As someone who grew up going to church every week I don't like missing services on Sunday. It just doesn't feel right. But now that I am Orthodox these feelings have been heightened. I am effected by missing the Eucharist, and not in a good way. So, after missing church this past Sunday it was a blessing to have them this morning to celebrate the Ascension of our Lord. I had not eaten so well (or very much) yesterday and was doubly hungry this morning. I was exhausted from a delayed flight and hours spent waiting, and waiting some more. So this morning I wrapped my tired and hungry self into the loving cloak of the Church: the icons, candles, incense, and music enveloping me in their warmth.
"For He has satisfied the thirsty soul,
And the hungry soul He has filled with good things."
Ps. 107:9
Partaking of the Eucharist has become a rich blessing that even my children have taken notice of. But it is not easily remarked upon, especially by this blogger. How does one explain such things? It is a miracle and a mystery. Sometimes I feel like the blind man, whom Jesus healed in the Temple, "All I know is that I was blind and now I see." (John 9:25) Don't ask me to explain anything.. all I know is that I am changed.
"Taste and see that the Lord is good."
Ps. 34:8
** Photo credit from St. Innocent of Moscow Russia Orthodox Church
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Its funny how church turned out for me today. I was terribly distracted during services. It was one of those weeks where I just couldn't settle down and quiet my soul. But, even so, after getting home there was this deep and profound sense of joy and contentment. Between the words of the Liturgy, the words of the Gospel and Epistle, and receiving Christ Himself in the Eucharist it changed me. Not that I should excuse any problems on my part and allow spiritual laziness to crop in. But sometimes our goals and reality are far apart. Thank God He comes to us us where we are.
Today was the Sunday of the Paralytic at the Sheep's pool from John 5. I thought it was pretty ironic.
Kontakion for the Sunday of the Paralytic
Tone 3
By Your divine intercession, O Lord,
as You raised up the paralytic of old,
so raise up my soul, paralyzed by sins and thoughtless acts;
so that being saved I may sing to You:
“Glory to Your power, O compassionate Christ!”
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In the Orthodox church the week after Pascha is set aside as Bright Week. The Paschal joy continues and no fasting is permitted. Last week I asked the kids what foods they wanted to celebrate with. The call went up for Bacon Pizza, Hot dogs and hamburgers, and Chinese. Not exactly home cookin' but it does get me off the hook. I heard from my daughter that one family at church was having their favorite food flown in from out of state... now that's some serious fast-breaking! After Bright Monday services yesterday, some of us were saying we were going to have church withdraw. We've gone from a few services a week, to once a day, to twice a day and now we won't have anything until Sat. evening Vespers. I will miss the services but it is good to be home in the evenings again. Hubby is also happy to have his family back.
Father Stephen has some very touching thoughts concerning Bright Week and the death of a friend titled: And Into the Brightness.
Enjoy. |
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Mar. 30, 2007 Lent is almost over...Holy Week is coming
I'm trying to finish my Daily Lenten reading challenge by Sunday or Monday. I'm going to skip Leo the Great's Letter #28 and sermon on the Feast of Nativity. Next week will be full. Church everyday - sometimes twice. The crazy mixed up days with Vespers in the morning and Matins in the evening as the church prepares us for the upside down, out of time, moments of His suffering and Resurrection.
Tomorrow is Lazarus Saturday with a Liturgy in the morning celebrating the pre-figuring of Christ's triumph over death. This along with Palm Sunday is a 2 day celebration bridging Lent with Holy Week.
"When Jesus arrived at Bethany, Lazarus was already dead four days.... The four day burial underscores the horrible reality of death. Man, created by God in His own image and likeness, is a spiritual-material being, a unity of soul and body. Death is destruction: it is the separation of the soul and body....This mystery of death is the inevitable fate of man fallen from God and blinded by his own prideful pursuits."
Services of Lazarus Sat. and Palm Sunday
Introduction by Fr. Paul Lazor
pg.5
Then Palm Sunday with procession of the Palms and willows branches. In Eastern Europe, palms were not available to the early church so the tradition of using willow branches began and is still used today.
"This day [Palm Sunday] together with the raising of Lazarus are signs pointing beyond themselves to the mighty deed and event which consummate Christ's earthly ministry. The time of fulfillment was at hand. Christ's raising of Lazarus points to the destruction of death and the joy of resurrection which will be accessible to all through His own death and resurrection. His entrance into Jerusalem is a fulfillment of the messianic prophesies about the king who will enter his holy city to establish a final kingdom...
Finally, the events of these triumphant two days are but the passage to Holy Week: the "hour" of suffering and death for which Christ came. Thus the triumph in a earthly sense is extremely short-lived."
Services of Lazarus Sat. and Palm Sunday
Introduction by Fr. Paul Lazor
pp 7-8
By raising Lazarus from the dead before thy Passion,
Thou didst confirm the universal resurrection, O Christ God!
Like the children with the palms of victory, we cry out to
Thee: O Vanquisher of Death!
Hosanna in the highest!
Blessed is He that comes in the name of the Lord.
Troparion sung for both
Lazarus Saturday and Palm Sunday
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This Friday our parish is holding a traditional Akathist to the Theotokos, which is held the Fifth Friday of Lent. The meaning of the word is Akathist is: "not sitting"... which I find quite funny. When do Orthodox sit and pray? Occasionally during some of the later Litanies in church people will sit, but this is an exception rather than the rule.
Standing for prayer was probably one of the first things that became second nature to me when converting. Quite early on I found it awkward to even sit for grace at mealtime. There have been times when I have sat at home for private prayers but each time it seemed that my mind wandered more than normal. It was like sitting to pray was telling my mind it was rest time, not a time to pay attention. It would almost become a sleepy time. Perhaps the mere act of standing for prayer (and especially standing in front of my icon corner) was an inner way the Church calls me, even as it calls out many times during Sunday morning:
"Let us attend!"
Yes, pay attention, listen closely, pay attention. Its a battle I often have as I stand there praying. I've been reading about the Life of St. Anthony and its plainly obvious that here is a man acquainted with spiritual battles. However, St. Anthony never mentions the grocery lists, forgotten laundry, and age old conversations (or disagreements) as one way the devil tries to distract us from communion with God. As I've read his life I have been pondering the distractions that fill my mind during prayer... I have been seeing them as they really are - a battle - "not against flesh and blood..." I really must take them more seriously than I have in the past.
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Mar. 15, 2007 Prayers for today
Let my prayer arise, in Thy sight as incense
and let the lifting up of my prayer
be an evening sacrifice.
Set a guard before my mouth,
and set a seal on the door of my lips.
Let my prayer arise, in Thy sight as incense
and let the lifting up of my prayer
be an evening sacrifice.
Let not my heart be inclined to evil, or make excuses for my sins.
Let my prayer arise, in Thy sight as incense
and let the lifting up of my prayer
be an evening sacrifice...."
**From the Liturgy of the Presanctified Gifts
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Prayer of St. Ephrem
O Lord and Master of my life,
take from me the spirit of sloth, faint-heartedness,
lust of power, and idle talk
Prostration
But give rather the spirit of chastity, humility,
patience, and love to Thy servant.
Prostration
Yea, O Lord and King, grant me to see my own transgressions
and not to judge my brother,
For blessed art Thou unto ages of ages
Amen
Prostration
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Mar. 1, 2007 Sometimes It Just LEAPS Off the Page at You
Well.. in this case it was off the computer.
"He died to be our Passover Lamb. That’s why He died at Passover. The Passover Lamb died to provide its flesh to feed God’s people, and its blood to ward off the angel of death. Our Passover Lamb feeds us on His glorified flesh and gives us to drink from the Fountain of Immortality."
Anastasia Theodoridis
a response in a discussion here
I love this quote and am so glad that Anastasia let me quote it here. It blessed me tremendously. I had thought about the connection between the Passover Lamb and the Cross before (I spoke about it here). What struck me was the connection between the Passover Lamb and Christ's body and blood at the Eucharist. I'd never seen that before. Thanks Anastasia.
Here is more of what she wrote:
"He died to share our human lot to the last, bitter dregs, and to redeem it. “Whatever is not assumed is not healed.” [ed. note: Ireaneus]
He died to tread that dark path before us, so that now, when we walk it, we find it full of His Light, full of His Love, full of Himself. That makes of it something that is NOT death as we had known it, at all! That transforms death into the gateway to new life.
He died to exercise *perfect* love. Love cannot be said to have been perfect unless it has been tested to the fullest.
Similarly, obedience cannot be said to have been perfect unless it is tested under the most extreme conditions. "
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Feb. 25, 2007 Church, Snow, and Bright Week
Today we headed off to church with wet roads and a rainy, icy pellet mix. When we were all finished there was about 3" of snow on the roads and by the time I got home there was at least 4"-5". We made it home but our van did not. Moby (guess what color it is  ) will have to spend the night slightly on a neighbor's lawn (better than on their mailbox). We have a hill that is just steep enough to make going up in snowy or icy weather near impossible. I heard from reliable sources that there are 2 other cars keeping Moby company tonight.
The 1st Sunday in Lent the Orthodox Church celebrates the Triumph of Orthodoxy. Fr. Matthew Jackson has a nice sermon explaining the historic event. But the best part of today's service at our parish was the Chrismation of a friend of mine. May God Grant Andrea many years!
We're one week into Lent and my kids have already begun putting in meal orders for the first week after Pascha. Silly kids. |
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Feb. 13, 2007 Last Judgment
This past Sunday was the Sunday of the Last Judgment from the Parable in Matthew. I spent a long pondering and nothing I tried to write seemed to do it justice.
Father's sermon reminded us that God is love (why would a loving God judge us, he began). This got me going on a bunny trail (yes, my mind was wandering during the sermon). I was thinking back on the quote from one of last week's blog entries that said: "only the loving can accept love." And really the parable is ultimately living a life of love. Visiting those in prison, comforting those who are sick, and feeding the hungry are examples of how to love someone. Jesus is not asking to do something He didn't already do in His earthly ministry: He fed the hungry, released people from their demonic prisons, and healed the sick.
It is interesting and quite frightening to note that in the parable Jesus teaches us it is not what you believe but how you live that decides your fate. Scary stuff. I don't want to face that part of death... I like the comfort of "if I only believe and confess". I want the lovey-dovey Jesus that accepts me no matter what. Dietrich Bonhoeffer called that "cheap Grace" and the Church teaches that we can't pick and choose our favorite parts of God. Jesus is pushing me further up and further in.
It is not a mistake that the Church placed this remembrance the week after the Parable of the Prodigal. God is still loving and He always accepts a repentant heart, but after repentance we must all begin to take up our Cross and follow Him. If the scripture "Everyone who loveth is born of God." is true then Jesus is saying to us "Walk your talk."
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