Honey and I are in a Bible Study for parents of teens and pre-teens.  We have been talking about natural consequences for wrong behavior. 

So, we have been trying a few in our household.  For instance, when our children leave their beds unmade, they will find that there is no bedding on the mattress when they retire for the evening.  (This one only occurred once and they have all learned the lesson from it!)  When my teen (who, in his defense has always been on a night owl’s schedule) has not made it into the school room by 9:00 am, having already eaten breakfast, then he loses his IM and xanga time.  (okay, we’re still working on this one.)  One of the other moms is dealing with hateful names between her children.  Her solution was for them to sit by the aquarium while holding their tongues.  The reward for not name calling for a week was to go out for ice cream.  She said that not one has broken the rule this week!  Another mom was having trouble with her daughter slamming a door. The solution?  She removed the door.  Toys and clothes left on the floor?  Take them away.

Okay, so this is working!  And why on earth I have never tried it before, I’ll never know.  Our youth pastor has even given us a contract to sign with our children about character behaviors that they need to work on.  It’s right there on the contract what the wrong behavior is and the punishment that will be given should that behavior continue.  Both the parents and the teens sign it.  So they know that there is a consequence (either a bad one or a good one in the case of the ice cream) for their behavior.