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I have been doing Bible Study with a group of women from my church based on Debi Pearl's book, "Created To Be His Help Meet". If you have never heard of the Pearls, they head up "No Greater Joy" ministry and have written books on child training, etc. They have a no nonsense, no holds bared, no sugar coating, but very Biblical writing style. I have had this book for years and tried a couple of times to read it on my own. I consider myself to be an old fashioned girl, yet some of what Debi says in this book was very hard for me to swallow. When I decided to swallow my pride and begin submitting to my husband and ultimately the Lord, things started getting so much better in my marriage. Not that I had a BAD marriage, but all marriages can use help.
So I was reading our chapter for this week last night and got hit right between the eyes with truth that felt like a 2x4 for the umteenth time while reading this book! Chapter 20 is where Debi talks about being a "keeper at home". The last section in the chapter is titled, "Leaving Home by Phone, E-mail, and Chat Rooms". She could easily have added IM. Here are excerpts from the last three paragraphs in the chapter:
"Modern inventions have provided a way for a woman to stay at home and still not be a keeper at home. We can sit at home in body while traveling in spirit by means of the telephone and the computer...
'Keeping the home' is more than staying at home; it is having a heart that is fixed on the home. A help meet will be in engaged in creative enterprises that challenge and inspire the children. She will guard the home against outside influences, and she will always be on the watch to protect the children from their own inventions of evil. She will not be idle and neither will her children. She will ease her husband's load by painting the hall and cutting the grass. She will be frugal in all her endeavors, and she will teach the children to love serving Daddy. She will keep the home so that when Daddy comes home, it is to a sanctuary of peace, love, and order.
A real help meet will make herself useful to her man instead of wasting her time."
I had to take a step back and look at how I have been spending my time. I have two friends whom I love to chat with via IM. One of these friends moved out of state a few years ago so this is the easiest way to stay in touch with her. That wouldn't be a problem if I didn't spend so much time also going between e-mail, face book and my blog. I end up spending the greater part of the afternoon on my laptop most days. I justify this by telling myself that I'm still watching my kids, (but am I? I mean REALLY?). Also only the most basic of housework gets done. I don't seem to "find" the time to spend in God's Word, unless I do it right before I go to bed at night.
This has not been fun seeing all this in myself, but I am sooooo thankful that my God loves me enough to call me on the carpet for this! In the future I will be spending far less time on the computer during the day! Oh, btw, when I shared with my husband how God is dealing with me on this, he told me that my computer usage time has been bothering him for some time now. He wasn't sure how to bring it up to me without me getting upset and defensive. It is so wonderful that God can/will step in and take over where my husband fears to tread! |
