You?


Since my life-changing loss of my 7th miscarried child accompanied with my own near-death experience when losing our little 4 month old (preborn) Levi Samuel (more here) most might think that I would be angry at God for taking him away so soon or that I might even reconsider my beliefs that God should have complete control of my womb. It is BECAUSE of our belief of Who God is that Mark and I both hold fast to our beliefs about family planning. God has numbered each of our days (including mine and Levi's) and He would not create a child in my womb that was to cause my death without His foreknowledge and planning! God would not create a soul that we "should have prevented," just to take my life away to prove to the rest of the world that He needs our help in family planning. The fact is that He needs no one's assistance in the creation or prevention of life. The Creator can handle it all without our finite wisdom and help. He does not need our assistance in family planning in the least. Why do we worry so? Because...we are human.


My view of God is a view that He is all-powerful and all knowing. He is our protector; our shield. He is our comforter. He loves us with a love unspeakable. He holds us all in the palms of His hand. He numbers the very hairs on our heads, therefore He will not let anything happen to me in childbirth that He didn't have planned from before my own birth...He does not curse us (take away our lives needlessly) because we did not limit the blessings of children - His creations.


If I were or am to die in childbearing, that was planned from before the beginning of time! This life is but a vapor (James 4:14 "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."). Because my life is a mist, I will choose to let God watch out for my well-being while He takes over the creations within me. After all, who could know what's better for me and my babes, but the all-knowing God; Creator of Heaven and earth!


  I trust in God - and God alone. I trust NOT in my limited human understanding. I have a peace that goes beyond understanding, knowing that in following His plan for our family that He will continue to watch out for us, whether I am here to mother or not; whether He chooses to bless us with more children or not. I TRUST IN GOD'S Wisdom, as only HE can see down the road ahead! I rest in His hand! Humans cannot fathom His love. We should not attempt to second-guess His decisions (although it is okay to tell God about our human feelings...He wants to listen to His children).


Because I trust so in my Creator...and the Creator of my children, present and yet to come...I will keep my vow to let HIM plan our family! "I will fulfill my vows to You, O God, and will offer a sacrifice of thanks for Your help. For you have rescued me from death; You have kept my feet from slipping. So now I can walk in Your presence, O God, in Your life-giving light." Psalm 56:12-13


I will continue to worship Him and love Him forever! No matter what storm may come, I will praise Him!


"I lift up my eyes to the hills— where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over you— the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore." Psalm 121


~ Lisa Metzger


P.S. - What a great saying a commenter below shared..."If God's Will is perfect, why worry"! Yes, it might sound trivial to some, but when you REST in God's Will and try your best not to fight it, you find that peace that TRULY does pass all understanding. Yes, there will be a time of sadness, but JOY comes in the morning....whether that morning is tomorrow or a few months from now. It is still sad - losing Levi - but I know that he's with JESUS! How much more perfect can that be? Why should I wish for him to be with me when he can have what he has right now? I know I wouldn't want to come back here after tasting Glory!


I am to still take care of myself and stay within His plan for me...outside of God's Will, I may not be protected as when I'm in His Will. But I also know that if God calls me Home before my children are grown, that HE has the best in mind for them. Such peace when we think of our ALL-KNOWING God being in charge! ~ Lisa (again)


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Feb. 8, 2010

Being Single - Do you feel judged by others who aren't? How does being "Quiverfull" fit into signleness?

Posted in Quiverfull
Q. Where or how do women fit in the quiverfull theology (and in the world) if God has called them to singleness? I married (for the 1st time!) at 38. I have many girlfriends, strong Christian women who simply seem to be called to singleness by God. My sister Homeschools and I have had a little interaction with some of the other homeschool moms and I am always left with the impression that they feel that I am rebelling against God because I was not married. What is a woman's role in God's will if she is not a wife or mother?
 
A. Well, the quiverfull belief (wouldn't really call it a theology, since it's a teaching of God), would not apply to single women. So, if you were single, you might desire to be quiverfull and allow God to plan your family if you ever married, but it would not apply to a single woman since, of course, sexual relations should be confined to marriage, as is stated throughout Scripture.
 
Yes, I believe some are to remain single. I also believe that each person - man or woman - has a high and noble calling on their lives, whether married or single. IF a woman marries, I believe that she is called to raise her children, care for her husband's needs and possibly run a home-business, as is stated throughout Scripture. If she remains single, I believe that she should pursue a career or ministry, as the Lord calls her. If I was had been single for long (I married at 21), I probably would have looked to work with children in some way (possibly missions) or something that would enhance my "career" as a wife/mother in the future, should my marital status change. This would then allow me to earn a living or work for Jesus in ministry while preparing me for a wife or mother's role later on. If that never happened, I could still use those things I had learned about housekeeping, caring for children, running a business, etc. to use in my own household and to maybe teach a young woman (as in Titus 2) as how to effectively run a household or manage a business in a God-fearing way. Married AND single women need those skills! :)
 
There is nothing wrong with being single, but I do believe that most women will marry. That's just how it usually goes. If God has called you to be single, use your talents for God's use! He has and does use single women for His glory EACH DAY! Seek God's Will and use your talents for God, according to Scripture.
 
Blessings to you!
 
~ Lisa

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Feb. 8, 2010

Levi Samuel is with Jesus! Thanking God that I survived!

Posted in Metzger Photos

January 26, 2010 at 9:00, I was rushed by ambulance after sudden, unexpected, heavy hemorrhaging in a matter of 5 minutes. I miscarried (and delivered at home) our precious 4 month old little boy. After going into shock at home in under 10 minutes, I was rushed to the hospital, where I continued to lose massive amounts of blood that led to a blood transfusion of 4 units of blood. After trying my "favorite" drugs for hemorrhaging to no avail, I ended up needing an emergency D&E. They said that if it had been another hour with the bleeding I was having I would have died. Honestly, I can believe that. I am no wimp, but I have never felt that close to death. I was (and still am) beyond exhausted from it all.

 

We named our little guy Levi Samuel which means, "united/ answer to prayer". He was PERFECTLY formed (the ER nurses and EMT's were amazed at how perfect he was). Our other children saw the ambulance and Mommy being wheeled out. They knew at that time that Levi was already in Heaven. After the hysteria subsided, Annalise (17) led all the children in praise songs, while Grandma listened in. They UNITED in PRAYER for Mommy's recovery and saw their prayers ANSWERED! God spared my life miraculously. I was so close to joining Levi in Glory. Thank God for doctors, surgery and the 4 people who donated the blood used in the transfusions! We are all grateful that I am here to raise my 8 children. We are grateful for UNITED PRAYER warriors (yes, even our own children)!


We were able to bury precious Levi On February 3rd (two days before my 33rd birthday, for which I am happy to have been able to celebrate). Photos HERE. It was a small service -with only grandparents and or pastor and his family. Such peace has been brought by being able to lay him to rest! Thank you, Jesus, for that, as well!

 

Again, thank you to all of you who prayed. We still covet your prayers for my recovery (I feel like I've been hit by a truck) and for our emotional healing. Through it ALL, we still praise Jesus and remember these verses, as we heal emotionally and try to figure out what happened and why (pray for doctors to run appropriate tests and to have wisdom!).

 

"I will fulfill my vows to You, O God, and will offer a sacrifice of thanks for Your help. For you have rescued me from death; You have kept my feet from slipping. So now I can walk in Your presence, O God, in Your life-giving light." Psalm 56:12-13

 

"And if our hope in Christ is only for this life, we are more to be pitied than anyone in the world..." ~ 1 Corinthians 15:19

"Heaven is not here, it's There. If we were given all we wanted here, our hearts would settle for this world rather than the next. God is forever luring us up and away from this one, wooing us to Himself and His still invisible Kingdom, where we will certainly find what we so keenly long for." —Elisabeth Elliot

 

~ Lisa


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Feb. 7, 2010

A Baby's Secret - BEAUTIFUL Miscarriage or Stillbirth Poem!

Posted in Quiverfull

A BABY'S SECRET

by Sandi Johnson


I'm just a little person who didn't make it there;
I went straight to be with Jesus,
but I'm waiting for you here.

Don't you fret about me, Mommy,
I'm of all God's lambs most blessed;
I'd have loved to stay there with you,
but the Shepherd knows what's best.

Many dwelling here where I live,
waited years to ent...er in;
Struggled through a world of sorrow,
and their lives were marred with sin.

So, sweet Mommy, don't you sorrow ~
Wipe those tears and chase the gloom ~
I went straight to Jesus' bosom
from my mother's womb.

Thank you for the life you gave me ~
It was brief, but don't complain...
I have all of heaven's glory...
suffered none of earthling's pain. 


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Feb. 7, 2010

It Takes a Turning...

Posted in Quiverfull
Psalm 119:5-6, "Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord; and he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse."

As we read this Scripture, we feel God's heart for families. God longs for the turning of the hearts to children. This should also be our prayer and longing.

We know that that this Scripture was fulfilled in the life of John the Baptist of whom it was said, "He shall be filled with the Holy Ghost... And many of the children of Israel shall he turn to the Lord their God. And he shall go before him in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the disobedient to the wisdom of the just; to make ready a people prepared for the Lord."

God chose John the Baptist to prepare the people for the first coming of Jesus by turning the hearts of the fathers to the children. But Jesus is coming a second time and the way must be prepared again. God is going to do it the same way, by turning the hearts of the fathers (and this also includes the mothers) back to the children. This issue is so important to the heart of God that He says that if it doesn't happen, He will smite the earth with a curse. This is not something we can take lightly.

God started this human race with the mandate, "Be fruitful and multiply" and He is going to finish it the same way. God hasn't changed His attitude toward children. He loves children. He calls them a blessing. When Jesus was on earth he embraced the children to Him and severely reprimanded those who turned them away. How can we be followers of God and yet have a different attitude about children than He does?

Are we on God's agenda or the devil's agenda? Truly it is time for God's people to turn back to His ways. Will we turn or will we have the curse?

Malachi 3:18 says, "Then shall ye return, and discern between the righteous and the wicked, between him that serves God and him that serves him not." Do you notice that it is in returning that we will have understanding and discernment? While we continue to live according to our own agenda, we often live in oblivion to what God really wants. It is when we turn from our own way and turn back to Him and obedience to His Word that we begin to understand truth we have not seen before. Discernment comes after turning.

It is time for us to turn from pride, stubbornness, prayerlessness, disobedience, mediocrity, passiveness and following afar the spirit of this world.

Jesus came to turn us away from ungodliness. "God, having raised up his Son Jesus, sent him to bless you, in turning away everyone of you from his iniquities." (Acts 3:26)

"There shall come out of Zion the Deliverer, and shall turn away ungodliness from Jacob." (Romans 11:26)

"To open their eyes, and to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan unto God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins..."
(Acts 26:18)

"Let us search and try our ways, and turn again to the Lord." (Lamentations 3:40)

"I thought on my ways, and turned my feet unto thy testimonies." (Psalm 119:59)

"Turn thou us unto thee, O Lord, and we shall be turned; renew our days as of old." (Lamentations 5:21)

Which way are we going to turn? This generation and future generations hinge upon our decision.

Love from NANCY CAMPBELL, ABOVE RUBIES

PRAYER:
"Oh God please save me from being deceived. Help me to turn completely to you so that I will discern what is truth and what is your way. Amen."

AFFIRMATION:
My heart is turned towards the Lord.


FURTHER STUDY:

Exhortations to turn back to God:
2 Chronicles 7:14; Job 36:10; Proverbs 1:23; Isaiah 44:22;
Jeremiah 3:14a, 4:1; 19, 22; 18:11; 25:5-6; 36:3, 7;
Ezekiel 14:6; 18:30-31; 33:11;
Hosea 6:1; 12:6; 14:1-2; Joel 2:12-13; Zechariah 1:3-4; Malachi 3:7

We have a responsibility to exhort people to turn back to God:
Jeremiah 23:22; 26:2-3; Ezekiel 33:7-9; Daniel 12:3; Malachi 2:6-7;
Acts 14:15; 26:16-18

Prayers of turning back to God:
1 Kings 8:35-36; 2 Chronicles 6:24-27; Psalm 80:3, 7, 19; 119:37;
Jeremiah 31:18-19; Lamentations 5:21; Hosea 14:1-2

Examples of turning back to God:
1 Kings 18:37-38; Malachi 3:18; 1 Thessalonians 1:9; 1 Peter 2:25

Examples of not turning away from God:
1 Kings 15:4-5; 2 Kings 22:1-2; 23:25; Psalm 44:18; Isaiah 50:5

Examples of turning away from God:
Leviticus 20:6; Numbers 14:43; Deuteronomy 31:18; Judges 8:33
1 Kings 11:1-11; 2 Chronicles 25:27; 29:6-8;
Psalm 78:9, 41, 56-57; Proverbs 28:9;
Isaiah 53:6; 44:20; 59:14-15;
Jeremiah 2:21, 27; 3:10; 5:3; 11:9-11; 15:6-7; 23:14-15; 32:33; 50:6;
Lamentations 1:8-9; Hosea 7:9-16; Amos 4:6, 9-11; Zephaniah 1:4-6; Haggai 2:17;
Acts 7:39; 2 Timothy 4:4

Examples of turning away QUICKLY:
Exodus 32:8; Deuteronomy 9:12, 16; Judges 2:17

Exhortations to turn from evil:
Deuteronomy 5:32-33; 11:16-17; 26-28; 28:14; 29:18-20; 30:17-18;
Joshua 1:7; 23: 6; 1 Samuel 12:20-21;
1 Kings 9:6-7; 2 Kings 17:13; 2 Chronicles 7:14; 19-20;
Psalm 85:8; 125:5; Proverbs 4:27;
Ezekiel 18:24-28; 33:12-20;
2 Timothy 3:5; Hebrews 12:25

God promises and blessings to us if we turn back to Him:
Deuteronomy 4:30-31; 30:9-10; 1 Kings 18:37-38;
2 Chronicles 6:24-27, 37-39; 7:14; 7:19-20; 15:4; 30:6, 9;
Nehemiah 1:9; Job 22:23; Isaiah 55:7; 59:20-21;
Jeremiah 15:19-20; 18:7-10; 24:6-7; 26:2-3;
Ezekiel 18:21-23; 33:14-16, 19;
Joel 2:12-14; Zechariah 1:3; Malachi 4:5-6


Many women like to save these devotions. They print them out and keep them in a folder to read over and over again. Some print them out and pin them on the fridge with a magnet to read through the week. If you are printing this devotion and need it to be smaller, highlight and change to a smaller font.

If you know others who would be blessed by these devotions, you are welcome to forward them or let them know they can subscribe by sending a blank email to subscribers-on@aboverubies.org

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Feb. 7, 2010

Chore List by Age!

I came across this years ago and I LOVE it. Now, all the chores don't apply to our family, but we do use this as a guide. We believe in starting chores at 9-12 months. Yes, 9-12 MONTHS! They can start doing chores with you at that age (putting books and toys away and such as that). The earlier you have your kids doing chores, the easier it will be for you and your household later on...trust me! We are reaping the benefits now! Our household runs so smoothly with soon-to-be 8 kids, now that 7 of them help with daily chores! They have good attitudes about it and do them without being told (well 98% of the time anyway). :)

 

~ Lisa

 

 

9 - 24 months

a.. Putting dirty clothes in hamper.

b.. "Helping" with grocery shopping (putting items in basket and on

check-out counter, handing things to mom to be put away at home.)

c.. Cleaning with mom (give child a dust rag, child size broom, empty

spray can/windex bottle for "pretend" cleaning).

d.. Watering plants (with pre-measured amounts!).

e.. Beginning to help make beds - (begins with handing the pillows to mom

until later).

f.. Yard work (helping collect trash and toys, etc.).

g.. Simple errands ("bring the diaper to mommy, please," etc.).

 

2 - 3 years

a.. As language develops, requiring politeness on a regular basis ("Yes

ma'am", "No sir", "May I please be excused", greeting, etc.).

b.. Generally including child in every-day activities on a regular basis

(cleaning, shopping, etc.).

c.. More complicated errands ("Take this towel and put it in the hamper",

etc.).

d.. Laundry (beginning to help with sorting by mom handing him things to

put in appropriate piles, transferring clothes from dryer to basket, etc.).

e.. Learning more specific neatness qualities (putting toys in proper

spots).

f.. Taking his dishes to the sink and helping to clear table.

g.. Carrying groceries in from car (give child one light item or a small

bag).

h.. General errands (carrying diaper bag into meeting, carrying mom's

purse to the car, etc.).

i.. Simple decision-making ("Would you like juice or milk to drink?").

j.. Put books and magazines in a rack.

k.. Place napkins, plates, and silverware on the table.

l.. Clean up what they drop after eating.

m.. Toilet training.

 

3 -4 years

a.. Making bed (begins with watching mom -- mom helping child -- mom

watching child) standards must be clear and reminders frequent.

b.. Keeping room neat and taking daily responsibility for it.

c.. Regular morning routine becoming established (getting dressed,

cleaning room before breakfast).

d.. More complex decision-making ("Would you like to wear the blue or

green pants?").

e.. Becoming "other-oriented" (drawing pictures for someone, making

encouragement notes to dictate to mom, thank you notes for birthday gifts).

f.. Learning to use the telephone properly.

g.. Established and regular responsibilities (bedroom, getting the mail,

emptying bathroom trash cans, etc.).

h.. Helping wash the car.

i.. Simple hygiene - brush teeth, wash and dry hands and face, and brush

hair.

j.. Undress self - dress with some help.

k.. Carry boxed or canned goods from the grocery sacks to the proper

shelf.

 

4 - 5 years

a.. Taking his laundry to designated place on laundry day.

b.. Sorting laundry with supervision.

c.. Begin learning to fold laundry and put it away.

d.. Hang socks, handkerchiefs, and washcloths on a low line.

e.. Vacuuming/sweeping.

f.. Cleaning table after meals.

g.. Helping with meal preparations (learning to measure, stir and use

small appliances).

h.. Spread butter on sandwiches.

i.. Prepare cold cereal.

j.. Help mother prepare plates of food for the family dinner.

k.. Make a simple dessert (add topping to cupcakes, pour the toppings on

ice cream).

l.. Hold the hand mixer to whip potatoes or mix up a cake.

m.. Setting the table.

n.. Taking out the trash.

o.. Helping make decisions about meal choices, outings, time with friends,

etc.

p.. Carrying groceries in from the car and putting them away.

q.. Help with grocery shopping and compiling a grocery list.

r.. Polish shoes and clean up afterwards.

s.. Follow a schedule for feeding pets.

t.. Help do the dishes or fill the dishwasher.

u.. Dust the furniture.

v.. Share toys with friends (practice courtesy).

w.. Tell parent his whereabouts before going out to play.

x.. Play without constant adult supervision and attention.

y.. Polish silver.

z.. Polish car.

aa.. Sharpen pencils.

 

5 - 6 years

a.. Unsupervised responsibilities (making bed, washing out trash cans,

etc.).

b.. More complicated meal preparations (making frozen juice, toast,

scrambling eggs, cutting with blunt knife, baking).

c.. Make own sandwich or simple breakfast, then clean up.

d.. Pour own drink.

e.. Prepare the dinner table.

f.. Tear up lettuce for the salad.

g.. Helping with younger siblings (changing diapers, helping with bath,

bottle feeding, entertaining while mom is out of the room, feeding/dressing

toddler siblings).

h.. Laundry (sorting, learning to use the washer/dryer, measuring

detergent,fold clean clothes and put them away.) .

i.. Cleaning (using cleaning supplies properly, cleaning unsupervised

areas like bathtub or polishing furniture, clean mirrors and windows).

j.. Sons -- carrying "heavy" things for mom and helping with yardwork.

k.. By this time child will begin to carry out responsibilities unasked

and begin to offer help in areas parents don't require help in.

l.. Make bed and clean room.

m.. Dress on own and choose outfit for the day.

n.. Learn to tie shoes.

o.. Answer the telephone and begin to dial the phone.

p.. Yardwork.

q.. Pay for small purchases.

r.. Help clean out the car.

s.. Take out the garbage.

t.. Decide how he wants to spend his share of the family entertainment

fund.

u.. Feed his pets and clean the living area.

 

6 - 7 years

a.. Simple meals prepared (making sandwiches for lunch, preparing drinks,

fixing breakfast for mom and dad, preparing salad for dinner, peel

vegetables).

b.. Regular quiet time becoming a part of daily routine.

c.. Totally unsupervised laundry responsibilities when needed.

d.. Increased responsibilities for younger siblings (dressing

infants/toddlers, entertaining them for longer periods by reading to

them/playing records, etc., helping school them).

e.. Learning the purpose and beginning usage of tools (lawn mower, hand

tools, etc.) and helping with home maintenance.

f.. Shake rugs.

g.. Water plants and flowers.

h.. Prepare own school lunch.

i.. Help hang clothes on the clothesline.

j.. Hang up own clothes in the closet.

k.. Gather wood for the fireplace.

l.. Rake leaves and weed.

m.. Tie own shoes.

n.. Care for his own minor injuries.

o.. Keep the garbage container clean.

p.. Clean out inside of car.

q.. Straighten or clean out silverware drawer.

r.. Oil and care for bike.

s.. Take phone messages.

t.. Run errands for parents.

u.. Sweep and wash patio area.

v.. Water the lawn.

w.. Wash dog or cat.

x.. Train pets.

y.. Take pet for walk.

z.. Carry in the grocery sacks.

aa.. Get self up in the morning and go to bed at night on own.

ab.. Learn to be polite, courteous, and to share; respect others.

ac.. Carry own lunch money and notes back to school.

ad.. Leave the bathroom in order.

ae.. Do simple ironing.

 

 

8 - 10 years

a.. Complete responsibility for their rooms on a daily basis (bed making,

dresser drawers, closet, vacuuming, etc.).

b.. Unsupervised yard work (i.e., lawn mowing, edging, clean-up,

gardening).

c.. More complex meal preparations (pour and make tea, coffee, and instant

drinks, using sharp instruments, baking, using appliances, beginning meal

planning).

d.. More difficult cleaning projects (scrubbing kitchen floor, windows,

cleaning appliances).

e.. Summer jobs (lawn mowing, dog sitting, babysitting, odd jobs for

vacationers).

f.. Financial planning (computing percentages for saving, tithing,

offerings, gift-giving and assuming responsibility with parental oversight).

g.. Beginning car maintenance (helping dad with minor repairs, learning

tool usage, washing/waxing).

h.. Help rearrange furniture. Help plan the layout.

i.. Run own bathwater.

j.. Help others with their work when asked.

k.. Shop for and select own clothing and shoes with parent.

l.. Change school clothes without being told.

m.. Fold blankets.

n.. Sew buttons and sew rips in seams.

o.. Clean storage room.

p.. Clean up animal "messes" in the yard and house.

q.. Cut flowers and make a centerpiece.

r.. Pick fruit off trees.

s.. Build a campfire, get items ready to cook out (charcoal, hamburgers).

t.. Paint fence or shelves.

u.. Help write simple letters.

v.. Write thank-you notes.

w.. Help with defrosting and cleaning the refrigerator.

x.. Feed the baby.

y.. Polish silverware, copper, or brass items.

z.. Clean patio furniture.

aa.. Wax living room furniture.

ab.. Change sheets and put dirty sheets in hamper.

ac.. Buy groceries using a list and comparative shopping.

ad.. Cross streets unassisted.

ae.. Keep own appointments.

af.. Receive and answer own mail.

ag.. Wait on guests.

ah.. Plan own birthday.

ai.. Simple first aid.

aj.. Do neighborhood chores.

ak.. Sew, knit, or weave (even using a sewing machine).

al.. Do chores without a reminder.

am.. Learn banking and to be thrifty and trustworthy.

an.. Handle sums of money up to $5.00.

ao.. Be alone at home for short periods.

ap.. Take the city bus to selected destinations.

aq.. Proper conduct when staying overnight with a friend. Pack own

suitcase.

ar.. Responsible for personal hobby.

as.. Handle self properly when in public places alone or with peers.

 

11 - 12 years

a.. Join outside organizations, do assignments, and attend. Able to take

responsibility as a leader.

b.. Put siblings to bed and dress them.

c.. Clean pool and pool area.

d.. Respect others' property.

e.. Run own errands.

f.. Mow lawn with supervision.

g.. Help Father build things and do family errands.

h.. Schedule himself time for studies.

i.. Buy own sweets or treats.

j.. Responsible for a paper route.

k.. Check and add oil to car under supervision.

 

13 - 15 years

a.. Determine how late he should stay up during the week. Also determine

how late he should be out for evening gatherings (through mutual

parent-child discussion and agreement).

b.. Responsibility for preparing family meals.

c.. Social awareness: good health, exercise, necessary rest, correct

weight, nutritious food, physical examinations.

d.. Anticipate the needs of others and initiate the appropriate action.

e.. Acceptance of capabilities and limitations.

f.. Self-respect or individual worth.

g.. Responsibility for one's decision.

h.. Mutual respect, loyalty, and honesty in the family. 

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Feb. 7, 2010

What's Your Schedule with 8 Kiddos? How do you do it?

The most-asked question our larger-than-average family gets is this: "How do you handle all those kids AND homeschool?" Well, to be completely honest, we probably get the "How many kids do you plan on having anyway?" one even more often, but you'll have to ask God for the answer to that one. :) I, however, will attempt to explain how we do all that we do with 8 kids, all while keeping the peace and order in our humble abode! So, here we go!

 

 

Mark and I have 8 blessings, ages: 17, 10, 9, 7, 5, 4, 2, and 13 months. Below is our usual schedule, but with a baby and a toddler and life in general this can all change at a moments notice. Overall, I like having a schedule so that the kids know what to expect and when, but I do NOT let it rule me. It's just a guide. It helps tremendously that we school year-round! It allows for extended holiday breaks and breaks throughout the year when I feel "burnout" coming. :) I am also a firm believer that just because a schedule works well for one family it might not work well for another, so keep that in mind when trying to create one of your own!

 

Our Schedule

 

7:00 - wake-up, make bed, tidy up rooms, put away night clothes and eat

7:45 - kitchen chores (95% done by children) and teeth brushed

8:00/8:15 - seatwork (kids sit at kitchen table and do math/spelling/geography/typing - different requirements on different days)

10:30 - Ellie (2) and Judah (1) nap. Yes, Ellie still likes to take 2 naps. I don't cut out the naps until THEY want to do so. Bible and then the Preschool! The older kids teach younger ones preschool (it is really neat to have the older ones learn to teach their siblings...it develops abilities in so many ways!)

12:00 Ellie and Judah wake up

11:00/12:00 - everyone has finished school USUALLY

12:00 or 12:30 - Lunch

After lunch - outside play time/educational games/reading/educational DVD's or YouTube unit studies (this varies according to my whim...ha)

3:00 - Ellie and Judah nap

4:00 - Kids are inside. Afternoon chores (usually it's a pretty light workload). Reading.

5:00 - Get ready for Daddy's homecoming (vacuum, set table, ready dinner, etc.) and wake Julia and Ellie

Dinner

Kitchen Cleanup by kids while Mark and I discuss our days (this is GREAT therapy for Mommy) or read to Judah

 

Nighttime routine is here. 

When do you feel as though you've actually ACCOMPLISHED all that you need to accomplish?

 

I would say that I feel as though I have accomplished everything I needed to accomplish if I have homeschooled the kids, done at least 1 load of laundry, done some everyday chores (dusting, vacuuming, counter tops, general upkeep, etc.), prepared a good meal, had the kids learn life skills of some kind, and I have basically "worked at home" all day. It varies so greatly what I do each day that I would say that if I felt as though I have been a worker at home, according to Titus 2. I am to be loving my husband, loving my children and being busy at home. If I've done that to the best of my ability, then I've accomplished a lot. However, it can get monotonous and it can feel as though I haven't accomplished much, BUT drudgery is part of motherhood and that's all part of God's perfect plan. See this post! The Proverbs 31 is an ideal woman, accomplishing A LOT. I don't believe that any woman could accomplish all that she did every day, and we need to keep that in mind or we'll drive ourselves crazy! BUT Proverbs 31 is a GREAT outline to use overall!

 

Any organizing tips or secrets?

Check out these posts:

Chores ~ How to Get Your Kids to Do them and WHY 

Age Appropriate Chore List

Children's Bedroom Management

7 Ways to Leave Your Clutter

The ABCs of Order in Your Home  

 

1. Never leave a room empty-handed. Always return something to its proper place.

2. 30 second rule....If it takes less than 30 seconds to put away, do it immediately!

3. Have pick up time before Daddy gets home and before lunch time!

4. Teach kids to do chores and to pick up as they go (30 second rule with them, as well)

 

Any tips on how to get the kids to clean up after themselves?

 

As I've mentioned time and time again, we are big on "chore training". My kids all have chores. We use this age appropriate chore list as a guide. Our kids have chores as soon as they can crawl and they will pass them on to a younger sibling when the younger sibling is ready. The younger sibling will become the "apprentice" and the older becomes the "master or teacher". The younger will watch the older do the chore between 2 and 5 times before they attempt it themselves. Then they move onto doing the chore themselves, with the older one watching and instructing PROPERLY (no bossing allowed...Mommy's listening in). After about 2-5 times of the younger doing the chore under the older's supervision and instruction, the younger will do that chore on their own. From that point on, Mommy checks up on them randomly to see if it was completed properly. If it was not, then Mommy instructs the younger on how to correct it. Of course, age is always factored in.....I don't expect my two year old to wipe the table the way I would. BUT, they should be doing it to the best of their ability.

 

How old should a child be when they begin having chores?

 

Our kids start chores as soon as they can crawl, and although it's tedious to Mommy in the beginning, I've found that it pays off BIG TIME in the long run!!!

 

What does God think about chores? Shouldn't kids just be kids?

 

Unfortunately, today's society has taught us that life should be easy, kids should be kids, take the easy way out in life, but in all reality I can't find where it says any of that in Scripture. In fact, Scripture says that LEADERS and SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE will work hard! Shouldn't we be training up the future leaders of tomorrow's familys and world?

 

Using the below Scriptures when teaching children about chores and hard work will mold their spirits now and train them for their futures! This is why we believe that children should regularly contribute to household maintenance.

 

*Work hard and become a leader; be lazy and never succeed. Proverbs 12:24

*He who works his land will have abundant food, but he who chases fantasies lacks judgment. Proverbs 12:11

*All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty. Proverbs 14:23

*Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Colossians 3:22-24

 

What are the consequences for not completing chores?

 

IF chores are not completed with a good attitude and without being asked/reminded, they will either have reading/play time deducted or be given extra chores. This system has worked really well and, honestly, we rarely have an issue with attitudes or chore completion. They know that Daddy and I mean business. They also are used to having chores, because they start doing chores as soon as they can walk. In fact, the older ones are so used to doing their chores and do them with a proper attitude that the younger ones CAN'T WAIT to go into an "apprenticeship" under the older ones to learn the chores! Now, yes, chores get repetitious, but they do get done with correct attitudes and without being told (the majority of the time, anyway - no one's perfect).

 

I hope this was of some help and an encouragement to you! May you all be WORKERS AT HOME and follow God and His Word in all you do!

 

Lisa Metzger


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Feb. 7, 2010

Can I Start Chore Training when My Kids are Older?

Yes! You can! However, each home is so unique that I hate to say that there's a set method or a formula for everyone regarding chores. I would definitely try to get all the kids with a good-sized chore list. Check out my Age Appropriate Chore List for some ideas. 
 
Definitely rely on your older children for help around the house. Don't feel at all badly about it! You're training them for REAL LIFE, which is what homeschooling is all about anyway. Let them know that they are in training, because they are young adults! After all, children became adults at 12 in the Bible and they had a lot more expected of them then than we expect form our teens now.
 
I would also try to instill a sense of duty, responsibility and such with the older ones. If you have girls, you might want to have them start thinking about a hope chest (we gave our 16 year old one for her b-day, but she's been planning for what will go in it - forever!). Instead of having the girls collect material objects right away to put in this "future hope chest," have them collect skills to put in it. After all, every woman/wife/mother needs to know how to do daily chores, such as cooking, cleaning, babysitting, etc. The guys still would benefit from mastering the same skills. After all they might need to rely on them in the case that they are bachelors for a time or when their wife is sick or on bed rest. Their wives will appreciate your training TREMENDOUSLY! Plus, each child needs to feel part of the "team"! They need to feel that they are needed and that their participation makes the house run smoothly.
 
When you decide who's to have what chores, call a family meeting and “lay down the law”. Let them know what's expected, when it's expected, how the chores will be given to a younger sibling when the time is right and the consequences for not doing the chores correctly (without a correct attitude and/or having to be reminded). Then, stick with it! I really think you'll see things change rather quickly. It will take time to train them, but it will be worth it in the long run!
 
We have our kids take over cleaning the ENTIRE kitchen and dining room after dinner so that Mark and I can have some time talking about our day. Boy, has this been SO NICE! We started this when my oldest was 12. Even our 1-2 year olds have chores of cleaning the booster seat and clearing the napkins and salad dressings. It's so doable!
 
Having the kids take naps or go to bed/have quiet time at a certain time frees you up to complete your chores! This is vital to the smoothe running of your home. Do your kids have a regular bed time? If so, great! If not, you'd better start one. At least have them be quiet by reading or having computer time after, say 8:00. For us, we have all the kids 12 and under in bed at 8:00. Annalise (16) goes down to the playroom to read and sew until 9:30. Mark and I have our quiet time from 8:00 on. This is also a great time to have some Bible study time.
 
I would also definitely work on setting an afternoon nap schedule if you still have kids who nap! My kids phase out of naps around 4-5 years old, but you can still utilize a schedule if your 5 year old takes a nap. My 15 month old takes a morning nap and afternoon and my 3 year old just takes an afternoon nap. So, I have both littles down from 3-5:00 which helps a lot. My 4-year-old actually had naps cut out before he came to live with us last year, so that's why he's not down with them. 
 
The key to chore training is to be consistant. Kids love to know their boundaries and they find peace in knowing the consequences for disobedience, even the older ones. So, make a plan and STICK WITH IT! You will see a difference in no time at all!
 
Lisa Metzger

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Jan. 20, 2010

Legalist Hunters and the Hypocrisy that Empowers Them

Posted in Quiverfull

"I always say there are three ways the word legalism is used. The first and most deadly is when we add works to the ground of our salvation, as the Judaizers did. The second, and merely petty, is when we add rules to God's rules. The third, and by far the most common, is this- you are guilty of  legalism when you call on me to submit to the Word of God. May we all never fall into the first. May we be quick to repent of the second. And may we all be boldly guilty of the third." R.C. Sproul Jr.

Read this great post: "Legalist Hunters and the Hypocrisy that Empowers Them" HERE


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Jan. 20, 2010

Free Biblical Feasts Download


Click here or on the image above to download your FREE eChart now

The "Feasts and Holidays of the Bible" eChart shows the date of 10 important feasts and holidays from the Bible.


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Jan. 20, 2010

Should I have a ministry outside the home?

Posted in Homeschool Mom

"You are as much serving God in looking after your own children, and training them up in God's fear, and minding the house, and making your household a church for God, as you would be if you had been called to lead an army to battle for the Lord of hosts."

Charles Spurgeon


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Jan. 9, 2010

So you think I'm a legalist? Are you a legalist? Are you accused of being a legalist? KNOW the difference! EXCELLENT!

Posted in Quiverfull

YOU are a legalist - CLICK HERE!


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Jan. 7, 2010

Do older children in large families feel burdened or blessed?

Posted in Quiverfull

This is another confirmation on how OUR children feel about more children being added to our large family! The above linked article speaks the truth on how the older children in our family (17, 10, and even the other 5 “older” ones) feel about additional children! They are ECSTATIC when they hear another one is “on the way” (whether through birth or adoption). It all depends on how the older ones view children…as either a blessing or a curse! Fortunately, they view children as their father and I do….a BLESSING from the Lord!

~ Lisa Metzger


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Jan. 6, 2010

Information on Family Integrated Churches...

Rethinking Youth Groups

Mentor Series: The Family Integrated Church

Answering Objections to Uniting Church and Family - This is EXCELLENT!


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Jan. 2, 2010

Great Homeschool Finds at the Dollar Store!

Want some new CHEAP ideas for homeschooling? Check THIS out!

Lisa


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Jan. 2, 2010

God watches over mothers...

Posted in Homeschool Mom
"He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young." Isaiah 40:11
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Jan. 2, 2010

Misapplying "Judge Not"...

 "Understand that when at the first sign of scrutiny a teacher or someone in sin says, “Judge not, back off !;” understand this beloved, all they’re doing there is misapplying that verse in order to protect themselves so that they can keep their shtick going. And for falseteachers some of those shticks that they’ve got ...going are pretty lucrative. The last thing that they are really concerned about when they quote that verse is to uphold the righteousness which Jesus teaches in the Sermon on the Mount. Otherwise they wouldn’t twist the Scripture that way." - Don Green


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Jan. 2, 2010

Metzger Family Christmas Video with Name Meanings!

Posted in Metzger Photos

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Dec. 24, 2009

12-year-old speaks out on the issue of abortion

Posted in ProLife

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*Metzger Family 2009 Christmas Newsletter*


The Metzger Children, Fall 2009

Welcome! Mark, Lisa and Ellie 1-20-09

God's In Control!
God's Hands
Mark and Lisa (with Ellie yet to be born)




Thank you, Jesus
Thank you, Jesus
Thank you, Jesus
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus!

Coffee
Endo


Thank you, Jesus!
My 8 Kiddos!
Thank you, Jesus!

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