I know this poem is way-simplistic for me, but I found only simple words to express from my simple-minded point of view a miracle to wonderful for me, something too lofty for me to attain. This poem is proof that I am not a genius.

Chapter Six of the Erwin Story. (If anyone can think of a concise name other than The Erwin Story, please let me know!)

Pastor Davies felt entirely unprepared to address his congregation, but he knew he must. Today was Thursday, then he still had Friday and Saturday to write a new message. What on earth would he say? He had no ideas. He just knew that he had been missing something vital to his spiritual life, and his flock was missing it as well.

Pastor Davies grabbed a yellow legal pad, his Bible, and a Clickster pencil. After informing his seceretary that he was leaving early for the day, he sauntered out into the church parking lot. Finding a comfortable nook among the garden arbouritums, he threw himself onto the green grass.

"Alright, God," he said. "What do I say now that I've had my third conversion? What will my people think? Please help me as I guide them into all truth."

And this is what Pastor Davies said to his congregation a few short, thrilling days later.

"I'm about to say things to you that had never entered my mind before. Not even Laurie has heard what God has laid on my heart to say to you this morning. If you have fallen asleep during all my messages, do not fall asleep during this one.

"I have been a terrible pastor to you all. I was not teaching and feeding you the whole council of God, for I myself didn't know it all.

"I have mostly failed to defend the hope that lies within me, and there is one paramount reason I have failed to do so. I didn't know if hope truly lay within me. I was not sure I was saved. I was not sure anyone could know if they were saved. I was not sure that a saved person would be saved forever. But now I know.

"Many of you no doubt recognize this song. The title is "I Give You Freedom," and we have sung it as a congregation many times. This song, and many others, I have come to realize, depict a God far different from the God of the Bible. They describe Jesus as the author, but not the finisher, of our faith.

"I have, to my shame, condemned from this pulpit those who teach the doctrine of election. I did so out of total ignorance of the Scriptures and of the truth. I was blinded by liberalism and the devil. I stand before you today reformed . . . and a Calvanist."

A quiver went through the audience. Whispering voices ruffled and disturbed the reverential hush that had prevailed in the amphotarium. An interested listener loudly "Shhh"-ed the whole lot, and order was regained.

"I would like to request something from you. It is now the beginning of October. I'd like to request a leave of absence for the months of November and December. I need to think, to study, and most importantly, to pray. I need to seek the Scriptures to find if these things are so. I need time. . . . I don't know yet who will replace me. I have an individual in mind, but I have not yet discussed my choice with the deacons, so I will wait before announcing his name. In the mean time, I would like you as a congregation to pray for me, and with me. My whole theology has been shaken from it's decaying foundation, and there is nothing left but what the Bible says. I hardly know where to begin. I have so much to re-learn and learn for the first time, but I want to know that my church stands behind me.

"I conclude with the words of Martin Luther of old. 'Hier stehe ich; ich kann nicht anders. Gott helfe mir! Amen. Here I stand; I can do no other. God help me. Amen.'

Pastor Davies did not wait for any feedback, positive or negative. He immediately made his way home where he met his wife. Laurie's Bible was open on her knees to Ephesians, and tears streaked her face. Through her sobs, she whispered "I love you, my brave husband! I will be your Katy as you stand like Martin Luther."

Pastor Davies smiled, greatly releaved, and kissed away his wife's tears. "I was hoping you would see things this way, Laurie. You are a woman to be blessed!"

--To be continued.

My long over-due fifth chapter. Please read and review!

Erwin braced himself for an anticipated lecture. Marcus would not be happy, Erwin was sure. Marcus drew quick, short breaths, and Erwin waited. He turned his keys in the ignition and the Toyota jumped to life, and still nothing came. Marcus kept exhaling, as if he was going to say something, and then he would sigh, and his face appeared strangely resigned.

Suddenly, his reaction came like a flood. "I don't understand you, Erwin. How can you turn God into a monster like that? How can you say that not everyone has the spiritual capacity to be saved? Your doctrine demonstrates a heart full of pride and self-importance. To me, you seemed to be bragging." Then he stopped speaking as suddenly as he had begun.
Erwin sent up a silent plea for grace and wisdom in answering. "Marcus, you say I have turned God into a monster. God is loving, yes, but God is also just. He is merciful, but full of holy wrath. I know those two pairs don't seem to go together, but they do, really. God loves holiness, and God must judge sin since it is defiance of His laws. God is merciful, but His mercy will not be with held forever. I would be careful of saying one believes God is a monster just because one believes in election. Those who believe in hell have been accused of turning God into a monster."

Marcus listened in stony silence.

"Your favorite book of the Bible is 1 Peter, isn't it?"

Marcus mumbled "Correct."

"You have memorized a great deal of it, right?" Erwin pursued.

"Yes," Marcus said. "I just finished memorizing the final chapter last week."

Good. Small talk was helping. "Would you please recite the second chapter until I stop you?"

"Certainly. 'So put away all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander. Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation— if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good. As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. For it stands in Scripture: “Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone, a cornerstone chosen and precious, and whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.”So the honor is for you who believe, but for those who do not believe, “The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone,” and “A stone of stumbling, and a rock of offense.” They stumble because they disobey the word, as they were destined to do.' "

"Okay, stop. The last phrase you said was 'They stumble because they disobey the word, as they were destined to do.' That right there is election. Unbelievers are destined to stumble. They choose in consistency with their character, just like God chooses in consistency with His character."

Marcus opened his mouth to object, but he wasn't sure what to say, so he shut it again. They had reached Marcus' house.

"I'll call you later, Erwin. I want to talk to my father about this."

"Certainly. I'm always open to discussion. Tell your family I said 'Hello!'"

"Alright. Thanks for taking me."

Marcus jumped out of the car, ran up the porch steps, and waved goodbye as Erwin drove homewards.

--To be Continued. . .

Milly and Noella gently rustled through the early summer grass together. They held each others hands loosely, and moved on in their solemn errand. They followed a whispering creek to a meadow where several small mounds dotted the sun-warm banks. Noella read the faded markers, but as she read the names, tears came to her eyes in a renewal of pushed-aside grief. Milly knelt by the newest one. As of yet, no stone marked the name of the occupant of the little grave. Surrounding it were other tiny sepulchers-- Tommy, Destiny, Nehemiah, and many others.

"Nine," Milly breathed. "So many!"

Noella caught her breath. "I know," she mournfully intoned. Neither girl said anything many minutes. "I feel so empty." Another long pause. "I hurt most when we sit down to supper, and though everyone is really there, I feel as if these nine are missing, missing, never to be reclaimed till death takes me as well. So silent, so cold. The silent nine."

Noella broke down in racking sobs, and Milly lead her away, both girls with heavy hearts.

Based on a true story, and dedicated to Jackie L., mother of Baby L., and of all the silent nine. Gerich meleth nin!

Chapter Four of my Erwin story. Let me know what you think!

Pastor Davies rose from his high-backed chair. Brushing asside some of the shades, he silently watched Erwin and Marcus clamber into the Toyota. Wordlessly, he re-played the interview in his mind.

Erwin's arguments had been clear, coherent, and concise. Since God is faithful, He is also just. Since He is just, not all agree with His justice, just as not all humans agree with human retribution. Since some disagree, not all can be saved. Since not all can be saved, God welcomes the elect. Point by point, he had built his case soley on the undeniable facts of God's character.

The challanged pastor ran his fingers through his greying hair, and his eye caught two books Erwin had left with him. The first was The Gospel for Real Life, by Jerry Bridges. The second, written by C.J. Mahaney, Christ Our Mediator. Pastor Davies scanned his mental list of books, and did not recall reading either, nor hearing of their authors.

Having nothing better to do, he opened The Gospel for Real Life. Christ Our Mediator, the undeniably shorter of the two, would be an easier read, but Pastor Davies didn't care. But just as he flipped to the first chapter, his cell phone rang. His wife was calling him, so he took the call. By the time he had finished talking, he had decided to put off the reading of the books for a more convenient time. He decided that he had better spend some time in the word and in meditation.
This month, Pastor Davies had purposed to study the Pauline epistles, and as Providence would have it, he was this week studying the letter to the Ephesians.

He began to read, slowly at first, and then excitedly, and with great aggitation. He read the first paragraph silently, then aloud to himself, as if hearing the words might help him.

" 'Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, To the saints in Ephesus, the faithful in Christ Jesus: Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.' "

Here he paused, then went back and read the words over again, this time commentating on them in a low tone.

"Paul was an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God. That is what Erwin meant when he was talking about sovereignty. Everything that happens is because of the will of God!" He said it feelingly, as if he had never considered it before. He continued on in the passage.

" 'For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will. . .' God chose me through Christ's redemption, even before the world was created. I am to be holy and blameless in His sight, too! He predestined me, even adopted me, as His son in accordance with his pleasure and will!! His pleasure! It is in me!"

No longer could Pastor Davies sit still. He ran out of his office and ran into the parking lot. He ran down the road as fast as he could go, his arms out stretched. "Thank you, Lord! Thank you for opening my eyes!" He ran until he stumbled over a crack in the pavement. He looked around. He had been running with his head thrown back, and he now saw that he was at least a mile from his church. Energetically, he quickly retraced his steps. He had a lot of reading to do. There was so much to be done. Two red spots appeared on his cheeks, and he threw himself into study with the strength of a beast. He was flushed and evidently excited. Every now and then, he would look up from a book and mutter mullingly, "I feel like a new person."

--To be continued.

What was Marcus's conversation like with Erwin as they drove homewards? What will Pastor Davies's congregation say about what he discovered in Ephesians? All this and more, coming in the next few chapters.