Song of the day: Evanescence- Bring me to life

Especially the chorus:

Wake me up inside

Wake me up inside

Call my name and save me from the dark

Bid my blood to run

Before I come undone

Save me from the nothing I’ve become........

You see? I'm melancholy. Desolate. Pensive. Despondent. Gloomy.

Fights always do this to me.

I don't know how many people are reading this, but please, I need prayer. Pray for me, for Leopardlover, and for JesusWarrior, as we are all caught up in this thing.

It's long and difficult to explain- but long story short, Leopardlover and I got into a fight that JesusWarrior is caught in the middle of.

Now my best friend is mad at me and my life absolutely stinks... I feel caught between "a rock and a hard place" so to speak.

Let me tell you something.

I know this may sound strange, and completely off topic, but I was in love this past spring.

It fell apart almost as quickly as it started, leaving me utterly heartbroken.

So I saved every email we wrote to each other, every note we passed, every journal entry of mine about him. I sound like a stalker, I know, but it's not like that.

You see, our story makes a very fine STORY. You know, as in once-upon-a-time.

So I saved it all- and now I'm writing the story.

But it's harder than I thought. My heart still isn't fully healed, I guess, and scrounging up painful memories isn't helping.

Then when I told off Leopard (I guess because of my hightened emotional state at this moment. I feel ready to fly off the handle at the smallest thing) right in the middle of all of this, and she's really mad at me and won't return my phone calls...

I feel empty.

I know it sounds stupid to feel this way. After all, you may be thinking, not that much has happened to her.

Oh, but it has. it goes way deeper than my BFF being mad at me- but, somehow, I don't wish to explain anymore right now. I'm tired and I feel worse than I did last night.

I'm sorry for dumping all of this on you. Please, ignore me. I shall get by.

~Allie~