- Monday Meanderings

Monday, October 8, 2007

Monday Meanderings

I’m sitting here drinking a cup of tea and wondering if I should try to eat something but... the truth is I’m too weary or is it lazy (?) to try to figure out what.

I’m wishing I was asleep.

I’m tempted to grab my book and crawl back into bed. I tried to crawl back into bed earlier this morning, but I ended up with four kids on top of me…somehow it just wasn’t worth it. I think I’m feeling my age. It dawned on me earlier this morning that I was supposed to write this out yesterday...oops...I completely forgot. I was too busy…and I honestly just didn’t feel like looking at my computer at all. I didn’t even turn it on.

Lately, I’ve been pondering what our children’s future homes will look like and I’m troubled by the crazy picture that pops up…I fear that there will be little or no social interaction between family members. I have this picture of family members -age five and up-all sitting with their heads stuck in a computer of some sort. There will be no need to talk because when they want to talk to one another they will simply email, instant message, text, or use some other method to type out what they want to say. (Sorry, if I’ve mangled my computer terminology…I don’t keep up with the latest techno lingo.) Think this is far fetched? Maybe. But tonight take a look at your home and what the occupants are doing. Recently I was at someone’s house for a party and four out of the five members of the family had a laptop in front of them. There was no talking…no noise except the sound of the TV in the background… all heads were buried in a computer and when they weren’t they were looking at, typing on, or talking on their cell phones…

Well, that is enough meandering. Here is this week’s list:

Bible, Etc.

Same as last week. Continuing onward. (I should finish A Sweetness to the Soul this week. If I do, then I will start The Parting by Beverly Lewis.)

Must Do

1. Same as last week – keep up with house and chores. I didn’t manage to do this last week. I can’t seem to keep up with the laundry. Suddenly it is bigger than me. (I guess I’d better get ready because it’s going to get bigger still.)

2. ~~Catch up on emails~~ – still haven’t done this.

3. Holiday planning – didn’t do this either.

4. ~~Go to the Post Office~~

5. ~~Take Mark’s shirts, etc. to the drycleaner~~

6. ~~Buy the kids new shoes and Bethany a few dresses for church~~ (Just an aside…I went out Saturday in search of clothes for Bethany and found nothing! (Long sleeves and fleece filled coats just don’t cut it…it is still in the 90’s here! What are these designers thinking?! Do they know something about the coming winter that I don’t?)

My Zones – not related to Fly Lady zones.

Only one this week – clean the boy’s bedroom closet. If I’m brave enough I may post before and after pictures, but it is a nightmare mess that I’m not sure I want to share. A while back Bethany and Caleb pulled all of Caleb’s clothes off the hangers and although I’ve put a few back up (only because they happened to be in the laundry) the rest are still all over the closet floor – and the closet was a mess to begin with so I’m sure you can imagine what it looks like now. I’ve been putting this mess off because it is so huge and I have been feeling so puny. But, it has to be done as I can no longer locate any of Caleb’s shirts and I’m getting tired of digging through the pile.

Train Them Up

Same as last week. Add consistency with Bess…as in me getting up and pulling her off the dining room table instead of sending one of the older kids to do it.

Meals – not in any order

From last week…

1. Cheese and Chicken Enchiladas

2. ~~Ravioli Lasagna~~

New

3. White Chili (slow)

4. Creamy Chicken and Veggies (slow)

5. Chicken Salad Sandwiches or Salad with Chicken Salad on top or Salad and Chicken Salad Sandwiches or Chicken Salad Sandwiches and Tomato Soup…whichever I happen to feel like when I make it.

6. ~~Whole Wheat Pizza~~ (we have this every Friday)

7. ~~Swiss Steak~~

8. ~~Baked Dijon Chicken~~ (any left-overs used for lunch or another dinner served with whole wheat angel hair pasta.)

9. Optional meal – if I don’t feel up to cooking - ~~Spaghetti~~ with meat sauce or a frozen meal. (Note: Didn't make it with meat sauce - made it with chicken, spinach and diced tomatoes tossed in olive oil.

Btw, here is how you too can get involved in Monday Meanderings.

blessings,

dani

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might. (Ecclesiastes 9:10)

Comments

• Monday, October 8, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Bird

I have this picture of family members -age five and up-all sitting with their heads stuck in a computer of some sort. There will be no need to talk because when they want to talk to one another they will simply email, instant message, text, or use some other method to type out what they want to say.

Pick your poison. Computers and cell phones are the new media, only replacing the time-honored-time-wasting endeavor called "television watching."

I can't count how many times we've gone over to friends' homes, only to hear the blaring of the TV constantly in the background (I'm sure y'all have experienced that millions of times too). I must say, compared to that noise, I'd much prefer silent typing. :-)

At any rate, it's a good thing to think about. Cheap computers and wireless connections have changed the face of household media.

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - I agree

Posted by dlmiranda

If I had my way, we wouldn't even own a TV...I don't think TV is good either...but...at least with TV there is some interaction between family members. (Assuming that there is a central TV and the members of the family are not all locked away in their bedrooms with their own TV's. That's how it was for me growing up. My kids will not have TV's in their rooms. I don't want them deciding to not be part of the family.) The weird thing about computers is that each person is shut up in their own world even if every one is in the same room...interaction between members is limited and when a person is interrupted it often causes annoyance or anger...that shouldn't result.

And often not only are they lost in the computer, they are also wearing headphones so they can't even hear you when you do try to talk to them. :(

I'm not saying technology is bad - I love it...but it does change the way we interact with one another.

This was just one of those weird things I think about sometimes...but I won't be surprised if in the future we start hearing a lot about self control (learning to control the time spent on the computer) vs computer addictions.

I often feel that the computer steals my time. Time I know I should be doing something else...like right now Bess just woke up and she is waiting for me to go and get her up. Making her wait once in awhile isn't bad, but is what I'm doing now better?

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Brandi

Dani, we don't own a Gameboy, so I don't know first hand. But it seems to me that the same type of isolation can easily happen with kids and Gameboys as with adults and laptops. Have you found this to be true?

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Anonymous

Hey Dani!

Grace to you as you accomplish everything you have to do this week! I don't think I would be able to keep up with you!

I hear ya about when technology becomes too much, and I know I'm guilty of over-indulging. But don't worry too much about your kids. I've communicated more with my brothers since the dawn of the internet/text message/blog age than probably EVER. Sad, but true. Sometimes we're sitting in the same house, or even room, and are chatting with each other over the comp rather than face-to-face! Sometimes it's easier that way. It's a crazy time we live in!

-Debbie

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - Games

Posted by dlmiranda

Brandi,

Yes and no. It's safe to say that I really dislike gameboys, video games, etc. but not for the reasons I spoke about above. These games don't always isolate my children because they have figured out how to play together even though only one of them is actually using the controller. It's hard to explain this but basically they have created talking stories that go along with each game. I say 'talking' because their "game" involves each of them speaking a part - For example, Aaron will play the actual video game while Beth and Caleb watch and speak their "parts" out loud. Aaron plays one character, Bethany another, and Caleb another still...The really crazy thing is that Beth and Caleb are usually involved in something else while they do this...for example Bethany will draw and Caleb will play a game, while Aaron plays the actual video game. Sorry, I know this is confusing. The truth is - they all prefer two player games even on the gameboy...we just don't have very many. We are very stingy with games...and Aaron is almost always required to trade one to get one and to pay for it himself.
That said, at times they are isolated when they play…especially Caleb… but even so he often talks to me while he plays and/or shows me each time he reaches a new level. If they were only children, or if there were only two of them, I think they would be more isolated. Maybe they will be as they get older…I don’t know. Bethany sometimes gets left out of the games or just doesn’t want to play as she doesn’t really like video games…but I think this is just normal when three kids play together…unfortunately one is often left out. But, in our family, they are usually left out of a game by choice more than because they weren’t invited to play.
Another funny thing is that all their games involve chapters…I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard one of them say, “Okay, chapter one…”

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - Thanks Debbie

Posted by dlmiranda

I need all the grace I can get! ;)

You have to admit that there is something crazy sad about people being in the same room and texting/instant messaging each other instead of talking. I can see the benefit - maybe...but, it still seems a little antisocial or something - esp. if there are people in the room who are not involved in the computerized conversation.

Good to hear from you. Are you home sick?

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• Tuesday, October 9, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Bird

The weird thing about computers is that each person is shut up in their own world even if every one is in the same room...interaction between members is limited

Sure, that can be the case, but it doesn't have to be the case. As Boo mentioned we have intereacted via IM while in the same room before ... I think it more had to do with having a "conversation" where we didn't have to talk over a TV or unnecessarily involve others in a one-on-one discourse. I think it's safe to say that in our extended family in Houston at least, 95 percent (maybe more) of the communication is done voice-to-voice, the old fashionied way.

and when a person is interrupted it often causes annoyance or anger...that shouldn't result.

I can say with a clear conscience that I have never, ever, experienced annoyance (and especially anger) when I've "interupted" one of the family members at the comp. So maybe that's been an experience you've had with some friends, but that certainly has not been the case, not even once, at my parent's house or our house here in Waco.

And often not only are they lost in the computer, they are also wearing headphones

Same thing about headphones. I think my dad is the primary headphone user in our family. I don't think I've ever seen Boo or my mom using them. I know my bro has sometimes. I try to avoid using them at home when I'm on the comp so I can be responsive to the family [wow, case-in-point -- I just went to check on Abby and Daniel in Abby's room because Abby was getting a little too crazy]. I'll admit that if someone is tuned out with headphones, then they're completely lost to any possible interaction. I tend to only use them at night when I'm in bed next to Brandi or working on something after family hours so to speak and don't want to wake anyone up with the music.

I'm not saying technology is bad - I love it...but it does change the way we interact with one another.

So true. And that's where I have to differ a bit on the matter of television. I think computers and cell phones actually foster interaction between people who normally would not communicate very much otherwise (e.g. me and Jared).

To me, TV seems a much less likely technology for nurturing any type of interaction, unless you're being very proactive about it.

But it seems to me that the same type of isolation can easily happen with kids and Gameboys as with adults and laptops.

Yes, I'd agree. While Mark and Dani's kids seem to work out group play over a Gameboy very well, that is definitely not the norm. I don't think our kids would be able to manage any sort of interaction happening over a 3" screen. :-) Now Gamecubes on the other hand ...

At any rate, we live in challenging times. It's a challenge to have all of this wealth, food, temptation, and technology at our fingertips without constantly over-indulging.

Despite all the bells and whistles of technology, nothing beats reading a good book -- which is, ironically, a usually solitary undertaking.

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• Wednesday, October 10, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by 4sweetums

We have very strict rules for how much time anyone can be on the computer or TV in our house. For the most part we do not have problems with it but I sure have noticed real problems in other homes. I was trying to set up a playdate recently and the mother had to look at the tv schedule to see when her child was available. Then the child arrived with a gameboy and sat in a corner while my kids played outside. I couldn't draw him out at all. SAD!
Blessings,
4sweetums

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• Wednesday, October 10, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by dlmiranda

Bird,

I too have been pondering whether or not reading a book is any different. Growing up we never watched TV, but everyone read a book...there certainly was no interaction going on then either.

About headphones - I was thinking of my hubby.

About frustration - I was thinking about myself.

About interaction - I agree that computers have allowed people who are far away to interact with one another - you and I - for example would never talk otherwise...but I was talking about same room interaction - if Mark and I are in the same room should we talk to one another or IM one another? How much better to put the computer away, turn off the TV, and send the kids to another room so we can sit next to one another and have a conversation. Sure it's fun to send a message via the computer...and sometimes just to be silly we will do that, but I try to be off the computer at night so that I can be available...so he or the kids can talk to me if they want. Maybe it is just a woman thing to feel this way or maybe it's just me

...Debbie doesn't feel this way because she isn't married and doesn't have the same responsiblilties...for the most part her time is still her own.

Also...you are thinking primarily of yourself and your family while I was thinking of other families who do not necessarily hold to your same values....for example in a home where the family is slightly disfunctional...and where there is more than one laptop/computer...it could be that all the family memembers spend more time on the computer talking to other people (who they don't even know) than they do each other.

I guess this topic is really about me...I find myself asking, "Is this worthy?" Meaning the time I spend on the computer...or is it really just a waste of time? Is it a good use of my time or is there something else I should/could be doing that is better? More needed? More important? Like reading a book to the kids, or taking them for a walk, or cleaning my house, or a million other things...it is a question I ask myself often. And often the answer is that I should have been doing something else.

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• Wednesday, October 10, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Anonymous

...Debbie doesn't feel this way because she isn't married and doesn't have the same responsiblilties...for the most part her time is still her own.

Thanks for reminding me that I'm all alone! *sniff*sniff*

;o)

But I do need to be conscious about getting off the internet and taking care of the responisibilities I do have; same goes for the times I get caught up reading a good book!

And Bird's right. When I think about it, our IM convos in the same room usually involve us teasing each other. So it's better that it's not done verbally. But I'm positive when I have a husband and family I will keep the computer time to a minimum in the evenings.

Hope you're having a great day, Dani! I'm actually at work, not home sick. But my kids are "resting" right now, so I decided to see what's happening in the blogosphere. Gotta get back, though. Ciao!

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• Wednesday, October 10, 2007 - Untitled Comment

Posted by Bird

I was talking about same room interaction - if Mark and I are in the same room should we talk to one another or IM one another? How much better to put the computer away, turn off the TV, and send the kids to another room so we can sit next to one another and have a conversation.

Yes, that is much preferred! If the point is to actually have a "conversation" rather than just do a quick, informal communication. (And even if that isn't the point, it's sometimes a lot faster just to say what you want to say rather than typing it out.)

The truth is, I'm not 100 percent sure that me and Boo, or me and Sha, or me and anyone have had a real conversation on IM while we're in the same room. Usually it's quick communications -- mostly humorous -- about something or another. The novelty of IM'ing actually makes it more funny.

Now a household where that type of communication actually takes the place of real conversation is a very sad thing to think about. Knowing you guys the way we do, I'm sure that'll never happen! ;-)

...Debbie doesn't feel this way because she isn't married and doesn't have the same responsiblilties...for the most part her time is still her own.

Perhaps. Perhaps not. We'll let Debbie decide ...

it could be that all the family memembers spend more time on the computer talking to other people (who they don't even know) than they do each other.

So sad. So true.

I find myself asking, "Is this worthy?" Meaning the time I spend on the computer...or is it really just a waste of time?

That's something we all need to ask ourselves. That's part of the problem I have with TV. While Brandi and I enjoy some shows, it's easy to get sucked in and spend hours a day watching mindless shows or playing mindless games.

Speaking of mindless games, tell Mark I've got a hankering for some Madden Football on Gamecube. ;-)

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About Me

Ponderings about faith, family, homeschooling and whatever else happens to be on my mind as we walk the narrow way.

About Us

Me/dani, Mark/hubby, Aaron (9), Bethany (7), Caleb (5), Elisabeth/Bess (2),
and Benjamin (3/30/08)

"The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; You hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed I have a beautiful inheritance." -Psalm 16:5-6 (ESV)