Homeschooling from the Heart

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April 17, 2008 - I'm Coming Back....

I have been away from my blog for awhile, but I'm hoping to be a more frequent poster now that I seem to be on an upswing in my life. You see, lately I've been battling the terrible illness called depression. I've known people, in my own family even, that have experienced this condition but I never before understood why it was such a terrible thing and I never thought it would affect me personally. I can't exactly pinpoint when it all started. I can think of a couple of semi-traumatic events in the past couple of years that might have triggered it but it was really a gradual thing that took hold of me and at first I could not recognize it for what it really was. I thought I was just tired and lazy, and possibly a little hormonal with a bad case of PMS each month. (I tend to blame myself for everything whether it's my fault or not anyway, not good for someone in my situation.) But I truly saw it for what it was in the last month or two. I would be trying to go to sleep at night while thoughts and emotions would be wreaking havoc with my mind. Little things would make me cry. Things that would be no big deal to a healthy person. People were starting to notice and someone even commented to me that I looked sad. That was when I decided I needed to take action. So me, Erika , who keeps everything to herself, finally let her husband know what was going on. (But only after researching herbal antidepressants and making a trip to the health food store!) I haven't yet seen a doctor. I'm not sure that I will for this, but I'm not opposed to it if what I'm doing now isn't successful. I am due to go in for my yearly physical soon, so I'll talk about it with her then. I am just not wanting to take any of the stronger drugs and I don't want a doctor telling me that I need to when I can take something natural and with less side effects that will do the same job. So now I am allowing myself a recovery period. I'm letting the St Johns Positive Thoughts take effect and allowing myself to take baby steps in putting my house back in order without getting overwhelmed and giving my children the attention they need and that I've neglected to give them lately. That in itself is a challenge for me, but the Lord has been faithful to help me though this already. This morning He got me up early and I read a powerful devotion that is speaking to my situation. He is putting people in my path that can impart wisdom to me and help erase those unhealthy thoughts about myself. He's even helping me to open up a little by sharing my experiences in this blog. (You just can't know how hard it was at first to type this entry!) He's also bringing spring and warmer weather and more sunshine which is something I've been longing for since early March! I can hear birds outside singing and it is so uplifting. God is so Good! I am also hoping that by sharing this here I might hear from others with similar experiences so we can hold each other accountable to take positive steps toward recovery (feel free to send me a private message).

I would like to close by sharing the scripture that the Lord led me to this morning.

James 1:2-8 (Good News Translation) **emphasis mine**

My friends, consider yourselves fortunate when all kinds of trials come your way, for you know that when your faith succeeds in facing such trials, the result is the ability to endure. Make sure that your endurance carries you all the way without failing, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. But if any of you lack wisdom, you should pray to God, who will give it to you; because God gives generously and graciously to all. But when you pray, you must believe and not doubt at all. Whoever doubts is like a wave in the sea that is driven and blown about by the wind. If you are like that, unable to make up your mind and undecided in all you do, you must not think that you will receive anything from the Lord.

Now I must go, because I want to get breakfast started so that my husband can have a morning off.

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November 21, 2007 - I haven't blogged in awhile....

...because I haven't been inspired. But I think that is changing a little.

Some updates on us:

I'm an Avon lady now! My first order should be in tomorrow. I'm excited about this opportunity to hopefully earn a little extra money for myself and our family. I'm hoping to save enough money to get my first sled dog. The breed I'm interested in is a Chinook. (It's pronounced SHIN-ook, I always tend to say it wrong.) The price tag is a little high (about $1000) but I'm finding that most quality bred dogs are not cheap. Even a rescue or shelter dog will run around $200 in adoption fees plus any vet care that it will most likely need. I had the opportunity to visit my aunt in Alaska during a summer when I was still in high school and while I was there I saw mushers racing dogs using carts much like this. It wasn't long before I started dreaming about getting my own dogs, and since I lived in the snowy Upper Peninsula it seemed like a good hobby to get into when the typical snow season is 5-6 months long. I no longer live that far north but that desire is still there. This breed of dog is good for families, but are also bred to pull. The history on the Chinook is fascinating, as they were started from one dog named Chinook , and one of the first sledding teams of Chinooks took part in exploring Antarctica in the early 1900s. I recently met a couple of local Chinooks and I am planning on attending the annual UKC Chinook Specialty in Kalamazoo this summer to meet more dogs and breeders. Hopefully, the timing will be right so that we can get our own puppy later in 2008. I just need to have the funds and there has to be a litter of puppies not too far away (with one of them for me!) at the same time.

We are getting ready to head back to Hawaii to visit Anthony's family. Soon his parents will be moving here to the mainland to live closer to us now that they've retired. It will be cheaper for them to live here on a retirement income and they'll have easier access to their grandchildren. I'm looking forward to 3 weeks in Hawaii with my husband free from the distractions of his job and home improvement projects. Our most stressful decision over there will be what to eat.

Also! I recently learned that my great-aunt Doris lives on the same island as my mil and fil now. She was living on Maui and we did get to visit her there about 7 years ago. It will be nice to see her again and I intend to add to my genealogy records if I can get enough time to visit with her. She is the sister of my father's mother, named Kathleen. Kathleen passed away in 1982 at the age of 55 from colon cancer when I was 5. I have a few fuzzy memories of her and a couple of pictures of her and I together. All my memories are of a smiling face, warm hugs, and lots of love. She was the mother of 9 children (8 of them boys!), my dad was the 5th boy, then the daughter came after him. When she wasn't taking care of her family, she was playing the organ at the little country church and singing her heart out for the Lord.

Here are some of my favorite pictures of me with my Muumuu (a Finnish term for grandma):

The one of the two of us sitting on the organ bench in our Easter dresses I remember clear as day. One thing I've learned from not having her in my life growing up and now, is how important it is for us as mothers to take care of ourselves and not let our health deteriorate. We need to eat well, exercise and pray hard, not hold on to grudges or anything that keeps us from being the best that we can be for the Lord and our families.

I better stop now. This is what I get for trying to blog after a long absence when I can't sleep. I hardly make sense to myself. Congratulate yourself if you followed me down this little bunny trail.....

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October 29, 2007 - Contest Part 2, but better....

I'm going to try this again, this time for $250 worth of Vision Forum products courtesy of Kim at Life In a Shoe.

I won't have a problem adding to my wish list. If you want to enter the contest you have until Friday to do it. See here for details.

Fidelia doll $89
Princess Ka'iulani Doll Dress $19
Teach Them to Your Children $17
Pouch of Ancient Coins $18
At the Sound of the Bugle $22
The League of Grateful Sons $20
Home-Making $20
Landmarks and Liberty $45

That adds up to exactly $250.

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October 26, 2007 - A contest

I'm entering a contest to win $150 of merchandise from Vision Forum. This is the last day and my wish list is below. Here is the link to more info on the contest.

Fidelia doll
Teach Them to Your Children book
Pouch of Ancient Coins
Home-Making book

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September 28, 2007 - Vehicle Update

My van is still in the shop, but while it's there I get to drive one of these:

The one we have (at NO extra cost to us) is silver. If you live in the Detroit area and need to see a Chevy dealer for repairs I'll give you a recommendation for this place. So, I am not in too much of a hurry to get my van back since I'm driving in style in the meantime.

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About Me

I am a Christian wife and mother of 3 in Michigan. This is where I will be sharing our experiences in homeschooling our children. I welcome comments and look forward to hearing from my readers!